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The Longest Road
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~Chapter 20. The whispers~
It started with an almost imperceptible twitch of the monster's hands, when he stopped eating and lowered his head slowly until his chin rested on his chest. His arms drooped, and the bit of a poorly cooked tempura slipped from between his fingers.
Matsuri assessed him from the corner of her eye, careful to pretend she was still staring at the small camp-fire, which was placed near the mouth of the cave. She chewed on tempura, which she had to make for the two of them before. The food seemed to grow in her throat, almost choking her.
His lips moving ever so slightly, the redhead seemed to mutter something to himself. His fingers were clenching and opening in a tardy motion, as if he tried to grab something that wasn't there, and the muscles in his exposed neck visibly tensed.
Hardly swallowing the food, the girl sipped the water, still faking her great interest in the dancing flames. It seemed to her he wouldn't notice even if she looked straight at him, but she couldn't risk being caught. He hated being stared at, and she didn't want to anger him.
Matsuri almost jumped when the monster's palm snapped up, grasping the fistful of his hair. Her heart pounded against her sternum, but she managed to stifle the surprised gasp, which threatened to escape her lips. He still didn't seem to pay any attention to her, though. With one of his hands clutching to his hair tightly as if he tried to rip his scalp off, he hissed through the clenched teeth.
"Yes," he murmured almost inaudibly. "Yes, mother."
Matsuri gulped, her hand trembling, as she took another bit of tempura from her bowl. She tried to eat it but her mouth was too dry. The girl decided she couldn't risk choking, so she slowly put the food back into the bowl, and took another draught of water.
The monster's body suddenly quaked, as if he was feverish. Shaking his head, he raised his other hand and pressed his palms against his temples. The quaking gradually stopped, but his breathing hitched, as he started talking to himself again. "Yes. Yes. Of course, mother. I'm—" He groaned painfully.
Matsuri watched him with unconcealed fear but he was obviously too busy with whatever was going on with him to mind her gaping. He groaned again, louder this time, his knuckles whitening when he tried to dug his fingertips into his skull.
"That's right, mother," he recited between gasps. "I am always a good boy, I am—" He nodded vehemently. "Yes, mother! Yes!" he whimpered, drawing in the sharp breath, and still nodding as if eager to please the 'mother' by any means.
Horrified, the girl dropped all pretences, and crawled back, her eyes sticking to the redhead. She thought she knew who he was talking to, but the realization only added to her panic. She had no idea why he called the demon his mother, but it was just him. Insanity personified. He had no reason. He needed no reason.
With a yelp of an apparent pain, the monster leaned forward, releasing his head and pressing his palms against the sandy floor. Shivering, he panted and sobbed, occasionally whispering some words to himself, or to his 'mother', most likely. The spit streaked down from his mouth, leaving wet marks on the sand.
Matsuri shifted towards the entrance, wondering if he would be mad at her later that she saw him in such pathetic condition. She decided she would run if the sand demon started taking over, hoping she would have enough time to escape. It didn't seem to be the case, though. The monster was still in a human form, even if he was everything but human.
Matsuri blenched and cried softly, when the redhead screamed in a high pitched voice, the voice she had never heard from him before. Gripping his head again, he uttered some unintelligible noises, and straightened a bit, so she could see a glimpse of his face.
That face, usually daunting and dreadful, was now contorted in pain. His eyes were screwed shut, his bared teeth clenching so forcefully that she could see the muscles in his jaw working, the veins stood out in his brow and neck, and the drops of sweat were covering his pale skin.
Apparently, pain didn't even begin to describe it.
The girl couldn't help but watch him with a mix of a sick fascination, fear and something what would be a deep sympathy, if it was about someone else. She watched as he begged and wailed, writhed and trembled, and when a single tiny tear slipped from between his eyelashes, Matsuri found herself momentarily wondering if there wasn't something human left in him, after all.
All her thoughts gone in a flash, she leaned backwards rapidly when his eyes snapped open, his insane gaze searching frantically across the cave, as if looking for something he could cling to. Eventually, he spotted her and their gazes met. Matsuri jumped to her feet at the defenseless and pleading look in his eyes, and dashed towards the exit as if all the nine bijū were chasing her, because nothing she had suffered from him before was just as terrifying as the thought that Sabaku no Gaara might be seeking comfort in her.
The end of chapter 20.
The next chapter: Sated