Disclaimer: I don't know kung fu. There is too a spoon. And the Wachowskis have only made one movie I like, and it's probably not the one you think. Also, I don't own Harry Potter.

Author's Note - Sorry about the wait, everyone. Thank you to everyone who's still reading this story, and double thanks to everyone who started reading a couple months after the last chapter was posted. You know who you are, and so do I thanks to notifications, bwah hah hah. So yeah, enjoy!

Usagi panted as she leaned against the door frame, trying to catch her breath. She'd run all the way from her house, and while she was in surprisingly good shape considering her eating habits it was still above thirty degrees (celcius) outside. Worse, it was ten AM. To put it simply, Usagi hated mornings. She had always had a problem with getting up on time for school, and adding a nightlife that involved running away from monsters only made her sleep more soundly. As it was summer break, there were only three words that could get Usagi up before noon. One was Mamoru. The other two were ice cream. All three had been invoked, and so Usagi was out of bed, dressed, and had run like Sturmwolves were chasing her. (It was hard to remember individual monsters after all this time, so it was quite possible that she HAD been chased by Sturmwolves at least once)

Once she had caught her breath and composed herself enough to be seen by her boyfriend, Usagi stepped inside the shop and headed straight for the corner table where the dark-haired guy was waiting for her. She slid into the chair opposite him and blinked a couple times. "Harry? Where's Mamoru?"

Harry shrugged. "I don't know, I haven't seen him in days. Not since that patrol the other night, actually. Why?"

Usagi wilted. "Mom told me that Mamoru wanted me to meet him here for ice cream…" It was official, the world was a cruel place.

The British boy smiled sheepishly. "I think that's my fault… When I called your house, your mother wanted to know who I was, so I told her I was a friend of Mamoru's. I supposed it must have gotten a bit garbled from there."

"Oh geez, Mom…" Usagi sighed, completely dismissing the notion that she might have misheard her mother in her half-asleep state. "Alright, Harry," she said with a yawn, "What do you need? And you owe me ice cream for getting up this early."

"Early?" Harry asked in confusion. He'd been up since seven, packing. "Of course I'll buy ice cream, I wouldn't have asked you to meet me here if I wasn't."

"Super, Harry, you're the best!" Usagi cried as she grabbed up the menu and started poring through it. "I want a banana sundae with six scoops of-"

"Slow down," Harry protested. "Business first, alright? Remember, Usagi, I've seen you eat. Once you get something sweet in your mouth, you don't notice anything else at all - and this is important."

"Phooey..." she huffed, then perked up. "Oooh, lemme guess, you want advice on how to ask out Makoto? Harry, you sly dog, it's about time…"

He growled and shook his head, cheeks flushing just a little. "It's not that at all. I mean, she's amazing, but I'm too young for her, and…" He took a deep breath. "This is about Master Flitwick."

"Don't tell me HE wants a date with Makoto…" Usagi made a face.

Harry was really getting frustrated. "This is not about Makoto, it's about you."

"Well, I'm not dating him, he's cute for an old guy but he's gotta be what, eighty?"

"Over a hundred and twenty. And he doesn't want to date you, he wants to meet you."

"What? We met last night, remember?"

"No," Harry shook his head. "He wants to be formally introduced… to Princess Serenity."

Usagi blinked. She blinked again. She blinked a third time. "He wants to meet …me as a Princess?"

"Yes," sighed Harry, happy to finally be getting through to her.

"Why?"

"He's an envoy from the High Chieftain of the Goblins."

"The what of the who? No really, goblins are real?"

"They're very real. They're hard to describe, I don't know a lot about them, really, but they're kinda short, kinda grumpy, they live underground, and they run the bank in Magical England."

Usagi blinked. "So….short cranky bankers want to meet me?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

Harry threw up his hands. "I don't know. But Master Flitwick is paying me the equivalent of ten thousand pounds to deliver this message and arrange the meeting."

"Ten thousand pounds? How much is that in yen?" Harry gave her his best guess, and her eyes bugged out. "I hope he offers ME that much for a meeting."

Reaching into his bag, Harry pulled out a scroll bound by a ribbon and sealed with gold wax. "Look, here is the message. It's enchanted to unroll and read itself, just touch the seal – and remember not to touch it unless you're in private, it'd probably freak your family out if you haven't told them about all this Moon Kingdom business."

Usagi shook her head. "Nuh-uh no way, my dad would never understand. He already thinks Mamo-chan is way too old for me." She reached out for the scroll, and he handed it to her. "So I guess I'd better go find Ami and the others, huh? At least I'll have an excuse to break out my gorgeous Moon Princess dress…"

"Yeah, about that… Ami's going to be out of town for the weekend, so if you want her help you'd better schedule the meeting for next week some time."

Usagi stuffed the scroll in her skirt pocket, crumpling it a little. "Out of town? Where's she going?"

"She's going to Hong Kong with Sirius and I, we're leaving this afternoon."

"Hong Kong?!" Usagi cried incredulously. "What's in Hong Kong, besides a lot of punchy screamy movies?"

Harry grinned. "New wands, for starters. I'm sure she'll tell you all about it on Monday, we won't be back til Sunday night."

"Ugh, Monday… I can't believe there's only a week left before school starts up again, I haven't even caught up on my sleep…"

"I'm really looking forward to it," he replied. At her 'are you kidding' look, he grinned. "I've worked hard this summer, I'm looking forward to seeing what exactly I've earned."

"You're so weird, Harry…" Usagi sighed. "Have you heard about your test scores yet?"

He nodded happily. "They called an hour ago, they're going to mail the detailed scores to me but I did well enough that I'll be able to join my year. Class 2-E, homeroom teacher Sakurada-sensei…" he recited proudly.

Usagi blinked. "Wow, that's my old homeroom teacher… and my brother's class. Great…"

"I know, I know, I'm forbidden to like Gundam." Harry was starting to think that whatever Gundam was, he might end up liking it just to be contrary.

"And don't you forget it. That is a royal command from Princess Serenity," she said with a lofty tone and a nose stuck up in the air. "And Harry…?"

"Yes?" he asked, stifling a laugh.

"Don't forget my ice cream either." This time he did laugh, and reached for the menu. His pocket money was about to take a beating.

Elsewhere in the world, Tom the bartender at the Leaky Cauldron had finally found enough of a lull in his evening business to sit down and pick up the Quibbler. This month's issues had arrived in the late morning, delivered by one of Xeno Lovegood's specially-trained Giant Budgies. As usual, one of his customers had bought one for a laugh, but after a few minutes he started it showing the magazine around. Soon more and more copies were being bought, and Tom had had to snatch the last Quibbler for himself. A couple minutes later, he'd sent off an owl to Xeno for more copies. As word had got around, more and more people had come in for a pint and a meal and a Quibbler, and Tom had been kept running all evening. Even now, he had only the vaguest idea that that missing Potter boy had written back about that Skeeter woman's articles, which he supposed was plenty of reason to get excited. Things had been lively in the Alley ever since word had got around about the Boy-Who-Lived going missing. Sitting down on a stool behind the bar, Tom pulled his copy out of its hiding place and opened it. In typical Xeno Lovegood fashion, the article that had everyone excited was third in the magazine, after "More Blancmange Attacks in Cornwall!" and "Fudge Sends Elite Hit-Wizards to Buy His Lunch!"

"BOY-WHO-LIVED WRITES LETTER!"

With commentary by Xenophilius Lovegood

As the editor of the only honest news publication in Magical Britain, I often find myself in possession of some very strange materials. One of the strangest this week was the envelope that arrived in my office by means of special Gringott's courier. The courier declared that Harry James Potter, aka "The Boy-Who-Lived", aka "Not the Heir of Slytherin", aka "Elmo MacBroodingpants", aka "The Malfoy-ler", aka "He-Whose-Name-Is-Fun-To-Say-Quickly" (additional titles courtesy of my Hogwarts correspondent, Ulna Olovodeg), wished for the Quibbler to publish his letter in response to certain articles in the Daily Prophet, provided that it was published unaltered and in its entirety. The letter itself bore a Gringott's Verification Seal, which means that Gringott's Bank itself gives its word that it is indeed Mr. Potter's writing and that it cannot be altered without the seal destroying itself and Very Bad Things happening to the one responsible. So without further ado, Mr. Potter's letter:

To Whom It May Concern,

Greetings to Magical Britain from my very undisclosed location. Recently, someone forwarded a copy of the Daily Prophet to me containing Ms. Skeeter's rather …enthusiastic article about my departure from England. Yes, it's true, I've left the country for now, but claiming that I've abandoned England is a bit dramatic, don't you think? The fact of the matter is that I've gone on a world tour to broaden my educational horizons. While I retain many fond memories and friends at Hogwarts, the fact is that there is a whole world of magic beyond Britain's shores and I've been lucky enough to be invited to take part in it. My guardian – who wishes to remain nameless but is in fact a blood relative on my father's side – has been taking good care of me and I have never felt safer in my life.

Now, perhaps I should address some of the things Ms. Skeeter mentioned, before anyone gets the wrong idea. My aunt and uncle are indeed very unpleasant people and yes, my childhood with them wasn't very happy. But I'm well shot of them now, and I think the best punishment for them would be to leave them alone and let them be the miserable, greedy, friendless people that they are. Besides, going after Muggles with magic is not only illegal, it's bullying and I know that the witches and wizards of England are better than that. Secondly, Ms. Skeeter seems to be under the impression that I need to be lured back to England by some kind of grand show of 'doing something about the dangers that plague our society.' I'm not sure what dangers she has in mind, since I've never met her in my life and I'm not planning to agree to any interviews, but would you mind if I made a suggestion or two?

Let's start with werewolves. Recently, one of the best Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers Hogwarts has had in years resigned because he had been exposed as a werewolf and didn't wish to make Headmaster Dumbledore have to face down angry parents on his behalf. He resigned at the end of the year, which means that he spent ten months inside Hogwarts – during which we had dementors and an alleged mad murderer visit the castle, guests sure to raise the hackles of anyone – without a single person coming to harm or even any real scares. Three nights a month, Professor Lupin took a potion – prepared by Potions Master Severus Snape – that eased the symptoms of his condition and allowed him to rest quietly, locked in his quarters just for good measure. During the day, he taught his students to the best of his considerable ability (check the scores, I know I did a lot better on my exams this year than in the previous two), and very rarely had a harsh word for anyone. Professor Remus Lupin is a good man – who happens to also be a werewolf.

Now I'm sure at least some of you are thinking "But Harry, surely they're not all good doggies". Of course not. There are bad people who also happen to be werewolves. Fenrir Greyback, whom I have heard is a very bad doggy indeed, is probably the sort of man who would be a horrible person even if he'd never even heard of werewolves, let alone become one himself. There are probably more than a few other werewolves who are horrible people, just as there are witches and wizards who are horrible people. But how do we know there aren't at least some werewolves who would rather be decent people, if they could find a way to do it? The laws in England make it very hard for a werewolf to get a decent job, I'm told, and worse it's very hard to get an education as werewolves are banned from most wizarding schools in England. If a good, honest job is legally beyond your reach, then how could it be a surprise if you choose work that isn't good OR honest?

It's entirely possible that I'm wrong about this, but why not try and find out? Are there good people who happen to be werewolves, who'd be happy to be productive members of society if given a chance to? What have we got to lose by at least talking about it?

Another thing to think about – I've also read that at the Quidditch World Cup, a handful of wizards thought it would be very funny to dress up like Voldemort's (Editor's Note – We know our readers will find this use of You-Know-Who's name shocking, but Gringott's would not allow us the edit and we did not want Very Bad Things to happen to us) old followers and torment the family that owned the World Cup campsite. The way I've heard it told, people panicked and ran, muddling things up so that the Aurors couldn't get to these hooligans in time to catch them. I don't know if those people really were followers of Voldemort (Editor's Note – See previous editor's note) or not, but they were outnumbered a hundred to one by the ordinary witches and wizards at the campsite. Imagine if the people there had kept their heads and, instead of fleeing, fought back. Imagine you're a crazy person, out on a pleasant summer's evening enjoying the fresh air and a bit of Muggle torture just on a lark. Now imagine that a hundred people have decided to not be afraid and instead have taken out their wands to cast a Stunning Hex at you. Sure, perhaps you're good at Defense, but can you really block one hundred Stunners at once? I really doubt I could. So the next time you see someone out to hurt people, don't just run away screaming. Why not find a bit of cover or the corner of a building, then give them back a bit of their own? Why not Stun them silly and turn them over to the Aurors?

My guardian has just reminded me that a hundred people trying to hex a 'hooligan' all at once could end up with people accidentally hexing each other. So I'll retract the previous advice and offer this instead – why not dust off your old textbooks and brush up your defensive skills a little? The Department of Magical Law Enforcement surely has better advice to offer, but what I'm trying to say is this: Yes, there are scary things in the world, I know this as well as anyone. But when things get scary, the person who keeps his head will fare much better than the person who gives in to fear and runs away screaming. We are wizards and witches, we can do magic. Each of us has a wand, a powerful tool that can change the world around us. Let us use them, carefully, responsibly, and for the benefit of all magical beings. Thank you for listening.

Still a son of England,

Harry J. Potter

P.S.: Please give my congratulations to Ireland, I heard that their game against Bulgaria in the QWC Final was fantastic.

Tom put down the magazine and rubbed his forehead. "Well, at least he doesn't sound like he's mad at us," he concluded, "but trying to help werewolves? That kid's got big brass ones for sure."

In an equally undisclosed location somewhere in England, a fat man whose appearance invoked the word 'ratty' was holding another copy of the Quibbler for his master to read. "So," the voice rasped, "Potter really has fled England. It won't save him, Wormtail. Nothing will save him from me…"

Peter Pettigrew swallowed and looked down at the homunculus on his lap. "B-but my lord, it's difficult enough to move around unnoticed as it is. How are we g-going to track down Potter?" He hated the way his voice stammered, but with the way his master set his nerves on edge through sheer presence it was unavoidable. Alive, dead, or embodied in an enchanted sack of miscellaneous flesh the size of a child, the Dark Lord was the most terrifying creature he'd ever met.

"We're not going to track him down, Wormtail." Voldemort said in exasperation. "We're going to force him to return. Call for my most faithful servant, it seems that our plan will require some …alteration."

Back in Tokyo, Usagi had called a Sailor Senshi meeting. Since it was incredibly rare for her to do so, the others had pretty much dropped everything to gather in the temple training hall, their new unofficial headquarters. "Usagi, what is it?" Makoto asked "You look like you've seen a ghost."

Usagi held out the scroll Harry had given her. "Remember that old guy at Harry's place yesterday? The one with the beard and the staff and the jewelry? It turns out that he's a messenger from what I think is the King of the Goblins." Mina perked up for a moment before realizing that whoever the Goblin King was, he probably didn't look like David Bowie. "He wants a formal meeting …reception …thing …with Princess Serenity."

Everyone gave her a stunned look, and so she touched her thumb to the seal again. The scroll rose from her hand, unrolling itself in the air. The words written on it were scribed three times, once in the Goblin language, once in kanji, and once in a strange symbolic script that seemed to consist of patterns of crescents, circles, and connecting lines. As soon as the scroll was fully unfurled, though, a voice began to speak, speaking first in Goblin and then in Nihongo.

"Gallius Flitwick, Forge-Master, Chosen Speaker for the High Chieftain of the Goblin Clans,"

"Addresses you,"

Serenity, Daughter of Serenity, Princess, Inheritor, and Keeper of the Moon Kingdom."

In Ancient Days the Moon shone down upon the Goblin Clans,"

"The Silver Light of Serenity did grace our halls and forges."

"The Queen was lost, the Moon was lost, the Silver Light dimmed and faded,"

"But the Goblin Clans endured, and the Goblin Clans did not forget."

"They waited. They watched. Until the day when"

"The Silver Light of Serenity began to shine once more."

"We saw. We heard. And we have come."

"Let the Moon Princess choose time and place,"

"The Goblin Speaker shall come, and bring the words of the High Chieftain."

"There is much to discuss."

Once its message had been recited, the scroll rolled itself up again and fell back into Usagi's hand. The room was silent for several long seconds until Rei finally asked "…was that poetry?" incredulously.

Usagi shrugged. "I dunno, I'm barely passing Literature remember? Harry assured me that this is really real. The Goblins run the magic banks in England and Hong Kong and apparently they don't mess around."

"It sounds like this is a really big thing for them," Makoto said with a frown. "So we've got to take this really seriously."

Mina nodded. "And did anyone catch that they're claiming they knew Queen Serenity long long ago? Artemis, what do you know about that?"

The white cat curled up in Mina's lap and thought about it. Finally, he shook his head. "I don't remember anything for sure, but when I think of Goblins I get a very specific picture in my head. So… maybe they were around back then and I've just forgotten."

"You're supposed to be our advisors," grumbled Usagi. "What good is it if you don't remember anything?"

Artemis scowled. "Look, Luna and I are cats. We're magically-enhanced, intelligent, talking cats, but underneath it all we're still cats. Long-term memory was not part of our original nature. Also, we've been wrapped up in magical stasis for a thousand years. How good are YOU at remembering minor details from a millennium ago?"

"Okay, okay... Don't cough up a hairball…" Usagi muttered. "So this is important, and …what do we do about it? It'd be rude to refuse, right?"

"Right," Mina agreed. "And we don't want to insult them by not doing enough, but I have no idea what good enough would look like. It's not like we have a palace we can invite him to…"

"What's wrong with here?" Makoto asked, gesturing around. "Sure, it's kinda bare now, but it's the most impressive place we have handy and maybe we can, you know, dress it up a bit?" She wasn't sure she believed her own words, though, for all that they were princesses reborn they didn't exactly have a royal treasury. Or even a royal jar for loose change.

"Makoto is probably right," Rei agreed. "But let me ask Hikawa-sama for guidance first, this is his temple and it's better to ask permission than beg forgiveness."

"Isn't that phrase usually the other way around?" Mina said, scratching her head.

Rei smiled. "Not when you're dealing with a fire-god."

"Ooooooh, good point. Let's keep Hikawa-sama happy."

Getting the fire-god's permission was a matter of a few minutes and an offering of incense and the latest scorched stick from Fawkes. The phoenix and the kami had struck up an odd sort of pen pal exchange, passed back and forth through the PPPS, the Potter Portkey Postbox Service (phoenix rate two knuts an item, nosey headmasters a sickle, Weasleys could pay in biscuits, and the general public could go sniff a rope). When the situation was explained, Hikawa-sama insisted (through Rei, the kami preferred not to speak aloud to avoid startling visitors) that the shrine itself would make an excellent meeting place and that what it lacked in royal splendor it made up for in the grandeur of tradition, spiritual purity, and the presence of an actual god. Having no better ideas and not wishing to offend the patron of their sanctuary, the Senshi agreed.

The next issue was how to properly reply to the invitation. The girls wracked their brains for hours, throwing out idea after idea only to reject them as being not formal enough, beyond their means to afford, or (usually for Usagi's ideas) impractical to the point of silliness. ("Where are we going to get a pen made of crystal and ink made from stardust? And I'm pretty sure that there's no such thing as moon-silk vellum.") Various magical means were discussed, but the difference between having magic and knowing how to use it was becoming shockingly apparent. Even the wording was a source of vexation, as none of them had ever written a formal letter or anything (successfully) poetic in their lives. They all agreed that Ami could probably figure it out and get it done in no time at all, but alas Ami was off to Hong Kong.

The late night turned into a sleepover at Rei's place, and in the morning they tried again. When Hedwig and Crookshanks finally arrived on the scene, they found four girls and two cats sprawled around the room with headaches. "Geez," the over-sized half-kneazle scorned, "you guys are utterly useless without Blue-Hair, aren't you? Fine buncha princesses you are."

Usagi gave him the stink-eye from where she was laying on the floor and tiredly pointed a finger at him. "In the name of the Moon, I will punish you…"

"Yeah, you go ahead and do that. The next sound you hear will be me laughing in terror."

Hedwig rolled her eyes, an impressive feat for an owl but one she had lots of practice in thanks to Crookshanks. "Really, that's not helpful…"

"You want me to be helpful? Feed me. I've been living off mice and leftovers for days while trying to sniff out the Negaverse for you. The way you Japanese love your fish, you'd think some of you might share a bit with an overworked cat once in a while."

Rei got to her feet. "Much as you annoy me, cat, you've got a point. Would you like anything, Hedwig-san?"

The owl hesitated. "I don't suppose you've got a bit of bacon by any chance? I'm afraid that I developed a taste for it in England even though it's really not good for me."

"I'll see what I can do." Rei headed to the kitchen, and a while later Crookshanks had half a bonito to himself while Hedwig feasted on strips of butubara (pork belly). It wasn't cured like bacon, but Hedwig was in no mood to complain. When Luna and Artemis politely inquired about the other half of the fish, it was served up to their gratitude. When Usagi begged for breakfast, though, she got a scowl and a "you know where the kitchen is, make it yourself" instead.

"Rei, you're so mean… You make delicious-smelling food for cats and a bird, but not for your Princess?"

Rei folded her arms. "You're darn right I do. It just hit me that we take them for granted a lot of the time. They're our counselors and guides, they've been watching our backs and saving our butts for years, and we treat them like pets instead of allies. How many times has Luna risked her life distracting a yoma for you, Usagi?"

"Hey, Luna eats pretty well at my house."

"Sure, because your mom feeds her. If she had to depend on you, she'd be a little kitty skeleton. So here's how it's gonna be, guys. The temple's had a surge in donations since the festival, Grandpa won't mind if I pad the grocery budget a little and use it to show our fur-and-feather allies some appreciation."

Crookshanks gave Luna and Artemis a superior look. "See what happens when you complain a little?"

Hedwig gave him a withering look. "You've done nothing but complain since you first gained the ability to speak. Miss Rei, thank you but you needn't go to a lot of trouble on my account. I hunt for most of my food, and Harry and Sirius have always been generous even if they have trouble recognizing what's what at the grocery store."

Artemis nodded. "We're not going to turn down a nice grilled fish every now and then, but it really is the thought that counts."

"Typical," Crookshanks grumbled. "The girl wants to spoil us like we deserve, and you lot try to turn her down. I'm surrounded by idiots."

Rei shook her head. "You are getting fish in the hope that an incentive might get you to contribute something besides bad attitude for a change."

The ginger cat snorted. "Crass bribery, huh? It's about time you tried that. Keep it up and we'll get somewhere."

"Well? Do you have anything helpful to say or not?"

"Sure. Stop freaking out about that old Goblin guy. He's here to open communications, not start a war. If you want to get through this and look good doing it, pull your royal knickers up and BE the bloody Princesses of the Moon Kingdom. Doesn't matter that you don't have a patch of earth to call your own or two coins to rub together, you've got a lifetime supply of shiny tiaras and enough magic to make a whale sprout wings and fly. You've fought demons and monsters, thrown down evil queens, and saved more lives than you can count. If you want to impress the Goblins, you go and meet that old man with two thoughts in your head. First, 'I am a goddamn Princess, and I'm bloody important.' Second, 'You are just as bloody important as I am, and I want to hear what you have to say.' Goblins appreciate a show of respect, give them that respect and show them that your respect means something, and you'll impress the hell out of them."

Makoto whistled. "That's…actually pretty helpful."

Crookshanks snorted. "And that's what half a decent-sized fish will get you. Imagine what you could get for a whole salmon, hint hint."

"So…do you know a lot about the Goblins?" Minako asked.

"Nope."

"Then how did you…"

The cat snorted. "Name one person who wouldn't like to be shown respect or treated like they matter."

Minako tilted her head. "Ooh, good point. Okay, guys, so what do we do about the invitation, something polite and to the point? I've got some really nice stationary at home."

"Yeah," Makoto yawned. "Who has the best handwriting? I know it isn't me…"

"I can do it," Usagi said excitedly. "I have great handwriting!"

Mina scooted over to give her a hug. "Usagi, you're my friend and princess, but no, you don't. I've seen your homework."

"Hey, I'm better if I take it slowly… No point in wasting good penmanship on boring old homework…"

"We'll all try it," Rei declared to settle the matter. "The best one gets to do the real message. Does that sound fair?" No one had any better ideas, and so they all agreed. The contest was a draw, Rei's handwriting proved to be the most elegant when it came to kanji but Mina's English script was better, and so in the end they both wrote the reply. Usagi's penmanship was better when she took her time, though.

Around noon, Luna and Artemis snuck into Sirius Black's house through a window left open and hesitated at the door to the guest room. They could smell magic and plenty of it, and given that magic cats were still cats and therefore small, vulnerable creatures, they were hesitant to meddle with powerful magic they didn't understand. Finally, they summoned a little magic of their own (they were magic cats, after all, and it's widely-suspected that all cats have a little magic in them) and caused a knocking sound on the door.

Forge-Master Flitwick opened the door a few moments later, the smell of hot metal following him. Past him, the two guardians could see that the guest room had been replaced by another space, a large forge and workshop with its own smelter and metal molds. A hot blade lay smoldering on the anvil, a hammer resting next to it. "Yes?" the smith said as he looked down at the cats. "Can I help you?"

Luna and Artemis looked at each other and nodded. As one, they sprang into the air, drawing upon their guardian magic for a little showmanship. The two cats, one black and one white, came together in the air and whirled around each other until they began to blur, leaving the impression of a rotating yin-yang of moonlight and shadow. A scroll appeared in the air in front of them, and as Master Flitwick reached out for it the two cats suddenly shot downward to land on the floor again. As the old Goblin-man smiled they bowed to him, a gesture he returned. Without a word they dashed back outside, their job done.

Flitwick laughed as he untied the cord around the scroll and unrolled it. It was a simple message, written in two languages.

"The Goblin Speaker is welcome, and the Moon Princess eagerly awaits his words."

"The Court shall be convened under the blessing of the Fire-Kami Hikawa,"

"Tomorrow night at 9pm, at the Hikawa Shrine. A guide shall be ready if required."

He nodded, pleased. "So far, so good," he mused. "But this could still go terribly wrong…"

The next evening, Master Flitwick walked up the front steps of the Shrine, accompanied by Hedwig. He had been wearing his 'mild-mannered elderly gentleman' disguise on the streets, but as the grounds of the shrine proved to be empty he relaxed the glamour. As impressive as he'd been as a Forge-Master on the day of his arrival, tonight he was the Speaker for the High Chieftain and therefore it was upon him to truly make a show. His snowy hair had been brushed until it gleamed, and then woven with silver chains into an elaborate braid. His cloak was made of chainmail so fine that it almost looked like cloth, rippling silver in the light of the rising moon. His breastplate was both scarred from countless battles and polished to a high shine, it was an ancient piece that signified the Goblin Speaker and served as a reminder of how often diplomacy could turn into violence and vice versa. For that same reason he wore a sword on his belt; he preferred a hammer but hammers sadly just weren't elegant. Visually, hammers begged for problems to fix while axes seemed to demand a head to remove. Swords simply stated that their bearer was someone of importance, and so as a diplomat he wore one.

The last piece of finery was a staff, but unlike his everyday staff this one was made of goblin silver and capped with a plumbob-shaped spire of brilliant crystal. It was even more ancient than the breastplate, though it had survived in much better condition. For centuries it had been carried by the High Chieftain's most trusted warrior, nowadays it was the symbol of the most senior advisor. Forge-Master Flitwick did not hold that position, but the staff had been lent to him all the same. Simply put, it needed to be here and so it was.

The front doors of the temple were open, and Hedwig preceded him inside. The sacred fire was burning low, casting little light, but he could see silhouettes in front of him. Taking a few more steps forward, Master Flitwick planted the silver staff firmly on the wooden floor and took a deep breath. "I am Gallius, son of Alpharis, elder of House Flitwick and adopted of Clan Gra'hadukk, acknowledged Master of the Forge and Chosen Speaker for the Goblin Clans to the Court of the Moon-Queen. The High Chieftain sends his greetings to the Moon-Princess, may her wealth be as endless as the stars and may her enemies fall to their knees in despair." Refusing to show his age the old Goblin sank to one knee, one hand still holding the staff perfectly vertical.

In the darkness, Usagi swallowed and tried to make her heart slide down from her throat. The old man was more than seven times her age, easily twice as old as Grandpa Hino, and in a country where age meant respect and reverence he was kneeling to her. He had clans and houses and power and he was so very real, and what was she? She was a teenage girl magically playing dress-up, running around in a sailor suit and a tiara made of stardust, flinging spells at monsters and thinking herself very clever and special. Usagi was suddenly very conscious of how un-special she really was.

A hand fell on her shoulder, squeezing. She looked up at Mamoru even though she couldn't see his face. Minako leaned in from her other side, whispering "Remember, you're a goddamn Princess and you're very important." Usagi nodded and did her best to believe as she took a deep breath. It was time. Activating the Senshi transformation was a matter of will, and while holding a stick and shouting a command phrase did help, it wasn't necessary if there was sufficient focus. Taking charge of the transformation and directing it into a different form was also a matter of will and focus. And once they realized that they were going to need to show off, they had practiced.

The darkness exploded into light as electricity arced down from the ceiling, gathering in an upraised hand. The power crackled and sent off miniature bolts as the hand was lowered and clenched into a fist, and then it became a tall staff of crystal, dancing within with lightning. The emblem of Jupiter glowed with brilliant green-white light at the top of the staff, illuminating Princess Jupiter. She stood tall and proud in a gown of flowing green silk, a warrior despite her elegance. "House Jupiter welcomes you."

Across the room from her a mote of fire appeared in the air, dancing for a moment and then unrolling into a column of glowing kanji that spelled out a Shinto prayer of blessing and protection. A hand reached out and took hold of the column as it burst into flame, eventually becoming a staff of black wood that burned at its tip with a flaming emblem of Mars. Princess Mars stood in the border between light and shadow, her dark hair, intense expression, and crimson dress alternately appearing and vanishing as the flame danced. "House Mars welcomes you."

Between Jupiter and the center of the room a golden star shot down from the ceiling, bouncing on the floor. It was followed by another, then another and another, until a ring of tiny stars glimmered on the wooden planks. They rose into the air, circling an elegant silhouette, and then came together in a column to become a staff of golden metal, topped with a glowing emblem that had symbolized femininity since ancient times. Princess Venus appeared, bathed in golden light and casting it back from her shimmering dress and brilliant smile. "House Venus welcomes you!"

Next to Mars and across from Venus, a white-topped cane was stamped on the floor. Tuxedo Mask faded into view as he concentrated and forced his cane to grow into a tall staff. Vines sprouted and wreathed it, and soon white roses were unfolding their blossoms up and down the length of wood. "On behalf of the Earth, I welcome you." He felt like an idiot, but what else could he say? At least he hadn't messed it up and embarrassed himself.

In the center of the room, despite the roof above them, a shining crescent moon appeared. Its light shone down in gentle rays, illuminating a feminine figure and collecting in her outstretched hands. Something held in them began to glow, and then to gleam brilliantly. The Imperium Silver Crystal drank in the moonlight and radiated it back, illuminating Princess Serenity in her gown of white and gold. "The Court of the Moon Princess welcomes you, Goblin Speaker," she said slowly, hoping her voice wouldn't stumble or crack. "Rise, and kneel to us no more."

Master Flitwick slowly rose to his feet again, refusing to show just how creaky his old joints felt. The temple fire burned higher, dispelling the darkness from the room, and the Senshi let their staves of office vanish. Stools appeared around the room, identical both in height and in cushioning, and they slid forward into a circle. "Please sit, Master Speaker," Princess Serenity said carefully. "We are eager to hear your Chieftain's words."

The old goblin sat, finding the stool to be both sturdy and comfortable. The princesses sat as well, Princess Serenity holding the gleaming crystal in her lap. Flitwick looked around the circle slowly, appraising them each in turn. The young man in the tuxedo had declined to sit, instead standing behind the young moon princess like a bodyguard. Carefully he activated the magical sense he had slowly acquired over the decades, and almost immediately he flinched so hard he nearly fell off of his stool. Bloody hell!

"Is something wrong, Master Flitwick?" Serenity asked. At Princess Mars's …encouragement, she'd also spent half an hour learning how to say his name properly.

He steadied himself carefully, still holding onto his staff. "Not wrong, I was just taken by surprise. The radiance of your gemstone is …impressive." She glanced down at it, confused. "Not just the visible light, magically it is like looking right into the sun."

Princess Serenity smiled shyly. "This is the Imperium Silver Crystal, my inheritance from Queen Serenity. It is a source of nearly limitless magical energy, but honestly we don't know very much about it yet except that most of our enemies have tried to take it from us sooner or later."

The old man returned her smile. "Then I am honored at your show of trust in allowing me to see it."

Feeling her nervousness fade a little, she held up the crystal. "Oh, it's not that big a risk. If you grabbed it and tried to use it for something evil, it'd probably fry you like a chicken cutlet. It's happened before, you know." As her companions tensed, she realized that she'd said something wrong. "Umm… but you don't seem like someone it'd try to kill…" And that wasn't helping. Oh kami, she was making an idiot of herself!

Master Flitwick looked at her for several agonizing moments before laughing. "My dear Princess, you have absolutely no idea what you're doing, do you?" Her deep blush and slumping shoulders were answer enough. "You poor girl, were you given any training at all for this? Has anyone taken it upon themselves to teach you what it means to be the heir of Serenity?"

The Imperium Silver Crystal vanished back into its hiding place as the royal transformation melted away. In the Princess's place was ordinary, everyday Usagi Tsukino on the verge of tears. "None of us have any training," she managed to choke out. "We were just handed all this magic and shown the story of how Queen Serenity sent our spirits to be reborn… But we don't know anything about the Moon Kingdom people or how they lived or… Our advisors don't even know, so they couldn't tell us…"

The other Princesses de-transformed and gathered around to lay comforting hands on their friend, but they were all surprised when Master Flitwick stood up and made his armor and weaponry vanish, leaving him in simple clothes of fine wool. Stepping forward without any sign of needing his staff, he held out a hand to her. "Why don't we go somewhere more comfortable and talk? I might be able to answer some of your questions, and we can get back to formality and diplomacy some other day."

Usagi's relief was palpable. A few more minutes saw them sitting in Rei's living room, with Yuuichirou once more wrangling snacks and Grandpa Hino keeping watch over the proceedings from the corner, much as a certain fire kami had been doing in the temple. "So, old man," Rei said, scowling at him with her arms folded. "You talk like you know a lot about Queen Serenity and the Moon Kingdom. Care to elaborate?"

"Rei! Show some respect for your guest!" ejected her grandfather, who then wilted under the dirty look she shot him.

"We have spent far too much time with cagey old men this summer, trying to determine how much of a threat they are to us and what – if any – useful information they can supply. So, Forge-Master, why don't you save us all a headache and just tell us what you know, what you want from us, and why we should give it to you?"

Flitwick scowled. "Are you her attack dog, then?" he asked, gesturing to Usagi.

Rei glared at him. "What did you say?"

"Dumbledore told me that you tore into him too. From what I remember of living with Albus, I have no doubt that he had it coming and indeed benefitted from the experience. But if you try to throw that attitude around at everyone you meet, you're going to find yourself with a lot of burned bridges in short order."

Rei opened her mouth to retort angrily, then realized what she was about to do. She closed her mouth and flushed. "I apologize, Flitwick-san… I spoke too hastily."

His eyes remained narrow. "You also owe an apology to your grandfather. This is his home, isn't it?"

She wilted. "I'm sorry, grandpa…" Grandpa Hino leaned forward to pat her arm gently.

"Now then, I received the role of Speaker from the High Chieftain only a few weeks ago. It was quite a surprise to me, as my role as a Forge-Master has nothing to do with diplomacy. Instead, I was chosen because I was born human and was presumed to be less …uncomfortable navigating a country with no magical society. It's been a rather eye-opening experience to say the least. Since my appointment, however, I have been reading every History and scrap of parchment in the Clan Archives relating to Queen Serenity and her Empire to try and understand what I am supposed to re-open relations with. I was even permitted into a very ancient vault beneath Asia Minor, in which are kept several artifacts once given to the Goblins by the Moon-Queen as well as a carefully-preserved mural of her. My dear, you are the very image of your ancient ancestor."

Usagi flushed. "So I've been told…" she said, not adding how little else she felt she had in common with the Queen.

"So the Goblins were allies with the Moon Kingdom?" Mina asked.

Flitwick nodded. "If the Histories are correct, the Clans counted Serenity as Goblin-Friend centuries before she founded her Empire. The earliest surviving entries mentioning her are dated 583 BCE and describe her as 'the brilliant human architect-sorceress from Assyria'. The details of the Clans' first dealings with her are lost, but the general tone of the surviving records implies that she was already respected to a level that no human magic-wielder had achieved before …or has since. And that was before she made her great breakthrough in 214 BCE."

The girls were hanging on his words now. "And what was that?" Usagi asked.

"Garam'hadachh, the Living Metal." The girls blinked in non-comprehension. "Goblin silver." Another slow blink. "An alchemic metal that 'understands' what it is forged into and becomes better and better at it. Make a sword of goblin silver, it becomes a better and better sword. Every time it is exposed to something that should dull or break it, it becomes sharper, stronger. Your friend Harry wears a small earring of garam'hadachh, made by myself and enchanted to translate languages. For as long as it exists, it will learn every language it is exposed to and teach it to its wearer. Theoretically, if it travels far and wide enough, it will eventually learn every spoken language in the world."

"Wow…" Mina said with starry eyes. "And Queen Serenity invented this stuff?"

"With the help of Goblin alchemists, most of whom she taught according to the story. The records say that she considered the invention of garam'hadachh a 'team effort', and when she finally left Earth she gave its secrets fully to the Goblins to keep. And we have kept them ever since, no matter who or how many have tried to take them from us."

"Have there been a lot of attempts?"

"Wars, uprisings, and punishment of attempted thefts. In the early 18th century we finally reached a treaty with Magical Britain that ended the bloodshed and got us into the banking business, nowadays we mostly have to worry about thieves, bigots, and the very occasional clever lad who unknowingly duplicates garam'hadachh through experimentation and a lot of luck."

"That last sounds awfully specific," Makoto said with a grin.

Flitwick winked. "Yes, it does, doesn't it?"

Things lapsed into awkward silence for a few moments before Mamoru spoke up. "Did the Goblins join the Moon Kingdom after Serenity went off to found it?"

"No, actually. A few emissaries were sent, but by and large the Goblins hated the idea of leaving Earth. Instead they remained close allies, and traded with the Moon Kingdom's secret island southwest of India."

"Did you say secret island?" Rei asked incredulously.

The old smith's eyes twinkled. "Why yes, I did say 'secret island'. Would anyone else like to say 'secret island'?"

Mina and Makoto looked at each other and grinned before loudly proclaiming "Secret island!"

"You guys are such dorks," Rei sighed. "But seriously, they hid a whole island? How?"

"The short answer would be 'with magic'. But since I know you probably won't accept that answer, I'll say that it was probably with a mix of secrecy charms and obscurity. Hiding an island isn't that hard when you live in an age where only the daft attempt deep-water sailing. If you're far enough from land that coastal vessels won't spot you, you may as well be invisible. Add in a few spells to discourage people from looking your way, and there you have it – a secret island."

"Secret island!" chorused Mina and Makoto again.

"Knock it off!" Rei growled, cowing no one.

"Why did they maintain a secret island on Earth?" Mamoru asked. Since they respected him more than they enjoyed tormenting Rei, Makoto and Mina held off this time.

Flitwick smiled. "To be their gateway. While the histories didn't contain the details of how it was done, they clearly state that there was a grand enchantment on the island that lured people with high magical potential into traveling to it. Apparently witches and wizards as far away as Ireland would one day find themselves setting off on an epic journey to the Island of House Earth."

Mamoru's brain began to itch. House Earth, where had he heard that mentioned recently? Wait, that woman… What was her name? Adriann, Adriann of House Earth. Oh hell. "And what happened when they got there?"

"According to the histories, they were given the chance to join the Moon Kingdom and emigrate to one of the other planets. I guess House Earth was their embassy of sorts."

"And does this secret island still exist today?" Rei growled at her two friends as they chorused 'Secret island!' once again.

Flitwick shook his head. "No, it does not. While the histories have little more than speculation as to why and how the Moon Kingdom fell, they did know that the Island of House Earth was destroyed in a magical cataclysm. All that remains of it is an underwater crater and a lingering aura of magic. Apparently the crater now holds a large and thriving community of merfolk."

"Mermaids are real too?" Usagi asked, her eyes suddenly bright with wonder.

"They are, though there are many different varieties and not all of them are as attractive or as friendly as stories might lead you to believe. The Selkie Merfolk of the British Isles, for example, have little patience for surface dwellers and the Grecian Sirens are lovely to look at but too fond of drowning unwary humans. To be honest, I've never met any of the merfolk as the Goblins avoid deep water whenever possible, but the books I've read claim that the Indo-Asian Crater tribe are a warm and friendly people, if you mind your manners."

Usagi clenched her fists and wiggled in her chair. "Oh, I want to meet a real mermaid! Do you think our magic could let us breathe underwater so we could go down and swim with them? Oooh, that would be super-cool!"

The Forge-Master looked at her, amazed at the sudden shift. A minute ago she'd been scared out of her wits. He looked over at Mamoru as if to say 'is this really what she's like?' Mamoru merely shrugged. "Are there any other questions?" Flitwick asked tiredly.

"What do the Goblins want with us now?" Rei's voice was both stern and curious.

"To see if Queen Serenity has returned, and if so, whether the Moon Kingdom wishes to revive its ancient partnership with the Goblin Clans. Apparently the Goblin Clans considered their relationship with Queen Serenity 'a very good investment', and the High Chieftain is fond of good investments."

"And what will you tell them about tonight?"

Flitwick chose to hide his irritation for now. "Only that contact has been established. I am not going to advise anything until I have a better idea of what you are." Besides a flock of unruly teenage girls, he didn't say. "Perhaps we should consider this enough for one night."

Mamoru stood up. "May I walk you out, Forge-Master?"

The young man had been watching him intently for several minutes, so Flitwick nodded. "Yes, that would be good."

Outside, they walked down the path for a minute or so before Flitwick broke the silence. "You're significantly older than the rest of them." It wasn't a question.

Mamoru nodded. "Someone has to be."

"Does it bother you?"

He shrugged. "Sometimes."

"So, what was it you wanted to ask me?"

Mamoru didn't bother trying to deny his ulterior motive. "What will happen if the Goblin Clans decide they don't want to ally with us?"

Master Flitwick thought it over. "Nothing, unless you manage to insult them in some dramatic way. Your princess seems a little …flighty, but most of the time Goblins will ignore foolishness if it isn't rooted in willful ignorance or bigotry. Even so, insults would most likely result in the Goblin banks closing their doors to you, the Goblins aren't going to go to war unless something threatens their very existence, the treaties the Clans have with the Wizarding governments are too important to break lightly."

"Usagi isn't the sharpest axe in the armory," Mamoru said with a sigh, "But her heart is good, and she tries to do the right thing even when she has no idea what she's doing. Her friends do their best to support her, but she's just a girl who's been handed power and a destiny and kept too busy fighting monsters to figure out what that power and destiny mean to her. Whatever your High Chieftain wants or expects, he'd better be prepared to be really patient in getting it."

The old man frowned. "What precisely is your relationship with the princess? You don't look similar enough to be her brother."

Mamoru hesitated. "I'm her knight…and her boyfriend." When Flitwick's eyebrows lifted, he added "It means that…"

"I know very well what it means, young man, I live underground, not under a rock. Isn't she a little young for you?"

"…From a certain perspective, yes."

"And do her parents share that perspective?"

Mamoru was simultaneously angry and embarrassed, but there was something in the elderly "Goblin's" demeanor that demanded answers. "Her mother supports it. Her father …does not."

The old man hmphed in a very elderly fashion. "You are at university, I trust?"

"Yes, sir, I'm about to start my last term."

"Medieval history?"

"Architecture, sir."

They were nearly at the shrine gate now, Hedwig perching on the top beam above them. Master Flitwick turned to look up at Mamoru. "What do you really want from me, young man?"

Mamoru swallowed down his irritation. "You gave your title as Master of the Forge, is that a ceremonial title?"

Flitwick's eyes narrowed. "Not remotely," he said, waiting for a reason to take offense. The evening had rather frayed his patience, teenagers could be amusing in small doses and he'd gotten a large one.

"Would it be possible to commission armaments from you? If not, could you recommend someone for me to ask instead?"

The Forge-Master stared at him for a long time, even engaging his magic sense. "What do you want and why?"

"A sword and some form of armor, something I can move in. As for the why, so that I can better fulfill my duties as knight."

Flitwick grunted. "Elaborate."

Mamoru gritted his teeth and then transformed into Tuxedo Mask. "The princesses have astounding levels of magic at their command. I don't, I have enough power to conjure my uniform and create the 'weapons' I use. I've been doing my best, but it's becoming obvious that it's not enough. I need something better than formalwear, a wooden cane, and a bouquet of roses."

"This country is noted for its swordsmiths. Why not go to one of them?"

"The master smiths of Japan make katanas and very fine ones too. I have been experimenting, and I am far, far better with a Western longsword than with a katana. Also, they are not part of the magical world so some very uncomfortable questions like 'why do you need a sword with a real edge' would be asked."

Flitwick began to walk around Mamoru, looking him over. "Yes, your aura seems almost strangled next to theirs. So you want better toys so that you can try to keep up with your little girlfriend?"

He gritted his teeth again. "Sir, they all matter to me. I don't know if I should call them friends, little sisters, or their majesties, but I have been used as a weapon against them before and I refuse to be a liability to them now."

"Hmm," said Flitwick, nodding approvingly. "And what would you give for such help?"

"I still not betray my friends or innocent people. Other than that, anything that is mine alone to give."

"Anything?" Flitwick asked slowly, in a tone that should have made Mamoru think twice.

Mamoru nodded. "Anything."

The Forge-Master held out a hand. "Then I, Gallius Flitwick, shall provide you with sword and armor of the finest quality I can make, in return for the price I demand. If I break my word or demand that you harm friend, family, or innocents, may this oath end my life. This I swear upon the Anvil of the Law. Take my hand, boy, and swear to pay the price I ask."

Mamoru clasped the old man's hand and made his best guess at the wording. "I, Chiba Mamoru, swear to pay the price asked of me by Gallius Flitwick, provided he not break his word or demand that I harm friends, family, or innocents. This I swear upon the Anvil of the Law."

A shock of magic ran through both men, and the sound of a hammer striking metal echoed loudly through their minds. Both of them wobbled, but did not fall. Flitwick nodded and let go of Mamoru's hand. "The bargain is made… You idiot."

"What?"

Flitwick called his staff to his hand and whacked Mamoru on the bicep with it. "You absolute moron! Never sign a contract without defining ALL of the terms, and never EVER say 'I'll pay any price' to a Goblin! You just gave me your life until I see fit to give it back to you!"

"WHAT?!" Above, Hedwig startled from her perch and headed straight for the temple.

Flitwick kept whacking Mamoru about the arms and legs. "Stupid! Gullible! Foolish! Reckless! This isn't a game, boy, you're in a world of magic and when you make a promise on magic then magic makes you KEEP your promise! Didn't your parents read you a single fairy tale?"

Mamoru found himself instinctively blocking the staff with his forearms. It still hurt, but not as badly. "I don't know, they died when I was young and I can't remember anything from before I was six."

Flitwick grounded his staff and leaned on it. "You're still an idiot, and now, you're my idiot." Glancing up the steps, he smirked. "And here comes the rescue party…"

The Senshi were running down the steps toward them, already in battle gear. "Mamo-chan!" exclaimed Sailor Moon. "Are you alright? What have you done to him, you evil old man?"

Flitwick laughed. "Nothing, yet." Mamoru glared at him. "Okay, I gave him a couple bruises, but the only real thing I've done is let him sell his freedom to me."

Sailor Moon pulled out her Crescent Moon Wand and began powering up an attack, but Sailor Jupiter grabbed her wrist to hold her back. "Wait, what exactly did you do?"

"Tell them, boy."

Mamoru grimaced. "I asked Master Flitwick to make me a sword and armor."

Jupiter blinked. "How does that make you a slave?"

"He promised me anything I wanted, within a few limits. He even sealed it with an oath."

Sailor Moon was turning pale. "Mamo-chan, no… I can't lose you again…"

"What were the limits?" Sailor Mars growled.

"I can't order him to harm his friends, his family, or any innocent."

"That's….not so bad," Sailor Venus said after a little thought. "But what exactly DO you want from him? And why do this at all?" She had hold of Sailor Moon's other arm, to keep her from trying to kill the old Goblin or glomp onto Mamoru.

Flitwick smiled, with less mockery this time. "Because he needs to learn that he is neither weak, nor a weakness. Also he needs to learn how to think instead of blindly follow his 'destiny'. Boy, here is your price – you will serve me as my apprentice. You will complete your schooling and aid your comrades in battle, but otherwise your time is mine. I will arm and armor you as promised, but I will also teach you the ways of metal and magic. Your apprenticeship will end when I and two other masters agree that you have either learned our trade or proven yourself too stupid to learn. You ought to consider yourself lucky; I've been turning down apprentices for years."

Mamoru's stomach was sinking through the pavement as he tried to grasp what he'd gotten himself in for. Apprenticed? As a smith? Sailor Moon was tearing up as well. "His time is yours? All of it?"

"Yes," Flitwick said with replenishing cruelty. "All of his spare time will be mine."

"But what about me?!"

"What about you?"

"He's my boyfriend, I need him! You can't lock him up in a tower and not let me see him!"

"I'm not going to lock him up in a tower. I'm going to lock him up in a forge, it's a very different experience. And you'll see him when he shows up for battle. If you need him." He didn't really dislike the girl, at least not much, but there was just something about her that he couldn't resist kicking.

"Nooo! Take me as your apprentice too, I'll do anything to stay with Mamo-chan!" Sailor Jupiter and Sailor Venus were still hanging onto her, even though she was trying to pull away. "You trapped him in a deal, trap me too!"

Flitwick laughed. "No. Look at you, you're skinny as a rail and have arms like toothpicks. You'd never be able to lift the hammer, and I'm not willing to take on two apprentices at once. You, Princess Serenity, have another role in life. Go live it."

"Nooooo! Mamoruuuuuuu!"

"Well, I think that's enough melodrama for one night. Come, boy, walk me back to Black's house and we'll discuss how your life is about to change." With a wave of his staff, the Forge-Master resumed his disguise.

Mamoru looked at Sailor Moon (who was sobbing her heart out) and winced. "Yes, Master…"

"Don't bother calling me that, not until you genuinely respect me."

"Whatever you say, boss." The sarcasm was every bit as thick.

Flitwick laughed as they walked away together. "Much better."

At the bottom of the stairs, the Sailor Senshi stood there in mixed shock, anger, confusion, and (in Sailor Moon's case) heartfelt bawling into Sailor Jupiter's chest. "What just happened?" Jupiter asked.

"We just screwed up a diplomatic meeting, and Mamoru just sold himself to the Goblin Envoy for I dunno how long in return for a sword," Venus summarized.

Jupiter blinked a couple times while rubbing Sailor Moon's quivering back. "Well, %$#*." No one had the heart to correct her language.