Chapter Twenty-One: Happy Days Part One
A/N: Aww, this chapter reminds me of the song… Happy Days! So I'm writing this one a little differently. It's going to have little excerpts of each day of the month that the happy candy lasts. Because if you all remember in that last chapter; Midouri gave Sasume a 'Happy Thoughts' candy so she wouldn't be upset. So like I said, it's going to be a day by day. There are going to be a lot of fun moments in this one. I hope they make you laugh like they made me laugh as I wrote them! Plus… Things get spicy and a little lemony… But that's why this is only part one… Many parts of Happy Days to comeeeee! BWUAHHAHAHAHAHAH!
Sasume: You would laugh to yourself like a maniac.
Author L: You were laughing right along with me Sasume-san, if I can remember correctly.
Sasume: Pft, your imagination running wild with you.
Author L: Ahh, Shuddaaapp.
Sasume: You're just rude.
Author L: You're the one always putting me down! I'm going to write a fanfic where you fall into a hole and can't come out!
Sasume: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Author L: YESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! MWUHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! OKAY FANFIC TIME!
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! Tuesday: August 25th; 1st Day of Candy
Sasume woke up around five in the morning and threw open her window to let the first ray of sunshine in. She sighed deeply and exclaimed, "Oh, what a beautiful day!" She ran to the bathroom to brush her teeth and get dressed.
XXX
L woke up at about six in the morning. The first thing that hit him was the strong and delicious aroma of waffles; most likely waffles smothered in syrup, whip cream, and strawberries. Ryuzaki quickly put on a fresh white long sleeve shirt and threw on his jeans. He used his nose to guide him to the kitchen where he found Sasume creating a feast.
"Is my Lawliet-kun hungry this morning," she asked with the biggest smile L had ever seen.
Ryuzaki wasn't sure what to make of the situation so he nodded slowly.
"Good," beamed Sasume as she set a huge stack of waffles at the table.
L took a seat and poked at his waffles as if they were poisoned, "Sasume-san wouldn't be trying to kill me off would she?"
Sasume got quiet for a minute and then erupted with laugher. "Why on earth would I do that? I mean aren't we all so lucky to be alive especially on such a nice day as this one, hmm?"
L looked at her in disbelief and established to himself that there was a two percent chance he was frightened. "What has gotten into Sasume-san this morning?"
Sasume giggled and said, "I don't know but I feel supercalifragilisticalidocious!"
"Super what?" L asked with a frown.
Sasume began to twirl around the room and began to sing the word to him as if she were an opera star with the lead role. "Suuuupeeerrrr Caliiii Fraaaaa gggiiiiii liii stiiiiic Expiiiii Aliiii Dooo Re Me Fa So La Ti Do Liiciouuusss!"
Ryuzaki was now hiding behind the couch, clinging to it for dear life as Sasume danced about the room. He now established there was a six percent chance he was frightened.
NASCAR! Wednesday: August 26th; 2nd Day of Candy
"Sasume-san must watch the road more carefully!" L had buckled almost every seatbelt to him that he could. Sasume had been driving like a mad person and did not listen to L's pleas for her to stop.
"VROOOOOMMM!" Sasume made the noise of a car revving up its engine as her car hit 70mph on a 45 mph zone. "VROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!"
"Sasume-san is not a NASCAR Driver," wailed L from the passenger's seat as she hit 75mph.
Sasume cackled something wickedly strange and that had lifted the six percent chance of L being frightened to seven percent. "Calm down Lawliet-kun," she hollered as she flipped the radio on and bumped the song One Way or Another by Blondie. "This. Is. My. JAM," Sasume announced as she turned a sharp corner.
"Sasume-san is going to kill us," said L as he cringed, ready for impact at any moment.
"Don't be silly," she laughed as she flew past a stop sign.
"Sasume-san should obey the law! She just ran a stop sign," said L now fearing seven percent was about to become seven and a half percent.
"Shh. I need to concentrate. We're almost at the finish line," she said with a wide grin.
Crikey! Thursday: August 27th; 3rd Day of Candy
L wasn't quite sure how he was still in one piece after another one of Sasume's NASCAR races but he was glad. He was panting from the excitement of the race. Sasume was now in the student parking lot. She had dropped the whole NASCAR act and now took on the persona of the Crocodile Hunter.
"Sasume-san almost hit a squirrel today," commented Ryuzaki as they cruised the parking lot.
"Shh," hissed Sasume in some crazy Australian accent, "These parking spots scare easily."
"Scare easily," asked L putting his thumb to his mouth, giving it many worried nibbles.
"Yes, mate. We must always remember that they're just as scared of you as you are of them."
"I see," said L with a frown as Sasume slowed the car to what L deducted to be 2mph. He almost wished she was a NASCAR racer again.
"CRIKEY," Sasume screeched as she slammed the brakes. Lucky for L she was going 2mph because if she were going faster and braked the way she did, L might have flown out a window.
"What is it now," L grumbled, slightly annoyed.
"Isn't it a real Byoot, mate?" Sasume had started going 2mph again. "I've never seen a Croc like that one. Let's get a better look-see."
The moment Sasume's tire had gotten near the white lines of the parking spot she threw the car in reverse and hit the gas. "Crikey it's got me arm," she shrieked as the car began to spin erratically around the student parking lot, "It's got us in death roll. That Croc is one angry Sheila!"
Ryuzaki did a crazy maneuver and managed to get himself in the driver's seat with Sasume in the passenger's seat. He glided the car gently into the parking spot with little trouble. "There," he said firmly, "I ran over the Croc."
Russian Spies! Thursday: August 28th; 4th Day of Candy
Sasume emerged from the car with her two hands clasped together resembling a gun. She rolled to L's side of the car and whispered, "Get down," to Ryuzaki. This time, Ryuzaki didn't put up a fight. "The enemy may see us," Sasume said quietly, "Now when I give you the signal we're going to both run to that white Mercedes and take cover."
Just like the day before, L and Sasume miraculously made it to the white car. "Now," Sasume whispered, "On the count of three we're going to run to the yellow bug… You go left, I go right… If you get fired on; zigzag your way to the red BMW…1…2…3!"
Sasume made a mad dash for the yellow Volkswagen Beetle and L casually walked to it. "Get down," Sasume hissed, "The enemy will see you."
"How about we make peace with the enemy for now so we're not late to class or sign an armistice… a truce?" L begged of her.
A serious look washed over Sasume's face as she spoke, "Where's your dignity as a Russian spy?! Boris, we are almost there…"
"Oh great…" L had thought he had detected a Russian accent.
"But Natasha," L cried without attempting the Russian accent which Sasume was surprisingly good at, "We're going to be late to class and miss out on the doughnuts Mr. Maragami promised to bring."
"Quiet Boris, I know what I'm doing," Sasume instructed as she scaled a fake wall and landed herself by the school gate that led to L's freedom, "Hurry Boris!"
"Yes Natasha," said L in an overdramatic voice as he strolled to the gate, "Okay Natasha our mission is complete now."
Soooo Happy! Friday: August 29th; 5th Day of Candy
The weird part was that as soon as Sasume had dropped the whole Boris and Natasha act she would become somewhat normal.
"Today's super gorgeous," Sasume had said to L Friday, "Super Duper!"
L cringed when he heard the word 'super', fearing Sasume would say that crazy, excruciatingly long word again.
"We're just so lucky to be alive," she kept saying with such a big smile that L in fact, did believe it himself.
"Sasume-san has been very… strange lately," L commented, feeling safer because the seven and a half percent of being frightened had gone down to one percent.
"Have I? I've felt soooo happy lately," Sasume declared with a goofy smile.
"I've noticed," L said thinking one percent would turn to two percent any moment now.
"Oh that's great that you've noticed Ryuga-kun because now you can learn from my example and be a happy person much like myself!"
Me So Horny! Saturday: August 30th; 6th Day of Candy
Sasume woke up a Saturday morning in a cleaning mood. She combated her newest enemy, the dust bunnies, with her feather duster. She started dusting the living room first and had worked her way upstairs. She was humming the "Happy Working Song" from the movie Enchanted. She had just finished up her room and the bathroom, and was on her way to L's room. She burst through the door in a cute French maid outfit, feather duster in hand.
"Sasume-san what on earth," L said in awe with his jaw dropped nearly to the floor. "What is it you are doing in here dressed like that?!"
"Well," Sasume said sticking a pinky to her pouting lips, "I felt like cleaning this morning and its time to clean your room."
L's heart skipped a beat as he realized an incident was occurring that he had experienced about 14 years ago.
"Lawliet-kun," Sasume said as she approached home with a sexy strut. She bent over slightly to look at his red face better, unintentionally showing more cleavage, "Lawliet-kun's face is flushed!"
Ryuzaki grabbed his pillow and placed it over his embarrassing spectacle. "Sasume-san needs to learn to knock first," L said anxiously.
"Well, I'll be out of your way in a little while," she said cheerily, "Let me just finish dusting and I'll be out of your hair."
Sasume began to dust furiously, making sure no corner was left untouched or undusted. Ryuzaki still clutched the pillow to himself, hoping Sasume wouldn't see. Sasume began singing the "Happy Working Song" and was bending over in various ways as she dusted. L squirmed nervously from his spot. He could feel himself getting worse since he caught a glimpse of the sexiest pair of frilly white lace panties he had ever seen.
"Sasume-san," he almost choked out, "That's good enough."
"Oh just a few more spots!" She cried jovially as she stood on her tiptoes to clear the dust off a bookshelf. L gulped down as he caught another glimpse of her frilly panties.
"Sasume-san should not wear such a provocative outfit," L said apprehensively as he took deep breaths.
"Oh you don't like the way I look Lawliet-kun," she asked him with a pout as she stood by him.
L gulped again, unsure if Sasume was trying to seduce him or not. It was highly unlike her yet there she was in a French maid outfit causing him to remember his manhood and standing too close for comfort. "Sasume-san… looks very… enticing," L remarked nervously, waiting for the feather duster to come crashing down on his head for sounding perverted but it never came. He looked up to see a huge smile on her face.
"Oh Lawliet-kun thinks so," she cooed as she returned to her work, singing a silly song.
"All right Lawliet-kun, time to tidy things up," she sang as she bent over to pick up some trash on the floor, revealing her laced lingerie again.
"Come my little Lawliet-kun! As we all sing a happy little working song; Merry little voices clear and strong. Come and roll your sleeves up so that we can pitch in cleaning crud up in the kitchen; as we sing along! And you'll trill a cheery tune in the tub as we scrub a stubborn mildew stain lug a hairball from the shower drain to the gay refrain of a happy working song,"
"We'll keep singing without fail otherwise we'd spoil it; hosing down the garbage pail and scrubbing up the toilet! Ooh!" Sasume cried as she gave her bra a little tug. L began sweating slightly from the sight.
"How we all enjoy letting loose with a little La-da-da-dum-dum," sang her voice as she gave her bra more tugs, making L sweat it even more.
"While we're emptying the vacu-um. It's such fun to hum a happy working song! Oo-ooh, a happy working song!" Sasume began to vacuum the carpets with a vacuum that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. She ran furiously about the room with the vacuum in hand, allowing it to suck up any dust bunnies that took cover underneath the bed. She gave L a smile as she vacuumed the area by him and he gave her a sheepish half smile.
"Oh, how strange a place to be 'til Lawliet-kun comes for me! My heart is sighing… Still, as long as I am here… I guess a new experience could be worth trying… Hey! Keep drying! You could do a lot when you got such a happy little tune to hum while you're sponging up the soapy scum! We adore each filthy chore that we determine so friends even though you're vermin… We're a happy working song. Singing as we fetch the detergent box or the smelly shirts and the stinky socks. Sing along if you cannot sing then hum along as we're finishing our happy working song!" Sasume finished all her cleaning and put away her cleaning equipment.
"Ah...wasn't this fun?" She sang the last line to the song as she collapsed on L's bed next to him. L was clutching the pillow to his crotch and gripped it more when he spotted her on his bed.
"Lawliet-kun is sweating," Sasume laughed, "And I did all the work!"
"Sasume-san should leave now," L breathed lightly but still gripping the pillow.
Sasume sat up and cried, "I did all that hard work and you want me to leave? Well you shall not rain on my parade! Now stop clutching that pillow! I need to make your bed!"
Sasume snatched L's safety pillow and placed it on the bed as she began to rearrange the sheets in their proper order. "Fine," she said, "All done!"
L's embarrassing spectacle was no longer hidden and he shoved his thumb into his mouth to gnaw on it vehemently, praying Sasume wouldn't see it.
"Lawliet-kun," she asked with a weird expression, "What is that?!" She pointed to his awkward display and laughed.
"Nothing," he practically shouted as he threw his pillow over it.
"Show me Lawliet-kun," Sasume cried out with a giggle as she began to clutch the pillow.
"No Sasume-san! It is nothing for you to see!" L held the pillow close to the shameful manifestation that had shamed him through all of puberty.
Sasume's hands went under the pillow in order to get a better grip on it. "I feel it! What are you hiding Lawliet-kun?"
"Stop feeling it you're making it worse," he groaned with worry as her hands grazed it.
Sasume finally tore the pillow away to reveal what L had been hiding. "That's… that's a… b-b-bo-bo-bo…"
"Ner," L finished angrily yet somewhat relieved it was out in the open.
"Why would Lawliet-kun get one of those," she asked with a little school girl giggle.
L got up from his bed and pinned Sasume to a wall but he did so gently. "Because Sasume-san wakes up early in the morning after I just had a… an interesting… dream about her... and Sasume-san barges in my room without knocking in a cute French maid outfit. Sasume-san bends over many times to clean up trash revealing her frilly white laced panties that she most likely purchased from Victoria's Secret and she leans forward to reveal appealing cleavage… Sasume-san twirls about my room showing off her sexy figure and Sasume-san made me horny," L said in a low voice that was almost a sexual growl, "Now, I want her very badly but cannot have her."
Sasume felt almost flustered, seeing as she was pinned to a wall and L was talking crazy to her. "Lawliet-kun could have said something," she murmured.
"I tried to do so many times but Sasume-san was relentless in her exhibiting of her figure and made me hornier," L hissed at her as he placed his head in the crook of her neck.
Sasume could feel such hot breath on her neck and couldn't help but feel a little weak in the knees. Sasume also couldn't help but to allow her hands to run through L's raven hair. He moaned from her touch and pounded against the wall with his fists in frustration.
"Get out… Sasume-san, get out," L snarled through clenched teeth.
"But why?" She asked with a sad look. "Was I not making Lawliet-kun happy just now? Does Lawliet-kun not—"
"Yes Sasume-san… I desire you too strongly… Please get out now so I have some time to think," he said with a long sigh.
Sasume nodded slowly and squirmed a bit to do as L instructed her.
"Wait," L breathed, hot breath tickling her neck. He removed his head from the crook of her neck and gazed into her eyes. After a few moments his eyes fell back down to her neck and his head followed them. His lips were on her warm and soft neck; she felt so vulnerable in his hands. He kissed her neck lightly with soft feathery kisses and then left the final kiss to linger on her jaw but never on her lips. "Sasume-san," he whispered into her ear, "You may leave me now."
A/N: Wow I'm feeling a bit steamy myself!
Sasume: You're sick!
Author L: WHAT? I'm ALLOWED to fee HOT and STEAMY if I WANT TO!
Sasume: No! Not that!
Author L: What do you mean then Sasume-san?
Real L: She meant she wanted you to finish the scene
Author L: (grimaces) You little sickos… Perverts, really.
Sasume: (blushes) Well it would have been NICE and it would have meant that Lawliet-kun and I finally kissed!!! BUT NO!!! You like torturing your readers too much!
Midouri: I thought it was a great scene. I myself, even felt slightly warm.
Sasume: Oh you perfect virgin angel… aren't you soooo innocent? Well I got news for you, you pampered little—
Author L: (clamps hand over Sasume's mouth) Heh… Heh… BYE READERS…
Real L: (sticks thumb into mouth and turns into a super cute chibi) Review for me.
Author L: Yeah… Just because he says for you to review I'll get like 4456463740 reviews but when I ask you guys to review I get about 8.
Real L: It's all about the delivery and punch line.
Author L: (glares) Shut up. BYE. NOW.