Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar: The Last Airbender. :)
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Chapter 21: Mind Games
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The battle raged fiercely. Toph was completely exhausted; she gasped for air, but smoke was everywhere, polluting every possible breath of sweet, sweet oxygen. She couldn't concentrate. Her head was spinning, thoughts swirling and twirling, trivial worries that held no meaning whatsoever in her time and place crashing around in her head. Few in the battlefield were better off, and many were much worse; she reminded herself of this fact and stood to her full height. Anyone else's legs would have shaken almost uncontrollably in her condition, but being an accomplished earthbender kept her stance steady. She was indestructible. That's what everyone else thought, at least, and even though she knew it to be false, it was comforting to think of herself this way.
She couldn't feel Katara or Aang or even Sokka anymore; the smoke made all of her thoughts fuzzy, incomplete, shadows of what they should have been. It both frightened and angered her. Of course, earthbending itself wasn't difficult at all, even at that moment; the ground beneath her was the most reassuring thing right now. She could depend on it.
One pair of feet fell into her visibility. She would have recognized those steps, that stance, that gait anywhere, in any condition. These feet, together, stood as a single ray of light in near darkness, were as recognizable to a person with sight as a flash of vibrant red in a setting of dull gray.
A smile tugged at her lips.
New energy surged in her veins. It was the beautiful power of revenge, of pure hate, of everything she knew she shouldn't feel but felt anyway, because in her own mind, everything she felt was justified. Justified by the deceit, by the betrayal, by the hurt. Of course, maybe she was taking it a little too far, but all's fair in love and war, or so she'd always heard.
She brought her hands down in a definite motion, just enough to make Ru sink to his ankles in earth. He didn't struggle; in fact, he relaxed a little, as though he were expecting the move. She swept her arms sideways in an almost fluid motion, contrary to her bending type, and he was pulled past many gleaming swords, like the teeth of a carnivore; past streams of glistening water, past burning flames, past flying rocks and the occasional wisp of wind that was thought to come from Aang but was, in fact, simply a product of a breeze that swept around the battlefield every now and again.
Thoughts raged in Ru's head. He'd never been in battle; it wasn't like he'd expected. The first body he'd stepped over had belonged to a man he'd exchanged jokes with the night before. They hadn't exactly been friends, but they had been friendly. It made everything seem a little more real, like this could happen to anyone. Like it could happen to him. He was only fifteen! He wasn't ready to die! Especially for something that he didn't even truly comprehend- the rebellion gave him something to stand for, and that was why he was a part of it. It gave him meaning. He didn't know a whole lot about the war; he'd only been eleven when the fighting ended! What did I get myself into?
Of course, he wouldn't let his inner thoughts show on the outside. It was something he'd learned from Azula; she hadn't actually shared this advice with him, but he knew that she put such a policy into practice. He thought very highly of her (then again, most of her followers thought of her this way).
So this was where Ru was. His father was home, worried sick, and he himself could very well end up dead when all of this was over. He was in the middle of a battle, an actual battle, led by Azula herself. It was a dream that had suddenly taken a nightmarish twist. Death could be on his doorstep right at that moment; in his mind he could hear the quiet, solemn knocking, an echo that reverberated in his brain, and knew that he was letting the battle get to him. He thought of his father, of what he'd say, of what he'd think. It certainly wouldn't have an approving edge, and Ru felt like his heart twisting in his chest.
Toph stationed the patch of earth in which his feet were caught just outside of where the fighting became incomprehensible. To her left, trees; her right, the thick of the battle. She approached him and, though each step caused her pain, acted as though she were completely unharmed. If anyone had taken the time out of their own personal dilemmas to look at her, even for more than a moment, they wouldn't be able to tell that her lungs were burning, her back was aching, and she was completely exhausted. She carried herself with pride; a pride that did not come from her regal bloodline, but from the hard work and patience of a person who indeed had a lot to be proud of. She didn't allow, she wouldn't allow, weaknesses to show. To show weakness was to succumb to the possibility of defeat.
They stood for a moment, facing each other. Toph was readying herself, drinking in the moment, and Ru simply waited. He showed no fear, but he wasn't exactly what could be defined as "confident," either.
Finally Ru spoke. "Well? You gonna let me go or what?"
"No, I don't think I will," Toph replied easily.
Ru drew back his arm and fired in one quick movement. Azula cherished every second of an attack, but Ru wasted no time, quick to get to the point, bluntly attacking his opponent. Perhaps this was something he'd inherited from one of his parents. Perhaps it was something he'd learned. Perhaps neither.
Had Toph not thrown herself aside, she would have been burned. As it was, however, she had anticipated Ru's move and, even as he drew his hand back in that one quick motion, she forced the ground to choke up a boulder and as he focused his hit on where she'd stood, she propelled the boulder toward her attacker.
It hit the target. She was no longer focusing on the patch of earth beneath Ru's feet, so he could have jumped out of the way, but he hadn't been expecting her move. He was thrown backward; he scrambled to his feet, seemingly unharmed, and Toph hurled another boulder at him. This time he was ready and he produced a shield of fire that both deflected Toph's attack and served as his own. Fire was spinning around him, expanding at a terribly fast rate. She couldn't outrun it so she kicked up a rock wall and fired it at him.
It was too tall to jump over and too wide to dodge. He made a quick decision and point both hands toward the wall. A blast of fire shot out of each palm at the same moment and he was thrown backward; the rock crumbled between the pressure of the hit and the force its creator had powered it with.
He was nimble. She didn't think he was any better than any other opponent she'd faced, but this time she felt different. She wanted to prolong their fight. She wanted to wear him down, to make him suffer until he couldn't escape her line of fire anymore. She wanted to make him hurt.
She knew it wasn't healthy for her to feel so good about another's demise, but she didn't blame herself. It wasn't natural to have such feelings of anger, of hate, especially since she fought for the side that stood for peace and love. She just couldn't help herself. He deserved to hurt.
Ru stood from his landing position. He was panting slightly, but he was glad he was farther away. He was thankful for the extra headway and he pulled back his arm again and fired once more; Toph lifted herself on a column, which proved not to be the best way to avoid the attack. The flames didn't hit her, but they smashed into her pillar. There was a crash as Toph plummeted to the ground, landing in a pile of rocks.
He can't win. I won't let him. Sheer willpower caused her to roll over, avoiding another blast; she stood. Everything ached with severe intensity. She took the rocks that served as the final remnants of her pillar and fired them at him; he avoided every one.
He was making her angry. He was panting, a little more heavily now, but not nearly enough; he could keep this up longer than she could. It was time to end it.
"I'm tired of this. I'm done." Toph made a leaning column shoot out of the ground. He was thrown back, this time not by choice.
"Tired? Already?" His voice was airy, like he wasn't nearly as exhausted as she knew he was. "I expected a little more from you than-"
He avoided a slurry of earthen daggers that she shot; "-this," he finished.
They both knew she was wearing him down. He was aware that if she wanted to, she could finish their fight then and there; she was older, more experienced, stronger, held titles and recognitions he could only dream of. She wasn't bringing him down yet, however; she wanted him to feel pain. He figured that while she let him live, he could at least enjoy it. "Azula thinks Zuko's a pathetic loser. I guess that means you and your friends fall into that category, too."
He jumped around sporadically; she found no pattern she could follow. He was tormenting her, and he was enjoying it. "You're all failures."
Toph tried to focus. She couldn't pinpoint him. He stayed in one general vicinity, but never in one exact place for more than a moment. "I figured an accomplished earthbender would be able to bring me down in seconds. Guess not."
"Would you shut-up?" Toph shouted. She couldn't concentrate. She didn't think he would comply, since her concentration could very well lead to his demise, but yelling allowed her to relieve a bit of the stress clouding around her.
He stopped leaping around for a couple of seconds - long enough to shout, "You know, I don't think I will," - and in that time period she was able to hurl a boulder at him with the last bit of energy she had. Somewhat to her surprise, it hit the intended target, and Ru slammed against a tree.
The breath was knocked out of him. Toph would have very well liked to do more damage, but the energy that had powered her revenge was gone. Exhaustion took hold of her, and she suddenly wondered how long they'd been fighting. Numbers bounced around in her mind and a headache burst forth. Have to finish it...
His heartbeat was weak, but evident. He was nearly out. She lifted her arms to bring one more boulder out of the ground, forced them forward, propelling the mass of rock in the same direction. She had ended it.
A smiled reached her lips, barely. It was savage to feel satisfaction at death... at least, that's what she'd always thought. The war had changed her, the rebellion had changed her. Not too much, mind you, but enough to where her opinions on death and destruction had been altered.
She attempted to turn and make her way toward the battle so that she might continue fighting, but her muscles refused to move. She fell to the ground, exhausted, drifting into unconsciousness against all remaining willpower; she was shielded by the ever-changing shadows that the moon cast down, a still figure that anyone would think dead but, in actuality, was simply too drained to do anything more for the time.
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