Author's Note: Please Review!!!

CHAPTER 21 – Reasons Why

RECAP:

"Jason, let me go" Ginny tried to pry her hand away with the other.

"Ginny," Jason stopped her, holding her shoulder. Ginny stopped –wide-eyed.

"You're so fiery," his hand grabbed a fistful of Ginny's hand, bringing it to his nose. The sight of Jason sniffing her hair made Ginny's stomach twist.

She tried to yank away, but Jason kept his hold on her hair – and pulled her closer to him. Ginny screamed out in pain at the force of his grip upon her hair.

"I love you Ginny" he breathed into her face. Ginny wrinkled her nose in disgust. Jason's large hands gripped her arms tightly. Panic emanated from Ginny and filled the room with a thick air of hysteria.

"Please Jason,-"

His lips crushed against hers. The kiss was too powerful, too violent - it was suffocating her, blocking off her air – Ginny struggled against him, but Jason only pushed her body aggressively against the wall.

Ginny moaned loudly as her head contacted against the hard wall – but the sound was smothered by Jason's mouth.

The feeling of Jason's possessive lips against hers made tears slid down her face.

Why was he doing this?

Something erupted in the pit of her being. Ginny's muscles tightened in her face and body – pushing all of her energy to the surface.

Ginny was on the floor instantly – surrounded by a light transparent blue orb. Jason lay in a crumpled heap across the room – obviously thrown by the force that had mysteriously erupted from Ginny's being, hitting the back wall.

Ginny stood, and as soon as she did, the mysterious blue bubble vanished. Before she could question the magic behind her shield, Jason had awoken and was on his feet, whipping away the blood trickling from the side of his mouth.

Jason charged towards Ginny – his eyes full of wild, senseless emotions. Ginny backed up, already preparing a scream-

"Why can't you love me Ginny?" Jason screamed in her face. Ginny swallowed hard.

"I love Harry" she frowned, the words coming out stronger than she had intended.

Jason's eyes widened in disbelief. "Harry?" he laughed out. "You still love that bastard? He leaves you pregnant, stranded, and you still love him?"

Jason's sarcastic words tore at Ginny's core. Her nostrils flared.

"GO JASON! JUST GO!!" she waved her hand dismissively.

Jason was thrown against the back wall again.

Ginny cupped her mouth in horror at what she had done – never intentionally meaning to hurt him.

Jason struggled to his feet, his eyes locked with hers – full of hate.

"Jason, I-"

"You're so pathetic Ginny" Jason shook his head. "Here I am, offering you the world – and you shove it away. Well, well fuck you, Ginny!"

When Jason slammed the door behind him, Ginny was aware for the first time of the wetness cascading down her cheeks.

Ginny hesitantly opened the door, and headed back to the common room – still fearful that Jason was out in the halls, patrolling – or worse – waiting for her.

She had never been so frightened before in her life.

"Ginny?"

Neville rose from the couch at the sound of Ginny's entrance.

He caught sight of her disheveled figure.

"Oh Ginny," Neville raced towards her, hugging her close. He held her at arms-length.

"Ouch!" Ginny whimpered, and Neville let go. Ginny rolled up her sleeves to observe the damage Jason had done. Two huge hand-sized bruises wrapped around each arm.

"Did he do that to you?!" Neville's voice was full of incomprehensible rage.

Ginny unwillingly nodded. Neville sprinted towards the door.

"Neville, please!" Ginny pleaded meekly. Neville stopped, his hand on the handle.

"Why shouldn't I go after that,…that creep? Look at what he did to you!"

"Just leave it, Neville. He was drunk."

"That's no excuse! He hurt you-"

"I hurt him too, Neville."

Neville looked at her confused.

"Can we…just let it go? Until the morning, at least." Ginny was tired of the fights. Jason's words had hit her harder than anything anyone had ever said to her.

It took a moment for the chivalrous Neville to calm himself before he advanced towards Ginny and wrapped her in another, protective hug.

"I promised Harry I wouldn't let anything happen to you" he closed his eyes, muttering to himself.

Ginny chuckled. "I think I can take care of myself." Ginny recollected the blue orb – but she didn't have the strength or energy to question the magic behind the shield charm at the present.

As soon as her brace let go, Ginny's body began to sink, and Neville caught her exhausted form before it fell.

"C'mon, let's get you to bed."

Dear Hermione,

Just wondering how my best friend is doing, and Harry. I hope Ron has found you – he was really upset at the manor. Please listen to him and let him explain. I know you are deeply hurt – but he loves you, more than you know. I see it in his eyes when he talks about you.

Jason and I got in a fight, it's got me really upset. He tried to put a move past me – thank Merlin I'm pregnant. I think shield charms are instilled in my habits – they really helped me last night.

I wish I could see you both. Tell Harry L.U.F.H.

All my love,

Ginny

As soon as Ginny sent off the letter to Hermione, another owl flew through the window and landed on the pedestal in front of her. She untied the letter – it obviously was written from inside the castle walls. In Jason's scratchy, uneven scrawl.

Ginny,

You don't know how sorry I am, about last night. I don't know how I will ever live with myself again. I was drunk, I know that's no excuse, but I wasn't myself. Please forgive me Ginny, I'm so sorry I hurt you! You are the most important thing in my world right now, the only true friend I ever had…I can't believe I was stupid and conceded enough to hurt you. Please, forgive me Ginny. Could you meet me, on the grounds? Around noon? I understand if you don't want to see me, it's unforgivable, what I have done. Oh Ginny, I'm so sorry! I won't be able to live if you can't forgive me.

Sincerely yours, indebted forever,

Jason

"Don't tell me you're going to forgive that bastard!" Neville spat out vehemently.

"What can I do Neville? He said he was sorry"

Neville laughed cruelly "Sorry doesn't cut it. He's an arse! He hurt you, Ginny!"

Ginny sighed heavily. "He's my friend. He made a mistake. I need to at least speak with him."

Neville scoffed, walking off in disgust. He couldn't take it. Why was Ginny so forgiving lately? Couldn't she hold one of her nasty grudges, like she used to with Harry and Ron?

"I'm not letting you go alone Ginny" he called back over his shoulder, but Ginny disregarded him.

Harry lay on his bed, struggling to compose himself.

Hermione was re-reading Ginny's letter incessantly, her eyes wide like golfballs.

"What is in that letter Hermione?"

"Nothing Harry, nothing" she replied quickly. Too quickly.

"Let me see it!"

"No!" she swung away from his reaching arm.

"FINE THEN!!" Harry stormed from the bed. He had had enough.

"Mate," Ron caught up with him. "Where are you going?" he shivered as he left the tent without his cloak.

"To Hogwarts."

"But mate! You can't – they'll spot you and-"

"I DON'T FUCKIN GIVE A BLOODY CARE!!!" Harry whirled on his best mate. Ron had never seen Harry this deranged.

"Mate, if it's about my sister, she's fine."

Harry began to fume. "Yea, sure Ron." Every passing second Harry's stomach was nagging him that something was wrong. Something just wasn't right.

"I'm going to see her."

"Merlin Harry, HERMIONE!" Ron called. Already Hermione had sprinted from the tent and was grabbing at Harry's arm. Harry tried to fling her away – as if some vicious fly were bothering him.

"Let me alone Hermione!"

"Please Harry! You can't! Ron, you have to stop him!!"

Ron couldn't quite understand the meaning behind Hermione's hysterics, but he grappled for Harry's arms.

"Harry, just cooperate-"

"I'M GOING INSANE RON! I CAN'T STAND THIS ANY LONGER!!!"

Jerking himself hastily away, Harry bolted from the circle – and apparated.

Ginny approached the figure planted before the edge of the lake. His body was completely hunched over, as if in pain. His legs were drawn to his chest, his head leaning against his knees. He turned his head at the sound of Ginny's coming.

"Ginny," he sighed in relief "I thought you wouldn't come."

"Well, you said it was a matter of life and death"

He gave her a curious look.

" 'I won't be able to live if you can't forgive me?' " she reminded him.

"Oh," Jason smiled softly. "Well, it worked."

Ginny seated herself beside him, her body starting to shake – just waiting for Jason to lash out again. Why am I taking this risk?

Because he's your friend. He deserves a chance to explain.

Jason peered over at Ginny's silently shuddering, and shook his head.

"Ginny, what I did last night…was unforgivable."

Ginny waited in silence for him to continue.

"I got drunk last night. I know, I was stupid. I've had a stash for a while – I used to drink over the summer, after my mum passed. It helped ease the pain a little. Lately though, I've been feeling a different kind of pain."

Ginny's eyebrows arched as Jason turned to her.

"I didn't realize it till lately, but…I'm in love with you, Ginny Weasley. I think I've loved you all along, just never understood it." He looked back over the lake.

Ginny sat in shock as Jason continued to explain.

"The pain got so bad, I needed to tell you – had to tell you. So I wrote to you, to meet me in the room of requirement last night – so I could confess my feelings."

Jason shifted, his eyes darkening.

"But then I considered all the options. What if you didn't feel the same? It killed me that you were in love with Harry, when he left you long ago – abandoning you and your unborn child. I was so overwhelmed by the possibility of you not loving me, and your pain in missing Harry, that I selfishly took to drinking again.

"Only an hour later when I realized I was supposed to meet you, did I come to my senses enough to get my arse off the ground and move. But when I saw you, all the alcohol was clouding my rational thought – and,…oh Ginny, I never meant to hurt you!"

Jason looked on desperately.

"I love you, don't you understand? I would never, EVER intentionally harm you" he grabbed at his hair. "How can I live with myself anymore?"

Ginny took hold of Jason's arms, lowering them to the ground. "Jason, it's okay."

"Please Ginny, I'm so sorry-"

"I forgive you"

"Y-you what?" Jason wasn't expecting Ginny's easy reply. But something about Jason's words hit home for Ginny. She, herself, remembered the unrequited love she had for Harry growing up – it almost caused her physical pain. And although she could never love Jason, that way, she needed to console him – let him know that he was forgiven.

"I forgive you, Jason."

At her words, Jason broke into sobs, his head falling into Ginny's shoulder.

After a considerable time of silence – Jason peered up at Ginny, his eyes hopeful.

"Can we still be friends?"

"Of course!" Ginny's radiant smile lit up her entire face in a glow. Jason grinned Ginny's favorite crooked grin.

"Come here," Jason patted the grass in front of him.

Ginny scooted in front of Jason so that she was between his legs. Like old times, she rested her body against his front, his legs coming up on either side of her. It was oddly comforting to have him by her again. She rested her hands upon her bulging stomach – now 6 months pregnant.

She relaxed her head against his shoulder, and he rested his head atop hers.

"I accept that you love Harry," Jason finally spoke, although the words were tentative. "Have you,…talked to him lately?"

"No" she sighed, staring off at the landscape of mountains looming over the crystal blue lake. "I miss him so much," droplets fell onto her lap "and I can't seem to accept the fact that he's never coming back. He'll…he'll probably die before I see him again"

Her last words sent her into full-blown tears. Jason could feel the shudder spasms of her body.

"Sh," he hushed in her ear. Ginny sniffled, trying to calm herself. "It's okay, Gin, he'll come back for you. I promise. I'll fetch him myself if I have to."

He adjusted so that Ginny could rest herself back against him further – her head on his left shoulder. She closed her eyes, trying to fight the images of battle scenes – and fallen warriors scattered amongst the ground.

She was finally starting to relax, her body falling into Jason's' comforting embrace – when she heard it.

"Ginny?"

The hesitant tone wasn't the first thing that struck Ginny as her eyes flew open. It was the sound of her angel's voice. The voice she had longed to hear for months. His voice.