Okay… so it took me two nights to get this second chapter posted. Sorry! Either ff or my internet wasn't cooperating last night.

Beautiful Goodbye by Richard Marx, If You Leave by Orchestral Menoervres in the Dark, and Daylight by Maroon 5 are the songs for this chapter.

I added a song list that will take us into the second half of the story - at the end of this post, if you're interested.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight and this is slash!

Ch. 21 – I'll Be Loving You

Jpov

He gazes back at me with his mouth open slightly, attempting to contain each gasping breath he takes. Reaching up, he ghosts his fingers down my face, across my lips - silently begging for me with his impassioned gaze.

I can't deny him or myself any longer; the worshipping of his body begins now, with my lips placed softly on a pebbled nipple. It hardens further once I'm latched on, causing him to moan and writhe. This feels so fucking good, yet I tear myself away to move down below the covers, following the sprinkling of hair that will lead me to what my mouth waters for most of all. Fuck, the thought of his dick in my mouth makes mine harden impossibly further.

Almost there… but just before I make it to my destination, Edward pulls me, positioning me so that we can taste one another at the same time. He licks around the sensitive head of my cock causing me to moan around his. I take him deep within my mouth in one swift motion. The feeling of him sucking me while I suck him is overwhelming; my senses are on immediate overload. The vibrations from his moans travelling along my sensitive length are enough to send me over the edge right now. Factor in the feel of his mouth on me – so hot, so wet. His tongue perfectly messages up and down every inch while he sucks me in the most decadent way. I feel my balls drawing up closer to my body, the burning in my loins beginning.

I pull out of his grasp, my sensitive dick slipping from between his lips to slap against my stomach. Edward whines in frustration, latching on to me with strength I often forget he possesses. He swiftly pins me below him and sucks my cock back into his hot mouth. Bobbing his head relentlessly, he stops only long enough to command me to, "Let go, baby… let it go!"

Pumping my shaft within his tight fist, his lips meet my throbbing flesh, again. I have no choice but to obey him, to let go all over his perfect lips, in his open mouth, on his extended tongue. He laps at the head of my cock as it empties for him.

I am weightless, lost in a euphoria I've rarely felt, even with him. So good. So fucking good.

He crawls up my body to join me lying cockeyed on the bed, so that our heads are toward the bottom of the bed, but not quite. With the quilts crumpled around us, Edward holds me for long moments while I gradually descend from my high. In complete contrast to me, he remains abuzz with sensations, awaiting the climax he desperately needs. When my trembling finally subsides, my breathing returns to normal, I realize how hard his cock is against my thigh. In a perpetual state of arousal, he waits for me to give him what he's given me.

"Does it hurt, baby?" A strange mix of desire and concern are evident in my voice.

Confused for just a moment, he catches on when he sees the gleam in my eye. He grinds his hard cock along my leg, causing mine to swell again, already. Fuck, the things this boy does to me, his effect on me… he makes my body sing. Over and over again, constantly ready, he makes me hard for him, always.

He takes labored breaths, now full-on thrusting himself against me, his words come out more like pants and grunts. "Yes… it hurts so good. I know, the more I ache, the better it will feel in the end, but please… Jasper. I need you. Now. It's time, or I'll cum before you fuck me."

Oh, I won't let that happen… almost, baby.

"Hold on, baby. Let me take care of you."

I kiss him, hard. Possessively. I can taste my own cum on his tongue and in the recesses of his mouth, causing me to growl… I fucking growl at the decadence of the two of us together like this. So sexy.

It's time to focus solely on him, what I meant to do before - time to fuck him until he can't remember his own name, and will never forget mine.

I tear my lips from his, as hard as it is to do so. My mouth demands access to a different part of his body, longing for him in the most intimate way. I need to taste him… there.

I move down his body, attempting to pace myself by laying tender kisses on his chest and stomach along the way. He's writhing and thrashing around by the time I make it to his beautiful cock, so engorged for me it's purple. I hold him down and blow on its tip, sending him bucking up off the bed and groaning my name, once again exerting his strength, refusing to be held still. He cups my cheek, urging my mouth to where he so badly needs it to be, but I bypass his erection and the mouth-watering stream of pre-cum dribbling from its tip.

I spread his legs, opening him up for me. The sight of him like this shoots fire through my veins. Of lust, a sirens call to join my body with his in the most primal way. Of love and appreciation, because I know he lets his guard down and gives himself to no one else like this. Just me. Not even her. Never her. Just me. I'm the only one who will ever see him like this.

"Jasper! Please? I need something… anything!"

His pleas pull me from my haze. I finally take his cock in my hand, keeping my grip loose; it fucking jumps at the first feel of my fist's embrace. He moans with every slick pass I make, expelling noises of wonton pleasure when my tongue laps his entrance. I ready him for the intrusion of my body. It's been a while; months. He's so tight. I don't want to hurt him. He always loves the feeling of my cock stretching his hole, obviously finding pleasure in the initial pain of our union, grounding him to the act we commit, together as one. I'm sure this time will be no different - yet, I force myself to take my time, first by licking his hole and pushing my tongue inside him. Then with my fingers, pushing in and turning, seeking and then finding the spot I know will make my responsive boy lift off the bed. He does not disappoint, unable to control his body, though he attempts to stay grounded by grasping at the sheets.

"Please, Jasper… Please!"

He begs for me, spreading his legs further. He's beautiful like this, asking for me this one last time. It takes every ounce of control I possess to not take him roughly and immediately with no condom or lube. I doubt he would protest, but reason wins out. Maybe in a different life, if we were pledging ourselves to one another, to only ever one another again. But we're not. We're in no position to share ourselves in that way, so I pull myself away, though it pains me to do so. I find my jeans by the fireplace and take out the condoms and lube packets I stashed in my pocket, in hopes we'd get this time together tonight. I guess I knew we would. I knew this would happen. I knew our night would lead to this. It had to be.

I kneel between his legs; he watches intently, licking his lips and breathless at the sight of me sheathing myself for him. He can't contain his moans when my slick fingers work lube into his ass. We lock gazes, of one mind and of one heart, holding our breaths as I line myself up. The tip of my cock is at his entrance, barely nudging inside. He nods his head, giving his permission for me to push forward, so I do. The unearthly growl I hear surprises me, because it is me. I have no control over the noises ripping from somewhere deep inside my soul, as I breach his ring of tight muscles and seat myself deep inside him. Finally, I'm enveloped within his heat.

His body perfectly covets mine - all of my long, thick cock. So deep. So right.

I take him. And he takes me right back.

I fall into his arms and we both hold on, just like this, as if we'll never let go. I wish we didn't have to.

We kiss. We murmur reassurances only he and I could ever understand. I don't know how long we're like this – him holding me in his arms while I gently, barely move inside him, making love. Every push and pull is sweet torture. Every grind is delicious pain. The ecstasy we share is almost unbearable, rivalled only by our inner need to treasure every second.

I hold off the orgasm already threatening to consume me. My need to be joined with him like this for as long as possible takes precedence.

Many minutes, maybe hours - we make love until we're both wound so tight, we'll surely burst into flames, burning down everything around us, if we don't let go soon.

We both near our end; the waiting is over. Edward has held out impossibly long, considering he hasn't cum all night. His cock has been nestled between our moving bodies, messaged by our stomachs this entire time. I take one last taste of his kiss-swollen lips before sitting back on my ankles, between his legs. Holding his hands in each of mine, I twine my fingers with his between us. Using our arms as leverage, I begin plunging into him hard and fast.

I barely hang on to the edge, my orgasm already in its beginning stages – yet somehow I do, until I see the first stream of cum spray from Edward's bouncing cock. His eyes are on mine, as always, dark and fervent. He does not look away the entire time his cock jerks and empties onto his stomach. Barely a hoarse sound escapes him, though his mouth is open as if he's screaming. His back lifts up off the bed as his body flexes and tenses and pulls up toward me. I don't relent. I keep fucking him, making love to him, pounding him into the mattress - I prolong his ecstasy impossibly long.

He is exquisite, falling apart for me. I'm mesmerized, watching his pleasure free him - pleasure he's experiencing because of me.

My orgasm finally, inevitably crashes through me as Edward falls back on the bed, exhausted and spent. His body is loose and relaxed; I continue to grip his slim hips, thrusting into his tight ass, my climax as long and intense as his was. I'm more vocal, grunting and groaning with each spasm of my cock as it empties into the condom, deep inside him.

I collapse, wrapped up in him, with him. We hold and caress, languidly kissing, then kissing some more. We lie beside each other, gazing - unable to look away until dawn is upon us, threatening to shed its unwelcome light.

When his voice invades the beautiful silence, it sounds shaky and laced with too much sadness to hide away.

"I'll miss you."

Mine is just as frail, tired from the battle we've been waging, and already beat down by the journey I face.

"I'll miss you, too. Every day. But I'll be okay as long as I know you are. Be happy, Edward. Please? Have a happy life?"

He shakes his head, refusing my request as one lone tear escapes his sad eyes.

"Please, baby… for me, try to be happy?" My voice rings far too desperate, but I don't care. If he can be happy, then I might have a chance.

"I'll try."

He'll try. I'll have to live with that.

"You could stay?" he whispers, so quietly I can barely make out his words, but I see into his soul. I know he knows I can't stay. That I won't, and that I shouldn't.

"You could come with me?" I whisper back.

He gasps at my suggestion, eyes wide and searching mine, questioning if it's possible. Is there a way? But too soon, the momentary hope fades from his face, the light I temporarily glimpsed in his blue depths disappears, like a wick of a candle trying to ignite, but barely flickering before burning out, instead. He relaxes back onto his pillow, barely shaking his head.

No. I knew that. But I had to ask.

He can't come with me.

He won't.

I reverently touch his face, smoothing away the frown lines that dare mare his beautiful features, and I take a deep breath…

"I love you, Edward. I should've admitted it to myself long ago. I should've told you so many times… I love you."

He places one chaste kiss on my open lips, before telling me what I so desperately need to hear.

"I know baby. It's okay. And I hope you know… you have to know… that I love you, too. So much. Enough to let you go. It's the only reason I can."

With those last words, we kiss goodbye, our lips and tongues attempting to caress away the pain. They can't, of course – with each pass of his tongue against mine, the hole inside me only deepens.

He lays his head on the pillow beside me and we face one another, simply holding and watching. As dawn begins to alight the room, Edward's eyelids flutter. I witness him give up his fight to stay awake. I watch as his body relaxes when sleep claims him. I lie beside him, silently crying like a baby. For I know, I will never again look into his eyes. I'll never again see through the blue to his soul.

Goodbye, my love… goodbye.

When I'm sure he is sleeping deeply, I slip from his embrace and get dressed. I add a few logs to the fire and send a text message to Alice, letting her know where Edward is and that he'll need a ride home when he wakes up.

I stand by the bed, watching him for just a few minutes more. Each second is sweet torture, tempting me to crawl back under the covers, to give up my attempts to do the right thing.

But somehow, I find the courage to walk out the door - to get in my car and point the damned thing south on the highway. I don't know what is in store for me. I can only hope the passage of time will ease the searing pain coursing through me, and that I'll eventually learn how to live without my heart.

EPov

I'm dreaming of a place in which I've never been… in a park, in a city, I think. The sun is shining. It feels so good, so warm.

I know I must be dreaming because I'm happy. I feel free, for once.

Someone is walking beside me, and that someone is holding my hand. When I turn my head to see who it is, I see that it's Jasper. Of course.

I knew it was him all along. My heart knew.

He looks older; he's a man, no longer the boy I know so well. His body is filled out into quite the impressive muscular frame and his features are slightly more mature. He's beautiful and happy and carefree in a way I've never seen him. He smiles at me… a smile that lights up his entire face - and spans the short distance between us, causing warmth and contentment to bloom in my chest. It spreads through me until it touches everything.

Until, I look away. For just a second, I look away. When I look back, he is gone. I am alone. My hand feels empty, my heart feels empty. My life is empty.

But the promise of him remains.

Suddenly I open my eyes. I'm in his bed, in his cottage, but he is no longer beside me.

Jasper is gone. I feel his absence like a knife through my heart, causing me to abruptly sit up from the pain of it. I squint into the dim corners of the room, praying he'll emerge, but I know he won't. He's already far away. He has never felt so far away. The distance between us takes my breath away, literally. I can't fucking breathe. Yet, somehow I do, and I will.

It hurts even more that he didn't say goodbye, but I knew he wouldn't. He couldn't. Neither could I. He would've ended up staying, or I would've ended up going. As much as it sucks, neither of those scenarios are what he needs or deserves. He deserves so much more than me, and my bullshit, and all of my baggage. He deserves so much more than staying here as my secret, or having me torn away from him there once my father tracks us down. And my father would do just that. He so fucking would.

No. I did the right thing by letting Jasper go. I know I did.

So, why do I feel as if I've just made the biggest mistake of my life?

It doesn't matter. I must live the life they've laid out for me.

Just, not yet. I'll lie here, in this little cottage bed, for just a little while longer. Where his scent still invades my senses. Where I can continue to feel his lips on my skin, his hands branding me. I'll lie here and savor the ache he left behind, the delicious discomfort assuring me it really did happen. He happened, he fucked me. Jasper made love to me here where I lie, just hours ago. He was in my life and he loves me. Wherever he is, no matter how far, and even if he never sets eyes on me, again… he'll be loving me. Just like I'll forever be loving him.

Sniff, sniff. :*(

Tell me what you think…?

We'll catch up with these boys when they're men. I'll try to get the next chapter out soon. In the mean-time, I've made teaser posters of the boys in the future that I'll go post on my facebook page (I'm Jen Soulmateficwriter) and on their tumblr (tumblr dot com forwardslash blog forwardslash sometimesboys) - right now. I think they're really cool! And they give some insight into what the boys are up to and how they might meet, again.

For the present, the song Stop and Stare by OneRepublic is Jasper's. The song California by Stroke 9 is Edward's.

And here's a small play list to bridge the gap between these boys' present and future: The Reason by Hoobastank, I'd Come for You and Far Away by Nickelback, and Never Gonna Leave this Bed by Maroon 5. I've listened to these songs to get me through writing their youth, to stay hopeful for where I want them to eventually be.

I have a 'Sometimes' playlist on my youtube account... I'm soulmateficwriter. Look me up if you want to hear the music that inspires this story.