Ha, this is early but i now have time to write, enjoy

Not forever

Npov

My mind has been rattling with this question for a while now. Roughly three months I believe. Senior year is just around the corner. One of my goals this summer is to have that important conversation with Zorion. I love Zorion and I know he loves me. The only problem is that he is human and he has not expressed the slightest inkling on being with me forever. In the human world love takes its course however in my world it like BAM! Together forever, true love. The flipside is that I may have to wait a century. But I want to be with Zorion. It's where my heart is, when it's not with Jacob, which now that I think about it, it's a lot. If this conversation doesn't go well then…. well I don't know what to expect I hope he feels for me enough to be with me forever. But this has been tugging at my mind a few weeks after Jacob got back. I've never felt so heart broken in all my young life. I now know that I don't do well when the ones I love are not there. I must stop playing around.

"Zorion." I grasp his attention instantly when the hesitation exited from my mouth. "I was wondering, well…um… how much do you love me?"

He raises his eyebrow at me. "Unconditionally." He replies. That's not what I was looking for, time to rephrase the question.

"Well you know everything about my family thus you know that I am going to be alive for a long time, outliving the general population time and time again. Would you want to live forever with me? Do you love me enough to live with me forever?" That's it. I've said it and now I am completely vulnerable. He hesitates for a few seconds. He seems to be searching for an answer. I guess he wouldn't or else he would have answered that question right away without much thinking. Now he looks like he has found his words but doesn't know if he truly wants to answer me honestly. "I would like your honest answer please." I say. I turn away from him. My head is ready to hang down, heavily defeated.

"Honestly Nessie, I have thought about it and I really don't see myself living forever. I mean I don't want to outlive my sisters or the rest of my family or my tribe. One life time is good enough for me. I do love you but I…. I want to grow old and grey. So I guess the second answer is I love you enough to set you free." Every word was cautiously spoken.

Silence may be golden but I don't like it. What's the point of being with someone if they have chosen a different life from yours? He wants a short life and I want him forever but that stupid line of letting love go… Dad let mom go but they're together. "Are you sure about your answer? Do you think it would change if you thought about it more?"

"I've been thinking about it ever since you told me that you would be living forever and it's a life style that I cannot wrap my head around." There's no point in dragging this date out any longer.

"Um, Zorion, do you wanna….ah, can you just leave? Can we separate for awhile?"

"Yeah, I think it's wise if I split for a while. Or better yet, just split, there is no point in dragging this out. I kinda knew it was coming. Honestly though I thought that we would at least make it to graduation. I'm sorry Renesme, but I really do love. I'll just let myself out."

The melancholy atmosphere is back again. I was desperately hoping for the conversation to go more differently and smoothly but it needed to be done. All too soon I hear the front door shut softly. Gathering myself together, I make my way into the kitchen for some cookie dough ice cream. Grandma is there fixing me a bowl already full of ice cream.

"Honey do you want to talk about It?" she asks. "How is he getting home? His sister dropped him off."

"I sure he is probably going to ask Jacob to take him home." I answer.

"Oh, ok then." She places the bowl in front of me.

"Thank you. So did you hear our conversation upstairs?"

"No honey, not really. I've learned to tune out other's conversations to allow people to have their privacy."

"We broke up."

"I figured that. Just before he left he said 'It was nice seeing you around but I will not be seeing you any more'."

"Oh, so you just decided to fix me a bowl of ice cream." I say with a smirk.

"Yes honey."

"Thank you Grandma. You're the best. Now what should I do?"

"What do you mean, 'what should you do'? Don't you have an in home date tonight?" Chimes my grandfather. He kisses grandma and makes his way to me, kissing me on my forehead. Then he notices. "Honey what's wrong? Did Zorion get sick and have to cancel?"

"No grandpa, we broke up." I can feel my mind wrapping itself around my first break up. But I don't want them to see me so upset again. Not so soon anyway.

"Oh, Honey I'm sorry. I guess that explains the ice cream then. Well then I will let you two talk it out." I feel like he wanted to get away before he said something wrong.

"Thanks but no thanks. I was about to go find something to do with myself." With that I was off back to my room. I wish everyone was not on their date night. But then again I'm glad they are. I don't want the rest of my family to have to see me in an upsetting mood once again. Granted, the pain I feel from Zorion and I breaking up doesn't even come close to the pain I felt when my Jacob left. Humph, I still can't explain why I was so heart broken by Jacob leaving. Honestly, I thought I would feel just as heartbroken and then some.

%%%

There was a Knock, knock at my door. "Who is it?" I ask quickly but with as much enthusiasm that I can muster up at the moment.

"Nessie's best friend!" yells Jake as he enters the room with a smile on his face. He's like sunshine. Moseying over to me, I see that he has his hand behind his back.

"What's behind your back Jacob?" By the sound of my voice I can tell that I had used up too much energy already. My true misery was revealing itself to me and him.

"I have sweets for my sweetie. See, your favorite candy, sour punch straws, sour patch kids, and two lollypops. Sorry but one is mine."

"Wow, thank you. I wasn't expecting this. I'm sorry I'm a mess."

"No need to apologize. I know what it's like to have your heart broken. Thus I have come up with the get well soon remedy. I don't like to see you sad."

"Well I hope it works cuz I feel really miserable right now."

"So, this is what we are going to do." Boy is he energetic at the moment. Well he did say that he doesn't like me dating.

"There's more?"

"Yeah, there's movie time. We are going to watch one of your favorite non-romance movies. So that leaves comedy cuz it's great to laugh and comedy 'cuz it's a part of my remedy. Then if you're still awake and not tired from all that laughing then I shall entertain you with an adventurous story with yours truly in the tale." His attitude and stance at the moment remind me of a jester ready to entertain the king and queen. Sigh my Jacob.

"Okay, wow, your acting like nothing has changed."

"You only have to wait until you're ready to receive the love that your meant to have." He says to me warm heartedly with loving eyes. "Until then you just get to ride the rollercoaster of life." He adds in a more upbeat tone. I guess he's right, break ups happen. Wait, he just made another side mark about love, what does that mean.

In response I smile. He makes his way to my DVD collection.

"Nope, na, somewhat funny, nada, no, no, nope. All you have up here are romantic comedies. LAAMMEEE. We need to watch a parody like Scary Movie."

"What about Zombieland? It was funny or Scott Pilgrim vs the World. That movie made me laugh."

"If I recall, he's fighting for a girl, it counts as a romance movie at the moment, Zombieland is about having a love experience." He starts thinking, "Let's see, oh Bebe's Kids, I have that in my room. Now for the next part, where would you like to watch the movie? Would you like to see it in your bed or would you like to see it on the floor? Would like to watch it here or would you like to watch it there? We could even watch it down the stairs. Would you like to see it with some coco or would you like to see it with coke?"

"Ok enough Jake. You can stop with the Dr. Seuss questioning."

"Okay, but see, look at yourself." He turns me to face my wall mirror. "You're starting to smile. So what's your answer going to be?"

To humor him I reply, "I would like to watch it on my couch, with a blanket and my candy. I would like it with some coco. I would like it with my Jacob." I would like it with my Jacob.

"Ok, that's enough but thank you for your participation. I will go fix you some if you can so kindly get comfortable.

"Jake, when I said my couch, I meant the one at the cottage that I live in with mom and dad. I'm guessing everyone is going to be coming back home soon and I don't want to be here when they get back."

"Fair enough, you go over there and get the coco started while I go get the movie, and any other one that gets my attention. Pick the side that you want to be on. I shall arrive in no time at all." Then he turns and walks away like a butler on a mission. I guess maybe the evening will not be so bad after all. I am going to be spending the rest of it with my Jacob.

In record time Jake was in my room with two cups of coco in his hands chanting, "Movie, movie, movie!" I fell asleep with my legs tangled in my Jacob's as usual.

%%%

Moring

I'm lying on the couch downstairs in Jacob's lap. He's sitting up stroking his finger on the top of my head. Mom and dad are sitting behind us watching me. They're upset that I am upset. The movie night was great but I couldn't stop the dream I had. I was alone. I told Jacob about it when I woke up but he did his best to reassure me that I would never be alone.

"Jacob?" I turn my face up to look at him.

"Yeah Ness?"

"Do you think I will end up with Nahuel?" Sadness is in my voice.

"Why do you ask?" curiosity plasters across his face and he looks as if he doesn't approve.

"Because I'm realizing that I can't be with a human Jacob." I sigh. "It's sad knowing that, but there is also no guarantee that I will end up with a vampire." I'm starting to feel my eyes getting watery again.

"I know." He replies as if he really does know. But how does he really know?

"Jacob, why is it that you don't date? Are you waiting for your imprint?"

"Yes, you can say that." I'm so not gonna like her.

"How do you know that it hurts this bad? Have you ever loved someone?"

"Yup, but she hasn't notice me yet in that way and at one point I felt as if I was fighting a losing battle." I feel something change just for a moment. I guess he had a bit of hesitation on how to phase his words. "I remember another time when I was fighting a losing battle but sticking around long enough just as a good friend…" He says light heartedly and then goes back to a serious tone. "Something good happens. That time I was stupid though."

"Very," my parents say in unison.

I'm guessing that he is referring to mom. He did kiss her twice to prove a point. That could have been the point.

"Mom?"

"No I'm talking about another girl that is very important to me. Someone else who I love even more than the first girl. That love hurts more than three broken ribs being re-broken." For the moment I saw his pain. I guess he does know. "She'll notice me one day."

"How did you cope when she chose the other guy?" I was genuinely curious. I wanted know. She must have been one hell of a girl.

"Have you ever had a broken rib?"

"No and you know that." Such a stupid question at a time like this.

"Well, at the time more than three ribs were being re-broken by Dr. C."

"When did you break three ribs?" Is that what was wrong with him? But grandpa could solve that.

"Before you were born Renesme." Dad chimes in to break my thoughts.

"Why did you assume that you would end up with Nahuel?" asks Jake. He looks like he doesn't approve of the idea of us.

"Because technically I'm the only girl that is not related to him and he is a half vampire."

"Well I never saw you with him either." Such a bold statement.

"Well who do you see me with?"

"I see you with someone who is…able to highlight you."

"Ok, you clearly don't know. But I do."

"Ok, what are you looking for?" he seems entertained. "I think it would be great if I could find a guy just like you. Truthfully, I think you're a perfect guy, and someone a little like daddy. Zorion would have been great if… well… you know."

"Humph, Renesme, I must say that you are very smart and very aware of what you are looking for but completely oblivious when you are aware of the obvious."

"Really? Well I know what I want. I just have wait."

He rolls his eyes. "You have proven me right. Oh and fyi, you're never going to find another Jacob Black."

"I know, you're a one in a million. You're my Jacob."

"Next time you say it, you should listen to yourself." Listen to myself. Did he… did he just…

"Don't call me Renesme. What have I told you about that?"

"There was emotion behind it. Calm down."

"Don't care, you still can't say my name."

"Yes ma'am…Can I ask you a quick question?"

"You just did, but you may ask your indented question."

"Smart ass."

"Jacob." Both my parents reprimand him.

"Why did you kiss me that night when I got home?"

Was not expecting that question or else I would have said no. I can't tell him that I just did it because it felt like a natural reaction. I've actually dreamed of that kiss right after I fell asleep. I could tell him that I thought it was a dream. No, well yes. Because I wanted to welcome you home. That might work. Why did I kiss him? Instinct seems more logical.

"Never mind, you're taking too long to answer."

"What I can't kiss my Jacob or something. How about why don't you kiss me all the time like before."

"Heart wouldn't have been in it. No point in going through the motion when it seems meaningless."

"Kissing me is meaningless."

"No Nessie, and I'm sure you can figure out why. Starts with a Z and ends with a N. It just didn't seem right for me to do but if it helps. I kissed your forehead good night last night when I put you to bed after the movie. All emotion included."

"You win."

"Only because I proved my point, but to make you happy you get another one." He leaned down and kissed me on my forehead. I turned my head and placed my finger on my cheek. Kiss. Then I placed my finger on the other side. Kiss. I placed my finger on my nose. Eskimo kiss. I couldn't help the giggle that escaped me. I placed my finger on my lips.

"Not a chance Nuttah.

Jpov

(What did jake and Zorion disscuss on the way back to z home.)

KNOCK! KNOCK! Who would be rattling their knuckles at my door? I thought everyone was out. Just as I get my lazy butt off the sofa, my phone vibrates. I need a ride- Zorion.

I open the door to Zorion's goofy face.

"What did you do?"

"Why did I have to do something? Look, I need a ride home. Renesme and I are no longer together."

"Sooooooo, ok. Let me grab my keys."

My car has never been this silent when there is more than one person in the car. Maybe I should say something. About time though.

"You don't like me." and the silence is broken.

"I wouldn't say that." I just didn't like you because you were dating my girl. Simple.

"You imprinted on Renesme, thus I've concluded that you hate me."

"I never hated you, I disapproved of you yes, but only because you were dating my girl."

"She's a good one. You're lucky to have her." Ahhhh, now he sounds sad, not really my problem though.

"I know. Now answer me this. How did you know?"

"I kind of figured it out when she started acting weird when you left." Smart kid.

"Seth or Zuri didn't tell you?"

"Zuri… I made her tell me to confirm. She and Seth looked like they were keeping a secret about your absence. Not to mention when Seth took Zuri to la push she got to meet all the other imprintees and Clair was one of them."

"Clair is getting big, she'll be turning nine soon."

"Yeah well, Zuri had Seth explain that one and then she asked about you and Renesme. Plus, the bracelet that Zuri has is the same as Renesme's."

"I know, Seth already told me without really telling me. Wolf thing. But I had nothing to do with your break up. But I am happy about it. It makes me relieved."

"Why she doesn't know about it, shouldn't you tell her."

"I can't. I made a deal with Edward, Carlisle and Bella about letting her choose her mate. The person she wants to be with for the rest of her life should not be forced upon her."

"You should tell her any ways or at least give her hints."

"I've been giving her hints since I gave her the bracelet and Jasper told me to tell her as well." I'm starting to hate following the rules. It's nothing but torture.

"Yeah that's another thing. She wore that bracelet everyday that you were gone and hasn't taken it off since. So when you came back, I knew my days were number. But I don't want to live forever either so…yeah. Can you."

"I can live as long as I want. Just as long as I keep phasing, I won't age."

"That makes you even more perfect for her. I think that the moment it clicks in her head, you both will be happy and maybe by that time I can be her friend again."

"I like you as her friend and nothing else more."

Actually, I think those hints may be clicking in her head soon. Some of the recent conversations that we have had in relation to you, she sounds like she's in love but scared. You really hurt her when you left and she's afraid that you'll leave her again."

"I keep telling her there's no reason for that method of thinking."

"Yeah but she thinks that you're going to imprint, if you haven't already."

"I know, she's brought it up. I am considering telling her thought. But since you two just broke up, I'm going to wait at least six months."

"Six months?"

"I will not be the rebound."

"Makes since. I'm just going to say this last thing thou, don't let her drive herself crazy over trying to figure out your imprinting situation."

"Thanks and I really don't want her to, that's why I give her the hints. Humph, my way of cheating."

"I wouldn't call it cheating, I would call it. Clever."

I dropped him off. Now considering these recent events, I should do something to put a smile on her face. Maybe I should get her her favorite candy, sweets for my Nuttah, and a movie.

You know what this means, time for Jacob and Nessie, and I like the idea of Nessie figuring it out but not figuring out that it is here. I just had to quickly get the break up chapter out of the way. So that's what I'm working on now. Finals are officially done so I am completely dedicated. Thanks again VanacaRobert.