Hello Everyone. I figured that this story would not be complete unless I shared the letters Bella left for the Cullens. So here they are. Enjoy and once again thanks for the reviews.
A/N I received a PM asking if I have ever consider Suicide. To answer that question for all my fans......the answer is NO! Some days in life are hard and not pleasant but you have to suck it up and move on to the next day. I have found that it is odd that I can write death scenes well, I guess it is because I have been around death so much for my age. I consider myself to be a happy person and find that writing these stories to be fun. Maybe one day someone who is having a rough day can find hope in something that I write. Well I will stop rambling and let you all read the story.
As always S. Meyers owns Twilight
This chapter is not going to be in anyone point of view per say. It is going to be more like a family conversation.
Chapter 15: Bella's Good-byes
Emmett handed me my letter, I almost dreaded opening it, the fear of what she could say.
Dear Esme,
If you are reading this then it means that the puzzle box has survived the long years of weather it has had to endure until you returned to your home here in Forks. I am writing you in hopes that you will know what to do and honor my requests. I know that Carlisle is the head of the family but I also know that the heart of the family lies within the heart of the mother. That is you and you define the word in every possible way there is to define it. What to tell the women who has been so much of a mother to me then my own. All I can do is say Thank You, I know it is not much but it is all I have left to give. Thank you for the love and kindness you showed me. You welcomed me as if I had always been a member of the family, you even treated the same as your own children. Even though I was different it didn't matter to you. Thank you for letting me be a part your family, it was truly my honor. Thank you for encouraging Edward to follow his heart. In giving him that encouragement I was able to experience love in the purest form. For almost a year I was able to fly high on the clouds above because I had found a pure and true love. I felt happiness in the rarest of forms. I was able to enjoy the happiness that was brought to me by Edward. I will never forget the feeling of feeling complete. I'm so sorry for the pain that I caused you and your family. I really wish that I could take it back but then again I don't. You all were Family that I never had and I loved you all dearly. Please know that I really did love your son and I am sorry for the pain that I caused him. He was all the sunshine I needed on the cloudiest day. He was what my life was missing, he was my other half. We He left a part of my happiness went with him. Then my father died the rest of my happiness died as well.
I wish to say many things to you but I am not for sure where to start or even what to say. I miss you all so much and had hope to see you one day soon. However that can no longer be, I can no longer stay here in a world that holds no meaning to me anymore. I wish you and the rest of the Cullen family all the happiness you can find. Enclose is letters for the rest of the family, please give them their letters. I have also enclosed a letter for Edward, I know he doesn't really care but this would make me feel a little more at ease in asking you to do this. Please know that I am sorry for doing this and hope one day you can forgive me for giving up. I just don't have a choice any more. I love you all . Enclosed in the bottom of the box under the felt bottom is a hidden compartment. In it you will find a crystal figurine, one for each of you, I picked out the heart for you. There is enough love in your heart to share with the world. There are two birthstones hanging down from it. They are the birthstones of your human birth and your special birth. Once again Thank You for everything you have done for me.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan
Emmett handed me the box and had the bottom piece already removed. I saw all the pieces that she had picked out for each of us.
"Carlisle what do you think she meant about our special day?" I asked
"I think that she is talking about the day we became Vampires, I have heard her call it that before." He answered while opening his letter and began to read his letter aloud.
Dear Carlisle,
"My Favorite Doctor", To the one and only one I can give this title to. Thank you for being my on call doctor, you were there to patch me up every time I fell, broke something or had a cough. You have saved me on more than one occasion, I would be dead right now if you weren't there when James attacked me. You looked after me and cared for me not as one of your patients but as a daughter. Thank you. I love both you and Esme just like I do my own father. Please don't be disappointed in Jasper it was not his fault. I can't blame him for doing something that is only natural to him. Please take care of Edward he may not want me any more but I still care about him. Don't let him do anything to Jasper that he would regret. I worry about them both. I've always envied your family, the way everything fitted together. It was a well put together puzzle. The love you all held for one another was amazing. Even as couples the love you had for each other after all these years was truly special. I had hoped one day that Edward and I would have had the same kind of love you shared with Esme. The sparkle you had for her every time you looked into her eyes was truly enchanting. The love you shared was endless. You were like a second father to me and for that I am thankful. You still accepted me even though I was human. To say thank you is simply not enough. There are truly no words. I know you will take care of everyone because that is just who you are. I have chose a stethoscope for you, it is an instrument that you use often as the roll of the care giver. You play that role so well and you do it so willingly. You are truly a kind, caring and special person. I see where the rest of the family gets it from. I will never believe a person with a heart so big and so kind could ever be damned. I wish you the best in life and what it may bring your way.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan
Carlisle was still holding on to Esme as his own tears slid down his face. To know that he could have lost Bella only mad the situation grimmer. "Jasper since you are sitting next to me, would you mind going next." Carlisle asked
"Not at all" Jasper replied as he began to read his letter.
Dear Jasper,
I wonder where to start when it comes to you, so I will start in the beginning. My first day at school Jessica described you as "the one who looks like he's in pain all the time." You did have that look and I couldn't understand how someone could be in pain with someone so highper next to them. On one of my many walks with Edward before I meet you all at your house Edward told me about you. Just a little though, He told me to get you to tell me stories about the war or if I ever had to do a report that you would be the only thing I would need.
I hope you know I do not blame you for the incident that happened on my birthday. It is a natural reaction for your kind. With everyone else who was in the room and the emotion's that joined in, it was too much for any one to handle. Edward once told me that my blood would sing to him and that it took a lot of effort to control his urge to taste. I can only imagine what it must have been like for you. Not only do you have to live with your own urges but the feeling coming off of everyone else and live with this everyday. You called it control but I think it would have been something that I would considered torture. You really are a very strong person. I don't have to forgive you because there's nothing to be sorry about. You can't help it I'm a klutz, I've been this way for years. I hope Edward is not hard on you and that he doesn't do something he will regret.
I do have to say THANK YOU, Thank you for everything that you have done for me. You kept me safe, you made me laugh and I truly enjoyed it all. I also want to say thank you for keeping me safe and coming to my rescue when James attacked me. You stepped up and protected me so Edward could lead him away and keep my father safe. You thought of me enough to not only keep me safe but my father safe. I can never say thank you enough to you but to the rest of the family as well, there are truly no words. I chose a canon for you, Edward always said you war stories were better than the history books and you have a love for Civil War history. I really do wish I would have had the chance to hear they stories. I want you to know that Edward was proud to have you as a brother. It's just...well...He can't help but think with his mind first.
Please take care of Alice for me. She will need you more than you know, please keep her safe. Please make her smile, I'm sure she will not understand or be happy with the choice I have made. I just can't take it anymore. I wish you the best what life has to offer. Goodbye.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan
"After everything that I did to her, I wasn't friendly and I tried to stay away from her. I don't understand why she doesn't hate me, why she would think that it is her fault, why she would worry about me. She thanked me. I don't deserve to have a friend like her but am honored that she would consider me a friend." jasper said while holding his head in his hands. Alice got up and crawled into his lap and said "It's who she is, it's why we love her so much and why she fits into our family so well. I guess I'm next."
That she was, she slowly opened up her letter trying to keep the tears away and began to read.
Dearest Alice,
I'm not for sure what to say to you, I'm sure this is not how it was supposed to end. I'm so very sorry for the pain I caused you. I feel like I have put you in the most pain. I want you to know that you were my best friend, a true best friend. Finding someone who can fill those shoes is very hard to do. You were different, you were kind, you were special and you treated me the same way. You were a sister that I never had. Even though I protested every time you played Bella Barbie or tried to take me shopping I will never forget those moments. That's when you made someone plain into someone beautiful. You truly have a talent for fashion. I had a dream once that things were different and we were having a slumber party. We did all the normal things like paint our toes, talk about boys and have a pillow fight. Me, you and Rose fell asleep down stairs and our sweet, lovable men carried us upstairs to bed. We were normal and we were all happy but that was a dream. It was a blessing to get to know you and your family. I wish I could tell you so many things, I wish things would have been different. I wish a lot of things but wishing has not made anything better. I will miss you so very much, I miss the little pixie who could brighten up the room by just walking in the door.
I have to believe that Edward is the reason why you didn't say goodbye. I know deep down inside that you would never leave like that. Please look after Edward for me and make for sure he doesn't hurt Jasper. I do not blame Jasper for what happen and I think that you should know that. I know it will be hard but don't give up on Jasper, I know he will blame himself for everything but soon he will understand that things happen for a reason. There are a million things that I want to say to you and a million things I wish I could change but I can't. Please take care of yourself and everyone else. They'll need you and all the happiness you bring with you. For you I chose a Fairy, it is the closest thing I could find to a pixie. I picked the one with flowers because I know how you love having them around. I'll miss you and please take care of yourself. I wish you the best in what the future holds. Good-Bye my dear friend.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan.
Tears fell from Alice eyes as she sat in Jaspers lap crying "I told Edward this would kill her and look it almost did."
"Darling it will be okay, we are here now. Please stop crying." Jasper tried for an hour to calm Alice down but with no luck. Carlisle got up and went over to Alice.
"Let me try." He told Jasper as he picked Alice up and held her like any father would do. Slowly Alice calmed down and Rosalie pulled out her letter.
Dear Rosalie,
Although we never really got along, I hoped in time that we would become great friends. I know that you really didn't care to be around me and I know that you didn't like the fact that I was dating Edward. It was crazy to think that I would fit in. I hope you will forgive me for the pain that I have caused you and your family. I guess you were right, I really didn't belong in your world. I just didn't belong anywhere. I hope you find the happiness in what you are looking for and deserve. I don't know what happened to you or why someone would do anything to hurt you. However I know they didn't deserve you. I know that I asked Emmett to take care of you but we both know that you are stronger then he is, so please take care of him. We all know he would be lost without you. He really loves you. You are truly a beautiful person inside and out. When I was a child I would spend time with my grandparents every summer. She would tell me stories while we work in her garden. One day she told me the story of a rose, the story goes.
Once there was a rare red red rose. This rose a special rose. All the other flowers in the garden would envy the beauty the rose would give off. The rose envied them, she just wanted to be normal. Everyone always comment on her beauty and grace. Her petals were soft and her stem was full of thorns. In the morning sunlight she would glow as the dew droplet laid just right on her petals. One day she was picked and put on a counter. There she thought know one would ever think she was beautiful again. Much to her surprise she was wrong, she learned that she could be just as beautiful as she was in the garden. Even if she was plain.
My grandmother told me that story for years telling me that it is what we think of ourselves that makes us beautiful. You put up a cover because that is what people expect of you but on the inside you are just like me. Your kind, caring and gentle. I know the things you did were done in effort to protect you family and the secret they carry. I chose a rose for you, I chose it because a rose is a very beautiful flower. It's love is undying and unforgettable. If you ever need proof that you are a kind, caring or gentle person just look at Emmett or any member of you family. Hope life brings you everything that your heart desires.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan
Dear Emmett,
I have never meet anyone who was as tall and strong as you but so gentle. You look scary on the outside but on the inside you are the gentlest teddy bear. It was nice knowing that I had my own personal teddy bear. Between you and Jasper you guys were like the brothers I never had but always wanted. Emmy thanks for everything. I enjoyed our talks and the many laughs we had. Even though you knew how to make me blush every shade of red, I wouldn't change a thing about you. You will always be a big teddy bear in my eyes. I always knew that as long as I had you, Jazz and Edward that I would be safe. Thank you for keeping me safe. Please don't be mad at Jasper and Don't beat Edward up. Yes I remember what you said you would do if Edward ever hurt me. I think you said you would and I quote "I will tape him to a chair and make him listen to me sing It's a Small World." Please take care of everyone for me and please take care of Rose for me, she is a special person. She may hit you in the head often but it is only because she loves you and is trying to teach you some manners. There are so many things I wish I could say but I don't know where to start. I chose to give you a teddy bear, I wanted you to know that every little sister needs to have a teddy bear. A teddy bear will get you through the night if you have a bad dream. It will have tea party's with you and go to sleep overs. It will protect when your scared and make you smile when your sad. A Teddy Bear is something you will have with you your whole life because even when you grow up and become old and gray you will still need your teddy bear. Emmett you are that Teddy Bear, that is your role in the family. And I have to say you do your job well. Thank you again for everything and I wish you the best. Good bye big brother.
Sincerely
Isabella Marie Swan
"Now do you see why I was upset, We hurt her and she takes the blame. We were selfish to think the way we did. We need to fix this and make everything better. We know that Edward can't live without Bella and We know that Bella can't live with out him. We also know that as a family we can't live with out them. " Emmett said as a tear slide down his cheek.
Things were quite and everyone just sat there thinking about how things could have been. Thinking about how things were going to be in the future. As time passed slowly everyone left the living room, Rose went to the garage and started on Bella's truck again, Carlisle and Esme went to Edward's room to tend to him, Alice went in with Bella. I think she is reading one of her favorite books to her. While Jasper and Emmett plan out how to get revenge on the Lawson brothers. Things were going to be okay in time and time is what they had plenty of.
Well there they are. Remember Reviews are an amazing treat to have, so please review. I am having to add two chapters in the story. It may take me a few days to update. Hope everyone has a wonderful Weekend/