Rock On

Chapter 21

'You owe me nothing Tom.' Bill had been standing in the doorway of the bedroom and had overheard this part of the conversation between Cherie and Tom. It touched him to the core. He had no idea how on earth he was going to tell him, tell them both not only what he had done but what Robert had told him. The pain that the truth was going to cause him, and all of them, was almost too much for him to contemplate.

At the sound of Bill's voice Cherie looked up sharply then getting up, she ran into Bill's arms. 'Oh Bill are you alright? What happened, where is Robert?' Looking over her shoulder, he could see Tom's face asking the same questions but then a look of comprehension spread over his face, comprehension and almost relief Bill thought. Disentangling Cherie's arms from around his neck, he took her hand and led her over to the bed and sat her down next to Tom. 'I need to talk to you both and seeing that we have no secrets from each other, I think that I owe both of you an explanation and you should hear it together.

Cherie swallowed hard, she didn't know why but the serious tone in Bill's voice made her very apprehensive. Tom, on the other hand, kept his face a blank mask. Without pulling any punches Bill told them what had happened, leaving out nothing but never taking his eyes off the two of them, watching closely for their reactions. It was hard to tell which he was more worried about, Cherie and the fact that he was admitting that he had committed murder or Tom and the dawning realisation that his whole vampire existence was a sole result of Lorena's obsession with him and her desire to replicate something that she could never have. Either way, he felt abjectly sorry for both of them.

'Well,' Tom said as Bill stood facing them, his cold dead heart nearly breaking at the thought of losing one or both of them, 'there is only one thing for it then.' Bill looked at him questioningly. 'We will have to get a new cricket bat.' And with that Tom got up and hugged Bill. 'Did you think that I would blame you for what Lorena or Robert did you stupid sod. You have given me more love than I ever had in my entire life from Robert. I love you mate, nothing, and I really mean nothing, is ever going to change that.'

Cherie stood up too, looking him straight in the eyes as she stepped in to hug him too and said, 'You did the right thing. It was the only thing to do.' The three of them stood for minutes just holding one another. They had an inseparable bond that had been tested and found to be strong enough to withstand more than Bill could ever have imaged.

The relief he was feeling poured through him and through the blood bond that he had with Cherie. She looked up at him and saw the tension oozing out of him. She suddenly realised how very hard it must have been for someone like Bill to have taken the action that he did and how much it must have weighed on his mind. Not just the fact that he had inadvertently been responsible for Tom's turning but that he had been so distressed about what her reaction to his killing Robert would be.

She admitted to herself that she didn't know a lot about vampires, tonight had been an example really of that but she knew enough about Bill now to know that she considered herself to be one of the luckiest woman alive. She had found someone that had morals far and above the norm. As she looked at him now, a wave of the deepest love poured out through her. Bill felt it and looked back into her eyes, as he too poured out his soul into her, into the bond.

They each broke away from the other and Bill gently took her hand, leading her off towards his bedroom. When they got to the door they both turned back to look at Tom, 'Good night Tom, and thank you for being here for us, for both of us,' Cherie said with heartfelt thanks. 'Night mate,' Bill smiled, 'see you tomorrow night.' Tom nodded and smiled wistfully after them before settling down to finish reading Cherie's copy of Midnight Express that she had lent him. He was a speed reader so it would only take him a short time and he really needed to unwind. He had a lot to think about.

When finally alone in his bedroom, Bill took Cherie in his arms and carried her over to the bed, lying her down before sitting down beside her. He took her hand and lifting it he kissed it, not in a sexual way but every bit as intimately. She sat up and was in his arms in an instant. Her arms twined around his neck, her lips frantically searching for his. 'Bill I…' He raised his finger to her lips and shushed her then smothered her in kisses, kissing her mouth, her cheeks and her eyes. He ran his fingers down through her silken hair, grabbing a handful and gently pulling her closer into the embrace.

'You know that I love you don't you?' she asked trembling at her own words as he held her tightly to him. He pulled away a little to gaze into her eyes. It had been so long, decades since anyone had said that to him, not since … no he couldn't think of it, he wouldn't think of Morocco, not now. This was now, nineteen eighty one and he was living in the present, not the past. The past had long enough shadows to intrude on the here and now as it was, tonight was just one example of how the past catches up and holds you in its clutches but right now, right at this moment all he wanted was to feel her love for him and his for her.

He ran his long fingers down her cheek, tenderly brushing a silken strand of her hair out of her eyes. He loved the way that it fell around her face, loved touching the soft silken threads that always seemed to caress her cheeks. 'I love you Cherie.' There, he had said it. Finally he had said it. He could not hold back and despite his fears that he was not good enough for her, not deserving enough, he could not hold back any longer what he had felt since the night that they had met and she had taken such a chance on him.

'I want you to listen to me and not say anything till I finish.' She was about to protest but again he quietened her with his fingers to her lips. 'I don't ever want you to have to see or go through what you did tonight. I don't ever want you to doubt me. I want you to be honest with me now. Tell me, were you scared of me tonight, scared by my true nature. I want you to be honest with me, please.'

'Bill I was shocked that you spoke to me like that. You have never talked like that to me but I know why you did it. I also know that you are worried or were worried that I would hate you for what you did to Robert but I can't ever hate you. I want to try to understand that other part of you. I want you to share that with me so that I know what it is, this dark passenger that you carry with you. I love you, all of you so that includes your other self but I need to understand what it is that I am loving. You don't need to protect me from you, you need to let me in so I can love all of you.'

'I know that you hate that other side of you, I know how it eats you at times but Bill, I am here for you, I am not going to leave so you have to get used to it. Unless,' she hesitated, clearly an idea had struck her that she hadn't thought of before, 'unless you don't want me.' She said this in such a small lost voice that he was stricken. How could she ever dream that he didn't want her? He wanted her alright. He wanted every inch of her, he wanted her heart and he wanted her soul but he felt that he had no right to her. What could he offer her, he was one of the dammed, the undead, that is no future for her. She should walk in the sun with her children and grandchildren around her.

'I have no right to want you,' he said sadly. 'Bill, that isn't up to you, that is up to me to decide isn't it. I have told you before, I told you that you are more of a man, and I feel safer with you, than with any other man that I have ever met. I love you Bill Compton, and I don't give a rats toss who or what you are. You are mine, right now, right this minute and I am yours if you want me.'

Taking her in his arms he gently laid her down before lying down next to her. 'I want you, trust me I so want you,' he whispered and covered her in tender kisses to prove his point.