Chapter 21

The last thing Daryl wanted to do was hand his weapons over, but Michonne assured him that all of their weapons were labeled according to house number, and that if anybody ever checked a weapon out, it was from their own stash or from the armory of weapons that they'd picked up on runs and belonged to no one.

Michonne had conceded to let Daryl keep his crossbow, because, frankly, the thing was too damned complicated, and it wasn't likely that he'd leave it sitting around long enough for a child to pick up and figure out how to load and shoot.

When it came to doling out jobs, Michonne had contemplated giving him a supply runner position considering he had a pickup truck that could hold quite a bit of stuff, but instead, she made him a watchman. He'd be armed and keeping watch for six hours a day. He figured she probably gave him that job to make him feel a little better about where he was. Make him feel like he had a little control. He wasn't going to argue.

Given Carol's pregnancy, Michonne refused to give her a job that would lead her outside the walls or have her put in harm's way. Carol had protested, insisting that she didn't want any special treatment, but Michonne had still given her a job working with the children, at least until after the baby came. She felt a little bit put out by it, because she didn't honestly have much experience with children, but if helping educate the future of Alexandria was what it took for her to have a place in this society, she'd do it.

Their first official morning as Alexandrians, Michonne took them around the community, introducing them to just about everybody. Carol's mind was reeling at how many people there were and how many names there were to remember. There was Pete, the doctor and his wife Jessie, who had two boys named Ron and Sam. Daryl teased Carol about how little Sam seemed to have a crush, because he just kept smiling at her through the whole introduction.

There was Shane Walsh, the constable, and his girlfriend, Lori. Together, they were raising her son, Carl and her daughter, Judith. The sad thing was that Lori's husband had been shot before the turn, and in all of the chaos, he'd been left to die at the hospital. Shane, his partner, had taken Lori and the kids and gotten them to safety, and somehow, a romance had bloomed between them. Carol got it. They'd come together in grief and chaos, and somehow, it had turned into love. If it hadn't been for the turn, she'd never have met Daryl, and she was so thankful that even in the midst of such horror, she'd found something beautiful to hold onto, something to hope for, a reason to wake up every morning.

Shane, Lori and the kids had come to Alexandria about a month ago with a few other survivors. There was Dale, an older gentleman who was now in charge of locking up and checking out guns for people. There was Amy, a sweet girl with pretty blonde hair who seemed lost. Apparently her older sister had been part of their group and had been taken by walkers shortly before they arrived in Alexandria. There was Jacqui, a friendly lady who just happened to be a nurse. She worked closely with Pete, and Michonne noted that Jacqui was an OB nurse before the turn.

And then there was T-Dog. He was a friendly guy. The first time Carol met him, he gave her a wide smile and after a few minutes of chatting, they felt like fast friends.

Daryl was a little wary of people, but he stuck with Carol and took notice of those she seemed to respond to well and the ones that she seemed to steer clear of. Their meeting with Jessie's husband Pete, the doctor, had Carol bristling. He could feel her hand tightening around his. They hadn't talked about it yet, but something about him bothered her, and it worried him for her sake and for the baby's.

After the round of introduction, they'd gone back home, avoiding walking by Merle's house at all costs, because neither of them felt quite in the mood for whatever quips of smartassery Merle would have in store for them.

"What was it?" Daryl asked, as they settled down on the couch together. He pulled his arm around her, and she snuggled up against him on the couch.

"What was what?"

"Somethin' about Pete bothered you."

"You noticed?"

"Yeah, I noticed." He brushed his fingers through her hair. "You can tell me."

"I know." She sighed heavily. "Something about him reminds me of Ed. The way he looks at his wife. Jessie? Something about the way he speaks to her. It reminds me of how things were between me and Ed when we first got married. He seems like he's holding something in. Like he's on the edge." She shrugged. "Maybe it's stupid."

"Ain't stupid."

"I don't feel comfortable with him being my doctor. I know I don't really have a choice, but I don't…I can't."

"Hey," Daryl murmured, stroking her cheek. "I ain't gonna let anything happen to you, alright?" She nodded slowly, tears filling her eyes. "I'll talk to Jacqui."

"Daryl, we just got here. If we let them see we don't trust all of them yet, I…"

"He ain't touchin' you if you don't want him to. Hey, you're shakin'." And she was. Just the mere thought of being in the same room with a man that reminded her so much of Ed had her trembling. She hated that. She knew that she was weak in that moment, but she wasn't just afraid for herself. She was afraid for this baby. For the family that she and Daryl were building together.

"I wish I could just forget him," she whispered as he held her close. "As far away as I try to get from the memory of Ed, he's still here. I'm going to look at this baby every day and remember what Ed did to me, how he treated me." She shook her head. "I'm horrible, Daryl."

"You ain't. You're the strongest woman I've ever known. You fought for this baby. You survived. This baby might be a part of Ed, but it's also a part of you, and ain't nothin' wrong with you. This baby needs ya, Carol, and ya gotta believe that."

A knock came to the door, and Daryl sighed heavily.

"You gonna be ok?"

"Yeah," she whispered softly. "I'm just going to go upstairs and lay down for a little bit. I'm not feeling so great." She placed her hand on her stomach, and he put his hand over hers, a look of concern creasing his brow. "It's ok. Go on." He leaned in and kissed her softly, and she gave him a little smile before heading upstairs to lie down.

When Daryl reached the door, he could tell by the shape of the shadow against the curtains that it was Merle. He took a deep breath and opened the door.

"I know you don't want me 'round, but I came to ask a favor."

"What favor?" Daryl asked, narrowing his eyes at his brother.

"Eric's replacement for Aaron's got somethin' wrong with his appendix. Doc Pete's gotta cut his belly open 'fore he kicks, so they need somebody. Guess there's a group of straggler's a half a day away that're havin' trouble fendin' off a herd of walkers. Keep gettin' pushed further into the woods. They need some recruiters to bring 'em in if they're willin'."

"Why don't you do it?"

"Michonne don't want me out there again. Says I don't play well with others and last time was just a test run. Guess I failed." He snickered.

"I ain't a recruiter. I'm a watchman."

"Yeah, but she needs muscle. Somebody good with a gun. Guess that's you, baby brother."

"I ain't leavin' Carol. Not right now."

"It's just half a day's ride. You'll be back this time tomorrow."

"Maybe. Tell Michonne to find somebody else."

"One of the scouts said one of 'em's a doctor," Merle pointed out. Daryl swallowed hard. Of course one of them was a doctor. Of course, because now he was going to have to leave Carol so he could bring that doctor in so Carol wouldn't have to deal with having Pete care for her when she was clearly so uncomfortable around him.

With a frustrated grunt, Daryl knocked his knuckles against the door frame. He looked over his shoulders to where Carol was standing on the landing, watching him. Their eyes locked for a moment, before Carol gave him a little nod.

"Tell Michonne I'll think about it."

"Don't think long. Aaron's gearin' up to leave in a half hour." Daryl promptly shut the door in Merle's face and turned to lean against it.

"I ain't leavin' you."

"I'll be ok," she promised him, coming back down the steps.

"Don't wanna leave you alone in this place. Just got here."

"I can lock the door. I think I'll be ok."

"Don't trust it. Don't trust them. Not all of 'em." Carol nodded a little and put her hands on his shoulders.

"Just go. Help those people and come back. I'll be here. I promise." She gave him a gentle smile before standing on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "Besides, do you know how long it's been since I've been home alone? Like…had an entire house to myself?"

"Oh, now you're just tryin' to get rid of me, huh?" he teased, a grin curling at his lips despite the worry curling around in his belly.

"I love you," she said softly, not a bit of uncertainty about it. He swallowed hard, his heart pounding as he let the words sink in.

"I love you too," he murmured, leaning in to kiss her once more. She sighed softly, a feeling of relief washing over her as she heard him say it for the first time.

"Good," she grinned. "Just hurry back. I'm not going anywhere. I promise."