A/n: Thank you for 90 reviews! I owe it all to salazar's heir19, cupcakemania22, KookiesandKream, EgyLynx so thanks!

~Narrator's POV~

Rilian ran far, far away from the council room and rushed straight back to his quarters. The servants in the corridors made way for their Prince and of course bowed to him but he raced past them, his pace only rivaled by the intense beating of his heart. He fumbled with the keys to his chambers and stumbled in, rushing to the bathroom and furiously turning the tap on, leaving the water cascading down the tap and into the sink, swirling in a spherical field, the flow and the rush of the tap water resembling a cataract. He was breathing heavily, a hundred thoughts running through his mind. It even felt a little apocalyptic to him, honestly. He splashed the ice cold water on his face and tried to still his racing thoughts, but he wasn't much successful. So he resorted to roughly pulling his tunic and shirt off.

~Rilian's POV~

That's it. This would be the end of me. Mom and Dad would be gone for a couple months to the Lone Islands, and now I was left to my own devices. I was all on my own to deal with all the troubles of life. It's not like I was bad at politics – I was actually pretty good, to be honest. I just didn't want to deal with councilors – I knew they didn't like me. They never did, and they probably never would. I was not surprised. They'd say they knew better than I did, so of course I ought to listen to them. And it wasn't like I wouldn't listen to them. It's just that they're so prejudiced towards Levin and against me. Honestly, what had I ever done to them that made them hate me? Because of my autism when I was younger? I'd have to admit that there was no way I could possibly completely, fully grow out of this condition, but why would they never get that I never asked for this to happen? I wanted to be exactly like Levin too. I wanted to be outgoing, smart, popular with everybody, agreeable, and possess all the positive qualities that Levin happened to be blessed with. But I couldn't be just like him, as much as I had wanted to, because I didn't know what's going on in my biological system, but I just never wanted to associate myself with people outside my family.

Laurel's family was an exception, because of some reason that I couldn't even quite figure out, but it just so happened that I found it alright to confide in her. Nobody could ever take her place in my heart. We were closer than our parents thought we were.

But of course I didn't deserve her. She deserved a strong, reliable man who could lift up the sky for her when it's falling down, but all our lives, it's always been her shielding me from other people's snide comments, and she prevented them from getting to my head.

Of course, as I grew up, I was less anti-social, but I still felt uneasy when politicians wanted to talk to me. I always felt as if they're trying to destroy me by putting me down and making me feel useless, and there were many times when they were quite close to succeeding in their attempts, but there was always Laurel, who could haul me up before I had hit the rock bottom of the dark pit I'd fallen into. I had never expected her to do anything for me at all, but she tried to protect me as much as my family did for me. So I pretty much had trust issues, and I was pretty insecure.

As a Prince and as a man I shouldn't be hiding in my own quarters when I was appointed second in command to the Regent. But I suppose, to a certain extent, it would be better to be a second in command than to be a Regent, because then I wouldn't have to directly deal with the councilors, and hear other cases in court, and I could leave Levin to that, because I knew he's much more sensible than I was. Fern said I was too hot-headed, and she could be right. I could just handle paperwork, and other administrative processes, privately, in my own office. I felt quite comfortable with that.

The tentative knocks on my door, and the softer, shifting footsteps drew me away from my thoughts. I quickly remembered that when I had rushed in, I had forgotten to shut my door out of a hurry, so now, I had to talk. Great.

~Narrator's POV~

"Laurel?" Rilian stepped out of the bathroom, looking rather troubled. But immediately, he felt a little embarrassed, seeing as he was shirtless, and was in the same room as a lady.

"Rilian." Laurel said softly, her eyes slightly widened and her jaw slightly agape at the sight of her best friend who was shirtless. "Oh, uh," she took a step back, "should I…maybe come back later? I'm sorry. It was an untimely interruption." As much as she had tried to back away, she couldn't quite prevent herself from staring at his slightly muscular and firm chest, his strong torso, his toned body, his tanned skin. There was a tingling urge in her to run her fingers over his torso.

"No," Rilian said sharply, causing Laurel to snap to attention. "No, no, please," he said in a much softer tone this time. "Stay." He gulped.

Laurel nodded. "Alright." She bit her lip. "I got here as soon as I could. Fern told me what just happened –"

"Don't leave." Rilian abruptly outstretched his hand to gently grip Laurel's forearm. "Please. Don't go to the Lone Islands with your parents. I need you. Here in Narnia. With me." He croaked, pleading, his voice breaking a little.

Laurel stared back at her best friend, a little astounded. "I'm not going anywhere, Rilian." She spoke gently. "That's what I came here to tell you about. I'm staying. Only my parents are going on the trip."

Rilian slowly let go of Laurel. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to…um, frighten you."

"That's alright." Laurel smiled weakly. "I came to see how you were. The servants saw you rush by and said you were sweating and looked really anxious."

"Really?" Rilian murmured to himself.

"You aren't…unwell, are you?" Laurel inquired, concerned.

"No…" Rilian murmured dully. "I just…needed to clear my mind. There's too much going on at the moment. I don't want to sound like I can't handle an emergency, but I just don't know anymore."

Laurel responded by holding her best friend by the hand. From the bathroom, she grabbed a small towel and wiped the beads of sweat and water droplets off his forehead, cheeks, and chin. The gesture surprised Rilian, in a pleasant way. She was so caring. What would he do without her?

She placed the towel into a laundry basket and smiled supportively at him. "You worry too much."

"One of the very few times when Fern is right." Rilian confessed. "Maybe it does take years off my life. I wish I could be carefree, like Levin."

"Why do you constantly want to be like your brother?" Laurel had to query.

Rilian shrugged. "I don't know. It appears everyone wants me to be more like him so that I'll be more likeable. They don't like me for who I am."

"Isn't it better to be hated for who you are, than to be loved for who you're not?" Laurel posed a question for Rilian to ponder upon. "I don't want an exact replica of your brother. You are you, and that's that."

"Who am I?" Rilian questioned. "I've lost myself, Laurel."

Laurel grasped his hand. "No you haven't. You've just been hiding from you are for too long. You doubt your value. Don't run from who you are."

"I don't want to be myself." Rilian shook his head sadly.

"But I want you to be yourself." Laurel replied. "You're not gonna believe me when I tell you this, but I'm gonna say it anyway because it's the truth and I'm not going to keep it inside anymore: you're perfect. Very, very perfect."

Rilian sighed. "I'm gonna say this as well: you're silly. Very, very silly."

"I'm just as silly as you are perfect. Deal?" Laurel offered.

Rilian couldn't help but break into a slight smile. "Deal."

Dear diary,

My heart is aching. Mostly for the woman I love. It's simply been too long since I last talked to her, or saw her face, and each day I would wait patiently in the stables for her to visit me, but at the end of my shift I would just be disappointed. Perhaps I shouldn't get my hopes up, if I don't want to have to watch them fall every time. Another color fades to grey. After all, she is a Princess, and Princesses should have something better to do than to spend time with a hostler. I was just expecting too much from her.

I still don't know what she's done to my heart. I've fallen for her, but nobody's going to catch me. I've always been lonely. I'm probably gonna stay this way for the rest of my life. Would I be regarded as weak for falling so easily? I don't suppose I could be blamed. It felt too right. And everything just feels wrong without her here. It's like a part of me is missing. The desperation is one-sided. She doesn't feel the same. This is wasted love.

Absence really does make the heart grow fonder, I suppose, and I miss her a lot, honestly. I never thought I'd be able to miss someone that much, but now, all I've learned has overturned, and I'm guessing that while my heart is calling out to her, she must be thinking of her courter from Archenland. Right. I mustn't forget that she is taken, after all, and it probably wasn't proper of me to have any romantic feelings towards her at all. Who am I to say I am in love with her? The Prince has known her all their lives, and if life were a book, I'd just be a paragraph in hers, while he'd be filling up every page and chapter. This is unfair, but what can I do about it? I have had as much say in my social standing as they have. And if they are lucky enough to be royalty then there's nothing I can do about it. This is most depressing, but we humans are so powerless against the bearing fate has on us. Luck just isn't on my side, and I know that sooner or later I will have to come to terms with the fact that I won't get to see her that often, or see her at all.

Signed,

Enrique

A/n:

I just felt I had to bring back some Enrique feels. I've been told the majority of my readers are shipping Fern/Olvin and as much as I love them together, you're supposed to struggle between the two pairings and the struggle isn't intense enough, so here we go.

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