Bittersweet: (Enters the imaginary writer's room.) Hi! Bittersweet here,and just announcing that here's.. (Cue drum roll.) Chapter twenty! (Throws confetti,and starts dancing happily.
Naruto: (Blinks.) I don't see anything important about it,dattebayo!
Bittersweet: Uh.. You're in it,is it important now?
Naruto: What?! Really? Why didn't anybody tell me,dattebayo?!
Bittersweet: (Sweat drops.) But,besides that.. I hope you guys enjoy! We'd appreciate your feedback,so please,don't be afraid to tell us if you thought it sucked or if you really liked.. Or,um,loved.. (Winks.) The chapter,kay? Thank you,please enjoy chapter twenty of Why Us You Stupid Plushy! (Pants.) Wow,that was a mouth full..(Sweat drops.)
"So.. The ones Orochimaru manipulated are ahead,un?"
"Don't you mean 'molested'?"Muffin mumbled under her breath,earning an annoyed glare from Deidara. The red haired Akatsuki member turned to the blonde haired artist,frowning.
"Yes,they are.. But do you think one bag is enough?"Sasori asked,raising a brow at Deidara's pouch full of clay.
"Don't worry,un. I came up with something new that should take him out,yeah.. I knew I had to be prepared because he is the one tails,after all,un."
A few yards away was a large gate,made of uneven layers of rock. A few ninjas stood there,patrolling and taking watch. A sand nin with a chunnin vest blinked in surprise,finally noticing the trio in the distance. "What's that?" He squinted his eyes,trying to make out their figures.. 'Looks like red clouds on black cloaks.. That's...!' The ninja looked over his shoulder,noticing a jonin with a plastic piece covering his jaw. "Captain Yura!"The ninja exclaimed,blinking in surprise.
"Don't worry.. It'll all be over soon."He said with a glint in his eye,making the ninja peer at him strangely.
"C-Captain Yura? What are you talking abo-!"
A few yards away,Muffin frowned,thinking she heard something.. Oh well,probably the wind,Muffin thought. The uneven,layered gates of Suna opened accordingly. After they had opened,Muffin blinked at what she saw. "Whoa.."
Yura stood infront of a dozen lifeless bodies,expressionless. His vest was stained with blood,and had a full scratches around his body. The puppet Akatsuki member smirked,before nodding slowly. "Well done.. You still remembered me?"
The ninja captain nodded curtly,before responding,"Yes sir! Of course,Sasori-sama!"
Deidara wiped a small sweat coming from his brow,before sighing with relief. "It's a good thing your memories returned,yeah. Because if you had forgotten,I might've been required to blow you up,un." It wasn't that Deidara didn't want to blow things(Or people) up,it was just because he didn't want to alert everyone.. That would mean people would come rushing,and he'd have to use his clay. And if he used all of his clay by the time the one tailed container arrived.. Deidara shuddered,before pocketing his pouch. The tongues in his palms absorbed the clay,and started chewing it. "Alright then.." Saliva oozed from his palm's tongue,making Muffin cringe in disgust.
"Ew.." she said simply.
"Let's move out,un.."
Melody paced in Gaara's office. Today was the day Deidara and Sasori were supposed to show up. She was nervous, anxious, upset... whatever you wanted to call it. She wasn't in a happy mood. Gaara watched her from where he sat, a little worried. She'd even burned breakfast because of this insistent pacing. Melody glared at the ground. "Damn it..." she muttered.
Suddenly,a loud voice hollared above the light brown haired teenager,startling her. "Boo!" The puppet controlling Suna ninja snickered in result,making Gaara roll his eyes. "Oh come on,what's with the frown? Are you still mad about last night? Come on,Temari made me destroy all the copies,so don't pout!" Kankuro said,oblivious to the real reason of why she was in a bad mood.
Mel sent a glare his way. "Shut up." She snapped, but couldn't help the dark blush that spread across her cheeks. The memory of last night flashed across her memory, but it only made the knowledge of the future weight mor heavier on her heart. Tears glistened in her eyes for a second, before she pushed them back down. She crossed her arms over her chest and walked over to Gaara's desk. She sat down on it and sighed a long sigh.
"What's bothering you?"Gaara said,a bit concerned. She seemed more happier last night.. Well,until Kankuro came and ruined the mood. But the night ended with good humor.. (And a broken camera. )
Kankuro blinked. "Um,maybe you accidently had some of Temari's cooking?"
From the other room,a loud,female's voice called out,"I heard that,you know!"
Kankuro laughed nervously,making Gaara give him a small,annoyed glare. "Uh,yeah.. I'll be outside."
Mel rolled her eyes. But at a glance at Gaara's worried crystalline eyes, she sighed. "A lot of things are wrong." she murmured sadly. She looked out the window, at the dimming sky. Soon, it would be soon. She sighed again. "Damn, I hate this." She murmured.
Suddenly,the door slammed open. Three Sunagakure ninjas filed into the room,all wearing an idenitical expression. "Kazekage,the village is under attack!"
One of the ninjas nodded vigourously,before speaking,"It's those people with the red clouds on black cloaks.. The Akatsuki!"
Gaara narrowed his eyes,before standing up from his chair. He turned to Melody,giving her a frown. "I have to go.."
Mel narrowed her eyes, knowing her time had come. She threw the ninja out and closed the door with wind, glad she'd taken a pill this morning or that would have gotten out of hand. She crossed her arms over her chest. "No. Don't. Let the ninja take care of it. The Akastuki only want one thing Gaara, and you know damn well what it is." she snapped. Lightly, she touched his arm. "Please, don't go.... Don't try to be the hero for once." she whispered.
A few minutes before..
The blonde haired Akatsuki member and dark haired teenager sat on a small clay bird,a few hundred feet from the ground. Muffin felt sick,being so above from the ground.. Deidara clicked something on his eye gadget,before mumbling to himself. "One.. Two.. Three. Aha,un!" He adjusted it so that he could pinpoint the guards on the watchtower. "Three are skyguards,yeah.." Muffin blinked,wondering what were skyguards.. Deidara continued,the mouth in his palms chewing more clay,forming small,spider like creatures. "I guess I'll make a sneak attack here,un.." Deidara made a hand seal,grinning widely. "Kai!"
Meanwhile..
Gaara sighed. "It's.. My duty as kazekage. I'm the protector of the village.. I can't just ignore this and let innocent people die. I'm sorry." The red head took the teenager by surprise by giving a a small hug,before rushing out the door and disappearing down the halls. "Gaara, your wrong if you think I'm gonna let you do this!" She screamed and started to run after him, but was knocked unconscious by a hard sand fist and then gently laid down on his chair, wrapped up so to keep her still.
Suddenly,a big explosion took place,startling Muffin and the onlookers within a five mile radius. Muffin laughed nervously. "Er.. You're not planning on killing anybody though,right? Um.. Right?" Deidara ignored her as he continued letting his palms chew clay,making her sweat drop. Suddenly,a clay,spider like creature fell onto one of the Suna skyguards.
"What the.." He tried taking it off of his face,before he accidently tripped over his own feet. "This damn thing won't get off!"
Deidara,a few hundred feet above,smirked. He made the hand sign,before exclaiming,"Art.. Is a bang!" The spider exploded,the man's blood spattering all over his post.
Muffin's eyes widened,as she turned to the blonde haired artist. "No,bad Deidara! No blowing up random people!" Deidara rolled his eyes,before sighing. He had enough of this annoying girl. Smiling evilly,Deidara kicked Muffin in the shin. Muffin yelped,too absorbed in her knee's pain to notice what was happening. Deidara took this moment to elbow her into the gut,and thus the dark haired teen fell off the clay bird. "Oh,crap!"Muffin exclaimed,way too surprised to think clearly. Suddenly,sand engulfed her,making her blink. "Eh?" T
he sand neared a small building,before slowly dispersing. Muffin blinked,before glancing at the building located above her. A red haired Suna ninja stood tall,his arms folded across his chest. Gaara. Muffin laughed sheepishly. "Wow,thanks.." Deidara,having landed a few buildings away,blinked in confusion. "Huh?"
Gaara glared at Diedara, befor glancing at Muffin. "Get back." he said simply and then let his attention focus back on the threat at hand. Gaara's hand jerked forward,his sand flying north in Deidara's direction. Deidara's clay bird took off again,while Gaara followed on his sand,trailing close behind. Muffin blinked again,completely at lost at what just happened.. Wait.. Melody! Where's Melody? Muffin whirled her head in various directions,before staring in the direction the two ninjas headed to. Melody went to Gaara.. So Gaara must know where she is,right? Muffin frowned,watching them fight,wondering how she was going to ask him..
While peering at him,she saw a famillar face: Kankuro. Muffin glanced down at the building she was on,wondering how she was going to get down.. Muffin shrugged,before walking to the nearest pipe. She saw this in all the movies,why wouldn't it work now? Muffin jumped onto the pipe,before sliding down.. Well,she slid down,but only six feet before the screws gave up. Muffin yelped as she fell five more feet,and fell onto the ground. "Ow.." Muffin shook her head,before running over to the kitty clad Suna ninja.
"Er,hey,dude!" Seeing that he didn't notice, Muffin used a different approach. "Hey,Kankuro!" He still didn't take notice,making he scowl. "Kitty clad dude!" Kankuro inclined his head to the dark haired teenager,wearing a scowl. "What?"
Muffin grinned. "Wow,it's funny how you only answer to that.. Hey,this is really urgent.. I need you to take me to Melody." Muffin silently hoped that he knew who she was,as she broke in nervous sweat.
Meanwhile....
"Er, I do believe that this is breaking and entering Sasuke..." Suigetsu said and Sasuke slipped in through the now broken window. Sasuke rolled his eyes and looked around. There she was! Suigetsu and Karin followed closely behind the Uchiha, while Juugo stayed on the roof to look out for Suna citizens. Sasuke rolled his eyes,ignoring the comment. The raven haired Uchiha neared the office,staring intently at the light brown haired teen. This was his chance...
"So,how do you know Mel again?"Said a voice from a few feet away.
"Mel's my best friend,duh!"Said another voice that was famillar to the emo avenger. That was the other target; but Sasuke couldn't confront them yet, because of the third voice.
"Damn, hn.." Sasuke mumbled under his breath. Karin blinked in surprise,before turning to the dark haired Uchiha. "Sasuke-kun,we need to go now!" Sasuke sighed,before following the rest of his team out of the office,through the window.
Kankuro and Muffin entered the office,while they took in the surroundings. "Mel! Er,Mel,are you okay? You don't look so well.." Muffin exclaimed.
Kankuro rolled his eyes. "She's unconscious,and restrained by sand,of course she's not alright."
"Mghm..." Mel muttered and her hands twitched. "Mghm, mmh, gh..."
Kankuro sighed,before his hands formed a hand seal. "Release." He mumbled. A few moments later,the sand started to dissolve.
Muffin ran over to the light brown haired teenager's side,before shaking her left arm. "Hey,Mel,wake up! Er,do you think she needs sugar?"
Kankuro gave her a look,before he shook his head. Then he grinned evilly,an idea coming to mind. "Here,let me try.. Oi,Mel,Gaara's a few feet away,and er.. Um,shirtless?"
Muffin sweat dropped. "Is that even going to work?"
Mel's eyes twitched but nothing else. "Ugh..." she muttered and her hands formed fists. "Ngh..."
Suddenly,the door jerked open,with a chunnin filing through. "Kankuro! The kazekage got kidnapped!"
Mel's eyes jerked open and she jumped up, eyes wide. "No!" she shouted. Then she blinked. "Er... Muffin? What the hell?"
"Yay,you're awake!"Muffin said,before clapping her hands happily.
Kankuro sweat dropped. "Is she always like this?" he asked nobody in particular. Kankuro sighed,before turning to the ninja. "Do you have anything to track him with?"
The ninja shook his head,and frowned. "No,but we know that the Akatsuki member disappeared with his clay bird north west of here. Wait,you're seriously not thinking of going,aren't you? You'll die out there!"
Kankuro clenched his fist,before nodding vigourously. "We need to,he's my brother!"
The chunnin shook his head,"No,you'll be by yourself,you wouldn't be able to win!"
Mel stood up, smiled a hello to Muffin and then went to stand by Konkuro. "But he won't be alone. I'll be with him. I'm not going to let Die- those pesky Akatsuki members take Gaara!" Melody finished quickly. She grinned over at Muffin. "Want to tag along?" she asked happily, hoping her friend would say yes.
"Duh! I don't want to be left behind again." Muffin said,receiving a strange stare from Kankuro.
"Um,how well do you two know each other? You know what? That isn't important right now,we need to leave this exact moment if we're to catch up.." Muffin and Melody nodded,before following Kankuro out of the office,leaving a confused chunnin behind.
"But,Kankuro-san,wait! This is bad.." He sighed,before disappearing down the halls as well.
Meanwhile..
A blonde haired,fan wielding Suna ninja drank a cup of tea. Suddenly,the tea cup cracked,making Temari frown in result. "I have a feeling that something bad is going to happen.."
Kankuro, Melody and Muffin ran through the gates of the village,sand etched deeply into their shoes. Kankuro stopped,before narrowing his eyes at the sight in front of him. Gaara laid unconscious,slung over the shoulder of a blond haired Akatsuki member. Sasori, still in his scorpion armored puppet suit,frowned. "What are these brats doing here?"
Deidara scowled,before mumbling under his breath,"I thought I got rid of her,un.."
Melody grinned. "Can't get rid of us that easy. Now give Gaara back!" she shouted, fist raised. A soft wind blew at the Akatsuki, making their cloaks billow.
Sasori turned to Deidara, before nodding at the red head. "Take the container,I'll catch up with you shortly after I get rid of these brats.. I don't like keeping people waiting,after all."
Kankuro raised a brow,his frown deepening. "Hey,Gaara isn't going anywhere if I have a say in it!"
Mel sighed. "The fact is, you don't, Konkuro." she muttered and watched as Diedara flew off. She watched helplessly as her sugar buddy was whisked away to his death. This was bad. Konkuro's jaw clenched as he tried to send Crow after his little brother. He didn't get to,though,because the puppet turned to the two girls instead. It swung a punch at Melody,who dodged it narrowly,making Kankuro blink in surprise.
"Er,I didn't do that,I swear!" Kankuro sighed,before controlling his puppets to swing at the red haired puppetmaster. It caught on Sasori's cloak,and ripped a piece of cloth off,but otherwise didn't cause any damage.
Sasori chuckled,before shaking his head. "That is because I'm controlling them."
Kankuro blinked,confused. "B-But,how..?"
Sasori rolled his eyes,before whipping Kankuro with the point of his tail. A purple like substance entered his body, making Muffin cringe. "You cannot attack with a puppet made by its own puppet maker." Kankuro's eyes widened in surprise,his vision blurring. "That's how I know the puppet inside and out.. But I'm honored though,that my master pieces had been passed down to the younger generations. Luckily for you,your death should be quick." Sasori turned to the two teenaged girls,before raising his brow. "As for you two.. I'll leave you alone,on Pain's orders." And with that,the puppet master disappeared into the dunes of sand.
Muffin rubbed the back of her head nervously."Um,do you think kitty clad heard that last part?"
"Uhg.." Kankuro groaned,making Muffin sweat drop.
"I guess not.. Er,I think we should bring him to the infirmary.. And we should take the cloth,too,so that Kaka-sensei can track them down. Um,Mel,are you alright?"
Mel looked in the direction where Sasori and Deidara had walked/flew off. Her jaw was clenched painfully hard. Gaara.... please understand... she thought and then turned to Muffin. She nodded slowly. "Let's get him back. I'll pick up his arms and you pick up his feet." she said and bent down to grab Konkuro.
Muffin nodded,before grabbing his ankles. "It's okay,Mel,I'm sure that they'll understand and let us tail them.." About twenty minutes later,the two teenage girls returned to Sunagakure,with a unconscious kitty clad ninja in tow. A crowd of ninjas surrounded the three ninjas,all wearing frowns.
"Where's the kazekage?"One called.
"How did you fail to bring him back?"Called another.
Suddenly,more and more hollars were called,to the point that Muffin couldn't hear herself think. "Silence!" Said a loud,female voice. The owner of the voice made way through the crowd,and blinked at Kankuro. "Where is Gaara? And what happened to Kankuro?"
One of the chunnins frowned. "Temari-san,kazekage-sama is.."
Melody frowned. "They took him, Temari. And we couldn't get him back because Konkuro was poisoned by Sa- uh... some Akastuki member." Then she blinked. "Eh, how was the Chunin Exam thingy?" she asked as an after-thought, causing several ninjas to sweat drop. Temari clenched her fist.
"What ?! Why didn't anybody tell me?!" The ninjas laughed nervously,making Temari sigh. "The council just sent a messenger bird to Konohagakure. Reinforcements should arrive in a few days.. You two,take Kankuro to the hospital,I'm sure the nurses can heal him."She said,not knowing how serious the poison that effected her younger turned to Melody and Muffin,before raising a brow. "Um,Melody,who's this?"
Melody grinned. "This is Muffin, she's my bestest friend!" she said proudly, pointing to her dark haired friend. Muffin grinned,before waving.
"Yeah,I'm Muffin!"
Temari gave her a deadpanned expression. "Muffin?" Muffin ignored the look,and continued smiling. Suddenly,two tall ninja grabbed the teenage girls by the shoulders,and shackled them.
Temari blinked. "What's the meaning of this?"She exclaimed.
A jonin narrowed his eyes on the two teenagers,before turning to Temari. "They're being arrested of suspicion of knowing the Akatsuki,by orders of the council."
Temari frowned,"They can't do this!"
The jounin shrugged,"Since Kazekage-sama isn't here,they're automatically in charge.."
Temari scowled. "But there's no evidence of them being spies!"
He frowned. "Well,isn't it suspicious that the first girl arrived two days before the attack? And that one arrived during it? I'm sorry Temari-san,but they're guilty until proven innocent." After saying that,the two,tall ninjas shoved them through the crowds and towards the direction of the prison.
Muffin blinked. "Er.. What just happened?"
Mel was purely just pissed off. "Let me go! I'm no spy! Neither is Muffin! Temari do something! LET ME GO!" she started screaming and kicking.
The jounin sighed. "You have the right to remain silent. Anything and everything you say will be used against you."
Muffin sweat dropped, before nodding in agreement with her friend. "Yeah,what Mel said!"
Temari couldn't see them through the crowd of people,but watched as the tall ninjas disappeared in the crowd.
A certain blonde haired ninja slammed his fist down on the hokage's desk. "What do you mean Gaara got kidnapped,dattebayo?!"
Tsunade rubbed her forhead's temples with an annoyed expression,before scowling at Naruto. "Shut up,brat! Yes,we got a memo that the Kazekage was kidnapped."
Naruto scowled at the age blond haired Hokage,before folding his arms across his chest. "When was this, dattebayo?! Why didn't you tell me sooner?!"
A pink haired kunoichi sweat dropped,before head locking the blond teen,and putting on a fake smile. She laughed nervously. "Okay,Tsunade-sama,we'll leave immediately!" Inner Sakura was breaking in nervous sweat, 'Doesn't he know how she is when she's mad?!'
After team seven had left the office a few minutes later,the blond haired Hokage sighed. "I'm getting too old for this.."
Muffin and Melody were being pushed into a dark underground chamber. Muffin shuddered. "I don't think the unicorns have been here before..." she whispered to Melody, causing the guards to sweatdrop and question the girl's sanity. Melody nodded.
"This place gives me the creeps..." she agreed. Her eyes flashed around, glad for the few flickering flames that gave this place a gloomy light. But light none the less. She wouldn't be able to survive down here if it was completely dark. She sighed.
The jounin followed the two guards in,and watched as they slid the jail cell's door closed. The unfamillar jounin stood infront of the cell,blocking off half of the room's light. He narrowed his eyes on the young teenagers. "You're detained under the suspicion of being spies,and possibly aiding the Akatsuki into kidnapping the kazekage. Nothing will be entirely clear with out the kazekage and his older brother to clear is up."
"But we didn't help the Akastuki and we aren't spies, dammit!" Mel snapped. She was angry that all this had happened. She couldn't save Gaara, she couldn't help Konkuro and now she probably wouldn't get to thank Chiyo! This was all horrible. Mel sulked. The three ninjas ignored the outburst from the light brown haired girl,and exited the prison room. They closed the air tight door with a loud slam,making Muffin cringe. She laughed nervously.
"Er,don't worry Mel! Everything will work out in the end..I think." Melody sent her a look,making Muffin smile sheepishly. "Sorry,not helping."
A few hours later..
"Okay,I need some cloths and a basin of water." Sakura announced,hovering over the dark haired puppet controlling Suna ninja.
Temari,now concerned for her brother because she now knew how preciding the situation actually was,frowned. She turned to the ninjas beside her,and narrowed her sharp eyes. "Well,you heard the medic nin! A piece of cloth and a basin of water!"
Naruto watched the ninjas scramble out of the room to get the supplies. "Ne,Kakashi-sensei,what can we do to help,dattebayo?"
The silver haired jonin,too absorbed in his book to unglue his eyes from the page,shrugged. "We can only help them by staying out of the way and wait."
A male special jonin,who had been standing there,over heard the conversation,before frowning. "Actually,there is something you can do.."
Naruto grinned. "Yes, dattebayo! So what is it? Helping Sakura-chan by getting herbs? Or how about-" He started excitedly. the jonin sweatdropped and then said,
"Actually, we were wondering if you'd interview the two suspected spies of helping assist the Akatsuki kidnap the Kazekage. They're in cell 47. We just need some questions answered for the record you know... before the Kazekage get's back and decides their fate or Konkuro gets better and tells us what he knows." The jounin explained. He rose a brow and held out a clipboard. He did want to go near the crazy girls, so why not send the idiot blond ninja from the Leaf who wanted to help? It all worked out in the end... "What do you say?" he asked, smiling lightly.
"Sure thing, dattebayo! Anything to help Gaara!" Naruto said,his eyes turning from his excited mood into false determination. Kakashi sweat dropped,having an idea of what was going. An aged woman with gray dimples on her cheek stood up tiredly.
"I'm coming,too."
Kakashi raised a brow. "To help?"
She shook her head. "No,so I can see how bad Suna has gotten! Back in my day,you needed a visa to enter Suna,but now they let just about anyone in!"She laughed loudly,looking senile,making everybody in the room sweat drop.
"Chiyo,are you sure that's such a good idea?"Her aged brother asked,making her snort.
"Don't worry about me,brother! Now,lead on to the cell.."
The jounin nodded and smiled sincerely, glad that he wasn't going to be interviewing the teenagers. "Follow me." he said and led them through the town and then down a door into the musky underground. He stood by the guards. "Number fourty seven.... good luck, you'll need it." he muttered the last part.
Melody blinked. "Eh, Muffin, I think people are coming..." she told her friend. They were playing Rummy with some cards Muffin had made appear out of nowhere.
Muffin pouted. "Aw,but I was about to lay my cards down in melds!" She whined. She blinked,"Er,you don't think Suna people know how to play,do you?" The air tight door slammed open,before revealing a few familiar looking faces.
Mel looked up, surprised. "Eh, Naruto?" she asked, head tilted. Then she shut her mouth quickly. Woops, she wasn't supposed to know his name! Ergh, excuse, excuse, think of a damn excuse!! Mel thought to herself.
The blonde haired teenager blinked. "Whoa,you know my name? Do I know you,dattebayo?"
Melody shook her head quickly,before speaking out the only thing that came to mind; "Er.. Gaara told me about you! That's,um,exactly how I know your name.."
Muffin nodded in agreement,not entirely sure of what she was talking about. Naruto coughed,before he got serious. He narrowed his eyes,frowning. "You guys know about the people that took Gaara. I demand you to tell me where they are,dattebayo! And you better tell me! If you don't,I'll beat it outta've ya,dattebayo!"
Melody grinned. "Okay,sure."
Naruto blinked." Sure,as in 'I'm going to say sure,and then attack you from behind' sure?"
Melody rolled her eyes, "No,I meant I'll help you."
Naruto fell anime style. "Oh.. I knew that,dattebayo! Heh,heh.. Wait,you know Gaara? Aren't you guys the spies or something,dattebayo?" Before the teenagers could answer,the jounin spoke,his eyes narrowed.
"I think we should start the interview now!"
Mel glared at him, her happiness gone. "Shut it, I'm talking to my idol!" she snapped. Then she turned back to Naruto and grinned. "Yeah! I know Gaara-kun very well. Even ask Konkuro... er, when he's well again that is... How is he doing?" she whispered, concerned for the kitty clad Suna puppet master.
"He should be fine." Kakashi said, his eyes never leaving the pages of his book. Naruto nodded,before pulling out a chair that the two teens didn't notice he had before.
"Okay,dattebayo! Er,what's the first question of the clipboard?" Naruto squinted his eyes,but couldn't read it well,especially in the dark.
"I believe it says 'What are the suspected spies names'?" Kakashi said,his nose buried into his book. Muffin wondered how he knew that if he never averted his eyes from the page.
"Yeah,dattebayo! What's your names? My name is Uzumaki Naruto,and I'm going to be hokage,dattebayo!" He pumped a fist in the air,dropping the clip board,before accidently stumbling backwards off the chair. "I meant to do that,dattebayo.." The jounin sweat dropped, having second thoughts on letting the blond interview them.
Melody chuckled. "Yeah, I know. I'm Melody Char and I'm.... kinda bored." she said, shrugging. She watched Naruto sit back up and then grinned at Muffin with a look that said, 'It's Naruto! It's Naruto-nii! Can you believe this!?' Muffin nodded vigorously,having an identical wide, energetic grin.
"And I'm Muffin! I like sugar!" Kakashi,the jounin, Chiyo, and Naruto sweat dropped,
"..." Naruto blinked,before tilting his head,confused. "Muffin?"
She scowled,before nodding vigorously. "Yes,Muffin. Hey,Naru,can I ask you a question?"
The blonde haired teenager shrugged,before nodding. "Shoot,dattebayo."
Muffin grinned."Do you believe in unicorns?"
The jonin sighed,before shaking his head. "Enough of this nonsense,and just read the next question.."
Melody glared at the jounin. "I said shut it!" she snapped, before blowing him backwards a few feet. "Stupid jounin, I knew I didn't like since the moment he pushed me down here..." she muttered. Then she sighed. "Now, do you? I do."
Naruto shrugged. "Yeah sure, dattebayo! I like ramen though! Do you?"
Mel grinned again. "Hell yeah!" she said happily. "I live off the stuff! Only... not lately. Suna doesn't have any good ramen..." she pouted. Naruto hugged the light brown haired teenager's leg,before crying anime tears. Well,not all of her leg,because the cell restricted him from doing so.
"Finally,somebody that understands,dattebayo!" The jonin coughed loudly,making Naruto laugh nervously. "Oops.. Sorry,dattebayo. Er,next question.. How old are you guys,and when's your birth date?"
Muffin blinked. "October 10,1994." Muffin grinned goofily. "I just turned sixteen." She nodded happily.
Naruto blinked. "Whoa,that's my birthday too,dattebayo! What about you,Mel?"
Melody tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Um... June 16th, 1994. I'll turn sixteen soon though, Naruto-nii." she nodded.
Naruto nodded,before writing it slowly on the clipboard. He blinked. "Er,how do you spell October,dattebayo?"
Kakashi sweat dropped. "Isn't that the month you were born,Naruto?"
Naruto scowled. "Shut up,Kakashi-sensei! So,how do you spell it?"
Muffin grinned,"O-C-T-O-B-E-"
"Enough! Just ask the next question!" The jounin said,getting annoyed.
"But.. What about the question thing?"Naruto asked,blinking.
The jonin sighed. "I'll edit it later,just ask the next question.."
Mel glared at the jounin. "I thought I blew you away... Heh heh, that sounded different than the way I meant it." she chuckled and then rolled her head. "So, Naruto-nii, what's the next question?"
"It says.. Er.. That does say village,doesn't it,dattebayo?" Naruto blinked,before laughing nervously at the jounin's anime vein that was throbbing on his forehead. "Er,yeah,it does! Heh, heh... It says what is the name of your original village?"
Muffin blinked. "Um.. Los Angeles,California?" Melody elbowed her,making Muffin laugh sheepishly herself. "I mean,uh.. We're travellers,and were born in a small no name village?" Muffin said,half hoping that they'll buy it.
"Oh,okay,dattebayo!"Naruto said,oblivious to the jounin who face palmed his forhead.
Chiyo grinned. "This is better then cable!"
Melody blinked, having for the first time noticed the elder woman. She got up and smiled at Chiyo. "Eh, Chiyo-san, I er... just want to say... thank you for the future." Mel said, rubbing the back of her head nervously, half hoping she didn't sound nuts and the other half knowing she sounded nuts.
Chiyo blinked. "Eh? Child,I'm old and wearing out the rest of my days,there's no future left for me!"She said,grinning toothily,oblivious to what she really meant.
Muffin coughed loudly,noticing her friend was uncomfortable. "Hey,Naruto,any more questions? Perferably 'bout sugar,but what ever floats your boat."
Naruto shrugged,before flipping the page. "There's a few more questions,dattebayo! Ne,no offense,but these questions are kinda boring!"Naruto whined.
The jounin glared,annoyed. "Just finish them."He snapped.
Naruto pouted."Fine,fine,dattebayo. It says Melody has a knowledge of ninja abilities,and it askes if Muffin knows any and where you learned it from."
"Dude, so many big words..." Melody muttered to her friend. "Did you understand any of that?" she whispered, kinda loudly. Muffin shook her head.
"Nope! But let's pretend like we do,before that angry looking jonin dude gets his panties in a wad.." Muffin shook her head. "No,I don't. I completely fail as a ninja. Epic fail." Muffin nodded happily. "Mel learned her ninja abilities from.. Er.. Travelling. Yes,er,travelling. She has had many senseis and mentors,that,um,taught her new tricks?" To an extent, it was true. Watching Naruto,you watch various ninjas perform different techniques.. So it wasn't a complete lie.
Naruto nodded,before writing it down. "Okay,dattebayo,this one askes if you-" Suddenly,the door slammed open. It revealed a pink haired medic ninja and a dark haired puppet controlling nin, with a worried Temari following close behind.
"You shouldn't overwork yourself too much and just let your body rest and heal!"Sakura called.
Temari nodded. "Kankuro,she's right,you shouldn't do tha.. What's the runt doing here?"
Naruto scowled. "I ain't a runt,dattebayo!"
Sakura fixed her black gloves, before smiling. "Well, I already collected some herbs that can be used as an antidote for the posion if that is to happen again."
Kakashi raised a brow. "So,we're ready to go?"
Sakura nodded. Naruto turned to the two teenaged girls,before grinning goofily. "It was nice meeting you,dattebayo!"
The jounin sighed."You're not supposed to talk to the enemy like she's your friend.."
Naruto didn't catch that,though,and waved. "See you later! 'Cause right now,I'm going to bring back Gaara,dattebayo!" Naruto rushed out of the room,followed by Kakashi,Chiyo,and Sakura. The jounin sighed,before picking up the clipboard the blond had discarded.
"I'm sorry Temari-san,Kankuro-san,but we need to go. I only have authorization to let that blonde kid in. Besides,I need to question Kankuro about some things."
Melody waved. "Bye Naruto-nii!" she laughed. Then her gaze snapped to Konkuro. She rushed to the bars. "Konku-san! How are you! You should be resting dammit! If you strain your body, then you'll get even more ill. And Gaara wont be too happy about that when he finds out." Mel said, nodding her head. "Now, tell the mean jounin that we're innocent!"
Kankuro nodded,before turning to the ninja and saying the exact words Melody had told him to say. "They're innocent!"
The jounin sweat dropped. "Well, what exactly happened?"
Kankuro shrugged. "Well,Gaara,Mel,and I were in his office,and I left a few minutes before Suna was attacked. After it was,Gaara came out of nowhere,and started fighting him. Then that Muffin girl came and demanded to be taken to Melody. So we found her unconscious in the room,restrained by sand. I released her,and we all went to tail Gaara. I fought Sasori,but I fell unconscious.." Kankuro breathed deeply,before frowning. "Wow,that was a mouth full."
The jonin raised a brow. "Why would kazekage-sama retrain her with her sand? What if he realized she was betraying him? Why would he restrain her the exact moment Suna was attacked,hm?"
"Because I wanted to stop him! He was exactly what the Akatsuki was after because of the one-tail!" Melody answered angrily, causing the ground to shake. Mel stood up and gripped the bars. "You suspicious bastard, I would never hurt Gaara-kun!" she shouted.
The jounin rose a brow. "How do we know what you say is the truth? Nobody was there with you in Gaara's office when this happened. You could be lying to us." he snapped. Mel's jaw clamped together in anger and fury washed through her heart. Her hands clenched uselessly at the prison bars. She wished desperately she had some of her meds.... "I apologize, but we cannot take any more action." The jonin said,before shooing the Suna siblings through the door. "Do not worry,hopefully it'll only be another few more days."The jonin said.
Kankuro blinked,before sighed. "But what if Gaara doesn't.. Doesn't come back?"
The jonin shrugged,"Then they will stay here until they get a trial. It can take anywhere between a week and six months. Then the council could decide weither to let them go or to be jailed for life." He said,before pushing a frowning Temari and Kankuro through the door. He turned to the two teenaged girls,raising a brow. "Supper will arrive in a few hours." The door slammed closed, making some of the dust on the ceiling crumble and fall.
Muffin blinked. "Er.. What now?"
Mel pouted and fell on the ground, arms crossed. She dug into her pocket, glad to find a pill stashed there. She faked a yawn and swallowed the pill, glad that her emotions calmed down instantly. She sighed. "Dude, this is really sad, but I'd rather be with Sasuke right now!" Muffin's eyes widened.
"?!" The dark haired teenager suddenly made a bag of sugar appear out of nowhere,before placing it in her arms. "Dude,you need this more then I do!" Muffin blinked when she saw the serious expression on her friend's face. "Really? Er,so you can poke fun at his buttbow?"
"Yeah, I guess, it'd be better than sitting in a jail cell!" she snapped. Then frowned. "Eh, Sasuke, you stalker, if your around, spring us!" she shouted. Nothing responded. "Damn." she muttered Muffin sweat dropped.
"Be careful Mel,the unicorns are in charge of the emos too,you know!" Melody rolled her eyes. Muffin wiped a bead of sweat from her brow,before grinning goofily. "Sorry,I thought you were actually serious! Thank the unicorns.. Er,when do you think we'll get out of here?"
Melody sighed,before running her fingers through her hair. "Hell if I know.."
Meanwhile..
"You sick bastard,bring Gaara back,dattebayo!"Naruto shouted,trailing a grinning Deidara,who held Gaara's body on his clay bird as bait.
"Angry,un?"
Kakashi frowned,before stopping Naruto with his hand. "Stop,Naruto. Getting mad won't help him." Kakashi pulled up his Konoha headband,revealing his Sharingan. "Get back,Naruto.."
About a thousand kilometers away,a blue skinned Akatsuki member grinned sharkishly. "You worried about them,Itachi?"
Itachi looked at his partner. "Who?" he asked.
"About those two teenaged girls."Kisame answered. Since Tobi and Zetsu left a few days a ago,and Kakuzu and Hidan left the night Melody disappeared for a mission in Kumo,and Deidara,Sasori,and Muffin left the day before yesturday,the entire Akatsuki base was silent. (Although,Kisame noted that Pain's room was oddly quiet in general for the past few days.)
Itachi nodded. "Yes, I do worry about them. Diedara said nothing about Muffin, so it appears she's disappeared too. But..." Itachi fell silent and a small smile appeared on his usually stoic face. "I think that they'll be ok." he finished quietly.
"Er,do you have a five?" Muffin asked,holding a deck of cards.
Melody shook her head. "Nope,goldfish.." Melody silently hoped that Gaara would return soon.. Because A), she was woried. And B), she was completely bored out of her mind. Melody sighed. "Do you have an ace?"
About a hundred kilometers away, a pink haired ninja towered over the red haired kazekage. She shook her head sadly,her expression turning grim. "I-I.. I'm sorry,Naruto."
The blonde haired teenager felt the salt water leak from his eyes,before he ran over to the red haired kazekage's side. "Gaara,wake up,dammit! Wake up!"
A few hundred kilometers outside Suna, a raven haired Uchiha finally sneezed. Karin fixed her eyes on Sasuke. "Are you sure your not getting a cold, Sasuke-kun?" she asked, a little worried. He'd been sneezing a lot lately.
Suigetsu rolled his eyes. "No, I guess he's just a real good conversation subject lately." he nodded.
"Shut up, hn! Nobody is talking about me.."Sasuke mumbled under his breath. He shuddered when he remembered his 'Sasuke fan club' back home. Now he really didn't want to know who was talking about him. "..."
"Gaara,you're alive!"Naruto exclaimed. The red haired kazekage blinked, a surprised look on his face. He was completely speechless. Naruto grinned,before turning to the aged Suna woman. "Wow,thank you,old healing lady,I.. Er,wow,she's that tired? Must be from all the work she put into that jutsu,dattebayo!" Sakura slowly shook her head,tears falling down her face.
"No, Naruto, she's.. She's dead."
Naruto blinked. "W-What?"
Konkuro nodded,before walking over to the lifeless elder. "Yes,that was Chiyo-sama's forbidden jutsu.. In order to save Gaara's life,she had to use her own."
Naruto blinked. "...."
Melody huffed. "Damn, you win again! Your really good at this game, you know." Melody said, dropping her last few cards; a Jack, Queen and King. She passed over the last of her sugar, frowning. "Are you sure this is how you play poker?" she asked.
Muffin nodded innocently. "Of course, Mel! How else could a person play poker?" Muffin smiled evilly,her mouth hidden by her cards. Inside her sleeves was more then half of the deck's good cards. Muffin coughed awkwardly. "So,er,wanna play again?"
Melody shrugged. "Eh, sure, why not? It's not like we get to do anything else in this pit!" she laughed.
Muffin grinned,before shuffling the deck of cards. "So,when do you think Naruto and Gaara are going to come back?"Muffin asked,pouting. She was as bored as Melody. Melody shrugged. "Maybe the unicorns will break us out of our jail cell?" Muffin asked hopefully,because she did not want to be here more then she needed to.
Mel sighed and scratched her head. Damn, it better be soon... I'm so fuckin bored! Melody nodded. "Yeah, the unicorns know best! They rule the universe.... Hm, do you think the plushy was a unicorn spy?" she asked randomly.
Muffin nodded vigorously. "Duh! Why else would a rainbow plsuhy bring us here and give us super duper powers?" Muffin grinned when she realized she had a royal flush. "Checkmate!"Muffin exclaimed. Then she blinked. "Wait,isn't that for chess? Oops.. Oh well!"
"Eh, I understood. Dude, what's taking them so long?!" she exclaimed, crossing her arms over her chest. A grumpy expression flitted over her face.
"..Taking who so long?" said a voice from the door. The red haired kazekage,the blonde haired teen,the pink haired medic,and Gaara's two older siblings stood in the doorway.
"We're back,dattebayo!"
Temari nodded. "After we got Gaara back,after we told him what happened,he rushed over here."
Mel grinned and jumped up. "You, silly! We were wondering how long it'd take you to get back? So, how was the afterlife? Was it.... nani? Why are you looking at me like that?" Melody said, looking at all the blank stares she was getting.
Muffin laughed nervously. "Er.. Mel is just, um, psychic, that's how she knows alot of things!" Muffin nodded vigorously.
Naruto blinked,"Whoa,really,dattebayo? Tell me my future!"
Melody tapped her chin,before grinning widely. "You're going to become hokage!"
Naruto's eyes widened,before pointing to the light brown haired teen. "Whoa! She's good,dattebayo!"
Kankuro rolled his eyes,"..."
Mel shook her head. "Actually, we could hear pretty well what goes on on the surface world. Rocks made good conductors!" she clapped her hands happily. Then she put on a serious face. "Now let me out. I have to go pee." Gaara's face turned red,before he nodded at the cell. Kankuro shrugged,before taking the keys and opening the jail cell. The bar door slid open,before the two teenaged girls exited the cell. Mel started to run. "BATHROOM!" she shouted and ran out the door.
Naruto sweat dropped. "Is she always that eccentric, dattebayo?" he whispered to Muffin.
Muffin nodded happily. "Yep! But don't worry,you get used to it!"
The blond haired ninja gave her a dead panned expression. "..."
As the group of ninjs exited the jail cell,Muffin frowned. "Er,what happens now? Is there a trial with the council? Paperwork to be done? Anything?"
Temari shook her head. "No,the questions the runt asked you was enough for the council. Although they were a bit confused about your name.. Anyway,the point is no,there's nothing that needs to be done."
Melody came back a few minutes later and met them outside the dark musky jail place. "So, like, what do we do now?" she asked them, still kinda bored.
Naruto tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Well, granny said that we didn't need to go back to Konoha until another few days,dattebayo.. So we should do something!"
Sakura raised a brow. "Like what?"
Naruto shrugged,before grinning widely. "We should get ramen,dattebayo!"
Kankuro's eyes widened,before shaking his head quickly. "Sorry,there's somewhere I need to be. Later." He quickly fled, making everybody sweat drop.
Temari nodded,before pointing at her younger sibling. "Uh.. What was that,Kankuro? You need me? Coming!" She ran off before Gaara could blink.
Naruto shrugged. "Well,I guess it's just us,dattebayo!"
Melody grinned. "Okay, but let me grab my bag first." she laughed and then blinked as an idea hit her. "Actually..." she started and grinned. "Muffin can you pop me my bag?" she asked, blinking. "Pleeeease?" she begged.
Naruto blinked,"Er,pop,dattebayo?"
Muffin shrugged. "Yeah,sure,why not?" Muffin rubbed her temples,before she tried to think hard. (Which was a task in itself for the dark haired teenager.) Suddenly,the bag appeared out of nowhere,in a cloud of smoke.
Naruto blinked. "Eh,how did she do that?"
Melody grinned and grabbed the bag before it fell to the dusty ground. "Thanks, Muffin-chan." she said happily before patting the bag. She put it over her shoulders happily.
Suddenly, a Suna ninja came up. "Leaf Nin?" he asked. Naruto blinked.
"Er,yeah,that's me,dattebayo! What's up?"He said informally, making the Suna ninja sweat drop.
"You are your teammates, there is another Leaf nin here to see you. At the gates." he said and then poofed away.
Mel blinked. "Woah, I want to learn how to do that!" she said, jumping up and down excitedly.
Gaara chuckled and gave the light haired girl a small smile. "Don't worry,you'll be able to do that with time."
The pink haired medic ninja shrugged,before nodding at the blond haired teenager. "I guess we should go see who that is, huh?" The group nodded,before heading in the direction of the gates.
Meanwhile....
Kakuzu sat on the branch of a tree, caculating his money via caculator, because he didn't bring his money with him. He didn't want to ruin his money if it were to rain,after all. Well,the money he had left. Those stupid brats destroyed most of his life savings. Kakuzu sat in a tree right near their room. They had just got back from their mission in Kumogakure, after all. He was stacking them outside because he was too hot,and he didn't want to pay for A/C.
Suddenly, the lights in the room turned on. Kakuzu narrowed his eyes,before stopping his money managing. "Hidan.. Where the hell are you going in this god forsaken hour?! When you turn on the lights,it runs up the electric bill!"
The silver haired Jashinist smirked,holding a large straw hat in hand. "I'm fucking getting a damn scrifice,so calm the fuck down. You fuckin' know that those damn bitches can't resist my hoe hat, you dumbass!" Kakuzu snorted, before rolling his eyes. After Hidan turned around, he noticed that his hat... was... missing? Hidan's smile faded as he grew an anime vein. "Who the fuck stole my damn pimpin' hoe hat?!"
Bittersweet: Hope you enjoyed,and thanks for reading! (Waves.)