Chapter 21

A few minutes later saw us on our way. Michael and Sanya were going to freshen up after their twenty-four hour stay in lock-up, while Murphy went to retrieve the samples. She was dropping me off at home along the way, so that I could do some freshening up of my own, as well as prepare for the tracking spell.

As soon as we were off the Carpenter's property, Lacuna appeared in a flash, hovering outside the passenger window. I rolled it down for her, and she slipped in as the motor struggled to raise it again.

"The Guard is watching from a discreet distance," she explained. "No-one will sneak up on us again."

"I don't think they're bothering with us anymore, but thanks," I told her. Glancing to where she was perched on the shoulder of my seat, I gave her a questioning look. "Why were you outside?"

"I did not wish to risk crossing onto their property," she explained without explaining. "Is there anything more I can do to assist you, my lord?"

Murphy snorted at the honorific, which I dutifully ignored. "No, Luna. You've done a fine job." I scowled at her. "And no more offers to sacrifice yourself."

"But—"

"But nothing," I said, cutting her off. "The Denarians caught all of us off guard. There was nothing more you or the others could have done."

Lacuna took a moment to consider my words, before finally nodding. "Very well," she said, accepting my judgment on the matter. "I also apologize for taking so long to expedite your rescue."

"You came as soon as you could," I replied. "I take it you tracked me through the ring?"

The communication ring I wore did more than just let us talk telepathically; it also acted as a homing beacon for her to locate me. It would only work for her, and I assumed that she had begun her search as soon as the Denarians had left with me in tow.

"That is correct," Lacuna confirmed. "Although it failed once they removed it from you. We had to sweep a large area before we finally pinpointed your location." The tiny fairy hesitated, before adding, "I also apologize for not retrieving any of your things."

I sighed as I thought about everything I'd had on me. The hat, duster, rods, and shield bracelet were considerable losses, but given time and resources, I'd could make more.

My mother's amulet was irreplaceable.

The silver pentacle had been give to me by my father. It was the only thing I had of hers, and was the only inheritance remaining from either of them. I'd had a picture once upon a time, but it'd been lost in my time on the run.

I assumed Michael and Sanya hadn't seen anything of my stuff in their search for Shiro. Which meant the Denarians had most likely disposed of all of it. Maybe after everything was over with, I could try and track it down. But my hopes weren't all that high.

"What about my staff?" I asked. It'd been the one thing I hadn't taken inside, which meant it might be the one thing the Denarians hadn't taken.

"We retrieved it," Lacuna confirmed, which elicited a relieved sigh from me. "Toot and some of the others navigated the American Motors Corporation Gremlin back to the house while I tracked your location."

The fairy always referred to the Streetwolves' loaner vehicle by its full make and model, because she didn't want anyone thinking I was getting around town on the back of an actual gremlin.

"That's great, Luna," I told her.

The fairy's wings fell. "We lost three members of the Guard in the battle with the Denarians."

I grimaced, surprised at how deep that struck me. I tended to not think all that much of the smaller fairies around us in the world, but those that had sworn allegiance to me had proven to be loyal and abundantly helpful.

"Who?" I asked quietly.

"Blue Rug, Rhubarb, and Jujube," she said softly. "Colletia was injured, but she should recover."

I looked to the tiny fairy, who's own armor was not unblemished. "We'll avenge them, Luna. Don't worry."

The captain of my household guard snapped a sharp salute. "That we will. I have already begun making preparations."

That surprised me, as did Murphy's comment to the fairy. "That reminds me. Forthill said he'd take care of it."

"I know. Thank you," Lacuna replied with a slight nod. "My people have already retrieved the first supply."

I wanted to ask what they were talking about, but got the distinct impression that they weren't going to fill me in. I knew enough about women to let them plot their own vengeances. A woman scorned, et cetera.

I found myself looking at Murphy as she drove, studying her profile. She sensed my appraisal, and shot a frown in my direction. "What?"

"Thank you," I said softly. "For coming for me."

The detective just shook her head. "Yeah, well. Just be sure to watch your step," she said smartly. "Because one day you're going to step too far. And I'm not going to be there to save you."

I gave an exasperated sigh as she threw my words back in my face. "Okay, I get. I was a bit of an ass."

"A bit?" Murphy replied with wide eyes. "I'm pretty sure you were an entire herd of asses."

"I'm sorry," I insisted. "I've been in a weird place for the last couple of years."

"That's the understatement of the century," Murphy shot back, before letting her tone cool. "I get it. You've been dealing with a lot of crap."

"You have no idea," I replied, looking out the window as the city passed us by.

"I do, actually," Murphy said. When I looked to her, she gave me a long, firm look. "Just because you haven't been around doesn't mean that I haven't kept up on what's going on in this town, mortal-crime or otherwise."

"Yeah, but—" I began.

"The Council kicked you to the curb," Murphy said, cutting me off. "You went on the run from them and from Bianca's assassins, until you struck a deal with the Sidhe. Now you're their assassin, when you're not helping a local gang make my streets worse."

I ignored the barbed last statement. "How…"

Murphy rolled her eyes and threw a thumb in her own direction. "Hello? Let's remember who's the actual detective between the two of us."

I just blinked, so she continued. "I know all about it. More than you could know," she said, shooting me another look before making a turn. "You do bad things for bad creatures. You run with a rough crowd, the kind that doesn't respect kindness and compassion. The kind that would target those close to you," she added, giving voice to one of my original reasons for distancing myself from the others.

"You've been talking to Michael," I said, realizing who her source must me.

Murphy confirmed it with a nod. "Among other people. But yes, he and Charity really helped me after… after that thing with the Nightmare."

I winced. "I would have—"

"Save it, Dresden," Murphy said not unkindly. "You were busy. I get that. Believe it or not, there are other people that I can turn to. It's not your responsibility to fix every wrong."

I nodded. "Still, I'm sorry. I know it couldn't have been easy."

There was a long pause as Murphy navigated the weekend traffic, her eyes distant for a moment. "It wasn't. But after I finished moping about, I got some help. From the Carpenters, and Father Forthill, and some others."

"Ah," I said with another nod. "Forthill's good people."

"The best," Murphy said automatically.

There was another short lull. "He threw holy water on me, you know."

"From what I heard, you asked for it," Murphy replied sharply. "Literally. He caught you breaking into the church to steal holy water."

"I needed it," I explained somewhat petulantly.

"Then you could have just asked for it," Murphy said in an exasperated tone. She cast a bewildered look in my direction. "Damn it, Dresden, when did you stop asking for help?"

I curled my lips, holding back the angry retort that'd sprung to mind. Instead, I said, "Associating with the Winter Knight isn't healthy."

"So you're trying to protect us?" Murphy asked in disbelief. "You're afraid we're going to get drawn into your crap?" She gestured around us, presumably referring to the situation we found ourselves in. "Great job with that."

"No, dammit," I growled, flushing a little at the blunt truth. "Being around me right now is dangerous. For everyone. Hell, Nicodemus was threatening Sía and Michael just a couple nights ago. Just because he'd seen them with me."

When I'd first gone on the run, I'd distanced myself from Murphy, Michael, and the Alphas for just that reason. The Council wouldn't have gone after them, but Bianca's assassins wouldn't hesitate to target my friends. I couldn't risk that.

As time had gone on, and I'd felt more isolated, I'd convinced myself that they'd let me go. That they hadn't tried enough to hold on to the friendship. Eventually the lie became so convincing that I resented them for actions they'd never taken.

But my days of lying to myself were over. Nicodemus had been right. The only person to blame for my isolation was myself.

"Michael can handle himself," Murphy replied, cutting through my thoughts. "So can I."

I didn't want to tell her just how unlikely that seemed, but she seemed to pick up on my doubts anyway. Her eyebrow arched up. "You think I can't, but Sía MacTire can?" When I refused to reply, both her eyebrows rose. "Or is it that she's expendable to you?"

"No," I replied, a little bit of my frustration bubbling up. But to my surprise, there was none of the normal cold anger that accompanied a surge from the mantle. I wondered if that was because of my talk with myself. "Sía and I aren't… we're not together. We're just…"

"Just gangsters with benefits," Murphy finished for me.

Yes, I thought. That's exactly what we are.

While I was on the run, I'd needed help. The Streetwolves provided it, all while I convinced myself that risking their lives was okay; they were criminals, gangsters, lowlifes. They were nothing more than a slightly different variation on Marcone.

But that'd been before I'd gotten to know Sía and the others. Before I'd seen what the gang had become, rather than what I'd known it as back in Parker's day.

And now, I found myself just as protective of them as I'd been of Murphy and the others.

"I'm not a Streetwolf," I insisted, although my heart wasn't in it.

"You can lie to yourself all you want, Dresden. But you can't lie to me," Murphy said quietly as we pulled up in front of my house. She threw her sedan into park and twisted around in the seat. "You've been helping them fight Marcone."

"Yes," I said with a roll of my eyes. "Fine. Yes, I've been helping them push back against Marcone. And against Bianca. Because no-one else is."

"We've been doing what we can," Murphy argued.

"Which isn't enough," I countered. "Look, I get it. You're tied down with a lot of bureaucracy. Marcone and Bianca both have too much pull in this town. You're never going to be able to do anything against them."

"That doesn't mean we should work outside the law," Murphy said, her tone hard and unyielding. "Working with the Streetwolves is just picking one group of bad guys over another."

"They're nowhere near Marcone's level," I assured her. "They're staying out of the drug trade and prostitution. And their protection services aren't a facade like Marcone's; they actually help protect people from the other gangs."

"That's something better left to the cops," Murphy said, her tone firm.

"Maybe they'd leave it to them, if so many weren't on the man's payroll."

The detective's jaw tensed. "If you think any of my people—"

"No, Murphy," I said, cutting her off before she got going. "I know you run a clean ship. But you've got one department out of how many?" I looked to her in earnest. "Honestly. How many of the other squads are squeaky clean? How many haven't been bought off by Marcone and Bianca?"

"I can't vouch for the entire force," she conceded, before shooting a hard look at me. "But the Streetwolves are buying people just as much as the others."

"Better them than someone worse," I insisted. "The Streetwolves aren't angels, but they aren't the enemy."

"Shades of gray, Dresden," Murphy said with a shake of her head. "A bad tree can't produce good fruit."

Her choice of phrase hit me harder than anything else, and I think she sensed it. "Harry," she said softly. "Listen to me. I know we've had our problems in the past, but…" She trailed off as she looked around, afraid to meet my eyes for the same reason I kept them averted. "You can come to me. You can come to Michael. We can help you. Don't surround yourself with bad people just because you're afraid of getting us dirty. If you do, you'll just let yourself slip further away."

I stared out the window, watching the winter wind blow specks of ice and snow from a branch overhead. The limb seemed to perk up once it was relieved of the weight.

But if I'd learned anything, it was that there would always be more snow.

"I'll keep that in mind," I said. Murphy recognized it as the polite capstone to her impromptu intervention that it was, and her shoulders sagged just a little. "Thanks."

The woman nodded. "Sure."

I sat there for another moment, knowing we were wasting valuable time. But seeing as this was the most civil we'd been since the night of Bianca's party, I wanted to make the moment last. "How's Mister?"

The question seemed to surprise her. "He's good," she said. "A bit temperamental. I don't let him out."

"Murph, you gotta let him out," I said with a roll of my eyes. "The big cat's gotta hunt."

"It's not safe," she replied with a frown. "There's too much traffic in the neighborhood."

"He'll be fine," I assured her. "Nothing short of a T-Rex is going to get the better of him."

"Tell that to his tail," she replied archly.

"I think that's what got the tail to begin with."

The exchange drew smiles out of both of us, before a blare of a passing car-horn drew us back to reality. Murphy's face grew somewhat pensive as she thought about what she was about to do. "I could really lose my job for removing evidence, you know."

"I know."

A desperate laugh escaped her lips. "Listen to me, the ultimate hypocrite. Telling you not to work outside of the law right before I go and break it."

"I'm sorry."

Murphy considered it for another moment, before giving off a sharp puff of breath. "Alright. Give me a little bit and I'll bring what I can."

"It's the only way," I assured her.

"I know," she replied. She shot me a dark look. "Get a move on, Dresden. The apocalypse isn't going to wait on us."

I nodded at that, and opened the passenger door. Lacuna drifted out, having remained silent to let us talk. She disappeared toward the property line, no doubt to coordinate with the rest of the household guard. "I'll see you in a little bit."

Murphy grunted a farewell, and I closed the door, watching as she drove off to commit what was effectively treason against her own department. To do bad things in order to right a greater wrong. To do what needed to be done.

I could relate to that.