Author's Note:

As much as I might wish otherwise, the characters are not mine. I just like to visit Stars Hollow from Time to time.

I hope people are still reading and enjoying this story. I am trying to update as often as possible.

I do appreciate feedback, if for no other reason than so that I know I should keep going.

Chapter Eighteen – New Year 2012

New York City – New Year's Eve/ New Year's Day – 12:04 AM

Rory held the phone to her ear and used her other hand to block out the sound of the cover band playing Old Lang Syne.

"Yeah, I'm having a blast," Rory said, smiling at Jess who was standing next to her at the bar. "I'm glad I let Jess drag me out."

"When are you going to admit I'm always right," Jess asked her with a smirk, earning him a half-hearted glare.

"What," Rory said into the phone, "no, that was Jess gloating." Rory listed intently to her mom on the other side of the line. "I don't know. I might just crash with Jess," she said with a question in her voice, looking at her friend for confirmation. She smiled when she saw Jess nod. "Yeah, I'll crash at his place. But I'll be at your house by ten tomorrow so we can be to Grandma's for New Year's Day by one," she went on. After listening for another moment, she looked at Jess and said "Mom and Luke want to know if you're coming to my Grandparents house tomorrow."

"I don't know yet," Jess said. "I'm waiting to see if I get a better offer."

"He'll be there," Rory said into the phone, while trying to balance her drink and swat at Jess. The combination, and the fact that she lacked grace of movement in general, caused her to come close to tipping off her stool.

"That's not what I said," Jess said, grabbing her arm to keep her from falling.

"I don't care, you're coming," Rory said to him with a laugh.

"You're not the boss of me," Jess answered with a grin.

"I am most certainly the boss of you, and as such I command you to get me another drink," she said, putting her glass down on the bar.

"Yes mistress," Jess said sarcastically, waiving the bartender down and ordering another round of drinks.

"What?" Rory yelled into the phone, seeming to have forgotten her mother on the other end of the line. "Oh, yeah, I love you too, Mom. Tell Luke I love him and tell Babette and whoever else is there I said Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year, Lorelei," Jess yelled into the phone, earning a scowl from Rory.

"Okay. See you tomorrow, or later today I guess," Rory said.

Rory listened for another moment and hung up as Jess handed her another drink.

"Seriously, Jess. Thanks for taking me out tonight," Rory said, lightly clinking her glass against his.

"No big deal," Jess answered smiling.

The plan for the two of them to come to the small west village bar had been last minute. After the drama at Thanksgiving, Rory had finally broken down and asked Logan directly about his behavior, about the random (or not so random) dinners and about his intentions.

They had met for dinner in Hartford and Rory had used all her skills as an interviewer to get to the truth she wanted. Finally, it had come down to what exactly he had meant by wanting redemption.

"I don't know, Ace," Logan had answered, and Rory could tell that was the truth.

It had been a long dinner, and it had been awkward in parts, but by the end, Logan had admitted that he didn't really have a plan. He came clean that the initial impulse to text her had been just that-and impulse, brought on by running into her dad that one time; and he told her that while he would always love her, it still stung that she had turned down his proposal and he had never really understood why she had.

"Are you trying to get me back? I mean do you want…" Rory had asked, letting the question linger.

"I don't know," Logan had answered. "I know I have never felt for another girl what I felt for you."

Rory hadn't known how to respond to that, so she had simply smiled and agreed that there hadn't been anyone else as significant in her life either.

Logan had also explained that the whole third-week of the month thing. Apparently, it had been his attempt at being dependable. When Rory had pressed him on his reasoning he had admitted that he knew how important both tradition and dependability were to Rory, and so he was trying to establish both.

After the dinner, they had begun talking more, and had even seen each other with a bit more frequency, though it still had yet to progress past friendship. For her part, Rory wasn't entirely sure she wanted him back, but she knew she wanted the option, so as New Year's Eve had drawn closer, she had held off on making plans with the vague hope they might spend the holiday together. Unfortunately, Logan, it turned out, was spending the holiday at a ski-resort, leaving Rory with no other plans than joining her mother and Luke at Babette's.

She had been on the phone with Jess earlier in the day, when she had given in to his suggestion that rather than ring in the New Year Stars Hollow style, she actually act her age and join him at the bar for drinking and a mediocre cover band.

"So," she said, taking a sip from her drink and looking at Jess, "what are your resolutions?"

"Don't have any," Jess said.

"Of course you do. Everyone makes New Year's resolutions," Rory said, smiling.

"Ok then, what are yours?"

"Nope," Rory said, jabbing him in the chest, "I asked you first,"

"And I told you I don't have any," Jess said.

"Okay, resolution number one," she said loudly, "more drinking."

"Careful there Rory," Jess said, "we both know you're a light-weight"

"Am not," Rory said with a laugh. "You'd be surprised what being a DC reporter will do to your tolerance."

"If you say so," said Jess, "Just don't expect me to hold your hair for you when you're puking."

"Seriously, I'm not drunk," Rory said, looking at him levelly.

He considered her for a moment before smiling. "Yeah, I know. In fact I don't think I've ever seen you drunk."

"I've been drunk a few times. To tell the truth, I never liked the feeling much," Rory said, taking another sip.

"I'm with you there," Jess said. "So, then resolution one about more drinking might be ill-advised."

"Probably," Rory agreed. "But it's New Year's Eve, so for tonight it's okay."

"Probably," Jess said, looking at her and smiling.

The two fell into a companionable silence before Rory suddenly looked up and swatted Jess on the arm.

"What was that for?" Jess asked.

"You really wouldn't hold my hair if I was sick," Rory said with a soft pout.

"You know I would," Jess answered, laughing,

"Thanks Jess," she said quietly, and leaned forward to kiss him softly.

"With the hitting and the kissing already," Jess said with mock outrage. "What was that for?"

"For being you. For being my best friend."

"You know, you're my best friend too," Jess said quietly.

"I know," Rory answered, dipping her head so their foreheads touched. "Who'd have believed it?"

Jess laughed at this. "Happy New Year, Rory," he whispered.

"Yeah," Rory said, straightening up and looking away from him.

"What?" Jess asked, noticing her shift in mood.

"Nothing, believe me, girly crap, you don't want to hear it."

"If I didn't want to hear it I wouldn't have asked." Jess said, sipping from his drink.

"It's just…"

"Wait is this a Logan thing, because if it's a Logan thing, you're right, I probably don't want to hear it," Jess said. Rory had mostly kept Jess up to date on what was going on with Logan, including his role in her lack of New Year's Eve planning. As her mother had predicted, Jess was okay with it if it was what Rory wanted. However, he wasn't going to promote the idea, and deep down, he still didn't think Logan was good enough for his best friend.

"No, it's not a Logan thing, not really, at least not completely. It's a me thing. It's a kissing thing," Rory said.

"A kissing thing?" Jess asked. "I am going to need more than that."

"Do you know how long it's been since I have been good and kissed?" Rory asked.

"Shouldn't you be dressed like Liv Tyler when you ask me that?"

"Great movie, but that's not the point."

"Fine. When was the last time you were good and kissed?"

"I will tell you," Rory said. "Years! Years and years…. And years!"

"So, you're saying it's been a while," Jess asked with a smirk.

"Forget it," Rory said turning away from him and staring down at the bar.

"No wait, Rory I'm sorry," he said with sincerity. "Look, I didn't mean to make fun of you."

"Yeah you did," Rory said quietly.

"Okay, I did. But I shouldn't have. Now, what's going on?" Jess said.

"Nothing, never mind."

"No, it's clearly something. Honestly Rory, if it is a Logan thing I'm willing to listen."

"No, it's not really a Logan thing." Rory said. "Did you know I'm 27?"

"I was at your birthday, so yes I did," Jess replied.

"I'm 27."

"I'm 28," Jess countered. "Almost 29"

"Exactly," Rory said triumphantly.

"What?"

"When is the last time you had sex?"

"I don't know," Jess said, clearly embarrassed.

"Of course you know. Tell me," Rory said.

"No."

"Come on. I'll tell you if you tell me," Rory said.

"What makes you think I want to know when the last time you had sex was?"

"Fine, never mind. Forget about sex," Rory said.

"I'll try," Jess said. "Now you want to tell me what this is all about?"

"I'm…." Rory began.

"You're what? You're a pain in the ass is what you are," Jess said, trying to turn to their earlier banter and away from this sudden awkwardness.

"I am not," Rory said. "Well, maybe a little," she amended when she saw Jess raise an eyebrow in disbelief.

"I know, I know, it's a Gilmore thing."

"I'm charming," Rory rebutted.

"You're neurotic," Jess offered.

"I'm neurotically charming or what about charmingly neurotic?"

"Either and both," Jess agreed as he looked over at his friend.

She was right; she was both charming and neurotic. He smiled thinking about how far they had both come- her the town princess and him the rebel without a clue. He was glad they had somehow managed to rescue this friendship. He knew Lorelai and his Uncle suspected there might be more, but for right now Jess was content to have Rory in his life as a friend and confidant. They balanced each other out in some elemental way, and because of that, they generally had a lot of fun.

However, looking at her staring sadly into her drink, he knew she was stewing about something.

"Seriously Rory, what's going on? You can talk to me," he said softly.

"I'm lonely, okay?" Rory said, feeling the blush burn her face. "I'm lonely, and I'm 27 and I haven't had sex in almost three years because I can't do casual sex. It has to be about… I don't know… something, if not love then at least, I don't know, affection or something. But I haven't met anyone who I feel that for, who I trust, and even if I do meet someone, I go out on one or two dates and then nothing. Either they're not interested, or I'm not interested, or they only want casual. It's frustrating, and tiring and depressing and then there's Logan, and I swear to God Jess, I don't know if I actually want him or if it's that I know him well enough to go to bed with him and not feel like crap about it after! Only I probably would feel like crap after because it's him and I wouldn't know what it meant and I would end up obsessing and miserable anyway."

"Rory…. I…." Jess scrubbed his face with his hand trying to figure out what the right thing to say would be.

"No. You know what, never mind. I shouldn't have laid all that on you. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry for telling me stuff," Jess said softly.

"I guess I just… I don't know Jess. I really don't know anymore. I don't know what I want or who I want or what I should be doing."

"You'll get there Rory. I know it might not seem like it, but you'll figure out what you want and what to do."

"Why don't you tell me," Rory said suddenly, jumping off her stool and standing in front of Jess.

"What?" Jess asked, unsure of what she wanted.

"Tell me what to do. Be my Luke."

"Be your what?"

"Yes, that is what I need. I need my very own Luke. Someone to tell me what to do."

"I have never gotten the sense that Luke tells your mom what to do."

"Sure he does. All the time."

"Does she listen?"

"No. Almost never. But that almost never stops him either. So how about it. I have decided that I should have my own Luke… well minus the flannel and the hat, but still… you get the idea…"

Rory was giggling now. She didn't know why the idea amused her so much, but she did know that the thought of having someone else make all her decisions seemed appealing in a temporary sort of way.

"I am not going to tell you what to do Rory." Jess said, looking away from her.

"Why not. You always were bossy. Tell me what to do. Be Luke. You can start easy. I had about seven cups of coffee today…"

"This conversation doesn't even make any sense. What the hell am I supposed to-"

"I'm serious," Rory interrupted him, gripping his face with her hands and turning him to look at her. "Tell me what to do."

"Stop it," Jess said, pulling his face away from her hands.

"What? Why? I have said for years that everyone should have a Luke Danes. So I have elected you to be mine."

"No!"

"Why not?" Rory asked.

It had started as a joke, but there was something underneath now, something that was making Jess either angry or uncomfortable, and while she knew she should drop it and move on, she didn't seem to be able to.

"Stop it Rory," Jess said quietly, once again looking away from her.

"Why? I don't see what the big deal is. I mean honestly Jess; you have been telling me what to do since the day we met. I would think you would welcome the chance to –"

"Because I'm not your friggen Luke!" Jess yelled.

"Jess?" Rory asked, quieted by his outburst.

"I mean give me a break. This isn't who we are. We aren't them. I'm not your damn Luke. I am not your fallback position."

"I wasn't saying you were a fallback position," Rory said softly.

"What do you think; I've been sitting here waiting on the off chance that the magnificent Rory Gilmore was going to once again look my way? Typical. Just typical. I thought we were past this crap," Jess yelled.

"Why are you so angry? It was a joke," she said, unsure.

Jess watched as a single tear slid down Rory's face, and took a deep breath. He had no idea why he was so angry about this. But for as much as he loved Rory, she had always been so entitled, just expecting the world to hold her up and deliver whatever she wanted. And he had been one of those things for a while, waiting on her, begging her. But that had been long ago, in another life.

He heard her mumble something but couldn't make out what she had said.

"What did you say?" he asked gruffly, frustrated that a perfectly fun evening had taken on such a bizarre turn.

"Never mind. I'm sorry okay. I should probably go," Rory muttered.

"Rory stop…"

"What. I said I was sorry, what more do you want from me? I knew I shouldn't have come out tonight. I was already sad and disappointed and feeling crappy. I should have stayed home, eaten mallomars and watched Ryan Seacrest."

Jess tried to get a handle on his feelings. He took a deep breath and blew it out forcefully, trying to get past the last few minutes.

"Come on, we were having fun. Sit down and finish your drink."

Rory sat down sullenly and began staring into the depths of her drink.

Jess watched her quietly from the corner of his eye, trying to think of a way to rescue the evening when he heard her mutter something he couldn't make out.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"I said I know you're not my Luke. Don't you think I know that? Don't you think that I know you don't… that we don't… I know okay."

"Rory – "

"You're not my Luke and I'm not your Lorelai and I get that. I know that."

"Is that a bad thing- that we're not them? Would you want to be?" asked Jess, bumping her shoulder lightly.

"No, it's not a bad thing," she agreed bumping him back.

"I will tell you right now I do not have the skills to build you a tent," Jess said.

"A chuppah," Rory corrected automatically.

"Right. A chuppah."

"Yeah. I know. And I love us, as we are…" Rory continued.

"Me too. So we're good, right? No more crazy talk?"

"I can't promise no more crazy talk," Rory giggled starting to feel better.

"No more crazy Luke talk then, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," Rory agreed. She looked over at Jess, who was smiling, relieved to have the evening back on track, and without thinking, she stood up, turned to him and blurted "But maybe, just maybe, part of me wishes that you were… that we were…" Rory said, looking down at her hands.

"Rory?" Jess asked quietly.

"Jess… do you ever wonder, still, about us, about me? Do you ever think that maybe…"

"Why are we still talking about this" Jess muttered, still not looking at her, his smile gone.

"Do you ever wonder if maybe we missed out on some window or some… I don't know, some chance? That we blew it…"

"I don't know. Did we? Maybe this is what we are meant to be," he answered.

"Do you think if I kissed you right now, you'd let me…" Rory asked quietly.

"Rory…" he said, finally looking at her, her eyes still wet with tears, a small smile on her lips, and one moment was all it took.

Without thinking, Jess leaned forward on his stool to where she stood inches in front of him. In one movement, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled Rory flush to his body. He lowered his lips to hers slowly; pausing for a single breath to look her in the eye and make sure this was what she wanted. Seeing nothing in her face but desire, he kissed her, slowly at first, getting reacquainted with her mouth. However, as the kiss lingered, he felt her wind her hand through his hair, her fingernails scraping against the sensitive skin on the back of his neck, and while he knew this wasn't forever, he also knew that he wanted her. He splayed his hands across her hips, anchoring her to him as he gently tugged her bottom lip with his teeth.

For Rory, the moment was both surreal and comfortable, as if she was wandering through Wonderland, amazed and startled, yet completely at home.

She felt his fingers pushing into the soft flesh of her hips, his thumbs brushing the skin below the waistband of her jeans. She felt the strength of his arms, the insistent way he was holding her and realized that the last time they had touched he had been a boy, and that somehow in the intervening years, he had become a man.

She pressed herself into him, feeling wonton and free in a way that was completely out of character, and yet felt divine.

Jess felt her move against him and brought his hand up to her head. Tangling his fingers in her hair, he anchored her to him, trying to memorize every sense. She was soft and pliant against him, and just as she always had, she fit perfectly.

"Jess…" Rory whispered, bringing her hand up to his chest to push him slightly away.

"Rory, I…" Jess said, instantly dropping his hands and wondering if this had all been a catastrophic mistake.

"I want to leave," Rory said softly.

"Right, yeah," he muttered, kicking himself. "You want me to get you a cab? Or a hotel or…"

"I thought you said I could stay with you," Rory said, a soft smile on her lips.

"What?"

"Jess," Rory whispered, leaning into him once again and kissing his neck softly, "I want to leave with you. I want to stay with you. I want to be with you. I can probably say this in Greek if you prefer a more erudite seduction."

"Are you sure? I don't want to be something you obsess over that makes you miserable tomorrow."

"I'm sure Jess. I'm not saying this is…. That we're…. I just…."

"Yeah…." Jess said, tracing the lines of her face. She was his best friend and he loved her, he'd always loved her. And God knew she was beautiful. So while experience and instinct told him this was probably an epic mistake, he tossed some cash on the bar, took her by the hand and led her into the night.

The following morning, Rory woke to find Jess sitting in a chair next to the bed staring at her.

"Hey," she whispered, her throat rough from the night before, "What'cha doing?"

"Waiting," Jess answered simply.

"For what?"

"For the freak out to begin."

"What freak out?"

"The one you're about to have," Jess answered. "I know you, and I know your mind is right now whirring a thousand miles an hour trying to figure this all out, trying to analyze and justify and whatever else you do in that Gilmore brain of yours, so I'm just waiting for the freak out to begin."

"Okay, I'll tell you what," Rory answered, laying back and closing her eyes again, "right now the only thing freaking me out is you sitting there and staring at me and waiting for me to freak out."

"What?"

"What time is it Jess?" Rory asked, her eyes still closed.

"Almost seven," Jess answered.

"Perfect. Is there coffee?"

"No."

"Can there be coffee?"

"You don't want to talk about this?" Jess asked.

"Do you want to talk about this?" Rory asked him back, opening one eye to gauge his expression.

"I feel like we should."

"Tell you what. You go get coffee, I will go to the bathroom and put on clothes and then we can talk about this."

"Okay" Jess answered rising from the chair. "There's a deli on the corner. I can get coffee and rolls if you want."

"Perfect." Rory said her eyes closing once more.

She listened as Jess gathered his wallet and keys and left the apartment. As soon as she heard the lock click, she bolted out of the bed, grabbed her clothes and ran to the bathroom. Moments later, she emerged and scrambled to dig her phone out of her purse. Dialing frantically she heard her mother's voice come across the line.

"Shit, how are you not there," she muttered, realizing she had gotten Lorelai's voicemail. Hearing the beep, she began speaking.

"Mom, it's me. I have to talk to you… like talk to you talk to you. Me and Jess… and well we… and before you even start I was not drunk… I wish I were drunk. No I don't. I don't know… I did something… we did… well… something… I don't know, stupid? Maybe stupid, maybe not. Maybe just low-grade stupid, like I don't know… I can't even come up with an appropriate esoteric reference for the moment. Mom, you have to call me. I'm freaking out…"

"I knew it," came Jess's voice from the next room.

"Shit. Jess is back. I'm fine. I will see you later. Don't say anything to Luke about… well just don't say anything. Never mind. Gotta go," she said, and hung up her phone and slowly sunk back down to sit on the bed.

"Hi," she said quietly, looking up at Jess who was standing in the door to the room with a brown bag and two cups of coffee. "One of those for me?"

"Rory…"

"Please, okay, you win, I was freaking out. I was trying to do it gracefully and without your knowledge, but whatever. Can I at least have some coffee before the 'I told you so' dance begins?"

Jess walked over to her and sitting down gently beside her handed her a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," she muttered, not looking at him.

"Why didn't you want me to know you were freaking out?" he asked gently, a soft smile on his lips.

"I don't know. I feel like such a child. I bet you hook up all the time."

"Hook up?"

"You know… hook up… with people… with girls, women, sex…" she said. "See this is why I didn't want to talk to you. I sound like a moron."

"First of all, you're not a moron Rory."

"Yes I am."

"And second of all," he continued, talking past her, "I do not 'hook up' all the time. I don't like casual sex. Not anymore. And third of all…"

"There's a third of all?" Rory asked softly.

"Third of all," Jess repeated, "I'm freaking out a little too."

"You are?"

"Of course I am," he exclaimed.

"I don't believe you."

"Why shouldn't I be freaking out?"

"Because you're you. Mr. Cool man Jess. Mr. I have an answer for everything. You don't freak out about sex."

"I do when that sex was with you," he replied, standing up and beginning to pace. "I mean, this is… this is you, and this is me and… did it occur to you that we've never actually done this before?"

"It did actually," Rory said with a quiet giggle.

"Great, you're laughing at me,"

"No I'm not," Rory said, unable to mask her soft chuckle, "Okay, maybe a little."

"This is a whole lot of baggage and history and…"

"Jess," Rory said quietly, "Do you wish we hadn't…"

"No, Rory. Believe me, that's not it."

"Then what, cause I think you're actually more freaked out than I am," Rory said.

"I don't know. I guess I'm just curious what happens next."

"You mean besides hiding from my mother, who is going to have the world's largest 'I told you so' moment over this," Rory said.

"You're mother told you to sleep with me?"

"No. But she predicted that eventually I would," Rory said.

"I'm not sure how I feel about you and your mother discussing…" Jess began, when he all of a sudden stopped mid sentence and put his head in his hands. "Oh my God, Luke can't know. He'd kill me."

"I don't think Luke would kill you. I'm not sixteen."

"Trust me; Luke has not gotten that memo. He will kill me."

Rory looked up into his panicked face and not knowing what else to do, she burst out laughing.

"Okay, yes, Luke will probably kill you. And I can't guarantee he won't find out. In fact, given that my mother knew I was going home with you and given the message I just left her, there is a good chance he will know sometime soon."

"Just fabulous," Jess muttered, running a hand through his hair. "Why are you laughing? This is serious!"

"I know that Jess, but then again, everything with you and I has always been so serious. Maybe that's our problem. Too much overly eloquent angst."

"Are you still freaking out?" Jess asked, sitting beside her again.

"Not as much as I was."

"But…" Jess said, knowing she was weighing something back and forth.

"It's just, I don't know."

"Don't know what? Rory talk to me. Was it, I mean… do you regret it?"

"No. Honestly Jess, I don't regret it, I just don't know how I feel about it."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I don't know how I feel about this… it's a lot to take in, you know?"

"I know," Jess said softly.

"I don't know how I feel about us or about what happened or how I feel about it happening again, if it should happen again, if I want that. On the other hand, I don't know how I feel about it being a one-time thing. And if it was a one-time thing, how do I feel about having had a one night stand, and does it make a difference that said one night stand was with my best friend instead of a total stranger, and if it does make a difference, does that make it better or worse… and why…"

"Okay, stop," Jess yells with a chuckle. "I get it. Freak out back on track as scheduled.

"I don't want this to change us."

"Me either."

"And I don't know if I can be a booty call"

"You need to update your references Rory," Jess said smiling.

"You know what I mean."

"I know what you mean. And trust me; you are not booty call material." Jess said hoping to get her laughing again.

"So then it would be just this one time. Just chalk this one up and move on…"

"Is that-"Jess started, but Rory cut him off, lost in her own thoughts.

"I think if we never ever do it again we can write it off. But I also think if we keep doing it, it will become a thing and…"

"Rory, can I ask you something?" Jess asked suddenly, grabbing her hand to get her attention.

"Yeah?"

"Do you want it to be a thing? Want us to be a thing?"

"I don't know. I mean Logan-"

"Right," Jess said getting up swiftly.

"What?"

"Nothing, you're right. This was just one of those things."

"Jess?"

"We're fine. It's fine. I agree with you one-hundred percent."

"How can you agree with me when I don't even know what I said?"

"We're friends. It was a one-time thing. We can move on as if it never happened. No problem."

"Jess?"

"Listen Rory, I hate to do this to you, but I think I am going to bail on the whole New Year's Day at Emily's thing."

"But…" Rory said rising to stand next to him. "I thought you said we were okay?"

"We're okay Rory. We're always okay" he answered, not meeting her eye. "Best of friends as always. I'm just tired and don't really feel like facing the whole Hartford thing."

"But you're sure that… I don't know… that we're…"

"Yeah. I'm sure. If I can say one thing with certainty it's that nothing has changed."

For the first time, Rory felt herself exhale.

"Oh thank God. I mean I know it was all my fault, my idea, my… whatever. But as always, you're the best."

"That's me," Jess said sardonically.

"Okay. Well I will let you off the hook for Emily's this time."

"Thanks."

"But I should probably head out. I love you," she said carelessly, kissing him on the cheek and getting up to collect her things.

"Yeah." Jess said quietly. Something in his tone of voice caught Rory and she turned to study him.

He was clearly trying to brush the whole thing off, but Rory realized he looked angry and sad. She took a moment to replay their conversation in her head and realized she hadn't asked him how he felt or what he wanted.

"Jess… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to… I don't know… lead you on or whatever…"

"What?" Jess said.

"I don't know you just look upset. And I realized I didn't ask you what you wanted. I just figured neither of us want this… right?"

"Neither of us want…" Jess repeated, letting the sentence trail off.

"You know," she answered, "this, us. As you said, you're not my Luke."

"No, I'm not," Jess said.

"So, see. It makes sense."

"Great." Jess said turning his back on her.

"What's wrong Jess? Why do you seem pissed all of a sudden?"

"Don't worry about it," he muttered.

"Why won't you talk to me? Is this because I said that I didn't… that we shouldn't… cause I mean, if you want to…" Rory stumbled.

"Don't do me any favors," Jess said, ripping the sheets off his bed, knowing he wanted them cleaned, or more to the point, gone.

"Jess?"

"Look. You made it clear what you wanted. You wanted a night. You wanted to get laid," he said harshly, "and who better to service that need than good old Jess."

"I didn't… Jess… That is not…"

"Come on Rory, admit it. You wanted to get some and we all know the perfect Rory Gilmore doesn't pick up strangers in bars. So best of both worlds for you this way. You get to scratch that itch, go slumming a little, with no real risk."

"What are you saying?"

"I am saying, Princess, that you got what you wanted. Nothing has changed. Nothing ever changes, least of all you."

"I thought you said we were okay,"

"Right as rain," he said with a sneer.

"Why are you so angry all of a sudden? I mean you were the one making sure I understood that it meant nothing…"

"When did I ever…" Jess yelled.

"Oh give me a break. How many times did you tell me that you're not my… that we don't… that you don't… and then to be mad at me that I'm not sitting here begging…"

"I never said you meant nothing. But what do you care anyway. At least now you can go find your precious Logan…"

"What the hell does Logan have to do with any of this?"

"Forget it," Jess said angrily.

"I just, I don't understand. I thought you said we were okay?" Rory said, staring at him.

"Yeah, well, I lied," Jess said bitterly.

"Go to hell," Rory said, grabbing her coat and storming out.

"Been there done that" Jess answered the empty apartment. "Been there, done that."