Chapter 21

The past comes back to haunt me

WARNING: YOU WILL NOT BE PREPARED FOR THIS. READ WITH CAUTION…

So remember I said, I'd take those opportunities to shock you? Well here's one of them, but in order for you to fully understand my past, and what Declan and Adam hold over me, we're going to have to go back a few years…

4 years Earlier…

"Way to go we're both going to be teaching at Degrassi." Adam smiled chinging the celebration glass. 'Can't believe all that hard work paid off. Now tons of college honeys are going to be begging to take a ride on the Adam track." I laughed to myself. "Mr Torez,that's like every girls fantasy" I returned with a smirk and a sarcastic comment.

"There's only one girl I want to try to impress tonight" I sighed reaching for my leather jacket. "Are you ever going to tell me who she is?" I laughed to myself. "She's not someone you'd ever see me with. She's a college freshmen and …"

"Alright well, just be safe and don't stay out too late. After all it's a school night." Adam teased. I rolled my eyes. "I'll be home by 10 Dad" I snickered to myself, and went out the door.

"Guess who?" A child like move on my part, putting my hands over her eyes. "Could it be my boyfriend, Eli Goldsworthy?" She smiled, pulling on her soft ash brown ringlet curls. "Can I get you a drink?" She laughed to herself, and reached into her purse.

"I can buy myself a drink, but I won't because I have to drive tonight." I smiled, as she reached her hand out to mine. "But thanks for meeting me here, there's something I need to talk to you about…" She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, as she nervously fidgeted with her water glass.

"Eli…I'm not 20. I'm 16,if we're going to continue this relationship. I need to be honest with you." I laughed to myself.

"Seriously, cause you act so mature for your age." She smiled, seeing it didn't bother me. I mean it didn't, because it wasn't like she was my student. "So Mother is going to be moving us here to stay, or just until I finish high school. I'm glad this doesn't change anything, because I really like you, Eli." She placed a chaste kiss on my cheek, leaving me to blush. I cleared my throat. "Well we better wrap this up" I stared at the half eaten plate of food, thinking to myself I slept with an underage girl. This is so wrong, but I don't care.

"See you later" She giggled. "Walk me out?" She requested. I opened my wallet to pay the check, but she just winked and said... "Taken care, kind of a thank you dinner for last night" Hmm back to my original thought. I slept with an underage girl…

She laughed as we walked to her car. She wrapped her arms around my neck, and leaned in for a passionate kiss. "Well I'll call you later" I broke from it. That was really hard to, in every sense of the word. She was a really good kisser.

I found myself getting caught up in it, ignoring the text on my phone. An incoming text from Ellie my ex. Our tongues untangled and she got in her car. "Well it's a good night,school tomorrow. Degrassi! Here I come" I gulped. "Degrassi?" I questioned, but her windows were rolled up and she was blowing me a kiss goodbye,as she backed out of the parking space and headed home.

"Wow Eli, you're going to hell for this one" I kicked a rock in the parking lot and went for my car.

Nice memory,huh? Well here's another one of those shocking moments. The entire time Adam was with Fiona…so was I, thing is I didn't know she was with Adam, until I caught them kissing the night of that party. Did you really believe, that I met her at a party and just hooked up with her? Sometimes good guys do bad things… I actually met her at a poetry reading the summer before my last year of teacher's college. Yah,well back to my past...

Here's another memory… "Hey Eli" Fiona smiled, walking out my bed wrapping herself in a sheet. I brushed my teeth smirking. I'm sleeping with my student, and I know it. I didn't care though. "So, I know things have been crazy. I mean I didn't sign on for an exclusive relationship. I can't help if I like to mingle." She confessed. I rolled my eyes. "and sleep around" I muttered, spitting my left over paste into the sink.

"I want you to take time and chose who you want to be with, because I'm sick of being the last guy you call. You have Adam, and a fling with KC,and Fitz, and Declan" I said in an outrage,like a jealous boyfriend,cause well I was.

"Fitz is just a friend, and please don't believe those rumors that I'm with my brother, cause because truthfully I think he's gay,and you're starting to get jealous Mr Goldsworthy." I laughed. It was impossible to stay mad at this girl. "This is wrong" I tried to keep her from kissing me. I had no self control, though. "Shit!" Fiona stopped out of nowhere. "My brothers home, you have to hide, hurry!" She pushed me into her closet. "Hey Fi, Can I borrow your phone? I need to call tech support…whoa" Her brother stopped looking around the room.

"You have a guy here?" He asked. Fiona kept the sheet around herself. "Seriously Fi you're turning into a slut. Where is he? " Her brother got unruly, and started going through the room.

"Declan, please don't over react" She tried to calm him down, but his hand hit the door of her closet. He snickered to himself, as he opened the door.

"Fiona you're sleeping with your teacher!" He said in a menacing tone,stareing at me half naked in her closet. "I was just leaving" The only words that I could think of, grabbing my clothes and running out without a shirt on.

"You damn right, leave!" I ran through the echo's of her brother swearing at me from the top of their very large stair case.

Fiona and I continued to see each other, even though she was dating Adam. Adam was falling in love with her. I was too. I told her she had to choose. "Don't make me do that, Eli" I walked out knowing she chose Adam. I was fine with that just wanted her to be happy. "Eli, there's something I have to tell you. I already told my brother. He's really angry about it. Eli, I'm pregnant, and it's yours." My heart dropped into my stomach.

"What?" "Get an abortion, this will ruin everything!" I yelled out of anger. "No" She refused, and I pulled her against the wall. "Don't say no, just do it! Please" I tightened my grip on her wrist.

"No, Eli. I'm too far along anyway." I screamed. I swore and went to my car blazing mad.

That didn't seem to change things. In that time, Adam never found out,probably because Fiona took a surprise 6 month trip to Europe. Declan watched me closely. That brings me to the night of the dance. The year end dance.

Fiona had returned from Europe after giving birth to our son. I was chaperoning that night. Fiona and I were in the hallway and we got into a fight. She walked off mad. Declan corned me in the school highway with a knife, threatening my life. He didn't hurt me though, he just stabbed the wall. As you know, already.

Well here we are, the night Fiona died. Adam caught her on her eighteenth birthday making out with Declan's friend KC. She and I argued about the baby, and how she was going to give the child to Declan, and say it was his, so I wouldn't get in trouble. Fitz spiked the punch, and Drew, Adam's brother got hurt, so bad that he had to give up sports. Somewhere in there this happened.

"You cheated" I said waiting for her to respond. "No, Eli I told you we had an open relationship" She insisted downing a bottle of champagne. "You said you were getting help for that" I pried the bottle out of her hands. "You can't tell me what to do, you're not my father, you're not my brother. And you're not my boyfriend anymore." I rolled my eyes. "So what if we're over? I won't let Declan take my son." She rolled her eyes at my comment.

"We're still going to let you visit him. Eli please with the help of nannies, and Declan our life won't be tarnished." I reached out to hug her. "Don't touch me, please' Her eyes sparkled such sadness as she dropped the glass bottle on the ground, and it smashed into pieces.

"I need to know something Eli, because I'm going to tell you something." The way people express things they wouldn't is when they're drunk. Just for future reference.

"I love you Eli. I'm in love with you. I have been for a year now. I love you too much for your life to get ruined by something we did." She wiped a tear from her eyes.

"I'm going to break up with Adam tonight. I waited till my 18th birthday, so I could be with you." I smiled at that, but it was not the easiest thing to take in. "Fiona, I've moved on. I'm seeing Ellie" All she wanted was a stupid I love you. But I couldn't even give her that!

She wiped her tears, crashing her lips onto mine. "Then I won't bother you again, Eli" She walked in the direction of her car, stopping in the middle of the road. "Fiona Wait!" I should of said. I love you too. I should of stopped her.

She shook her head at me, and walked towards the bench in front of the street lights. I returned to the party, thinking about what I was going to say. When I finally decided to tell her how I felt, it was too late. "Fiona!" I called out, as she was walking across the street.

"I …" I was cut off by a speeding car coming towards us. "Fiona watch out!" I tried to push her out of the way, but the car clipped her and sped off. I knelt next to her, trying to get her to respond. I watched her die,knowing there was nothing I could do. That's when I yelled for help, and Adam crowded around her." Somebody help!" The look on everyone's face said. This is all your fault and you know what? It was.

Declan surprised me the next morning showing up at my door with a file. A background search. He laughed to himself. "Mr. Gold rod, I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that you pay for my sister's death." His tone was not friendly. It was scary.

"I didn't do anything." He shook his head at me. "You killed her for the money" He breathed evilly. "No, I loved her. I would never do anything to hurt her." Declan pressed the file against my chest.

"you owe a loan shark 200,000 dollars. Hence why you're under the alias Goldsworthy."

I rolled my eyes. "What was that for drugs, Eli? Cause you've been arrested for coke possession twice, as well as marijuana,e,and oh and you have about a dozen DUI's" He listed things off like a chart. "Also care to explain this,this letter that is offering you the amount of money you owe,in exchange for my life?" I shook my head. "I was never going to do anything of that sort" I defended. "I know my biggest enemy would love my head in a trophy case,but that doesn't mean you can kill me for cash." He grabbed my collar.

"You know Fiona listed if anything were to happen to her,that she left all assets that she was to come into at 18, to her son and brother, and her friend Eli…hmm friend. Surprise she died on her 18th birthday. That sure seems like a coincidence, doesn't it Goldsworthy?" What was he implying?

I shook my head. "I never told her. I owed anyone anything. I had no idea about that, or anything left to you or anyone else!. Where we're you during the party?" Declan laughed manically,not even careing I implied he killed his sister,which I was pretty sure of. "She may have been a slut,but there was no reason to kill her. You'll pay for it, in more than just money" He walked out of my apartment, and I shut the door and broke down crying.

"Hey Eli" Ellie walked over to me, carrying a box of my t-shirts. "yah" I tried to fight the tears. "Hey Eli, you cheating bastird. We are over!" She dumped the box of t-shirts on me ."How could you upset the order of them! They must be red,black,gray!" I yelled and scattered around.

"Because I knew it would upset you" I grabbed her and threw her against the wall. "You little bitch,get out of my apartment" I tried to get my shirts back in order, only to find she had ripped each and everyone of them. I screamed, and I could hear her laughing outside the door.

So it's gets better... At this time, Adam was my room mate. I went through his droors trying to find a glue stick, something I could put my shirts back together with, that's when I stumbled across an engagement ring. "Fiona Adam=Forever" Wow, shocking isn't it?

So where we're we?

Clare and I walked into my apartment. She made herself comfy on the couch. The whole ride was pretty silent,and I tried to dodge all her questions.

"Clare, I…" I had to get rid of this silence. She stared at me her arms crossed. "I'm not ready to tell you" She rolled her eyes. "I wonder about some things Eli. Like why your room is perfectly organized, and color coded. Why you labeled everything, including your laundry…" I shook my head.

"This is must worse, than being a maniac with over compulsive disorder… Clare my name is not Elijah Goldsworthy. It's Gold Rod. I um have kind of been hiding trying to pay back a loan shark, whom I borrowed a lot of money from…" She gasped. "What? You're in hiding?" She asked out of disbelief.

I nodded, as I squeezed the sleeves of my hoodie. She looked at me shocking. "Even though Adam tried to kill you today Clare. I don't think he's the one trying to kill you." I gulped, as I picked up the text from my phone.

"Roses are red, so is blood. Money is green, and so is someone who can't breathe-In for the kill" I tried to hold my composure, but instead fell onto the sofa, nearly collapsing. "Edwards,I'm going to do everything I can to keep you safe." She shook her head at me. "I can keep myself safe,because you haven't been doing a very good job of it" She grabbed her jacket and went out my door.

To be continued…

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