Author's Note: Hello everyone. Sorry for not updating sooner, but I've been ill. However, I'm soldiering on to write this new chapter for you. Enjoy!

I would like to thank lilo785 for their lovely review; it made me one very happy bunny! So this chapter is dedicated to you. Btw, I would really like to recommend the new Coldplay album, A Head Full Of Dreams, it's amazing! I wrote this whole chapter listening to it.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the Hunger Games.

Suddenly, a hand is on my shoulder, and I'm yanked down the dark alleyway…

Chapter 21

I'm spun around into the wall of the alley. I can feel the slime and dirt of the walls sticking to my shirt and I shiver from the cold. My eyes squint in the darkness, trying desperately to adjust to the dim light. I'm reminded of a happier time in the rain, when Peeta pushed me against the garden wall and pushed his mouth against mine; with so much passion that it left me breathless. However, when I look at the person pinning me against the wall, to my horror it is not Peeta. It's him. I try to push away from the wall.

"What the hell are you doing?" I shout at him. "Let me go!" He snarls in response and brings my hands above my head, holding them with one arm so that I am trapped and cannot possibly move.

"Miss Everdeen," He says calmly, the sound of my name on his lips hissing and cruel. "We seem to have a predicament on our hands. You probably know who I am. I saw you staring at me in the interview room with lust in your eyes." I stare at him in shock.

"You're wrong!" I shout. "I don't even know who you are!" How could this stranger conceive that I desire him? I don't even know what that means. I've never felt anything but annoyance and fear for this man.

"I'm a reporter. My job is to give the Capitolites the gossip they crave. Now, there's several ways to do this. But you, staring at me in that room, snuggled by his side, making me jealous. You have left me with no other option." He stops for a second and inhales deeply, his dark blue hair falling over his face.

"Let me go." I tell him firmly. "I'm a Victor. People will be wondering where I am." He smiles cruelly then sighs, as if this was a great tragedy.

"I know." He replies smoothly. "Such a shame. Anyway, your only choice is to give into me now, and then I can expose you for who you are to the whole of Panem. Everyone will know your shame. You will be scandalised forever, that you cheated on your lover, your fellow Victor, Peeta Mellark." He spits his name with so much hate, that it frightens me. "How does that sound?" He asks sweetly.

"Go to hell." I tell him, spitting in his face. His eyes flash and his grip on my wrists tighten with every passing second.

"Fine." His lips attack my neck, leaving a slimy trail in its wake. I try to move, to get him away from me but he won't move. Tears fill my eyes as I think about what he said. Everyone will know who I truly am, and that thought disgusts me. When I think about Peeta, I feel sick. I don't want to do this to him, to hurt him, but I can't get him off me.

"No!" I scream, as his lips descend further down my body. "Please!" I sob, tears streaming down my face. "Let me go!" I'm begging now and I hate it. It makes me feel weak. All I want is to get away and protect myself from this horrible man.

"Get away from her." An angry voice grits out from the side of me. I try to turn my head, but I'm still pinned against the wall.

"What are you gonna do about it?" My attacker replies, staring menacingly at Peeta.

"She said no." Peeta tells him. "Where I come from, if someone says no, then they mean no." The reporter smirks.

"Well, where I come from, if someone says no, you shouldn't give up." I feel like I'm between two kinds of men, one sweet, generous and caring; the other ruthless and cruel. Suddenly without warning, his hand is grasping my blouse, then pulls. The buttons burst and scatter down the alley, making strange sounds as they clatter to the floor. I want to cross my arms over myself, protect myself from his stare. I close my eyes, completely defeated. Then I feel cold air brush over me as my attacker is pushed away from me. Peeta stands over him as he is knocked to the floor. He bends down and grasps the collar of his rumpled suit.

"If you ever come near her again, I swear I will kill you. If you report her, or say anything about this incident, I will find out. I will tear you down and make your life hell. Do you understand?" He says calmly. He is so calm, yet sterner and more frightening than I have ever seen him. His blue eyes turn from soft to piercing and he stares down the man.

"Go. I don't ever want to see your face again." Then man nods, and gets up, his face pale with fear, then stumbles away from us. I try to move but my body feels frozen. Peeta gets up, walking over to me. He doesn't touch me; he just stands a few feet away, watching me. What does that mean? Is he repulsed by the sight of me? Well, I wouldn't be surprised. I feel repulsed by me.

"Katniss." He steps forward a little, and then stops himself. Why?

"Peeta." I reply. Then my body moves all by itself. I take a step forward, but then my legs give out and I crumple to the ground. Before I can hit the grimy floor of the alley, I'm caught in his strong arms. I sigh in relief then close my eyes. I'm safe and protected in his arms. The smell of cinnamon and him envelops me. It makes me feel like I can forget everything that just happened because I'm with him and he makes everything better.

"Katniss? Are you alright? Katniss!" He shouts. I slowly open my eyes and Peeta's hovering over me, his eyes wide with panic. When he sees my eyes open he hugs me close. "Thank God. I thought you'd died on me!" I smile weakly.

"I'm not going to die on you Peeta." I say, rolling my eyes a little.

"There's the Katniss we all know and love." Peeta replies. "Do you feel you can stand up now?" I nod and he gently pulls me up till I'm standing, albeit a little shakily. He smiles, then a red flush forms on his cheeks and he pulls away from me awkwardly.

"What is it?" I ask him curiously.

"Well, erm Katniss… you're sort of, erm…" He trails off, slightly gesturing to his chest. I look down and realise that when the reporter ripped my shirt it has left me in just me underwear. I blush, and then try to wrap my shirt around me in embarrassment. Peeta sees my struggle and hands me his jacket. I smile at him gratefully and he politely inverts his eyes whilst I jip it up. Not that there's much to look at.

"Thanks Peeta." I tell him sincerely.

"It's no problem Katniss. I'd do anything for you." He tells me shyly. Normally, that should frighten me. It should make me want to run away from his affections. However, it just makes me smile. His honesty, his sincerity, it's adorable.

"Thank-you." I tell him humbly. I'm awed by his words. I don't deserve to hear them. He gently takes my face between his hands and says,

"I'm just glad I found you before…When I came back and found you missing, I swear my heart stopped. It was like the Games. Then I heard your screams and it was like all my nightmares were coming true. There are no words to describe it." He looks so haunted, so afraid that my heart breaks for him.

"I'm here." I tell him firmly. "I'm alive and you're alive. Everything's okay."

"I know." He replies. "It's just thinking about what could have happened." I pull his face down to look at me.

"Don't think about what could have happened. Focus on now." His blue eyes fix on me and he smiles gratefully.

"Thanks." He says. "I needed to hear that. Come on, let's get back to everyone, they're probably wondering what happened." He wraps a strong arm around my waist to support me and we walk out of the shadows together into the sunlight of the square. People are pacing in front of the Justice Building, Effie running her fingers through her wig. She spots us and scurries over to us, her face flushing in anger.

"Where have you been? Everyone's been looking for you! Honestly, you'd think you were both kidnapped or something!" Peeta and I glance at each other.

"Sorry Effie, we didn't mean to cause offence," Peeta replied. "Katniss and I, we needed some time alone after the interviews." Effie looks us up and down, her eyebrows rising as she takes in Peeta's jacket wrapped around me. However, she seemed to sense that now is not the time to bring it up.

"Well, let's just get in the car and head back to Victor's Village. There are still a couple of hours to go until we need to film the meeting at night so you'll have a couple of hours to do what you like." Such a strange expression. I've never had spare time. All my life I've been busy looking after my family or hunting or at school. I've never had free time. Since I've been a Victor, I've had nothing but free time on my hands and I don't really know what to do about it.

We get in the car and drive back to Victor's Village in silence. We get out of the car and Effie dismisses us with a wave, whilst tottering to my house in her heels. She shuts the door firmly. Peeta and I stood in the middle of Victor's Village with nothing to do. After a few minutes of awkward silence, Peeta asks,

"Do you want to come back to my house? We could have a hot chocolate or something. You look like you need a hot drink." I smile at him gratefully.

"Sounds nice." I reply. We walk up the steps to Peeta's house when I realise I've never properly been in his house before. I have once, when the prep team dressed me for the first day of filming. His house is nearly the exact same as mine, with the furniture in the same place. The only thing different about it is that it feels so lived in. We've only been back about a week, and yet Peeta's house feels like home. It feels normal to sit at his kitchen table, while he makes hot chocolate. It feels normal to make light conversation and for it not to feel awkward. I can't tell what my feelings are yet, but I do know that I feel happy and safe in his company. I like the feeling of Peeta's jacket around my body. But then I realise the reason why it's there. Now I want nothing more than to wash that reporter's slimy kiss off my body.

"Peeta?" I ask. "Can I use your shower?" Peeta's head snaps up to look at me. He visibly swallows before he answers.

"Erm…Sure, you can if you want." I frown at him quizzically.

"I just want to forget about everything from today, I feel like a shower would help."

"Yes, of course." He replies. "Take as long as you need."

"Thanks." I say quietly, leaving the room. I head up the stairs to where I know the bathroom will be. I make sure that the door is shut, and then strip myself of my clothes. I want to chuck away what remains of them. Maybe that would be better, help me move on from today's events. I remember Peeta's strange expression when I asked him about showering. What was that about? How he confuses me. Everytime I think I have him worked out, he does or says something that makes me realise how little I know him. We may have been through the most traumatic experiences together, yet in everyday life, I know nearly nothing. I only know inconsequential things, like how his hair shines in the sunlight, the way his strong arms can wrap protectively around my waist. I don't even know his favourite colour! I sigh to myself and decide to focus on other things. Tonight's filming will resume soon, since it's getting dark already. My stomach rumbles and I realise that I haven't eaten anything since breakfast. Maybe I'd better ask Peeta if he has anything I could eat. That's a stupid thing to think, since Peeta's a baker. Of course he'll have something edible to eat. I laugh a little, then continue to lather shampoo through my hair. It got all tangled and dirty earlier. Like I've said before, I'm not used to having my hair down, as it's normally in a braid. However, the cameras like it down, so my hair is usually flowing down my back. I push my head under the shower, running my hands through my hair to wash away all the suds. They swirl down the drain in a circular motion which I'd never noticed before. The notion fascinates me. I find myself staring at the drain in silence. The luxuries of my new life continue to amaze me. You really do learn something new every day, I find myself thinking. I step out of the shower and wrap a fluffy towel around me. I look for my clothes, then realise I have none. Oops. I cautiously walk out onto the landing and call downstairs.

"Peeta, do you have any clothes? Obviously mine are all dirty and…you know."

"What was that?" Peeta shouts back. "I didn't hear what you said. Give me a second and I'll be up."

"No!" I shout back in a panicked voice. "You don't need to come up…" Then suddenly he appears in front of me and I jump a little, clutching my towel tightly to my body.

"Katniss, you're not dressed!" Peeta sounds surprised and I see his cheeks flush a little.

"I know." I say, rolling my eyes. "That's what I was asking you for."

"Right." Peeta replies, heading into his room. I hear him rummaging around in drawers. "Give me a minute." The sound continues then he comes out, a small pile in his arms. "I don't really know what'll fit. I mean, you're tiny and I'm…not. Try whatever you want, you never know." He smiles awkwardly then bundles the clothes into my arms. I catch them, whilst trying to keep the towel on my body. Peeta practically runs downstairs, telling me he'll make some food for me. Right. That's just an excuse not to see my body. I don't really blame him. I'm too slim from starving all my life, the Games did nothing to help that either. I may be strong, but any curves I may have had were stolen from me before I could even claim them. Seam girls used to be jealous of Merchant girls, for they had curves where Seam girls did not. Merchant girls had flowing, shiny hair, whilst Seam girls had dark and greasy hair, for the luckier ones only had a bath once a week. I never used to be one of the Seam girls who envied the others, for my physical appearance didn't bother me. I only cared about keeping us alive and making sure that we were presentable to escape the horror of the Community Home. However, now I find that it bothers me. I blame the Capitol. Their obsession with appearance is starting to rub off and me, and I can't tell whether that's a good thing or not. I try on the majority of the clothes Peeta handed to me, before I decide on a t-shirt that doesn't drown me, and a pair of soft cotton bottoms. I think they're supposed to be pyjamas but oh well. They'll do for now. I roll up the bottoms on the trousers because they are so long, I know I'd trip in them if I tried to walk in them. I shuffle slowly down the stairs and into his kitchen because I can smell food cooking. I sit down at the table and Peeta stands up from taking something out of the oven. It looks like roasted wild dog meat, but smells loads better.

"You took a long time." He comments, swiftly cutting the meat with such precision, you'd think he'd done it a million times before. "Are you okay?" I smile a little at his concern. I'm not used to people looking after me.

"I'm fine." I say quietly. "A little shaken, but I'll soldier on. I have to, for my family's sake." Peeta places a steaming plate in front of me. It's the unknown meat with potatoes and vegetables, covered in gravy.

"Stupid question." Peeta says, shaking his head. I go to devour the delicious-smelling meal and his hand stops me. I stare at him questioningly. Why would he stop me eating? "Go slowly Katniss. It's hot." I frown at him. It doesn't change anything. I shrug rebelliously then spoon in a big mouthful. I swallow it then choke a little, my eyes streaming. Peeta raises his eyebrows, waiting with a smug look on his face.

"Okay, you win." I splutter in defeat. His smug smile grows even more, till it practically takes over his face.

"I told you so!" He chuckles, eating his own food. I smile at his childish manner then resume eating. I take a bite of the meat and my head tips back in satisfaction.

"Wow, this is amazing," I mumble. "What is it?" Peeta looks at me strangely.

"Haven't you ever tried beef before?"

"I don't think so." I murmur, trying to recall if I ever had anything as tantalising as this. "I thought it was wild dog meat because it looks like this, but nothing has ever tasted as good as this. Except maybe lamb stew!" I laugh, remembering the little dish of heaven from the Capitol. That was one of the only things I ever liked about the Capitol; its food was excellent. I look down and realise that my plate is completely empty.

"Well, I'm glad you enjoyed it." Peeta replies, picking up my plate and taking it over to the sink. He begins to wash up the dirty pots, and I find myself rushing to help him. We clean the kitchen in silence but it's not awkward. There's a smart knock at the door and Effie walks in.

"Good, I thought I'd find you two here. You're wanted on set. Spit spot!" She smiles, then marches right out, leaving the front door open. I stare at Peeta in a panic. I can't face the cameras. I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't do this. In an instant, he's there. I'm wrapped in his arms. I bury my face into his chest, letting his strength become mine. For a split second, it works. For a second, I'm happy and peaceful. He breaks the silence with his voice, low and reassuring.

"You can do this Katniss. You're strong and amazing. I believe in you." His words resonate within me. They give me the strength to carry on.

"Okay." I whisper. We leave the house together and go into mine. We are quickly briefed on what to do. The want to make it so that we are so desperate to see each other, to be together, that we are prepared to do anything for each other. When we filmed the dinner scene, Peeta was given a note to give to me. Then I head to head up to my bedroom to begin filming. I sit in my bed and take a deep breath. I can do this.

I open up Peeta's note, crinkled from being held for so long. It reads Katniss, my darling. I cannot be without you. I simply can't bear the thought of you not with me, not in my arms. I worry about you when I don't see you, for I can't protect you. So, with that as my excuse, may I meet you tonight? Meet me between my house and yours. I'd wait for you all night if I had to.

Your love,

Peeta xxx

In spite of me knowing I'm on film, I can't help but smile. His words, exaggerated as they are, still have a hidden meaning. I clutch the note close to my heart and smile.

"I must go to him." I say to the camera. I get into bed and close my eyes, waiting until my mother and Prim go to bed. In reality, I only have to lie here for a few seconds; the camera crew will edit the rest. I sneak downstairs, with the camera's following my every move. I pause outside my mother's room and move extra slowly. In reality, she's downstairs. I fucking hate acting, I think grimly. Why can't we film our real lives? But then I wouldn't want that either. Too invasive of privacy. I carry on out of the door only in my pyjamas, wishing I'd stopped to put on a coat. Then I see Peeta, his silhouette highlighted by the dim porch light nearby.

"Peeta!" I breathe, and he envelops me in his arms.

"My love." He returns, burying his face in my hair. I continue to hang off him like a monkey for a few minutes, until we eventually break apart. We are far away enough to have space between us, but we stand closer than friends would.

"I missed you." I tell him, sticking to the script. Lato doesn't mind when we say something different, since he reckons that feels normal and natural. I however, consistently struggle with what to say, so I find it easier to say what I'm supposed to.

"I missed you too." He replies. "I need you like the world needs the sun. I need you like I need air to breathe. You are everything to me."

"Peeta," I gasp. "You put my feelings into words. When I don't know what to say, you are always there. You mean more to me, more than words can ever say." I recite my lines, trying to inspire passion into my voice. Peeta says no more, he wraps his arms around me and kisses me. We kiss for a long time and I move my hands to his hair. All the while, I'm thinking about how much I hate this. Not kissing Peeta, but acting. I feel like a liar. All I want to do is push him away, run to the woods and hide. No-one, nothing around me, and then my life would be perfect. I wouldn't have to worry about my family, about Peeta and Gale, about anything at all. I'd be as free as bird, free to dance and soar in the sky, away from the prison that is my life. I'm brought out of my musing by Peeta. He is one of the only spots of light in this world. He makes being in my prison better. Gazing into his eyes, I can forget my troubles, for they fade and swirl in his cerulean pools. I smile at him softly. I must play my part. We all must do. For we, Victors of the Hunger Games, people in the districts, we are nothing but part of the machine. Cogs, whirling and turning under the hands of President Snow. I hear the sounds of "Cut!" and break apart from Peeta, yet at the same time, I do not feel anything. I am sick and tired of this life, of living like a liar, and yet I cannot break free from it anymore than anyone else.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this! Anyone notice the Mary Poppins reference I put in there? (Wink) Sorry this is two weeks yet, but I didn't have any new ideas. Since this story needs moving on a little bit, there'll be a little time jump in the next chapter. I don't want to do this but I'll have to, otherwise it'll be chapter 500 knowing me by the time we get to Catching Fire events. Please review this, I can never tell you guys how much it means to me to get a review, good or bad. I welcome everything! So please review!

Love,

Mjenney21 xxx