Chapter 21 - Loser

BLAINE POV

Yeah, I was an asshole.

But, I didn't care.

I was lonely, depressed and hurt. And, I was feeling mean.

Kurt dumped me for a loser. He wouldn't even be my friend anymore. Fine. You wanna fuck me over? I'll fuck you right back. Only harder.

I really was out of my mind. The depression was eating my brain cells. I had taken my mom's car and driven to Kurt's house early Saturday morning, just to see if he left and went anywhere. Could I be more of a psycho stalker?

Sure enough, Karofsky picked him up and they drove to the park. I almost lost them in the park. I hadn't come prepared to hike and they had hiked and hiked and hiked to that clearing. I completely understood why. It was a great place. So secluded and private and hard to find. No one would know you were there. Except a crazy ex-boyfriend who was following you.

So, now Kurt was coming to see me. Sweet, sweet Kurt. I hoped to seduce him. I wanted him back. I was lonely. I missed him. If I could just get him away from that loser for an evening, I was sure I could make him see reason. I could offer him so much more. For starters, being out. Not having to hide. I couldn't imagine how they had been carrying on for this long. Hiding a relationship sucks. I know that better than anyone.

Kurt would have to see that I was better for him.

I needed him.

I was so lonely.

God, I missed Jeremiah.

KURT POV

I wasn't scared of Blaine.

I had thought about it and decided that he would not try to hurt me. I was going to talk sense into him and get those photos. Blaine had always been a confident, smart, proud gay kid. I couldn't believe he would actually out someone. Yes, his ego was hurt about the breakup and yes, I did cheat on him but, that wasn't enough to push Blaine over the edge. Unless something else was going on, I was sure I could make him see reason.

After all, what would he gain by outing David? Yes, I would be hurt because David would be hurt but, in the end, David's coming out would work in my favor. Assuming he didn't go to jail for killing Blaine, it would bring us closer as we worked on helping people accept us.

I just had to get those pictures.

As I pulled up to the house, I started feeling nervous. Maybe this wasn't a good idea.

XXXXXX

I could sense something was different about Blaine, the moment he opened the door. He looked...dark and menacing. His face looked older and worn, as if he hadn't been sleeping well. He also looked more muscular as if he had been working out. A little voice of panic started talking to me but, I pushed it aside.

"Good evening Kurt."

"Hi. You look different."

"I've been playing soccer."

"Oh."

Silence

"Well Kurt, you look beautiful as always."

"Thank you."

"I can tell that Karofskys been fucking you well."

The tiny panic voice got a little louder.

"Listen Blaine. Let's talk about this. I did not come here to sleep with you."

He raised his eyebrows. "Oh? Really? Then why are you here?"

"I came to talk to you. You've always been a wonderful role model for being proud of who you are and confident and strong. You are not the asshole guy who outs other people. That's not you Blaine."

"Well, you know what Kurt? Being confident and strong and proud of who I am, obviously didn't work to keep you, now did it? You preferred the guy who was insecure, weak and in the closet."

"That's not fair. You rejected me Blaine and it hurt. It really hurt. I'll admit, Karofsky came along when I was really vulnerable because of what you did but, I really do love him and he really loves me and we work. Our relationship works and..."

"Enough! I don't wanna hear this shit Kurt. I didn't invite you here to talk about Karofsky. I invited you here to talk about us."

He stepped forward. I stepped back.

"Blaine, there is no us."

"But, there could be."

"No. There can't. I'm with David and I'm staying with him."

"You could leave him and come back to me. Think about it Kurt? We had a lot of fun together."

He stepped forward again. I stepped back.

"But, you didn't want me, remember? Not completely."

"But, I want you now."

He stepped forward again. I stepped back again. And hit the wall.

I was trapped. And scared.

"Blaine...please..."

Suddenly, he was on me. Pressing up against me. I could feel his erection. He was trying to kiss me but I wouldn't let him. He grabbed my face and dug his fingers into my cheeks to hold my face still. He kissed me on the mouth. I pushed him away and tried to run but, he grabbed me and we fell on the floor. He was on top of me, trying to pin my arms down.

"Blaine! Stop it! Let go of me!"

"Why can't you give me a chance? Don't I deserve a chance? How could you want him over me?"

I started crying. I couldn't believe this was happening.

"Please Blaine! Please! Let me go!"

He was screaming. "Why don't you want me? Why does everybody leave me?"

He pinned my arms down and was staring at me. His eyes were wild and full of anguish. I screamed.

"Please Blaine! Don't rape me! Please!"

Something in his eyes broke.

He suddenly looked sad and confused.

He stood up and moved away from me, pressing himself against the wall. He looked dazed, as if he couldn't understand what was happening. I scrambled across the floor from him and stood up but I didn't leave. I stood there watching him. He slid down the wall to the floor. He looked at me and spoke very quietly.

"I would never rape you Kurt. I would never rape anybody. Never. I'm sorry."

He curled his knees up to his chest and put his head down.

"I'm sorry Kurt. Go home. Go home to David. Don't worry. I'll destroy the pictures. I won't tell anyone. Just go home."

I took one last look at him and ran.

XXXXXX

I was sobbing and driving too fast. Despite the fact that I was in my car, speeding to David's house, I couldn't calm down. In fact, I was sobbing and struggling to breathe. And I was feeling scared. So scared. When I reached David's house, there was no room to park in his driveway so I just pulled on to the lawn. I jumped out and ran to the door. When David opened it, I fell into his arms sobbing.

"Kurt! Kurt! Honey, what's wrong? What happened?"

I was crying and trying to breathe and talk at the same time.

"Oh, David! I... was so... scared. I-I thought he was going... to hurt me but he didn't and..."

"What? Who was going to hurt you? What? Kurt! What the hell is going on!"

"I know I should have told you but... I didn't want you to find out. I was... going to get the pictures back...I wasn't going to let him out you. I'm sorry! I should have told you..."

David held me tight against him and shushed me.

"It's okay Kurt. It's okay. You're safe now and I love you and everything is going to be just fine. Don't worry Kurt. I love you. I'll always protect you. It's okay."

I held on to him tightly, sobbing into his chest, my eyes squeezed shut. He held me and then...

"Ahem."

I opened my eyes and turned around.

There was a reason why there was no room in David's driveway.

Standing there was David's parents, grandparents, a girl I recognized from school and several other people.

Oh no.

They had seen everything.

They had heard everything.

I looked at David.

He had the calmest look on his face. He looked at me and pulled me closer to him. He then turned to the group of people standing there in shock.

"Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, everyone...this is my boyfriend, Kurt Hummel."