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The Great Lina Inverse In:
How Harry Found out His Past Life Was Female
or
Lina Inverse Rides Again
A.K.A.
FATE SUCKS
Harry James Potter was having an odd day, even for the week before Halloween. First he woke up from a dream where someone who laughed like his aunt had summoned several golems to attempt to defeat an orc. Orcs had long since gone extinct, as he had learned from his aunt's lessons and training. Then, hours later at lunch, a ministry official name Deloris Umbridge had attempted to arrest him for the kidnap of Albus Dumbledore. It was only due to Headmistress McGonagall being there that she hadn't been roasted by a Burst Flare. As it was she would probably be treating frost bite for a few years. Most of the kids with parents working in the ministry cheered and Ron hugged him for taking out a, "Slimy, gitty, toad woman." At dinner Severus Snape had hexed the Minister of Magic for attempting to arrest him. He only said, "You saved me from a lifetime of servitude. I'm not so arrogant to think I can allow you to go to jail." He then sat back down and proceeded to eat his dinner calmly.
Now the Ministry had sent him an owl reading:
Dear Mr. Potter:
Following the events upon September 23 you are hereby expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. A Ministry representative will be by shortly to snap your wand and bind your sorcerous abilities.
Sincerely,
Mafalda Hopkirk
Improper Use of Magic Office
Harry, surprised at their stupidity, laughed. "Do they really want a war with the Sorcerer's Guild?" He asked as he summoned a parchment.
Dear Mafalda Hopkirk,
Please go right ahead and try. Unless you wish to battle a sorcerer then you should think twice.
Sincerely,
Harry Potter
Sorcerer and Wizard
Time and Space,
Bend to my will,
My Magic as a Source:
LETTER DELIVERY
A flash of bright light sent the letter spiralling into the office of one Mafalda Hopkirk. As she read the letter her eyes widened. 'This will have to go straight to Amelia!' She thought to herself as she charmed the letter to fly with a memo saying, 'For The Eyes of Amelia Bones Only.' A smaller memo was attached to the other memo.
Madam Bones was sitting in her office contemplating what her niece had told her. According to her Albus Dumbledore had been binding the magic of students for quiet a while. She had interviewed the heads of houses who had confessed that they had noticed a trend of weakening students and had set homework accordingly to attempt to improve their magical abilities. It had only been recently that Harry Potter, freshly unbound, had unbound the rest of the students and everyone was having problems controlling the now vast amounts of magic they had. The professors were assigning homework on control for three weeks and there were still small magical accidents. Including which the most funny, Susan had reported, was Neville accidentally transfiguring a hat onto Severus Snape's head. She saw the letter and the memos.
Someone has been forging my handwriting! Someone has also attempted to Expel Mr. Potter and Bind him! It could only have come from my department. We Must Get To The Bottom Of This! Mr. Potter has done nothing illegal or against the Hogwarts Charter.
Sincerely,
Mafalda Hopkirk
Improper Use of Magic
P.S. Stop any aurors from going to attempt to collect Mr. Potter. They won't survive.
P.S.S. Get them to tell which personnel authorised this outrage.
Amelia Bones reread the letter and then called all aurors into her office. They scrambled in one by one until all were present. "Who, pray tell, was going to attempt to apprehend Mr. Potter?"
Two hands were raised, Podmore and Dawlish. Both were incompetent and she wasn't quite sure how they passed auror training, aside from bribing whoever the trainer was ten years ago. "Good because you aren't going!"
They opened their mouths to protest until they saw her glare, "Further more you will either tell me who authorised your movement or I will use Veritiserum."
"You can't do that," Podmore started with Dawlish nodding his head emphatically, "You'll get sacked!"
"Oh, you will find I can and that I can't be sacked without a seventy five percent vote by the full Wizengamot," Madam Bones smiled, "So talk or I will be forced to use truth potion."
"Narcissa Malfoy," Dawlish said before Podmore hit him.
"Shut up idiot," Podmore yelled at him! "Lady Malfoy will get us fired!"
"Oh, you're now fired for going under the orders of a civilian and for moving to arrest a citizen without proper authorisation," Madam Bones said gleefully, "And now I have the information to go up against a Malfoy. I really should thank her for choosing someone as spineless as you, Dawlish."
Somewhere in Wiltshire a demur lady felt a shiver up her spine. "Dobby, close the window. Its too cold in here." She smirked as the elf popped in.
"Milady, the window be's closed." She turned and saw the windows, closed and fastened with the curtains closed.
"Then cast a mild warming charm on the room. Its far too cold in here."
"Yes Milady." the elf scrambled to do what his Mistress asked of him. "Would you like anything else Milady?" He asked, wanting to be of use so he wouldn't get punished.
"Yes, bring some hot chocolate, that'll warm me up," She said with a small smile on her painted red lips, "And summon Lucius here, we can discuss the fact that Draco has stopped antagonising that Potter Brat. Lucius wanted the Potter Brat to slip up, it won't happen without antagonism."
"Yes Milady." And her will be done.
Narcissa is our current evil queen, or at least our current cruel ice woman. She also doesn't think sorcerers are all that great, meaning that she doesn't get that she is condemning her family to death... Perhaps she'll wise up before it is too late. Then again she is a Black and most Blacks are insane.