Lucien froze. He resumed the cold blooded behaviour that was typical to him during the Mann Co. days.
"I don't know."
"Do you want to... uh... Prepare something for his arrival? And I thought that it might be better if I disappeared for the time bein'..."
Lucien quickly raised his head to look Mundy in the eye.
"What?"
"Well, he doesn't know for us... And he doesn't know you could be with... well... with a bloke... and add to that the fact I'm the Snoipah from the Mann Co. days..."
Lucien sighed and frowned.
Merde, Mundy is right... How am I going to manage that?
He put the fingers of his right hand on his eyes and rubbed them.
"And he's coming in a couple days now..."
Lucien growled.
"I mean, we've gotta think of somethin'..."
Questions were spiraling in Lucien's mind.
"Enough!"
Lucien shouted all of a sudden. Mundy opened wide eyes.
"I-"
Lucien interrupted him, his eyes flashing angrily.
"I don't know, alright?"
He thumped the table with his closed fist.
"I HAVE NO IDEA!"
In a fraction of a second Mundy saw what Lucien's father must have been like and it scared him as much as he hated it. He knew his lover could be the most romantic and soft spoken person, but he could also transform into an unstoppable tornado of rage.
Lucien stood up, his fork still in his left hand and his knife still in his right hand. He started pacing the room, his eyes locked on the carpet on the floor. Mundy stopped eating and followed Lucien's walking left and right with his eyes, like a tennis match.
"Should I go to the aiport for him? Is that too much? Should I then take him directly to the flat? Should I take him first to a café? But at some point he will have to come here? And then what? Introduce you to him?"
He raised his head suddenly and stopped walking for a second, facing the wall in front of him.
"But he knows you already! What am I going to do then with you?"
He resumed his walking.
"Hide you away while he's here? No! Of course not! I am not hiding you! That doesn't make any sense! I don't want to lie or hide anything anymore! And the whole point of him coming is that I am stopping these lies and hidden truths, so no! You will have to stay here! Then that means that he will have to face the truth. I am now with a man."
He stopped walking again, this time, in the middle of the room.
"What if he then decides that he doesn't want me in his life after that? What if he thinks that I'm... I'm..."
He opened wide eyes. He couldn't find the words in English, and even in French, his mind raced but to no avail. He clenched his fists.
"Lu'..."
Mundy's voice broke his train of thought. He now was thinking that he was pathetic, a good-for-nothing. He did even worse than his own father. He got that lady pregnant and left, she raised his son alone and now that they were going to properly meet, he would find him in a man's arms. In a man's arms. He disgusted himself. He dropped the fork. The metal cling as it hit the floor got muffled by the carpet.
"MERDE!"
He shouted as he let the knife fall from his left to his right hand and threw it towards the wall, in Mundy's direction but about a dozen centimetres away from his head. Mundy's reflexes kicked in and in the blink of an eye, he raised his arm and stopped the blade, mid air, as it flew past his ear.
Lucien's jaw dropped. He realised what he had just done. He got 12 cm away from throwing a knife at his dearest and beloved because of his incompetence as a decent man and father. He dropped to his knees on the floor. Mundy put the knife on the table and jumped to help his lover.
"I am such a failure."
Mundy crouched and sat next to his lover, putting his hands on his shoulder as if to mend his pieces back together.
"No you're not, Lu'..."
"I am!"
He powerfully punched the carpet on the ground next to him. The noise of his wrath got muffled by the carpet but the wave created by it made the carpet fibres bend, creating a wave similar to that of a pebble falling in a calm lake.
"I got her pregnant and left and now he is going to find me here, with a man... He is going to see me loving a man. He will be furious, and rightly so! That support and love I should have given to his mother I am now giving to another person and not anyone... A man! And of course, that very man used to be a colleague that we both worked with before!"
"Stop saying nonsense-"
"I am worse than my father..."
Mundy opened wide eyes. But this time, he was decided to make the tables turn. He would help his lover through the storm.
"No you're not! And in any case, stop comparing yourself to him!"
Lucien wiped the silent tears of rage that had started to stream on his face with his sleeve and looked at Mundy.
"Not everything has to be done to be like or unlike him! You are your own man, bloody hell!"
He went silent for a second, just enough for his words to resonate in Lucien's skull.
"Lucien, you had to leave his mum, she didn't leave you any choice. You were going to leave your job and you past life for her. But you did a mistake and that's fine, we all do mistakes and it's waaay behind you now! The boy got raised as best he could by her and you know she did an amazin' job because you saw him in Mann Co., fighting men twice his size and age! He was a good teammate like any one of us, he was doing his best to beat the BLU team, like you or me..."
Lucien looked at him with his sad grey eyes.
"He is a good young boy and he is that good that he actually is givin' you a chance as a father. Now, stop panicking. I'm here with you, we're going to do this and you'll be fine."
Mundy took Lucien's chin between his fingers.
"We will be fine. I promise."
Lucien smiled but it was one of those smiles where even if the lips pursed, he could read a cry of help in Lucien's eyes.
"Come with me."
Mundy stood up and helped Lucien up. He took him by the shoulders and guided him to the bedroom.
"You lay in the bed and give me one minute, I'll be right back."
Lucien obeyed. Meanwhile Mundy went to the kitchen. He started the kettle and prepared two mugs. Each had a herbal tea bag. Mundy's mother used to drink lots of it and he happened to keep the habit. She would always say that there was no sadness that a cup of herbal tea and a good discussion couldn't cure. He poured the hot water in the cups and added one sugar and a spoon for Lucien's cup. He took the tray and headed for the bedroom. He found Lucien sat on the bed with his arms wrapped around his knees, his eyes locked in front of him, on the wall. He put the tray on the bed and hopped on the bed carefully.
"There, take this."
Lucien took the mug Mundy was handing him. He stirred the sugar with the spoon for a few seconds and was about to drink when Mundy prevented him.
"Wait, it's too hot. Put it back on the tray if it's too hot for you to hold."
Lucien did as told.
"Now, put your knees down... Roight, like that yeah... Now look at me..."
Lucien's eyes were locked on his legs. They seemed too long. He felt he was too big in the room. He wished he was but a mouse... Mundy put his hand on Lucien's thigh and started stroking it.
"Mon amour... s'il te plaît..."
[My love... please...]
Hearing Mundy speaking in French made him turn and look him in the eye.
"Je t'aime et je veux tout faire pour t'aider."
[I love you and I will do anything to help you.]
It seemed to Lucien that beyond the words, Mundy's accent was giving him an irresistible charm and his speech was almost a song given the music of his accent. It soothed him. Each word he said was like pouring cold water on a scorching hot blade. It would turn into steam quickly and diffuse in the air slowly but the blade would cool down under each drop.
"On est dans cette situation tous les deux, toi et moi. Tu n'es pas seul... non, tu n'es plus seul. Je suis avec toi et ensemble, on va y arriver."
[We are in this together, you and me. You are not alone... no, you are not alone anymore. I am with you and together, we will make it.]
Lucien was feeling something utterly new. He felt like even though Jérémy was his son and in that regard, he was his responsibility, he could unload some of the pressure to someone else. He had never felt that before. He used to always carry the weight of his issues on his shoulders, never sharing them with anyone. So he had never thought that anyone could actually carry part of his problems with him. For the first time in his life, it happened. And he felt the fear and anguish that was tiing his stomach into knots was going away.
Mundy put his fingers on Lucien's cup and feeling that it was less hot, he gave it back to him. Lucien drank some of it. He felt the beverage clear his mind like a wave of the sea erasing footprints in the sand.
"Ne t'inquiète pas, on va y arriver."
[Don't worry, we will make it.]
Lucien finished drinking the herbal tea and put the cup back on the tray. Mundy had continued taking sips between sentences and he finished drinking as well. He put his cup back on the tray and put the tray on the floor, next to the bed. He pushed Lucien to lie on the bed. He then put his right hand on Lucien's chest and grabbed his right hand with his left one. He held it on his lips and kissed it. Feeling the comfort and softness from Mundy made Lucien find his tongue again.
"Merci mon amour et pardon, je me suis comporté comme un idiot."
[Thanks my love and sorry, I behaved like an idiot.]
"It doesn't matter. What matters is that you're confident in yourself and in me. I promise that I will do anything possible for you to be happy."
He kissed Lucien's fingers again and felt his hand opening to carress his cheek. He bent his head on the side.
"Merci, mon amour."
"You're very welcome."
Lucien pulled on Mundy's cheek. The latter bent down until their faces were a few inches apart. Lucien looked straight at Mundy's eyes.
"You saved me from myself... again..."
Mundy smiled.
"And I'll gladly do it again."
He dived and kissed Lucien's lips. He quickly brushed his lips and withdrew. He sat up, next to Lucien.
"To come back to your worries, I'd say you pay a taxi to get Jeremy to a café. But tell the taxi to take the luggage here, I'll take it. You spend a bit of time with him at the café, maybe you could go on a walk or somethin'. Oh I know! Go to a park. Sit there with him on a bench and talk. Tell him about yourself but most of all listen to what he wants to tell you. And please, please, whatever he says, don't get angry. When you feel like you start being angry, don't think about your father. Think about me. Think about those kids Maman France is raising. They look up to you and I, well, I love you, quite simply and I don't want you to be angry."
Lucien was listening carefully. Mundy paused for a second.
"And at some point, when you feel like it's the right moment, tell him about us. But not too bluntly! I mean..."
Mundy scratched the back of his head.
"I don't know how I'm goin' to explain this... As a spook, you're used to keeping secrets, roight?"
Lucien nodded.
"Well, do the opposite now. Empty your heart. But it's like... It's like..."
Mundy's thoughts raced.
"Sappers!"
"Sappers?"
"Yeah, the stock one would make the sentry break in a couple seconds, roight?"
Lucien nodded.
"Well you don't want to be like that. You want to be the red tape recorder. You want to disable the sentry slowly, downgrading it level by level. You get me?"
Lucien found it adorable that Mundy was trying to explain himself with a jargon he was not totally familiar with. He nodded and smiled. Mundy smiled in return.
"I will do as you say. Merci mon ange." [my angel]
Lucien smiled.
"I owe you some amazingly good advice now, Mundy."
Mundy smiled. He looked left and right, as if he was looking for something.
"What's the matter, mon amour?"
Mundy looked displeased.
"Well... That hot herbal tea got me really hot..."
"And?"
"Well... It's not like I can remove any layer of clothes!"
Mundy had been in his boxer shorts since he exited the shower. Lucien saw an opportunity there and smirked.
"Well, you technically still can..."
His eyebrows jumped up and down. Seeing Lucien play the smug irresistible Frenchman again soothed Mundy's heart. The storm had been successfully mastered.
"Yeah but it's not goin' to change much, roight?"
Lucien raised his eyebrows and still looking as smug as the devil, he answered.
"Speak for yourself..."
Mundy sighed, smiling.
"... Oh I nearly forgot, mon chaton."
Lucien sat up. He pushed Mundy to lie on the bed.
"I did promise that I would show you some feline play, didn't I?"
Mundy smiled in anticipation.
"Yeah, you did."
"In that case..."
Lucien quickly hopped off the bed and switched the lamp on the nightstand on. He then went to the main light and switched it off. He headed for the window and opened it but closed the louvered shutters. He came back on the bed.
"Is that it?" Asked Mundy, just to provoke Lucien. And it didn't miss.
"Of course not, mon chaton. But for the rest, we have to make sure you're no longer a baby cat..."
"Uh?"
"Well, it wouldn't be appropriate to do such things with an infant..."
Mundy smiled.
"Mate, I'm nearly as old as you."
"In that case, be prepared..."
Mundy raised an eyebrow like a question mark. Lucien whispered.
"...because I will make you so hot you will have to remove that last layer of yours..."
Lucien climbed on top of Mundy and kissed him. He felt Mundy's hands on his cheeks travelling down to his neck and shoulders. He pushed the kimono behind. It flowed down along Lucien's arms and without breaking the kiss, he got rid of it. Mundy's fingers slipped under the tanktop again. They both breathed louder. Lucien was now sure that one thing Mundy couldn't resist, was his tongue. So he slowly added it to the play. Mundy moaned intensely. Lucien smiled. He made Mundy fall with agility and mastery. The Australian hand tightened his grip on Lucien at first but now he had completely loosened it. He couldn't control anything anymore. Lucien broke the kiss and remove his tanktop quickly. His lips came back in Mundy's neck nibbling softly all the way to his collarbone. Mundy couldn't feel anything anymore but the light buzzes where Lucien's lips or tongue were.
Suddenly, as Lucien was travelling more and more down, he felt it. He knew that now, he could take that last layer off Mundy. He knew that it was what Mundy craved. So he did. He put his hands on each side of Mundy's pelvis, on the fabric of the boxer shorts and pulled down gently. There was no doubt. Mundy was loving it. Lucien threw the last layer of clothes away and, slightly pushing Mundy's legs apart, got busy to make Mundy lose his mind, which he successfully did, as the long moan confirmed. Mundy put his right hand in Lucien's hair and grasped it firmly. It was no longer light buzzes. The pulses of pleasure grew more and more intense. Mundy could neither feel nor control his legs anymore. The only thing he could do is sink deeper and deeper in pleasure under Lucien's power. And so he could not resist the free fall anymore and yielded to it. Without a parachute or any safety net at the bottom, he fell into that bottomless pit that Lucien was dragging him into. But with growing intensity, he found it harder and harder to breathe. He felt his heart beat in his chest and the rush of blood to the head made his temples beat in rythm as well. He grasped the bedsheet with his left hand, digging with his very nails. The fall was about to end. He could feel it.
"Lucien..."
Mundy half whispered. Lucien raised his eyes and smiled devilishly. Mundy looked down and saw his eyes shine fiercely. He removed his hand from Lucien's head and grasped the bedsheet to his right and left while closing his eyes and frowning. The pulses of pleasure were growing more and more intense. The free fall would end very soon, he could see the ground, clearer and clearer, growing bigger and bigger as he was approaching.
"Lu-"
BOOM.
He hit the ground, at full speed. He felt all his muscles contract at the same time as he tightened his clench to the bedsheets. His whole body jerked up as he moaned loudly, gritting his teeth. All the tension Lucien had built up during the long fall was gone in an instant.
He breathed loudly, still dizzy and unable to open his eyes. He put a hand on his chest, to try and calm down. Lucien sat up and smiled. He was proud, terribly so. He lied down, next to his lover, resting his head on his shoulder and put his hand on top of Mundy's, on his chest. He felt Mundy's heart racing and his ribcage going up and down quickly. It took him a few minutes to calm down.
"Wow... Thank you, Lu'..."
"Non, mon amour, thank you."
Mundy opened his eyes slowly. The faint light of the lamp was too bright for him. It took him a couple seconds and some blinking for his pupils to retract back to their normal size.
"You're amazin', luv'."
"If I'm amazing, then there are truly no words to describe you, may it be in English or French..."
He took a deep breath.
"... As always, Maman France was right."
Mundy raised an eyebrow.
-- Author's notes --
Oof! That was a hot one eh?
Let me know what you thought please! I hope I didn't go too far with this one.
And stay tuned for Chapter 22 :) !