Warning- If you are not a bi-bro fan, turn back now. This story is not for you. This one has a happy ending with the brotherly bond firmly back in place. Neither brother is going to walk out on the other and refuse to forgive him. Both brothers have done things they shouldn't have. (even though they did them for what they thought were the right reasons.) Neither one is all innocent or all guilty. And neither one is solely responsible for starting the Apocalypse. It took the breaking of 66 seals to do that.(not one) Of those, Sam broke one and Dean broke one. And before my inbox gets inundated with PM's telling me Dean didn't know he was breaking a seal, I know he didn't. But neither did Sam. Dean, Sam, and Bobby all thought killing Lilith would stop the Apocalypse not be the last seal to break.

One last remark- Any flames will be given all the consideration they deserve, i.e. they will be immediately trashed.

Previously on Supernatural- Carding a hand through Sam's sweat soaked hair, Dean settled in to do what he did best; take care of Sammy.

SPN

Sam slowly woke and lazily opened his eyes a little. Glancing around the familiar room, he smiled as his gaze landed on his sleeping sibling. Having Dean nearby made him feel safe; always had. Assured that his big brother hadn't left him, Sam started a mental check of his body. His head was pounding, his throat was sore, and all his joints ached something fierce. All in all he felt like complete and utter crap. Sleep beckoned him and he longed to answer its call but he couldn't; not with his full to bursting bladder screaming at him to get to a bathroom before his bed became a lake. Sighing, Sam looked to his brother once more. He hated to wake Dean up when he looked so exhausted but he didn't have any…

"Hey Sammy! Good to see you awake!" Josh cheerfully whispered as he crept over to the bed. "How are you feeling kid?"

"Not too good" Sam rasped, gazing up at the man. "Josh, could you, ummm, could you helpmetothebathroom?"

Josh grinned at the boy's embarrassment. 'The kid would croak if he knew what we'd done for him the last few days.' He thought. To Sam though he merely said, "I can do you one better, Sport." He leaned over and snatched a heavy metal pan off the floor. "I'll put this bed pan in place for ya so you don't have to get up. With all that dancing you're doing I don't think you'd make it to the bathroom."

Sam turned beet red as the man he thought of as an uncle tossed the covers to one side, yanked down his boxer shorts, and helped him lift his behind off the bed before sliding the bed pan into place. Much to Sam's dismay, Joshua stayed right there while he did his business. He didn't even turn around to give Sam a little privacy!

Once the littlest Winchester was finished, Josh carefully slid the pan out. Setting it on the floor, he quickly replaced the boy's shorts and blankets. He then picked the pan back up and looked down at Sam, smiling as the boy's eyes began to droop. "I'm gonna go empty this." He softly said as he gestured to the hallway. "Why don't you get some more sleep, kiddo?"

"Th'ks Jo…" Sam's eyes drifted shut and he fell asleep.

"Sweet dreams, kid" Josh whispered, tenderly palming the boy's cheek. He adjusted the covers on both sleeping Winchesters before silently walking out of the room.

SPN

The next time Sam managed to peel his eyes open he found himself face to face with his brother. "D'n sp'ce!" he sleepily grumbled.

Chuckling, Dean sat back a little. "Sorry Princess" he apologized though his tone suggested he wasn't sorry at all. "I was just wondering if I was gonna have to kiss you to wake you up or something."

Sam grimaced. "Gross *yawn* dude" he replied, glaring at his laughing sibling. The glare didn't last long though. It was swiftly replaced by a frown as the young man noticed the bags under his brother's eyes, the disheveled hair and clothes, and the way his smile didn't quite make it to his eyes as well as the furrowed brow and body odor. All were signs of an extremely worried, mother henning Dean. Which made perfect sense. Of course Dean would be in super overprotective big brother mode; he thought he was dealing with a sick little Sammy. He had always been that way when a younger Sam was ill or hurt. But this was different. Dean didn't just look tired; he looked beyond exhausted, like the slightest breeze would bowl him over. And the worry lines on his forehead were more pronounced than usual. The truth suddenly hit Sam like a ton of bricks! He had done this! Between dealing with his injuries, sudden illness, and his supposed regression Dean was running himself ragged! This wasn't what Sam had wanted! He'd thought by pretending to be little Sammy he'd make Dean happy; that his big brother wouldn't be so worried or upset all the time. But his act had done the exact opposite. He'd just added to the load Dean already carried. He had to make this right. He had to. So Sam took a deep breath, screwed up his courage, and opened his mouth. "Dean, I've gotta tell you something really important."

"Okay" Dean agreed. "Shoot"

"I, uhhh, I've, I've been pre-pretending to be little Sammy all this time. I never, never regressed or anything. I was just pretending." Sam tearfully admitted. Dropping his gaze to his hands, he waited for Dean's wrath.

"I know." Dean replied.

Sam's eyes shot back up to his brother's face. "You, you know?" he asked.

Dean nodded. "You always tell all your deepest secrets when you're out of it, dude." He informed his little brother, giving him a small smile. The smile quickly morphed into an angry thin line. "What I want to know is why. Why did you do that? Why did you lie to me again?"

Sam managed a slight shrug. "I, I don't know. I, I heard you say you were gonna leave and I didn't want you to go so I, I…" he paused. "I was just being a selfish SOB like dad…"

"Stop!" Dean commanded. "I want you to listen and listen good. You are not now and never have been selfish. Dad was wrong! You weren't any more selfish than we were."

Sam frowned. "You and dad weren't selfish." He corrected.

"Really?" Dean scoffed, crossing his arms. "So dad dragging two little kids here, there, and yonder and dumping them in one motel room after another so he could go out and fight everything that went bump in the night wasn't selfish? Or how about going out and getting shit faced every November second? Or never celebrating any holidays because of what they reminded him of? Or how about never allowing us to talk or ask questions about mom? Aren't those selfish?"

"But"

"And then there's me." Dean continued. "How many times did I dump you at that Pennywise place so I could hit the town even though I knew you hated the places because of the clowns? Or what about all the times I sided with dad because I wanted to hunt, huh? Wouldn't you say I was being selfish?"

"No Dean" Sam replied, shaking his head. "You weren't being selfish. You were just being a normal, teenage boy."

"And so were you." Dean tossed back. "You weren't being selfish when you wanted normal things like being on a soccer team or a school club or even finishing a whole year at one school. You were just being a kid. All kids want what they can't have. You were no exception. Dad and I should have known that. We never should have called you selfish. You were no more selfish than we were."

Sam shook his head again. "No, no I'm the selfish one. Not you. Never you." he protested. "I always wanted my way! And, and I left! I ran away when things didn't go my way!"

Dean sighed. This was not going the way he had planned. Still he was learning just how badly their dad's and sometimes his words had hurt his brother. "Okay enough!" he growled. "You were not selfish! And you know it! One, if you ran off every time things didn't go your way, dad and I would have spent every day looking for your scrawny ass! And two, when you did run off to Flagstaff, it had nothing to do with you not getting your way!"

"Doesn't matter" Sam croaked, refusing to back down. "You got in trouble because of me."

"No, I got in trouble because of me." Dean corrected. Seeing confusion flash across his brother's face, the hunter clarified his statement. "Dad was pissed that you'd run off on my watch. I'll give you that. But he was furious that I had waited a week and a half to call him. Knowing what's out there, calling dad should have been my first move. But I figured you were at a friend's hiding out or at least somewhere in town. It wasn't until I'd done a thorough search of that city and the ones around it that I realized you were really gone and that I'd need help to find you."

"That was a reasonable assumption though." Sam told him. "That time I ran away when I was eight, I only went as far as my friend's backyard."

"Well, dad didn't see it that way." Dean tossed back. "I've never seen him like that. He was terrified Sammy. He was scared to death that something would happen to you before we could find you. And it wasn't just the supernatural things he was worried about man. The human predators; they're the things he feared the most. A cute little kid like you out on his own is a pedophile's dream. And thanks to me, those sickos had had over a week to stalk and maybe hurt you."

"Nobody…"

"But they could have and that's on me. If I'd just called dad when I found out you were gone, he'd have come and brought every hunter he knew with him. We would have found you in a matter of hours instead of weeks." Dean countered, shaking his head as memories of that time resurfaced. "If something had happened to you, it would have killed me. I deserved whatever punishment I got. Besides, it's not like he beat me or anything. Dad just yelled and ranted and maybe pushed me around a little. And I was grounded from hunting until he decided he could trust me again. That's all."

"You still wouldn't have been in trouble if it wasn't for me." Sam angrily stated.

"Like you never got in trouble for things I did." Dean scoffed as a smirk worked its way onto his face. "I think my favorite was that time you were on the phone with dad lying about my whereabouts when he stormed into the room?"

Sam let out a chuckle. "How was I supposed to know he'd gotten back and noticed the impala was missing?" he replied. "I think that was the worst spanking I ever got. I didn't think I'd ever be able to sit again."

"Hey, I lost the keys to the impala for a month and got triple the training out of it." Dean grumbled before smiling. "See, you're not selfish. You wouldn't have gotten your butt busted for lying for me if you were."

Sam huffed. He had to make Dean see; had to make him understand that their dad had been right all along. "What about Stanford? Dad told me I had to choose between college and family and I chose college. If that wasn't selfish, I don't know what is."

"I'm glad you brought that up, Sammy." Dean told him. "Cause I've been thinking about that an awful lot the last few days and I've come to see that you were right to go."

"That's r…wait! What?" Sam croaked. Wincing, he attempted to clear his sore throat.

Dean swiftly poured a cup of water and helped Sam slowly drink it. "Better?" he questioned.

"Y-yeah" Sam rasped.

Dean's brow furrowed. His little brother's voice had sounded wreaked before but it was steadily getting worse as time went on. They needed to finish this conversation fast so Sam could rest. Nodding to himself, the senior Winchester set the cup on the coffee table and then threw himself back into the discussion. "Okay, like I was saying I understand the Stanford thing now. You weren't trying to hurt us or get away from us. You just wanted to go to college. And yeah, you wanted to go to learn and to have normal for a while but I think it was more than that. I think a big part of wanting to go had to do with you wanting to grow up; to become the adult we never would have let you be."

"Dean"

"Don't interrupt Sasquatch" Dean scolded. "You know I never realized how differently we were raised until now. I always figured you and I were treated just the same but that isn't exactly true. I had one thing you never did; freedom. I've been free to do pretty much whatever I wanted since dad started leaving us in motel rooms when I was seven. Sure I had you to watch and food to ration and a lot of other responsibilities but I also had the freedom to choose what we did and when we did it. I was even free to come and go as I saw fit especially after you turned seven or eight. While you were stuck in the room, I was out getting food or getting supplies or just walking around. And then we got older and I got into the ladies. So I started dropping you at every Plucky's we came across with strict orders to stay put. And even though you hated the place you stayed there until I finished cruising for chicks. Then there were all the evenings I stayed out to ummm, party a little and left you to man the phone so dad wouldn't know I was out."

"True but I even-eventually got to stay by my, myself." Sam softly pointed out.

"Yeah but you still didn't have any real freedom." Dean countered. "Dad and I called the motel phone at odd hours to check on you and make sure you were in the room like you were supposed to be. Between our calls and school you had almost no time to yourself."

Sam yawned. "You guys would have cut the apron strings sooner or later." he argued.

Dean raised an eyebrow. "When? When you were forty?" he scoffed. "Dude, dad didn't even let me hunt on my own until I was in my early twenties."

"But"

"Come on man." Dean interrupted. "If you'd stayed, dad and I would have never treated you like an adult. You would have always been little Sammy who needs to be protected. It's the truth and you know it."

"Alright" Sam answered, knowing it was true whether he wanted to admit it or not.

"Good, now let's get back to the topic on hand. I've got something I want you to listen to." Dean said, pulling out Ellen's cell phone. He scrolled to the video of Sam's fevered confession and hit play.

Sam paled as he listened to his confession. He hung his head when the recording ended. "Dean, Dean I'm sorry." He apologized. "That first time I did it because I didn't want you to leave but then *yawn* then I heard you say you hoped I'd stay that way so I kept doing it for you. I'm sorry. I thought I was doing what you wanted. But I got it wrong again. *yawn* I never get it right. No matter what I do or why I always end up letting you down. And, and I know saying I'm sorry can't make up for everything I've done but I am sorry." Sam glanced up at his brother with a sigh. "I guess you're gonna leave now, huh?"

Dean frowned. "I'm not going anywhere Sam." He answered, wondering where his brother came up with that idea.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, it makes sense that I'm the one that leaves." He resignedly said. "I'll ask Bobby to call the…"

"Sammy, what the hell are you talking about?" Dean hollered. "I'm not going anywhere and neither are you!"

"But"

"But nothing" Dean growled. "We are staying together from now on. And all the crap up to now is gone; its water under the bridge. You and I are starting over with clean slates. But there are going to be some ground rules with the first and most important being no more lies. And no secrets. We tell each other everything from now on. And no going off and doing things on your own. We're a team. Got it?"

"You're, you're not gonna…" Sam broke off as he was suddenly enveloped in a bone crushing hug. Feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders, he melted into his big brother's embrace.

Dean smiled as his little brother relaxed into the hug. The ill young man's breathing quickly evened out signaling that he had fallen asleep. Dean held his younger sibling for a while longer before reluctantly laying him down. They still had some talking to do but it could wait until Sam was better. Dean brushed the stray bangs out of his brother's face before standing and dropping back into the chair he'd been in for the past day and a half. "Sleep well kiddo" he whispered.

AN- This was the hardest chapter I've ever written. I hope it turned out alright.