Don't own the characters.
Basically, I sat down to update Chosen Two... but this story is burning in my head so
On we go!
-ASYD-
Adam spent as long as possible ignoring his phone, his watch chiming midnight before he climbed up to hunt through his clothes pile for the thing buzzing with messages. Ingrid's perfumed scent was still on his t-shirt and Adam felt a fresh wave of tears stinging behind his eyes. Pulling out his phone, he prioritised what he thought he could deal with. Robin had texted him twice, to ask if he was ok and then in confusion as he saw Erin, and Erin was confused by his disappearance too. Typing out an apology, Adam pulled on a clean t-shirt and cargo shorts. The picture of his father went into one pocket, his phone in the other as he climbed out his window. Looking up at the castle, he couldn't see lights on so he hoped the party was over and nobody would be out at this hour while he walked. Robin tapped his window gently, grabbing Adam's attention. He shook his head, no doubt obviously tear-stained even in the moonlight to Robin's eyes. "Bad dream?" Adam nodded before turning and running off. "Want me to help?" Adam knew what Robin was offering, and part of him craved the pain, the burn that made everything else go away for a moment. But he wasn't going to drag Robin down with him, so he pointed out Robin had a girlfriend now and Adam wasn't going to come between that.
The cold air bit into his exposed skin as he ran, stopping for breath and texting an apology to Erin. "I needed to get away, your name was the first that came into my head. Sorry." Ingrid's messages ran from "Where did you go?" to "Did you run into my dad and get killed this time?" and finally "Got what you wanted and left?". His chest ached with guilt at that, Ingrid wasn't the one who started this mess. Erin buzzed to ask if he was alright, and Adam found a hollow chuckle leaving his mouth as he told her he was going to sleep. Feeling the tear tracks on his face turn cold, Adam scrubbed over his eyes again. Faint smudges of eyeliner he hadn't got off in the shower marred the back of his hand and Adam rubbed it angrily against his t-shirt. Looking around where he'd ended up running to, the thin clothes he was wearing leaving him shivering as well as shaking with sobs, Adam recognised the park. Memories of the day with Erin, the first time they'd spoken properly and became friends while watching George and Chloe play. It was also the first time he'd seen Ingrid, sat under a tree in the shade and he could still remember being struck by her beauty then. And now, she was as related to him as George was and he felt like pitching himself into the cold river just to make everything numb for a while.
Fingering the picture in his pocket, Adam tried to master his nerve. "Do you remember the first time we saw each other?" Ingrid didn't answer his message, but Adam had lost himself staring at the moon for a while and practically leapt out of his skin when a hand touched his shoulder. Bracing himself, Adam turned to see Ingrid. Her eyes were full of anger and confusion, but he could see the hurt around the edges. He wanted to hold her, to kiss away the sadness so much it ached and Adam hated himself for it. "What in the name of sanity is wrong with you?" Normally he'd push his luck, make a comment like "I didn't know you cared" and Ingrid would be rougher with him for it later and he'd love it. Now he was obviously a mess, tears and eyeliner smudged across his eyes and shivering and shaking. Trying to meet her eyes, the blue and silver burning in the moonlight, Adam felt his chest ache again. Unable to deal with the feelings still stirred when he looked at Ingrid, Adam dropped his eyes and handed her the drawing.
"What is this?" "Open it." His voice was hollow, but quivered as his body shook. Ingrid opened it, looking at him strangely. "You drew a picture of my dad?" Feeling the pain in his soul now, Adam shook his head. "My mum drew a picture of my father. I ran into him after... you left the room earlier." Ingrid didn't speak, looking at the white paper shining in the moonlight, the unspoken words screaming between them. Feeling his knees go weak from exhaustion, emotion and cold, Adam sank to the floor and felt himself start crying again. She handed him the paper back and Adam stuffed it into his pocket, uncaring that it would be creased after he'd cared for it for so long. He didn't need it, he could go meet the man himself if he wanted now it seemed. Ingrid grasped his wrist, pulling him to sit on a bench and Adam followed mechanically, tears still streaming. She sat next to him and Adam couldn't find the energy to fight when she pulled him close, her own body shaking with suppressed sobs as he cried on her shoulder.
When he started to calm down, feeling all cried out, he dragged himself away from Ingrid and it physically hurt to lose her body against his. "What are we going to do? We can't exactly take it back." "I have no idea. What are the odds of something like this happening and us moving to the same backwater town? Wait. When's your birthday?" "I'll be fifteen at the end of June." Adam was mildly confused when Ingrid hissed angrily. "I thought you knew how old I was." "Oh. I do. I just realised that means I was less than six months old when he was off... making you." Neither of them could bring themselves to say the word father now, like it would be admitting they had to give up the connection they now knew was every kind of wrong. Adam stood up, the spot under the tree calling to him now. "Where are you going?" "To the tree. I'm struggling to sit where I sat watching George play the first time I saw you." Ingrid followed him, still looking confused but she let him sit down beneath the tree and pull her into his lap to clutch her tightly.
"This isn't helping matters, you know that right?" The lump in his throat was back at Ingrid's words, barely pushing his own words out to answer. "I don't think anything will." "What is it kids here say? Google it." Adam found a chuckle falling from him in surprise then. "Right, I'm sure google is designed for I'm in love with a girl I just found out is probably my sister." "You what?" Ingrid turned on his lap then, kneeling next to his legs and facing him. "I love you. I tried to pretend I wasn't falling for you, but I think we're past the point of lying now." Ingrid's eyelashes were damp on his own tear-stained cheeks as they kissed, the ache in his chest soothed and the guilt muted as he lost himself in the feel of her. She said what they were both thinking as they broke apart for air, murmuring "we shouldn't" against his lips before she kissed him again. The second her mouth was on his again, Adam forgot to care and let her climb back onto his lap, the all-too-familiar feeling of their bodies pressed tightly together stirring his body in ways he knew it shouldn't.
Ingrid's hips rocked against his, out of desire or habit Adam didn't know as he whimpered into her mouth. They broke apart again, panting heavily and Adam felt like his head was swimming. Ingrid's breath was warm against his chilled skin in the night air as she whispered "Do you want me to stop?", just like he had the first time. "No, but I should." Ingrid's face softened slightly, pale and beautiful in the moonlight and Adam felt his whole body pulse with the love he knew he shouldn't be feeling. "I know. But if I'd have known it was the last time before, it wouldn't have been in a rushed fuck in a store cupboard while half the school was nearby." Nodding, Adam closed the distance, kissing Ingrid softly and slipping his hands under her jumper on instinct. The gasp she echoed into his mouth filled him with desire, deepening the kiss and pushing her to lie on her back gently. Trembling hands pushed their clothes away, Ingrid's pale skin glowing in the night and the cold temperature didn't matter as they traced heated touches over each other, the fading bruise on her thigh a fitting symbol of what this was.
Their bodies slid together with ease, fitting the other in ways he should hate as Ingrid shook beneath him. Adam tried to draw it out, the knowledge this would never happen cutting deep inside as he moved his hips gently, trying to commit the feelings of being inside her, having her wrapped around him in every way to memory as Ingrid clung to his shoulders, whimpering desperately with every thrust. He was caught off guard when Ingrid came, quaking with pleasure and the words "I love you too" falling from her lips, pushing Adam over the edge with an intensity bordering on painful as he surrendered to it all. The air was colder on their sweaty skin as they dressed shakily, not even making a token effort to resist when Ingrid kissed him again. Ingrid's head buried in the crook of his neck, clinging to him for a moment against the tree. He felt her lips brush over his pulse point, having no doubt she could feel it race as she did so.
His next sound was one of surprise, Ingrid latching on hard, biting and sucking at his neck until his legs shook. It was a new feeling, having always been careful with any bed-partner to limit marks to where his clothes would cover. As Ingrid let go, Adam looked at her with what he expected were widened eyes. "I've been dying to do that for months, I won't get another chance now will I?" Unsure how to answer that, Adam nodded and brushed his lips over hers again. "I hate this. I'm hoping I'll wake up and the Valentines disco was all a terrible dream." "All?" Ingrid quirked an eyebrow at him. "Don't, this is hard enough as it is. Come on, I'll walk you back to the castle." Mostly, he wanted one last chance to feel her hand in his. Their fingers laced together tightly, both forcing themselves to look ahead instead of at each other as they walked up the sloping roads to Stokely Castle. They stopped at the gates, both knowing if Adam crossed them he wouldn't leave again. It wasn't the last time they'd see each other, but Adam knew he and Ingrid would have to learn how to be normal and not... this, so he used the last chance to memorise her face with no barriers between them, cupping her cheek as he kissed her goodbye.
"Sounds strange after everything, but see you at school?" Ingrid turned back, nodding stiffly and heading up the castle driveway. Feeling the aching compulsion the castle often gave him, coupled with watching Ingrid walk away with his heart, Adam barely realised just how cold he was now until he was trying to convince stiff limbs to climb back up to his bedroom window. Barely avoiding crashing to the floor as he managed to curl up beneath his bedcovers, Adam cried. His bed didn't help, memories of Ingrid laying next to him encouraged by the scent of her perfume on the clothes he was still wearing. He eventually fell asleep, his dreams constantly showing the face of Ingrid's father in the hallway, and his mum and George turning away from him, saying they knew what he'd done and he was not their family now. Bolting upright and still feeling the chilled stiffness, Adam checked it was an acceptable time to go and shower. Crawling beneath the hot spray, he finally felt his body thaw but the cleansing water did nothing for the ache inside him. Drying off after, Adam looked at himself in the mirror to see if the inner turmoil was written across his face.
The bruise on his neck quashed his hopes everything had been a terrible nightmare, tracing over it gently and feeling the sting of Ingrid's nails in his sides as he bent to pull on clean pyjamas. His collarbone was still purpling where Ingrid had bitten down on him before, stark on his pale skin as he pulled a hoodie on. The jumper didn't totally cover the mark on his neck, so Adam regretfully smudged concealer over it until it was sufficiently hidden. It felt like hiding part of himself, but then Adam was no stranger to that by now. Glad there was no school today, Adam headed to the kitchen and downed mug after mug of coffee until his hands shook and his throat burned. When his mum, Chloe and George came downstairs Adam felt a fresh wave of nausea at the sight of his little sister. It had been a lot easier to ignore the repercussions of their actions in the dark beneath the moon, but he was forcibly reminded of the fact Ingrid was just as much a blood relative as the innocent little girl in front of him now. He barely made it back upstairs to throw up, heaving and flushing away what was mostly just coffee now. "Are you alright son?" His mums face hovered anxiously behind him in the mirror as Adam brushed his teeth.
"Think I overdid it on the junk food last night." Adam couldn't bring himself to look his mother in the eye, shuddering inwardly in revulsion at his own reflection. "Why don't you get back into bed and I'll bring you up a cup of tea?" Feeling the shaking in his limbs Adam nodded, crawling back into his too-big bed and expecting he looked sufficiently pathetic when his mum appeared with tea. She smoothed back his sweaty fringe, kissing his temple and telling him to get some rest as he 'really didn't look well'. Downing the tea while it was still hot enough to burn his raw throat, Adam pulled out the barely-touched games console and vented his frustration out on pixellated characters until his shaking hands wouldn't let him. Tossing the controller down angrily, Adam rolled over to look at his phone still on charge - it had died while he was out with Ingrid. Game requests from George attacked him and Adam flicked them away quickly, not sure he could stomach seeing her name without twisting with nausea right now.
A few worried texts off Robin, who had seen Adam in his half way to a meltdown state last night. Adam reassured Robin he was home safely in bed, and not to worry but that he was spending the day resting after a rough night. He managed to fall asleep again for a while, the dreams gradually worsening until Adam woke up crying. Scrubbing at his teary eyes again, his fingers traced the bruise on his neck. His phone vibrated again then, and Adam wasn't sure if he hoped it was or wasn't Ingrid. Either way didn't matter, as it was Erin. "If you're still looking for a valentine, house is empty tonight." Adam hated himself as he asked what time, hating himself more as he was locking his door and texting his mum to say he was going to sleep so she wouldn't check on him in the night. Knowing he had his paper round in the morning, Adam cycled over to Erin's house the second he felt safe enough to leave his home that evening. Erin opened the door as he locked his bike up by the side of her house, taking in the look on his face and leading him to her bed. The pain and pleasure twisting inside him was routine now, his body reacting instinctually as he lost himself in the heat of Erin's body. Laying next to her after, still shaking and relishing the way his chest and back stung under new bruises and new scratches, Adam felt her stroke over his skin.
"What happened last night? Did she dump you?" Supposing that was as close to the truth as he could get without revealing the actual events, Adam nodded. "You could say that, though I think dumped implies a relationship." His throat still felt a little raw, no doubt exacerbated by the sounds of pain and pleasure Erin had drawn out of him. She handed him a water bottle, watching as he drank it down. "Thanks, I didn't realise how sore my throat was until now." He handed the bottle back, stretching out to feel the new aches before setting his alarm. "Is this the part where you tell me 'some of us have jobs' again when you sneak out in the early hours?" Adam nodded, emotional and physical exhaustion catching up on him as he let Erin pull him around her, her body heat soaking into his skin as he drifted off. He had to credit Erin, she never complained when he woke her up with his nightmares. Much like tonight, when he had to make a dash for her bathroom as he threw up again, though by now there was nothing but water in his stomach. Erin helped him stand, wiping down his sweaty face and handing him the toothbrush hidden away for him here. She gave him more water, waiting until he swallowed it down before pulling him back to bed. "Still a few hours before you have to leave, try and sleep again." Feeling her fingers trace over his arm where it was wrapped around her waist, Adam let her words lull him back to slumber.
-ASYD-
Surprisingly, this isn't as angsty/bad as things get muahahaha.