So, for this chapter, the band that's being booked for the dance is a band I created for the novel I'm writing. The band leader is a sassy demon named Reeah (but no one knows she's actually a demon). She's not a main character, but I thought it would be fun to include her and her band in this. Just so you know where they came from.
Anyways, why is Stan acting like a jackass? I don't know, why don't you read the chapter and find out? Also, we're finally going to begin this stupid dance, so that should be fun!
"Singing Radiohead at the top of our lungs, with the boom box blaring as we're falling in love! Got a bottle of whatever, but it's getting us drunk, singing Here's to never growing up!"
Chapter Twenty-One – I've heard it both ways
If Kyle hadn't read the conversation Stan had with Dr. Pidd, he would have burst out laughing. Now he had the very real fear that Stan was going to try and kill him. Right in front of his own house. He was still glaring down at Kyle, waiting for him to respond to this accusation, but it was kind of hard to think when the air was being pressed out of his lungs.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kyle managed to gasp eventually. "What on earth would make you think that I'm dating Wendy?"
"I'm not blind, I've seen the looks you share," Stan snarled at him. "And you two have been hanging out more than usual! I just saw you leaving and walking home from her house!"
Kyle frowned up at him, and an anger started burning in his chest. "Not that it's any of your fucking business, but Wendy needed my opinion on something," he growled, narrowing his eyes. "And if you were paying any god damn attention, you'd notice that she hangs out with Cartman and Kenny just as much as she does with me."
Stan blinked uncertainly. "But…" he started to say. But, he was cut off when Kyle, in his own building anger, shoved Stan right off of him and threw him onto his back. He was surprised when he felt his own shoulders being pinned to the ground, and Kyle's face was inches from his own, glaring furiously down at him and breathing heavily.
"How many times do I have to fucking tell you?" Kyle hissed in his face. "I'm not going to date my best friend's ex-girlfriend, no matter how wrong he is! I'm not dating Wendy, I never have dated her, and I never will date her!"
Stan stared up in surprise at him, but it wasn't from his harsh words. It was the fact that he could see tears starting to form in Kyle's eyes, and the fact that he was shaking violently. All of his anger immediately left him, leaving him an empty shell.
"I lost my best friend," Kyle snarled at him, anger still burning in his eyes. "She lost her boyfriend! Why on earth would you think we would fuck it up further for ourselves?"
Stan couldn't bear to look Kyle in the eye. He couldn't tell him what he really thought now. Or that it was Angela's suggestion. Not that he needed to say anything, because Kyle narrowed his eyes at him a moment later and his lips drew back into a snarl.
"You think I'm trying to make Angela jealous, don't you?" he snapped, sitting up straight. "I can't believe you honestly still believe that I would like that bitch! I thought you were smarter than that, but I guess I was wrong."
"Kyle," Stan tried to say, but Kyle had heard enough.
"You know what, Stan?" he hissed, standing up. "You don't want to believe the obvious truth, then fine! You're going to look like a total idiot when you realize that you're the only one who doesn't believe me and your fake relationship eventually crashes and burns! And you better not come crying to me when that happens!"
Then, before Stan could answer, Kyle angrily turned on his heel and stormed into his own house, slamming the door hard behind him. Stan lay outside for a long time, letting the argument wash over him as he stared blankly up at the sky. Then, he slowly pulled himself up and dejectedly made his way to his own house. He quickly ran up to his room, calling to his mom that he wasn't hungry when she asked, and threw himself onto his bed before he finally let the tears he had been holding back flow from his eyes.
The next day was the day before the dance, and things could not have been looking any grimmer. Kenny and Cartman could immediately see the sleep deprivation on both Stan and Kyle's faces. What confused everyone was that now it seemed that Kyle was angrier at Stan than Stan was at him. And both of them refused to tell anyone why that was.
The only one of the fourth graders that seemed excited for the dance was Butters, but even he refused to say what theme they picked, because the others had convinced him that they had to make it a surprise. So, absolutely no one else in the fourth grade knew what the theme of the dance was going to be.
Stan slumped through the halls after class, looking for someone to talk to who would understand. He turned the corner to see his three friends and Wendy in a small group, talking in low voices. He let out a sigh, feeling his heart start to break, then started to make his way over to them. But, he didn't get very far before he felt someone grab his arm and begin to pull him in the opposite direction.
"Come on, Stan," Angela was saying in a loud voice. "You have to walk me home! It will be so romantic!"
"But…" Stan started to protest, but his argument was lost on her, and he was quickly pulled away.
Out of the corner of his eye, Kyle watched them go, and he couldn't help but narrow his eyes at how little resistance Stan put up to being dragged away by his bitch of a girlfriend. He turned back to the others, having not really paid attention to their conversation.
"I wouldn't be surprised if Dr. Pidd was really a brain washing witch," Wendy was saying (apparently Kenny had been telling her all of the advice that the guys had been given). "Apparently she hinted to Bebe that she should follow Twilight's example and throw herself off of something to get her crush's attention."
"That's horrible!" Kenny said, his eyes widening. "Who's her crush?"
"That's none of your business," Wendy snapped at him. "And Nichole told me that Dr. Pidd suggested to her that she should burn Token's house down."
Kenny and Cartman exchanged confused glances, but before either of them could ask why, or tell her that Token had gotten the same exact advice, Kyle let out a long sigh.
"Can we talk about something else?" he asked them, staring at the ground. He didn't really want to think about the crazy doctor or the insane, homicidal things she had been telling all of their friends. Or what he had read in both Stan and Cartman's files. "I mean, we all know she's terrible at her job. There's not much else we can do about it."
Cartman blinked at him before responding. "We need to go to the store," he stated. "To get snacks for the dance." Kyle gave him a sideways glare.
"We did that yesterday," he pointed out with a slight growl to his voice. Cartman shuffled his feet slightly, not looking at him.
"Yeah, but the candy's all gone," he said to a chorus of annoyed groans.
"Ok, so Cartman's no longer in charge of the food," Wendy decided, rolling her eyes.
Cartman glared at her but didn't argue with the fact that this was definitely for the best. He opened his mouth to say something else, but Kyle had already turned and started walking away. His friends blinked in surprise and started following him. Cartman could see him stiffen as they fell in step with him.
"Stan seemed kind of different today," Kenny ventured, deciding not to ask why Kyle had just rudely started walking away from them without a word. Kyle let out a sigh.
"Guys, I really just want to be alone for a while," he told them, not acknowledging Kenny's statement.
"Do you know what happened with him?" Wendy asked, ignoring his words.
"I don't want to talk about it," Kyle snapped. He let out a slight hiss when Cartman and Wendy pressed themselves against him. Neither of them moved away. "Will you guys please just leave me alone?"
Wendy smiled slyly at him before leaning over and kissing him on the cheek. "Nope," she replied. "You're stuck with us." He rolled his eyes in response.
Kyle knew that the three of them were just trying to make him feel better. But they really weren't helping that fact when they just decided to follow him all the way home. Well, they weren't going to get anything from him. He was just determined to stay pissed off.
What didn't help matters was the fact that Stan was blowing up his phone with text messages. Yesterday, he would have done anything to have Stan talk to him again, but now he just ignored his phone, not even looking at the messages.
He didn't want to admit to Stan that Wendy had tried to get him to fake date her simply to make Stan jealous. From the way he was acting, Stan would probably just assume that Wendy had broken Kyle down, and he didn't need Stan to be mad at Wendy as well. And maybe he was still too angry about last night, but for some reason he didn't want to tell his friends about Stan's accusation either.
The next day was Valentine's Day as well as the dance, and it was perhaps the most awkward Valentine's Day the school had ever known. The fourth grade wasn't quite past the point where handing out Valentine cards was considered stupid or lame, but nobody in the class seemed to be in a very giving mood. It wasn't surprising; apparently half the class had been told by Dr. Pidd to murder or maim the other half of the class in some way.
Mr. Garrison ended class by stating that he hoped to see most of his students at the dance that night, and the class let out a collective groan. No one really wanted to go to the dance, but nearly all of their parents were making them go so they could have alone time with each other. Then the bell rang and everyone began to slump away.
Kyle quickly gathered up his things, ignoring whoever was calling his name, and quickly left the room, wondering if he should bother going to his locker. He heard rushing feet, and he didn't need to turn around to know that Kenny and Cartman had caught up to him. He stiffened and slowed his step when he felt Cartman press lightly against him.
Kenny started to say something, but he cut himself short when they heard a familiar voice calling to them. Kyle considered not even turning around to face Stan, but something told him that he wasn't going to leave him alone until he did. He took a half step away from Cartman before whipping around to glare at his former best friend.
"What do you want, Stan?" he growled at him. "Have you come to accuse me of something else now? You going to try and make it sound like I tried to sleep with your mom too?"
Stan blinked in surprise at him, his mouth slightly open as if he had been about to say something, but all his words had been caught in his throat. Kenny and Cartman also couldn't help but stare in shock at his sudden outburst. Anger and hurt were still blazing in his green eyes as he waited for Stan to speak.
"I-I'm sorry for accusing you of dating Wendy," he stuttered after a moment. "I just wasn't thinking straight. I was mad, and I guess I was just looking for any excuse to be angry."
Kyle's face didn't soften. "Why do you care what Wendy does anyways?" he hissed at him. "You're dating someone else, if you can even call it that! You can't let her move on if you keep dangling hope over her like that!"
"I'm not!" Stan defended himself. "Or at least, I'm not trying to. I want her to be happy too. But why should she care about who I date? She broke up with me!"
"Why don't you ask her yourself instead of accusing me of bullshit all the time?" Kyle snarled. Stan rubbed his shoulder awkwardly.
"I was actually planning on talking to her tonight at the dance about it," he admitted with a mumble. "And I knew you guys have been hanging out with her a lot, so I was hoping you could help me."
Immediately, Kyle's look of rage was replaced with one of sheer terror, and he exchanged a panicked look with Cartman.
"Actually, we were just thinking that the four of us could just ditch the dance," Kyle told him frantically. "It's not going to be all that fun anyways."
"Yeah," Cartman agreed. "And where does it say that we have to go to some stupid dance anyways? None of us like dances and what do we have to look forward to? Some crappy food and standing awkwardly in the corner?"
"Relax, you two," Stan sighed, rolling his eyes. "I'm sure the theme you picked can't be that bad!"
"Seriously?" Stan said slowly, staring at what had been done to the gym in disbelief while Kyle and Cartman both stood with their heads in their hands. "This was the theme you guys chose? Out of all the things you could have picked, you chose a Disney theme?"
"That has got to be the lamest, most idiotic dance theme idea ever!" Kenny added, shaking his head.
"We know," their two friends hissed at the same time.
"Why would you guys go with Disney of all things?" Stan wondered. Kyle glared at him.
"It wasn't our fault," he defended himself. "At the meetings, Butters was the only one who was coming up with ideas. Wendy and Angela were at each other's throats, and Cartman and I didn't care, so he just came up with an idea himself!"
"Yeah, but weren't all the grades supposed to come together and vote on the best idea?" Kenny wondered. "Surely the fifth and sixth graders wouldn't have voted for it."
"They probably wouldn't have if they had actually shown up," Cartman said, rolling his eyes. "The only ones who showed up for that stupid voting thing was us and the kindergarteners."
"Yeah, and once Butters said the word 'Disney' they wouldn't hear any other idea," Kyle muttered, still ashamed that he was forced to be a part of the entire thing.
"Wow," Stan replied. "You guys really blew it, didn't you?" Neither of them responded to that, but instead stared daggers at their friend.
"Well, we did manage to get a band…" Kyle started, but Stan interrupted him.
"Oh, please don't tell me you guys got Puke Street!" he sighed.
"No, we didn't," Kyle growled. "We got Devil's in the Details."
Stan and Kenny stared in surprise. "You actually managed to get Devil's in the Details?" Kenny said in shock. "How the fuck did you manage to pull that off?"
"I have a friend in New York who knows the lead singer, Reeah," Kyle explained. "She gives her voice lessons and they're good friends, so she asked if they'd come play for us."
"Who do you know from New York?" Kenny wondered.
"Wait, your friend is a girl?" Cartman added, bewildered.
"There's no way you actually got Devil's in the Details," Stan said in disbelief.
Kyle opened his mouth to reply to their comments, but at that moment, a tall, dark skinned woman with chin length, bright purple hair and blue highlights, wearing a halter top, ankle length dark purple dress came walking up to them with four other people trailing behind her. They were all wearing devil horns and wings, and the woman had a devil tail that seemed to move on its own.
"Hey," she greeted in a warm voice. She looked the four of them over and her eyes rested on Kyle, who she grinned at. "You're Kyle Broflovski, aren't you? Brooke told me about you when she asked us to play here."
Kyle couldn't help but grin at the shocked expressions on his friends' faces. "That's right," he told her. She held out a fist for a fist bump, which he accepted.
"Thanks for having us," the woman said. "I'm Reeah, and these are my band mates. We'll make sure this dance is the best dance ever." She turned to the rest of the devils. "Come on, guys, let's go set up."
Then they walked away, lugging equipment over to the stage that had been set up.
"Wow," was all Kenny could say.
"Yeah, most famous bands think it's beneath them to play at a school dance," Kyle explained with a hint of smugness to his voice. "But my friend told me how the Devils believe that any publicity is good, and even have a low rate for schools."
"You think I could get their autographs?" Kenny asked, still staring in awe.
Kyle opened his mouth to reply, but at that moment, Reeah stepped up to the mike and the entire gym started to quiet down as people started to realize who was on stage.
"All right, South Park," Reeah greeted, flashing her surprisingly pointy fangs. "It's great to be here! We are Devil's in the Details, and we're here to make sure you all have the night of your lives!" There was a loud cheer. "We'll be setting up a request box because apparently our own songs are 'too graphic for the children,' and because our fucking songs have too much god-damn swearing in it. So, unfortunately, you'll have to settle for mostly shit other people wrote, but I think you'll have fun anyways."
A lot of the teachers looked appalled at this last statement. The band quickly finished setting up, and Reeah picked up her own guitar before stepping back up to the mike.
"Ok, this first one goes out to the kid who invited us here," Reeah announced. She winked in Kyle's direction. "This one's for you, babe."
Then the band took up their instruments and began to play Avril Lavene's "Here's to Never Growing Up."
I think you'll be surprised to learn that I like the song "Here's to Never Growing Up." Wait, you weren't surprised? Well, how did you know then?
Anyways, how many of you managed to guess the theme? Next time, we'll see what Wendy decided to dress up as, and then drama will happen and everything will start to go downhill. It will be fun.