Author: The story has officially ended in this chapter. While my decision is leaning on a sequel, a part of me is urging to create a story set within the same universe of this story, but kind of like an alternate timeline. It's the same, but there will be moderate changes. In a way, I'm thinking of an alternate scenario.
Anyhow, the part about Minato Saki having a serious conversation with Warspite regarding Tirpitz might be changed.
Two months has passed since Tirpitz's supposed passing. Everyone knew she is already dead and she prefers it that way. While the admiral is currently away, Bismarck gently brushes her finger on the Iron cross that once belonged to Tirpitz.
"It's been two months. It still hurts, you know..."
Other than the Iron cross, Bismarck also held the last picture they had together in the naval base. Tears would always drop every time she would look at the only thing she could ever look at her sister. With her gone, all that's left is the memories and the reminders left behind.
"Still moping, I see..."
Gangut, Tirpitz's good friend and reliable partner back when she was in Russia, found Bismarck sitting by the cape all by herself. Ever since she watched Tirpitz "die", Bismarck had a slight change of personality. She grew to hate fate itself for taking her sister away again and she became serious to make sure she wouldn't lose someone important to her again.
"It's alright though. Moving on isn't instant. Some takes months or years even. That's why it's alright to take it slowly, Bismarck" Gangut sat beside her
"I was very excited that day, you know...but then in an instant...I lost Tirpitz"
"I was there too when it happened and I know it hurts a lot...to watch someone important to you...go like that"
Gangut removed her cap and lowered it near to her chest level. She closed her eyes and raised her head, facing the sky.
"When we were young, I promised her I won't let anything happen to her. I broke that promise...again"
Bismarck bit her lip, restraining her tears from streaming down.
"When Tirpitz first sunk, I thought I wouldn't see her again. Then when she turned out to be alive, I swore I wouldn't lose her again..."
"Bismarck..."
"I lost my sister, I don't want to lose my comrades too. That's why from this forward...I'll do anything to protect everyone"
Bismarck stood up, steeling her resolve. She doesn't want to be the Bismarck who couldn't even protect her own sister...twice. After losing Tirpitz for the second time, Bismarck had just enough so she swore she won't lose the comrades dearest to her.
"Gangut, I won't let this pain hold me down again. I know can't stay sad forever, you know"
"That's the spirit..." Gangut stood up as well
Bismarck looked at the Iron cross tightly gripped on her hand and flipped it to its back, smiling at the name engraved on it.
(I don't know if you'll come back, but when you do...I'll definitely find you, Tirpitz)
Deep inside, Bismarck hope, even for the slightest chance, of the possibility that Tirpitz might come back...even if as an Abyssal again. She hoped, completely unaware of the truth...
Meanwhile...
Minato Saki, the person that replaced Tirpitz as the admiral of the naval district, visited her empty western style grave. She laid down a small bouquet of flowers and tipped off her cap.
"I hope you rest in peace...even if you're not actually dead and still here, right?"
She looked back when a figure wearing a military coat walked towards her. The figure whose face is shaded by a cap turns out to be Tirpitz or rather...Northern Beast Princess herself.
"You faked your own death. Is this really what you think is for the best?"
"I can't stay any longer anyway. That's why I just went along with Arkhangelsk's unexpected surprise"
Her skin had slowly started to become pale and her bright red Abyssal eyes are clearly visible now.
"You feel guilty pretending to be someone who's already dead. I never thought an Abyssal would ever have such feelings"
"I may be an Abyssal, but I don't forget how I am the other half of the real Tirpitz. Maybe I am becoming like Tirpitz the more I live with her memories"
Much like any other ships, Tirpitz is composed of two opposite sides which both represents aspects of her personality. The shipgirl possessed the positive side while the Abyssal possessed the negative side. No matter how different the two are, it can't be brushed off how they are both the same being, albeit "separated".
"You left because you can't bear telling Bismarck the truth"
"..."
"An Abyssal with human emotions. Now this is a first..."
"Tirpitz took the shell meant for Bismarck knowing she would sink. She sacrificed herself to protect the most important person to her. That's just how Tirpitz is"
Northern Beast Princess smiled, thinking what kind of person Tirpitz is compared to the real one.
"You hated humanity, so why do something like this?"
"I did hate humanity and I have to admit a part of me still do. My hate only faded when Tirpitz and I found closure with each other"
The Beast referred to the event where she rampaged in Japan and had to be stopped by the shipgirls of Maizuru naval district. Fortunately, Bismarck managed to reach out to her sister before she is beyond salvation.
"You know you can't run from this. There will be a day where you will have to tell the truth"
"I know..."
"Geez. You should have told the truth earlier and save all of us the trouble"
Saki clicked her tongue, obviously annoyed at how she got dragged into this situation. She doesn't even know why she agreed to keep this a secret. She pitied herself for keeping quiet and just let everyone in the base be oblivious.
"Now you have to think what to say when Bismarck finds out about this"
"It doesn't really concern me much" Northern Beast Princess replied in an uninterested manner
"You're a cold one, aren't you? Fits your title well"
"It's normal for someone like me who spent my whole life in the northern fjords of Norway. Even as an Abyssal, I remained in solitude. Attacking both Abyssals and shipgirls who disturb me"
She laid down the flower she brought for Tirpitz's grave. She didn't just stopped by in the open to speak with Saki. She also did so to pay respect to her deceased shipgirl self even if the humans see is a dead admiral who was killed by a British battleship who is a part of the Russian Navy.
"I know Bismarck and I will meet again"
"What are you going to do when that time comes?"
"I'll stop running away the same way Tirpitz stopped running away from her past"
She smiled after remembering how Tirpitz stood to face her, determined to face what she has been afraid to do so - her own past.
"You have to understand, even if Tirpitz will come back...it's not going to be a good idea"
"Huh? Why is that?"
"She's not going to be the Tirpitz everyone knew. She'll go back to how she originally used to be. The lonely Queen of the North feared...by her own comrades"
Saki blinked her eyes, not knowing what kind of Tirpitz she is talking about. The "Tirpitz" Saki knew is the one who took on the role of an admiral.
"Tirpitz only changed when she stopped being alone. When she met Scharnhorst"
"..."
"It's confusing to you know, but the Tirpitz you got to met is only the human side. It's not her original personality"
The Beast tipped off her cap, her own way of waving goodbye and gesture that she's leaving.
"By the way, take care of those girls for Tirpitz's sake, okay?"
"You..." Saki never thought the Beast cared for shipgirls
"Even if they won't forgive me for lying to them, I want to at least make sure they'll be safe. That's why I'm leaving them in your capable hands, Frau Saki"
"Don't worry. As the admiral of Maizuru naval district, I'll take good care of those girls. It's my job after all"
Saki smirked and assured the Beast she will take care of the shipgirls Tirpitz once handled before her tragic sinking.
"Wait - where are you going now?" Saki almost forgot to ask
"A country in the North, Russia"
"R-Russia?"
"There's something I wish to find out there. Even if I don't want to go there due to Tirpitz's trauma, I'm willing to set it aside for this...mission"
"You've got a lot of thing going on, huh"
"I'll be leaving for a while, but..."
The Beast tossed out what seems to be a phone. Saki inspected it in every angle and found no peculiarity in the phone tossed to her. It's just an ordinary cellphone that everyone uses nowadays.
"If you ever needed my help, I'll come back"
"Don't worry. I'll keep in touch"
Saki waved the phone and jokingly replied in an energetic manner. Trusting the human she never personally met before, Northern Beast Princess left the scene before can find out "how a dead person came back from the dead" and her connection with Saki. She doesn't want to create unnecessary trouble for her and everyone in Maizuru naval district, so she chose to stay dead...as it should be.
We'll meet again, Bismarck. When that time comes...you have to remember what truly happened...
Maizuru naval district...
Donitz dug through a box where a portion of Tirpitz's belongings are stored. That particular box contained albums, picture frames and the like. While most of Tirpitz's belongings are off limits other than the secretary ship, Donitz is allowed when she persuaded Nagato she only wished to see old pictures back in the day.
"Hmm? This is..."
Upon flipping through one of the albums, she found pictures of Tirpitz's days back in Russia. Most of those pictures included Gangut as the two spend a lot of their time together and rarely apart when they becamed close partners. One 'special' picture kept on the last page and occupying the whole page entirely is the one where Project A-150, codenamed 'Yuki', is clinging to Tirpitz's arm and posing. While Tirpitz isn't very open to the idea of close physical contact, she can tolerate it if that person is someone she is comfortable to be with.
"You two looked so happy back then. Too bad both of you are now gone..."
Donitz restrained herself from damaging both the album and the picture out of the anger she felt when she remembered how Tirpitz died. She could still clearly refresh one of the last conversations she had with Tirpitz before her death two months ago. That particular conversation happened before Northern Beast Princess took Tirpitz's place. Though like the others, Donitz is still unaware the Tirpitz they knew already sunk and the one that "died" in the explosion is her Abyssal self posing as her.
"You know, after I discovered about how shipgirls and Abyssals are bound to the endless cycle of rebirth, it made me a bit...scared" Tirpitz shook her glass of beer
"You're scared?"
"With every death I see, I can feel myself getting...numb. I'm afraid to be in the cold again. I'm scared that some day of being...that"
"That?"
"It's a bit vague, but I felt like I was a different person before. Someone who cared very little about feelings and attachments. It was like all I cared was fighting..."
To Tirpitz, it was like a dream. In that dream, she saw herself standing in the open sea, breathing heavily while her sight is fixated with the floating Abyssal corpses bleeding around her. She wiped the blood off her mouth, thinking more about how cold it is rather than how much her wounds hurt. She looked at her "comrades" who all suffered the same amount of damage as her. She couldn't feel the slightest warmth for them. She just couldn't...
"Even though I sunk before, I'm still scared of sinking like everyone else. I don't want to forget the memories I have with everyone" Tirpitz smiled, yet there was sadness
"Tirpitz..."
"Even now, I keep forgetting about my own life. The life I once had as..."
Tirpitz uttered a single and unfamiliar word to Donitz. That single word? It's Tirpitz's name back when she is still an ordinary human. After becoming a shipgirl, Tirpitz too the identity of the soul of the battleship she possess as her own identity.
"There are time where I would forget my old life. I'm scared that there will be a time where I would forget what mattered to me entirely"
"You're not going to forget anything. So don't feel so scared..." Donitz patted Tirpitz in the back
"Donitz..."
Much like Bismarck, Donitz acts as the reliable and supportive older sister not just to Tirpitz but to the "young ones" as well. She may have changed a bit after Project A-150, Yuki's sinking, but she's still the kind and protective person she was once.
"I hope...you're right"
It felt like Tirpitz wanted to ask something personal to Donitz, but discarded her thought and changed her words entirely. While Tirpitz would sometimes speak about her "loneliness" and how much she disliked the nickname given to her, Donitz never thought Tirpitz feared of forgetting herself. Back then, she didn't understood why Tirpitz is afraid of forgetting...and she still didn't understand up until to this day. After returning the album at the box right where she took it out from, Donitz exited the storage, dusting off her coat and cap.
Office...
Quietly inside the office, Saki tosses the phone given to her by the beast up and down. Surprisingly, even without looking, she could easily catch the phone without the fear of dropping it on the ground. Her cool blue eyes, blankly gazed at Warspite, who patiently waits for the admiral herself to start the conversation.
"I can understand why the little Russian is in this, but I don't know about yours..."
"Because I feared taking the risk" Warspite instantly replied
She answered with a straight and calm look in her face. With how she confidently responded, even Saki is unsure whether Warspite could be telling the truth or not. She's a lady of many secrets and despite her good nature, she hides dark secrets of her own.
"What risk?"
"The Beast made a point. Even if the battleship Tirpitz were to return, there's no guarantee it will be the same one we knew. She had already sunk thrice"
"..."
As a human, Saki made it visible through her facial expression how sinking and being reborn works. Yet she knows being confused at the situation wouldn't work. Warspite is well aware someone like Saki wouldn't easily understand so she took the liberty of explaining it in a way a human like Saki would understand.
"Admiral, sinking has a risk of taking a toll on either the mind or the body. When she first came back as a shipgirl, it took a toll on her body. It's why she couldn't sail"
Warspite referred to Tirpitz's first return six years ago. When she was found, Warspite discovered Tirpitz's physical state is in no condition to sail as her body would suffer excruciating pain when equipping her rigging.
"When the Beast rampaged in the sea of Japan, Tirpitz sunk for the second time. When she returned, the sinking had damaged her mental state. She was already beginning to forget"
"Beginning to forget?" Saki tilted her head
"There are times she would forget who she was once before she became Tirpitz. She kept suffering short term memory losses"
This is already proven as Tirpitz once spoke to Donitz how she tends to forget things on some days. Neither Donitz or Tirpitz are aware that it is caused by her sinking the second time.
"And three months ago, she sunk for the third time"
"Three strikes and you're out. It's kind of like that, isn't it?"
"Perhaps. How many sinkings a shipgirl can handle varies with everyone" Warspite shrugged her her shoulder"
"So this like a gamble, huh. Talk about fate..."
SakiSaki smirked and leaned her head to rest on her arm. While she may not be a shipgirl, Saki have a bit of understanding about the effects of sinking to a shipgirl like Warspite.
"I may not know Schwarze as the shipgirl you call Tirpitz, but I know she's already had enough of the world...but she had another reason to keep on going and that's everyone here"
Tirpitz would always speak about how everyone in the naval base is very important to her. Being their admiral and getting to know them is something she felt glad happened to her. If it wasn't for them, she wouldn't have a reason to keep on smiling.
"At one point she told me how she doesn't want to change how she feels. She strangely said how she prefers to have emotions, good and bad, rather than have none"
Saki remembered Tirpitz looking away when speaking about the second statement. Yet she felt great worry in her tone alone. In truth, Tirpitz is afraid to lose her feelings. The ones she developed during her time as an admiral.
"Those words alone are enough to tell...she knew at some point, she could lose them"
"Perhaps the former admiral prepared for such a possibility. One must always fear for the worst whilst hoping for the best"
Warspite is the one who taught Tirpitz to have such mentality and assumption in this world. Warspite is Tirpitz's mentor so she takes her advice to a heart.
"Fear for the worst and hope for the best, huh. To me it's just fate itself...screwing with everyone"
Even Saki is bitter towards fate itself. Well, even she is upset how shipgirls suffers way worse than most humans. They are born with the purpose to fight in the war they never started.
"Honestly, what's going on inside your mind...Schwarze?"
Saki lifted a framed picture of her and Tirpitz in one of the few occasions they will meet.
"Aaaaah. I just hope that Beast knows what she is doing. It's all I can do for now while she's out in the North...looking for a certain shipgirl"
Warspite slightly raised her head, indicating she has knowledge about the shipgirl Saki is referring to indirectly. While Warspite has her doubts, Saki decided to trust the decision Northern Beast Princess made.