Title: Probability
Author: gabs88
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Summary: In the alternate universe of Season Eight, how does the married and seemingly straight Callie Torres find herself in the chronically single Arizona Robbins bed? She's not gay. Right?
Rating: This is an M rating. Just saying.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes. The story is mine.
Note: Wow. Five months? Or more? If you´re sticking with this, you´re great. So sorry it takes so long, I have a lot of projects going on. As promised, this story is still plodding along-thank you so much for your views and ideas and pushes. It´s more appreciated than you know! You guys rock.
Chapter 21
Bang
The flurry of activity that normally surrounded the ER was there, as always. None of it distracted Arizona as her eyes zeroed in on the room to the left of her. Through the window, she could see a team of ER workers, including Yang, Hunt and the chirpy Kepner girl, surrounding a bed that Arizona just knew held her mother. Her sneakers tapped out a pattern on the linoleum floor as she stepped her way over to the room. Eyes wide, her fingers touched the glass as she took in the view.
It was mayhem.
Hunt was barking orders, yet looking to Yang for guidance. Kepner was bent over her mother´s chest and Arizona´s eyes went to the flashing monitor. Her mother´s sats were dangerously low. As if watching a TV show, Arizona blinked, barely registering as the oxygen sats rose slightly when Kepner gave a satisfied nod as the chest tube she was inserting slid home.
Fingers firm and sure, Hunt´s hand ran over her mother´s thigh, the appendage purple and mottle. Femur break for sure.
By the looks of her BP, it was hemorrhaging.
Finally, tongue running over dry lips, Arizona dragged her eyes to her mother´s face.
She had a breathing tube inserted. Not good. A nurse was monitoring her airway. Her face was covered with grazes.
The scene looked eerily like another time Arizona had stood and looked at her mother after an accident.
When she was a child, Arizona had loved hospitals. They helped people. They provided a respite. There were cool medical supplies to play with and, for a little while, she wasn´t at home with the oppressive silence and the glares and the anger and the smell of spirits.
Arizona´s breath was echoing in her ears and it sounded too fast.
Why had her mother been at the front of the airport with Nick and her father? Why were they here? Not once had they ever flown to visit her.
Not once.
And she was okay with that.
When she swallowed, her mouth was almost painfully dry. The handle under her fingers was cool and Arizona didn´t even realise she was pushing the door open until the cacophony of noise hit her ears and she was staring at the scene without a plane of glass to separate her from it.
Hunt glanced up at her.
"What you need, Robbins? We´re kinda busy here. This woman´s a mess.¨
Her fingers gripped the handle harder.
"Do you think she´ll be for the OR?¨
Yang gave a half laugh half snort as she bent over her chest, auscultating. "I´ll say. Ruptured spleen, broken femur, popped lung. This one´s a gold mine.¨ She stood up, as if debating. "´Cause of all the blood, maybe she´s a ruby mine?¨
"Back off Yang, I was here first. I´m on the pit tonight.¨
The look Yang threw Kepner could make Martha Stewart cry. "She´s cardio, and since Torres isn´t here, she´s mine.¨
"Cut it out, you two, we need all hands on.¨
Kepner gave Yang a triumphant look and was answered with an eye roll.
Hunt looked up again at Arizona as they all tucked wires into the bed, preparing to move up to the OR. He did a double take as he took in Arizona´s face. "Robbins?¨ She didn´t answer as she stared at her mother. A ruby mine. Her mother was currently the kind of case residents fought each other to be on.
That was kind of sick.
"Robbins?¨
She looked up and finally caught his eye. "Mm?¨
The bed rolled forward slightly, all hands in there on the edges to help guide it. All that blocked them was Arizona.
"You need something?¨
Finally, Arizona shook her head. "Let me know how it goes?¨
Yang chimed in, ¨She´s not paeds, what do you care?¨
Her eyes went to Yang´s and then down to her mother´s face, half obscured by medical junk and barely reconiseable.
"It´s my mother.¨
The silence was enough to make her wish she hadn´t said anything.
Silence was all Callie could hear.
Her eyes were heavy and as she blinked she couldn´t help but close them rapidly again as a piercing light hit them.
The silence was slowly being replaced by a buzzing.
She raised her arm to shield it over her eyes.
Or she thought she did.
Why wouldn´t her arm move?
Callie tried again and a burning lanced through her shoulder and hit her so hard she couldn´t breathe for a minute.
The buzzing in her ears was getting louder.
When she managed to open her eyes, the site of leaves and trees over her head made her even more confused.
The buzzing in her ears was more like a scream.
Grunting, Callie forced herself to sit up. Sharp breaths got her through the pain in her shoulder and she looked around herself, bewildered.
Why was the plane in pieces?
Why was Alex laying on the ground screaming?
A memory of turbulence hit her. Of the plane shaking uncontrollably. She remembered Webber´s surprised yelp as the plane actually dropped and Sloan´s nervous chuckle.
When the plane had nose-dived and torn apart and hit tree´s, she´d been clinging to his arm.
Where was he?
And where was her shoe?
Sitting in a waiting-room was eating at her.
Arizona had never really had to do it before.
As a kid, nurses had secreted her and her brother away to quiet rooms and corners, with things to distract them and to play with.
Her foot bounced nervously and if it was someone else doing it, it would drive her crazy. Her father sat across from her, straight and serious and Arizona felt a burning resentment rise up in her throat.
"What were you doing here?¨
"Not now, Arizona.¨
He didn´t even look at her.
"No, seriously, what were you doing here?¨
The look he turned on her took her back to being five years old and expected to be seen and not heard, a military child who should behave like a soldier.
"I said, not now young lady.¨
A flush made it´s way up her neck and across her cheeks. It was only Nick´s hand on her arm that made her bite back her retort.
Her teeth clenched painfully and Arizona stood.
"I´m going to find out if there´s news.¨
"If there´s news, they will tell us.¨
The look in her father´s eye and the tone in his voice told her to sit right back down.
For once, she didn´t bow to his wishes.
"I work her, sir. I know the surgeons operating on Mom.¨
She turned and walked away, not really hunting for anyone but needing to be away from him. Normally her mother served as a buffer and not having her there made a lot of things very clear to Arizona: such as the fact as her father and her didn´t really have a relationship.
Her stomach turned over at the thought of what would happen if her mother didn´t make it through this.
Footsteps rang out behind her and Arizona didn´t need to turn around to know it was Nick.
"Pheonix, hold up.¨
Anger bubbling under Arizona´s skin made her turn around rapidly.
"Why were you here, Nick?¨
He swallowed heavily.
Her voice was cold, the anger not making it raise. "Nick, why are you here. And why the hell are my parents here?¨
Dark eyes stared back at her and Arizona suddenly felt a punch in her gut at how keenly she wished it were Callie´s eyes staring at her, dark and full of empathy.
She needed Callie and that thought made her throat tight.
Nick opened his mouth.
"Robbins?¨
Whirling around, Arizona was face to face with Hunt as he pulled his surgical mask down.
"I´m sorry, we didn´t know she was you mother.¨
"How is she?¨
Hands on his hips, he tried for a reassuring look but for some reason he just looked constipated. A laugh almost fell from her lips and Arizona choked it down.
"She´s stable. We´ve just finished up. We removed her spleen and one of her lungs collapsed. She lost a lot of blood through the fracture and internal bleeding. It was touch and go-she´s going to be out most of the night.¨
A breath she didn´t know she had been holding blew out slowly. Relief tingled at her fingertips. The staccato of her heart slowed down and she heard Nick murmur a, "Thank God" behind her.
"Can I see her?¨
Confusion flashed over Hunt´s face. "Don´t you want to tell your Dad?¨
"Can you?¨
And Arizona brushed past him and towards the elevators that would take her up to the ICU. As he always had when Arizona walked away from her father, Nick followed behind her.
The elevator was oppressively quiet.
"How long ago did you hurt your leg rock climbing? Should you really still need a cane?¨
Nick shrugged next to her. "I feel it makes me look refined.¨
"You look old.¨
She tried for playful, her elbow digging him in the rib slightly. She rolled her eyes as he winced in exaggerated pain.
¨Nothing wrong with growing old, Scottsdale.¨
There was a look on his face that Arizona didn´t have the emotional ability in that moment to chase after. The doors opened and they made their way to her mother´s bed.
The relief that had been tingling at her fingertips coursed through her body and Arizona almost felt faint when she saw her mother, bruised and battered yet intact, laying on the bed. The monitors beeped next to her and Arizona swept her eyes over the numbers. Some low, some high, but nothing dangerously so. She was breathing on her own. Several drains were coming out of her body and she looked beaten blue, but her mother was there, alive.
"Her face looks like the last time I saw her in hospital.¨
Nick´s voice sounded in awe and Arizona wanted to slap him for bringing that up, even though she had thought the same just hours before.
"Don´t bring that up, Nick.¨
Arizona stepped forward and grabbed the chart, scanning everything. A nurse Arizona knew stepped in to the room to intercede, but disappeared when she saw who it was.
"Shouldn´t you leave that to her doctors?¨
Arizona´s back unintentionally stiffened as she stood taller when she heard her father´s voice.
She didn´t answer until she finally put the chart back when she finished with it.
"Do you have any questions, sir?¨
Silence was her answer.
The three stood for countless minutes, staring at the woman on the bed.
When someone spoke, Arizona wasn´t surprised at what he said.
"I´ll go to a hotel and be back in the morning.¨
"You´re not staying?¨
Arizona didn´t take her eyes off her mother, sure the disappointment she was feeling would shine through her eyes at her father.
"She´s asleep. There´s nothing I can do.¨
Except be there for your wife. But that´s not something he knew how to do.
Her father paused at the door as he turned to walk out. "We need to talk tomorrow, Arizona.¨
"Yes, sir.¨
Old habits die hard.
When he was gone, Arizona turned to Nick.
"I need to know why you´re here.¨
He gave a nod, and glanced at her mother, as much his as hers, and looked back at her.
"Bar?¨
Guilt gnawed at Arizona as she thought about going.
"A drink, then back here. Is there a bar close?¨
"Across the road.¨
"She´d understand us going for an hour.¨
Arizona hovered, torn between going and staying.
"I´m buying.¨
She gave a nod, and turned towards the exit, her oldest friend and only brother she had left hobbling behind her with his ridiculous cane.
Percy was dead.
Callie had never been close to that one. He had no skill in cardio and so she had no interest in him.
But he had been there since they had merged with Mercy West and she had worked with him and been hit on by him and watched him pine for the short haired one from afar.
He was young and smart and had people who loved him and he didn´t deserve to die, crushed under parts of a plane.
Pale and looking ready to pass out, Karev had a leg that was clearly shattered but luckily hadn´t broken the skin.
They all sat around a pathetic fire and shivered.
The night was closing in on them and the temperature had dropped hours ago.
The pilot, trapped in his seat, kept reassuring them that help would come.
It had been hours.
Hours and hours.
Mark whimpered next to her and she patted his shoulder clumsily.
The memory of pushing a hairspray tube into his chest was one that would never leave her. She was sure she would never forget the raspy sound of his breathing and the colour his skin was, either.
Surprising them all, Derek sat next to him, cradling a mangled hand and talking about how Mark had to get his head out of his ass because his son needed him at home.
Webber stared sullenly in to the fire.
Callie wanted to go home.
Her kids would be having baths and fighting sleep while claiming not to be tired. They would be warm and clean and smell like baby soap as they clung to Owen and asked for just one more story.
Marks breathing sounded even shallower.
There was a howling in the distance and it made every hair on Callie´s arm stand up.
Would they all have realised what had happened yet?
The ache in Callie´s shoulder increased and she adjust her position, moving the knotted shirt that acted as a sling with her good hand.
Callie stared at the pathetic glow of the fire and thought of Arizona.
Would she be worried?
Callie liked to think she would be worried.
Why had help not arrived yet?
Surely someone should have arrived by now. It had been hours.
Everyone was quiet now.
Blood loss and broken bones and the death of a colleague could silence the best.
Callie wanted her kids and she wanted Arizona.
The fire went out.
The bar was warm and welcoming and the first sip of wine rejuvenated Arizona in a way it probably shouldn't.
Her fingers trembled slightly around the glass and she berated herself for that.
Her mother was going to be fine.
Turning on her stool, she looked at Nick, and despite her utter confusion as to why he was here with her parents, she felt a lump betray her and well up in her throat.
"I missed you.¨
His eyes widened in surprise, then softened as he smiled at her. "Me too.¨
"It´s been too long. Where were you this time?¨
"Photographing in a remote village in a place you´ve never heard of.¨
He winked at her.
"Mean.¨
"You chose the career path, Pheonix.¨
She grinned. "I did.¨
"So, any ladies?¨
She cocked her head, watching him as he wriggled his eyebrows at her.
"Nick, why are you here?¨
The playful look slid of his features and he looked down at his beer, fingers picking at the label.
"And why are my parents here? You know I don´t like to see them.¨
"That was your Mom´s idea.¨
"Obviously.¨
Her father would never have come up with that. He did not believe in maintaining soft relationships. Since Tim had died, any attempt he had ever made had died with his son.
"I´m sick, Scottsdale.¨
Arizona felt a tingle that wasn´t relief jolt through her fingers. She just looked at him with her eyebrows raised.
"I have cancer.¨ He looked at her and gave her a grin that didn´t belong with that sentence. "And it´s spread. The docs say I only have a few months. I thought I´d come see if you could swing any miracles.¨
Arizona blinked at him. Her lips felt numb. A few months?
"How the hell did it progress that far?¨
Nick shifted uncomfortably. "They might have told me I needed to do something a few, ah-" his words were muffled as he took a sip of his drink.
"A few what?¨
"A few years ago.¨
"Years?!¨
Arizona wanted to hit him. She wanted to rage at him. To smash her glass against the table and scream.
He gave a shrug. "I thought they were exaggerating.¨
For a moment, Arizona just stared at him. Then, unexpectedly, she laughed.
"Is this a joke?¨
He stared at her. "No.¨
The laugh slowly died on her lips. "Oh.¨
Quietly, they drank.
Nick was sick.
Badly sick.
Her mother was in a coma after being hit by a car.
Her love life was in shambles.
Wait-her mother.
"Why are my parents here with you?¨
The sigh Nick heaved was dramatic. "My drunk father told your father who told your mother. I think-uh, I think she wanted to be here.¨
Arizona didn´t need him to finish that sentence.
Her mother had wanted to be here in the way she couldn't be there for her real son.
"They just wanted to come for the night. I think your mum pulled any leverage she had to get your Dad to come. She wanted to be here when you found out.¨
Arizona had no idea what to say to that. As sweet as it sounded, it didn´t sit right with her family. When her brother had died, they had made no such effort.
A feeling that felt like a kick struck her stomach keenly.
Her brother was dead.
Her mother was in a coma.
Nick had a cancer that was apparently only leaving him with months.
Nick. Her Nick. Without caring if it was strange, Arizona stared at him openly. Nick was the only person left in her life that actually felt like family. When Tim had died, he had flown hours and hours to her door to find her. They had spent months together, drinking their way through all the alcohol they could and making it through the funeral and the aftermath.
And apparently he was dying.
"Nick. Where´s the cancer?¨
"Wrapped around my heart, apparently?¨
Arizona laughed again.
Of course it was. Of course it was cardio.
He looked at her like she had lost it.
Her laugh didn´t even simmer down as the irony kicked her again.
"You´ll never guess, Nick.¨
"What?¨
"I was sleeping with the cardio God of the hospital until a week ago, and now she´s on a plane out of town.¨
A smile wormed it´s way on to his face.
"Were dating?¨
And suddenly, finally, it felt like they were back to how they had always been. They gossiped.
Arizona, without sparing the details that made her wince in shame at herself, told him the full story and she watched him grow more and more intrigued. She told him of the woman that had floored Arizona Robbins, and still had the same effect now.
And still, when his soft brown eyes stared at her she found herself wanting other soft, brown eyes to be looking back at her.
When she finished, he looked at her like he was trying to piece together parts of a puzzle. As they were several strong drinks in, Arizona found this irritating.
"What?¨
"I still don´t get why you broke it up.¨
"Jesus, Nick, not you too.¨
"No!¨ He gestured wildly and winced as he almost fell backwards off his barstool. "I mean, but-you wanted her. I´ve never heard Arizona Robbins hung up over a girl.¨
A shrug was her only answer.
"And she wanted you.¨
"Were you not listening? She has kids, Nick. Three of them.¨
"They aren´t your kids.¨ She rolled her eyes and he grabbed her arm. "Okay, fine, there are three kids. But what are wrong with kids?¨
Irritation took over Arizona. So many times defending her decisions finally culminated in her being done with the topic. "Nick Tanner, you know that I have never wanted kids. Tim and I swore we would never have kids. You of all people should get that.¨
Not looking at her, Nick raised his bottle to his lips and took a long sip. When he put it down, he still didn´t look at her, but stared at the label as if contemplating that what he was about to say was really the best thing.
"Tim wanted kids.¨
Arizona scoffed. "What would you know.¨
Even she heard the petulant mutter in her voice, but she didn´t care. What would Nick know? He knew more than anyone, but not more than her and Tim did as to why they would never want kids.
"I know more than you think, and I know this: Tim wanted kids.¨
Speaking of Tim left a taste of salt at the back of Arizona´s mouth. More than anything, she wanted to talk to her brother. And more than anything, she knew that to be a lie.
"No, he didn´t.¨
"Pheonix, I love you, and you´re damn smart. Smarter than Tim and I when we were kids, and much smarter than I am now. But you´re wrong about this.¨
Anger that wasn´t entirely fair was itching at her skin. "You think I didn´t know Tim?¨
"I think you didn´t know this part.¨ Nick rest a hand on her arm and it took everything in her not to throw it off. "He changed his mind. Before he went back for his last tour, he told me Jane and him were talking about kids, and that he wanted to do it.¨
Arizona´s mouth was dry. How? How could he make such a life altering decision and not tell her? They had both had the same childhood, the same ideals. They knew why they made the decision they did when they were still practically children themselves.
"How?¨
"Pheonix, he made that decision because he knew he wasn´t your dad. And he was worried that you still thought you were.¨
Arizona drank the rest of the night without speaking of that again, an ache to speak to her brother heavy on her tongue.
Arizona woke up with a headache, the still unconscious body of her mother in the hospital bed next to her, the memory that her second brother was dying and Hunt hovering over her with a panicked look in her eye.
Within a minute, she added the knowledge that Callie Torres´s plane had gone down in the mountains and never made it to Boise.
She threw up in the garbage can next to her mother´s bed.