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Chapter 21 - A word to the wise isn't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice...

EDWARD

Construction on Swan Estates was moving along smoothly. Emmett was helping shoulder the weight of the work, coordinating it all. I wanted to get as much done before July as possible. I'd be starting my residency then, and I wouldn't have time to oversee anything. I didn't have much time as it was, but I'd have a lot less in the coming months.

Tom let Emmett know that there were a few guys in the group who worked construction, so we asked that they be hired to work on the homes they'd eventually be living in. There was a huge amount of excitement going into it all. Talk of the estates dominated at lunchtime. Plans for a community garden were made. A barn was designed and was in the works.

I had wells dug for the community to avoid water bills, and I was going to have purification systems installed in each house. There were septic tanks put in to keep them off the grid. It all came down to electricity, and I had done what I could to find ways to save on that as well.

Bella, the little genius she was, saw that I was looking over ways to start my own energy company, just to negate any problems they would have, when she told me about an ingenious little prototype.

The Bloom Box™ from Bloom Energy®

A few of these little, very expensive boxes could power the whole community if they were energy savvy. I spoke with the company president and let him know I was building an energy efficient community and would like to buy his product and try it out. The use of it in charity work such as we were doing would give them ample free press and proof that it could be used to power an efficient U.S. home easily. We were thrilled when they agreed, and we were able to take the homes off the actual grid.

Joe was one of the guys I checked out at lunch. My dad confirmed that most of his hearing loss was due to a bad double ear infection. He did some swabs of Joe's ears to be sure to use the right antibiotic on him, and I was supposed to bring Joe by after my last class, when my father would have the test results back. Joe seemed nervous, as we drove up into the medical plaza. "Is everything alright?" I practically shouted.

He looked at me with a soft frown and nodded yes, but he continued to fidget. When we pulled up to the building, he finally spoke.

"Hospitals make me nervous," he said warily.

I nodded in understanding. He wouldn't be the first one to have had a bad experience in a hospital. Many people had to leave behind loved ones, never to see them alive again. It wasn't something a lot of them wanted to relive.

I pointed to a bench outside the doors. "Why don't you wait outside?" I shouted at him.

He nodded okay, heading for the bench, while I headed inside. I found my dad in his office.

"I brought Joe in," I shouted. My dad raised an eyebrow at me with a smirk. "Sorry, I was talking with Joe," I said in my normal voice.

"That's fine, Son. What room is he in?"

"He's waiting on the bench outside. The hospital makes him nervous."

"He needs to be observed for at least thirty minutes after the shot, Son. He needs to come in, so the nurses can keep an eye on him."

"I can sit with him," I offered. "We'll be on the bench right outside the door if he needs help."

My father let out a disappointed sigh, but he followed me outside to where Joe was waiting. I stood next to them, blocking the view of Joe's hip, as my dad gave him the shot.

Joe thanked my dad, the sincerity clear in his eyes.

My dad came out at the end of the thirty minutes to let us know Joe was free to go. Joe thanked us both, before he told me he was fine just walking back to the park on his own. I let him go reluctantly; standing with my father and watching Joe cross the parking lot.

"You know, Edward, I'm so hard on you, because I want you to be the best. As a doctor, you will fail at times. It's inevitable. There's nothing you can do about it. People will die on your watch. I just hope that, if you study hard enough, if you're the best, then you won't second guess yourself and wonder if there was something you should've done differently. You'll lose patients, Son, and I just want you to be confident enough in your abilities that you won't second guess your decisions. There's nothing more dispiriting than self-doubt. Attachment to patients will exacerbate that. Keep your distance."

I was letting what my father said settle in my head, when he spoke again. "Hey, isn't that Bella?" he asked, pointing across the street.

Sure enough, I watched Bella and Alice walk into the building across from the hospital. My dad cleared his throat.

"Edward, is there something you want to tell me?"

I looked at him confused. He nodded toward the building, and I realized Bella and Alice had just walked into Planned Parenthood.

I struggled to catch my breath. What if we really had done something on the plane, and now she was pregnant? It wasn't as if either of us had been in our right minds enough to use protection that night, and I didn't know when her birth control was effective. Did I mention that I was never drinking again?

"Oh, crap," I gasped.

"Edward?" my father called to me sternly. "You wouldn't be so completely stupid as to have unprotected sex, would you?" I cleared my throat, choking a little on my tongue, trying to find some sanity.

"Well, she'll just have to get an abortion. There's just no way…" my father started.

"What? No! If she's pregnant, she'll have the baby, and I'm helping her!"

"You don't know what you're talking about. Emmett was born during my first year of residency. It was a nightmare. You know how much I love your mother, but we almost divorced. You won't survive the pressure of school and raising a child, Edward. It's just too much work for anyone to handle."

"She's not having an abortion!"

"It's not your choice! Thank heavens Bella seems like someone who can be reasoned with. I'm sure she won't want this to interrupt her schooling, either."

"No, don't you dare talk to her!"

"Edward…"

"I'll tell mom! You know she'll take my side. She wants grandkids!" I snapped, hitting him in the only weak spot my father had. It was low, but I was desperate. He stood there, glaring at me silently, and I took his silence as confirmation that he'd keep his mouth shut and stay away from Bella.

Oh, god. This couldn't be happening now…

I hopped in my car and took off, not knowing where I was going. I ended up at my brother's place, sitting in the driveway. He finally came out and pulled me out of the car. "What's up, man? You look like someone stole your puppy."

"Dad wants Bella to get an abortion," I blurted out.

It took a moment for my words to register.

"She's pregnant?"

"I don't know. We saw her walking into Planned Parenthood."

"Don't sweat it, dude. She could've gone there for a ton of reasons. It was probably just time to get a refill on her birth control. They do that there, you know."

His words were encouraging. She had told me she was on birth control, so it was very possible that was what she had been doing. I still didn't know when she'd started her birth control or if she had been on it at the time of our flight.

I didn't want to believe we had lost our virginity on the plane, but as things settled in my mind, it became clear that the first time she remembered might not have been the first time after all. She hadn't hurt at all the other night. Her hymen was obviously gone already. She'd said gymnastics might have done it, and I had been buying that story, until I watched her walk into Planned Parenthood.

"I think you need to talk to her, dude. Without solid info, you're just guessing, and jumping to conclusions, which will only drive you nuts. Be honest and ask questions. You know you're not going to feel better until you do." I didn't know when Emmett had become so brilliant. I think I was just now noticing it, because Bella had stood up for him at my parents' home.

He was right, of course, but how did I bring that up? "Hey, honey, I don't know for certain if we actually had sex on the plane or not, but I was just wondering if you might be pregnant?"

Yeah, not likely to end well, especially since she was sure we hadn't done anything on the plane.

I found myself standing outside of the club. I knew the girls were all sitting in there talking, most likely about someone being pregnant. I made my way inside, surprised the door was unlocked. They must have been really distracted to leave the door unlocked and unattended. I approached the back office and heard the girls talking.

"Maybe you can ask Edward if he knows how he feels about kids," Rose suggested.

"No, it's best to ask him outright," Alice said.

"I think he'll be a good dad," Bella said, as if she was trying to get up the courage to speak to me.

"Either way, it doesn't matter. I should get shopping for the little one. As stressful as it is, I'm really excited about the baby," Alice said.

I tried to stay upright in the hall, stunned by their conversation. I failed and thumped against the door. Rosalie jerked it open and stared at me, annoyed as I stumbled in.

"Hey, Bella," I said, trying to keep my voice from cracking and failing. She walked over, looking at me worried. I was such a jerk for freaking out on her, but how often did a guy overhear that he was about to become a father? Freaking out was only the beginning!

"I'm sorry," I finally blurted out, as she pushed into my arms.

"For what?"

"For…for…for..."

"Edward," she said, holding my face in her hands, "What happened?" My face scrunched up. "Honey, what's wrong?" she asked.

"Edward, were you listening in?" Alice asked a little too nicely. I nodded my head yes. "So, what do you think?" Alice asked.

"I-I'll be there for her and for the baby, no matter what," I choked out weakly. Bella looked at me confused.

"Edward, who do you think is pregnant?" Bella asked, and I glanced down at her stomach. "I'm not pregnant!"

I let out the breath I was holding. "Oh, thank god," I whispered. She shoved me back against the door and stormed across the room.

"Hey, chill out, Bella. He said he'd be there for you if you were. That was pretty sweet. Give the guy a break," Alice tried to calm my avenging angel. I looked up at her furious face.

"Why would you think it was me? I told you I was on birth control. Do you think I have some plan to trap you?" she snapped at me.

"Emmett thought that we…on the plane…I didn't remember…you didn't remember…and then I saw you walking into Planned Parenthood with Alice." My eyes darted to Alice's tiny form, and for the first time, I saw her hand resting on her tummy. "Alice?" She smiled at me and nodded yes. "Oh…um, congratulations! Jasper will be thrilled," my words stumbled, since I was still a little shaken up.

"You think?" Alice asked hopefully.

"Yeah, he will. He's been talking about you nonstop since he met you, white picket fence and babies included. I think Emmett is ready to burn his ears off." I noticed that Rosalie looked away from me, when I said Emmett's name.

"Really?" Alice said with tears in her eyes.

I dusted myself off and hugged her. "Really, and if for some insane reason he gives you any trouble, you tell me. Emmett and I will set him straight for you, but I really don't think it'll come to that. He's crazy about you."

"Oh, thank you, Edward! I feel so much better about this now." Alice squeezed me tighter than I thought a little person could, and then she released me. She pointed sternly at Bella. "You're not allowed to be upset with him."

Bella rolled her eyes at her.

"No, Missy, even freaking out and not ready to have a baby, he was willing to do whatever it took to be there for you. Even if you're not pregnant, that means something, Bella. Besides, just because you're not pregnant now, doesn't mean you won't ever get pregnant, my dear."

My eyes widened in fear, and I suddenly thought that maybe sex was overrated, if it could cause such panic and upset like that. Birth control was not one hundred percent effective, and I wasn't ready to risk it. She didn't need my dad pressuring her, either.

"Bella and I aren't going to have sex anymore. I don't want kids. We shouldn't risk it," I announced to no one in particular. I just needed to clarify it to myself to know I was safe. I heard gasps all around me.

Bella's eyes widened, Alice gasped and Rosalie started to cry. Then, I realized I'd just told Bella I didn't want to have kids with her.

Crap.

She turned and stormed out of the office. I was about to chase after her, but Alice grabbed my arm. "It'd be best if you gave her some time to cool down."

I had just screwed up…big time.