And here it is, the long awaited chapter...
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As the others continued talking about her former roommate's nightlife, she focused her attention on the sidewalks. She had no intention of finding the blue haired titan of course, but as the warm tingling in her body increased, she knew it would be inevitable.
The vehicle stopped, parking in front of yet another nightclub. Terra watched as the others headed inside, leaving her in front of the exit like the other times before. It was her job to watch the exits just in case her teammates missed her former roommate and as she felt the other energies inside the building she found that one stood out more than the others.
She was sure that her blue haired caretaker would be able to tell that the others were there and would teleport herself out of there if she wanted to escape them. Then again, she figured the older woman could be incapacitated either because she was inebriated or because there were just so many other auras inside the building that she may have a difficult time sensing the others presences. Maybe Raven simply didn't care about being caught there.
But if her first assessment of the probabilities were correct, that means that the her caretaker would be found by the others and taken back to Robin completely wasted, which would anger the boy wonder and he would bitch to Raven yet again. Or, the drunk girl would teleport herself out of there and end up in midair or something like that.
Terra frowned. Her caretaker wasn't careless like that so those scenarios were highly unlikely. Even still, her concern for the older woman compelled her to ascertain that the half demon was safe. She stepped away from the car as she was beckoned to enter the complex before her. Knowing that she wouldn't be allowed entrance because of her age, she headed down the alley, using her lightning speed and found an open window and used it to gain access inside the building.
Cutting through the mass of bodies while she made sure that the others did not see her was surprisingly easy. At the end of the bar, she found her objective tongue deep in another woman's throat in a very inappropriate embrace, letting her know that the other titans weren't embellishing her caretaker's night time activities.
She couldn't afford to be shy now, knowing the others were coming closer and stepped closer toward the guised titan, deciding that she would initiate contact since she could feel them closing in on their position, as she did, Raven and the woman broke apart.
"There you are." Terra said as she looked at her teammate, taking this as her cue to catch the older woman's attention.
"I thought you were going to bolt." Raven stated as she disentangled herself from her would be conquest and approached the teen. She had known that her former roommate was nearby for the teen's aura had stood out amongst the scads of others. The aura was covered with apprehension, a bit of confusion, but was overpowered with concern. Concern for whom or what, she didn't know. "I'm surprised they let you out by yourself." she remarked. There was no need to shout for their inhuman hearing enabled them to hear each other perfectly.
"The others are here too." Terra informed her, a bit confused by the situation. She was certain that because the older woman had known that she was there, she would know that the others were there as well. Maybe the older woman was just too drunk to notice and her range of aura sensing had dwindled down to a closer range.
"I thought so but I wasn't really sure." the blue haired titan revealed with a grin. "With so many others around, everyone feels the same." she cocked her head to the side. "Except you." the other girl's aura stood out so much that she had felt her coming when she was sure the teen was still on the other side of town. She supposed that this was due to the fact that they had spent an ample enough of time together that her mind had remembered how the young titan felt.
"Thanks?" the girl questioned, not knowing how to respond because she didn't know if this was a compliment or not.
"I never thought the others would send you in here to look for me." it confused her because she knew the others were dead set against the both of them spending any time together.
"I had to guard the exits." she mumbled and a brow rose in confusion.
"Then what are you doing in here?" inquired the blue haired woman. It was highly improbable that the girl had come into the club to take her in herself.
"I just wanted to tell you that they're here." the girl suddenly looked unsure. "I didn't know if you knew and after a little while of them being here and you not leaving, I thought maybe there were too many people in here so you couldn't tell." she explained. "So I figured I could warn you so you could make your little get away, that way they can't tell Robin that you were here and he won't hound you." she didn't want to mention her suspicions about whether or not the older woman was under the influence of a certain substance.
"How long have you been looking for me?" inquired the older woman with a smirk on her face, picturing the girl making her way through the sea of bodies on the dance floor looking for her.
"I didn't have to look, I already knew where you were." the girl revealed.
"How?" she asked skeptically.
"I can feel you Raven... well not just you… Everything… Everyone... It's like there's this thing that everyone gives off of and it's different for each person." explained the tiny blonde.
"You can feel me huh? Just how far do I have to be for your sense to tune me out?" her curiosity was peeked.
"Hey, all I know is you came back today but you haven't been anywhere near here in like 12 days." the petite teen stated.
"You mean I haven't been in the tower for 12 days."
"You haven't been in the country for the past 12 days."
The usually stoic woman couldn't believe it. Her patient pursued her, breaking from her guard duty, so that she could warn her that their other teammates were there? She would have pondered the blonde's reasons but then she remembered the girl's confessions about her sensory abilities. She was about to comment when she felt the others approaching closer.
"How about we get out of here?" Raven asked. She figured this was the least she could do since the girl had obviously gone through some trouble in order to find her before the others did and she did want to know the reason behind it. Also, she wanted to further explore the growth in the girl's senses. Besides, the blue haired titan had not had someone cover for her like this and she did want to have some fun. She was certain the blonde was more than up to the task of helping her.
"We?" the petite girl echoed the girl questioningly.
"We." repeated the blue haired female. The offer shocked the shorter titan. She hadn't expected that her caretaker would include her in her escape plans. "I've got a sudden craving for bacon." the older woman baited the girl further.
"Well, I am kind of hungry." the teen confessed. The taller female grinned, knowing that the girl wouldn't be able to resist an offer to eat. Since she was still healing, there was no doubt that she needed the food to replenish her strength. Placing a hand on the shorter girl's shoulder, she teleported herself and her younger teammate out of the club and less than five seconds later, they ended up outside a diner.
Judging from the trees that surrounded them and the fact that there was only one car parked outside and not even a single other vehicle was present on the highway, the blonde deduced that they were in the middle of nowhere. She really didn't mind for she had come to value privacy since she had woken from her stony slumber.
The pair headed inside the dinner and was met by the waitress who seated them quickly. They sat across each other as curiosity nagged them to start asking questions. The blue haired titan decided to break the inquiring silence around them.
"You're wondering when I started frequenting the bar scene." she pointed out, sensing the girl's curiosity.
"I didn't ask them anything. They were just talking about you." the teen assured Raven not wanting her to think that she was being nosy. "They were talking about you in the car and forgot I was there." she explained and the older woman didn't even ask what they had said about her for she had a feeling that the blonde would have tuned out everything else in order to protect her privacy. It was a rather touching sentiment.
"I know you wouldn't ask. You respect my privacy." she pointed out. The young girl was the only one who did. "You still want to know though." remarked the taller titan with a grin.
"I'm a growing girl, it's only natural that I want to know things." there was no need to lie about being curious. She didn't really think it mattered if the woman that sat across from her knew that she wanted to know because she still wasn't going to ask. Asking would not only provoke the woman, it would also make her out to be a prying ungrateful teenager.
Besides she would rather that the older titan told her about her life so she merely informed her that she was curious, hoping this would be interpreted as an invitation for Raven to tell her things in confidence.
"Yet you haven't asked me anything." she was pointing out the obvious.
"I could ask, but you probably wouldn't answer and as you so pointed out, I would hate to intrude on your privacy. Besides, there are other questions that I can ask that wouldn't be so intrusive."
"Or maybe the question why is something you'd rather ask."
"Well, you got a point. I think the why pretty much beats out when." she chuckled. "But I'd prefer if you just told me things instead of asking about them."
"Why is that?"
"Asking means I'd be prodding. You telling me things means you're confiding in me."
"But if I answered your questions, then that would mean that I'm confiding in you wouldn't it?" countered the older woman. In a way, she understood the younger girl's logic.
"Yeah, but then by me asking you things, that means I'm inviting myself into your life but it's like I'd be pushing my way inside. That's a pretty intense first move to make, its intrusive." explained the teen. "It's like if I asked and you answered you would do that just to shut me up. If I asked and then you didn't answer well that would just suck because then things would be awkward." she described the possible scenarios.
"I could be confiding in you because I know you care." the blue haired titan retaliated.
"Still, I kind of feel like if I asked and you answered knowing that I cared, you wouldn't answer because you want to. You'd feel sad for me and answer. Or because you feel I should be rewarded because I cared enough to ask you." Terra paused. " I want you to confide in me because you trust me. I want you to come to me because you want to." the teen whispered ever so low that if her older counterpart didn't have super hearing she wouldn't have been able to. "So I told you I'm curious and I'm going to leave it up to you to satiate my curiosity whenever you want to."
Raven smirked. The younger girl proved to be a master of words. She didn't know if it was the books that they'd read, or if Terra had always been this smart but never showed it before. Whatever it was, she liked seeing the clever side of the blonde. She also liked the fact that she was willing to take the more indirect and slow way in getting to know her caretaker.
That meant that the blonde was intent on respecting her privacy. The shorter girl didn't want to just ask her questions and get answers. She wanted to be told not only because she did not want to seem like a nosy teenager. It was mostly because she wanted to be told so she would know that the blue haired woman confided in her because it was her choice and not some whim or spur of the moment thing. It was a gesture that meant she wanted Raven to come to her in her own time, also that she wanted to gain the older woman's respect and trust.
As the blue haired titan finished rationalizing the situation, she smirked. This gesture of telling her things in confidence without having to ask questions was a better way to start their friendship off wasn't it?
Friendship? Her mind paused at the word. She mulled over it and its meaning. A month ago, she took care of the blonde and while she thought she was amusing to be around, she really didn't think much of her. Then, as she spent more time with her she became sympathetic to the younger girl's apparent troubles and now, now she was considering becoming friends again with the blonde before her? It seemed that the petite teen was getting to her.
Strangely enough, she didn't mind. The company was refreshing and not suffocating. She was so used to being confined with the others and now, with her patient she could relax. But her walls would not crumble so easily, no matter how much she relaxed around the company of the blonde.
"But then, how will I know what you want to know if you don't ask?" she couldn't help it. A part of her wished that Terra would crumble like the others did.
"There's nothing about you that I don't want to know Raven." the honesty that coated her tone did not go unnoticed.
"You're a really curious one then aren't you?" the blue haired titan teased, not wanting to betray her playful nature. She had to admit that because she could feel no malice or malcontent from the other girl, she was finding it hard to resist but her spiteful self reminded her that even though the girl had no intentions of hurting her, it didn't mean that she wouldn't. "You should be careful after all, curiosity killed the cat."
"I'm only this curious when it comes to you, Raven." admitted the blonde, refusing to back down after seeing the doubt and contempt in those ocean blue eyes. She could see the walls, forming and getting thicker and thicker by the moment.
"And why is that?" she asked, letting her own curiosity get to her. While she agreed about the blonde's ideas about asking people private things, she had decided that since it had something to do with her, she had every right to ask.
"Because I care about you." the proclamation slipped from her mouth rather easily. She blushed, hoping she hadn't stepped over some boundaries with her remark and she would have counted herself lucky that the older woman wasn't perturbed by the truth that she cared about her if not for the bitter look in her caretaker's ocean blue depths.
"Of course you would." her tone colder than normal. "When someone takes care of you, it's only natural that you begin to grow interested in their well being. It's the feeling of gratitude subconsciously making you so concerned." rationalized the older woman.
The blonde frowned. It wasn't like she expected a response that would convey to her that the blue haired woman also cared about her. In fact, she expected that the subject would have been dropped or that Raven would tease her or something. It was shocking to find out the woman before her was so bitter, so unwilling to trust, to confide in anyone. Whatever the woman had gone through, Terra knew it had to have been something excruciating, seeing as its effects still weighed down on her. But she wasn't about to feel sorry for the older female.
"Can't someone care just because they do? Or does there always have to be a reason behind it?" she bit back.
"There's always a reason as to why a person cares." the bitter woman did not let up. No one just cared about something or someone just because they could after all. There was always a reason, a subconscious one at times, but the reason was still present whether they knew it or not and her patient was not an exception to this fact. "Heroes save the world everyday because they care but they don't just care because they can. Some heroes for example, care for the people because they know that the less fortunate can't really take care of themselves. Other heroes feel that their good deeds will one day change the world into a better place. It's sort of like their pity and sense of justice possesses them to care about the well being of others." the older woman pointed out. "Some heroes are even kind of like villains because they are driven to care by their ambition. They care about the well being of the world because they want to be the one who will forever be known as its protector or its conqueror."
The blonde sat, watching the titan that sat across from her. She did have a point. Nobody just cared because they had the ability to and she certainly plenty of reasons why she cared for her caretaker. Even if someone were a good person, they cared because there was a driving force that compelled them to do so. Sure you could care about a random person, but one didn't just care because they did. They cared because they pitied the person or because they had been taught by society to lend a hand to those that needed it.
"I guess you're right." the teen conceded and the older woman would have smirked but the girl continued. "But gratitude isn't really the reason why I care for you." she informed the older woman.
"Then what is?" the blue haired woman allowed herself to ask, wondering Terra's reasons for caring about her could be. She was certain it was because of gratitude. Well she wasn't really certain this was just what she strongly wanted to believe. There was no other reason that she could think of that would provide the answer to why the blonde cared for her.
"Well, I care about you not because I have to or anything even if does come naturally to me, like breathing." her honesty was simply bracing. "I guess it's just that I admire you, respect you. I know it's not because you took care of me. I am grateful that you did but that's not the reason why I'm so concerned for you. But I guess, the only reason I can give you is that..." her face became serious as she stared into the windows of the older woman's soul. "I care about you because you can't care about yourself." the sadness in her tone was heard clearly by Raven.
She had picked up on the girl's choice of words. The teen had said 'can't' meaning she didn't have the ability to do so at the moment. Her brows furrowed as she tried to think of why Terra cared for her. She really didn't understand what reason the girl had to be so concerned for her.
"You care because you pity me then?" they shook their head at that. "No of course not if you did then you wouldn't respect me." she deducted and earned a nod of agreement in turn.
"There's nothing to pity." the blonde remarked. "But there's a lot to understand." their conversation was cut to an end when the waitress came and placed their orders on the table. They started to eat but Raven kept sneaking glances at her former roommate. The girl was becoming more and more of a conundrum. The silence that enveloped them wasn't really awkward. In fact, it was rather comfortable and it was funny to feel this way since they had just a not so comfortable conversation.
They both became trapped in their thoughts. Terra wondered if she had been a little bit too honest about things but her worries were drowned out by her amusement. It was quite funny that she found it so easy to be honest with the older woman so quickly. The older woman was becoming her confidante but she really wouldn't say she'd become dependent on her or anything.
Still, she and her caretaker were both coming to terms with the strangeness of the situation. The half demon pondered the unpredictability and foreignness that was occurring between her and her patient. Who would have thought that the closest thing she would have to a friend was a thirteen year old girl that betrayed them and fell into a stony coma for six years? The idea of it was diverting and refreshing.
After paying for their impromptu meal and exiting the diner the blue haired titan simply did not feel like returning to the tower just yet and as she sensed the teen's restlessness beside her, she knew the girl felt the same.
Without a word, the half demon placed her hand on the shorter girl's shoulder and teleported them out of wherever they were.
Light blue eyed their surroundings and she deduced that they were yet again in the middle of nowhere but this time, they were on an island. A secluded one at that but judging from the darkness that surrounded them and the fact that the moon stood in the sky, bright and full, meant it was night which also meant that they were still around the same time zone as the tower. But she knew they were still pretty far out, seeing as there were no other signs of civilization around.
She didn't ask where they were. Her mind was too busy dealing with the excitement of getting to spend time with her caretaker after she had left for two weeks.
"Didn't think you'd mind being away from the tower a bit longer." the blue haired titan stated.
"It's suffocating. I need the fresh air." responded the girl. She had been feeling a bit antsy and she had all this pent up energy but she didn't quite know what to do with it.
"So, think you can tell me more about this newfound ability of yours?" her tone was a bit gentle, letting the younger girl know that she didn't have to answer if she didn't want to. The half demon wanted to leave it up to the girl to tell her. The young teen had been more than decent enough to respect her privacy so she would do the same.
"Like I said, I just feel everything. This sort of heat that people, things, animals give off. It's not really heat... just this feeling. I know it's not the same as your ability to sense auras because I can't tell what people are feeling." she explained. The taller female nodded her head in understanding. Knowing that the girl was done with her explanation, she decided that it was time to reveal the reason why she had brought them to the island in the first place.
"I've never really been on this island before but I passed by here before and didn't sense anyone so I thought this place would be perfect." the older titan stated. The blonde turned her head toward her teammate but before she could ask what the purpose of being on the secluded island was, she saw a fist heading toward her face. She quickly stepped back, avoiding the blow.
"What the hell Raven?" she asked but only got a foot heading for her head in response.
She wanted to be angry but she couldn't. Not when she knew she needed this. Not when she could feel the adrenaline coursing through her petite form. She grinned excitedly. So her caretaker wanted to spar, well she would happily oblige.
Raven knew that their fight with the villains and their discussion about reasons behind people caring about others had them wired. The easy defeat of the villains left the adrenaline coursing through the blue haired titan's veins and she was sure Terra was feeling the quick fight's effects as well.
Their discussion added to the rush too so the older woman knew she would not be able to get any sleep and she was sure her former roommate felt the same. That's why she had decided to bring them to this island, where they were free. Free to fight however they wanted and to cause as much destruction as they wanted. They didn't have to worry about anything or anyone and focused on their sparring and the surge of emotions it brought with it.
The blonde blocked the fist that was aimed for her stomach and tried to send one of her own toward her sparring partner but found that she could not for a leg swept her off the ground and she landed flat on her back. She took the hand that was being offered to her and was pulled up from the sandy beach.
"You're still not quick enough." Raven stated. "But you'll get there." the younger girl dusted the sand off of herself and took her fighting stance yet again. They had been fighting for hours and she didn't think the teen had it in her to continue but the glimmer of excitement in those light blue depths informed her that the shorter girl, like herself, was far from tired. She found herself a bit enraptured that the blonde was just as enthusiastic about their sparring as she was.
Terra didn't smirk as she ran toward her momentary foe and sent a punch her way. She wasn't the least bit tired. The punch was blocked easily, which she knew it would. She knew she couldn't beat the older titan, but beating each other wasn't why they sparred and they both knew that. They loved the rush it brought and two weeks without sparring meant she had a lot of energy to spend.
They soon lost track of time and after a few more hours of sparring, they finally ceased. Terra was sprawled out into the sand whilst her older companion sat up, leaning on a rock beside her as she looked out into the horizon. The sun was rising.
"So, would you mind telling me more about how you can sense where my location?" the older woman asked.
"Like I said, I can feel you. I know it's not the same as sensing auras because I don't feel what you feel. I just feel you, everything. It's like I'm connected to everything or something." she explained. The older woman nodded her head in response and sensing that there would be no more questions about her sensory capabilities, she decided to keep the conversation going. "I love watching the sunrise." the blonde murmured as she relaxed, letting the sand beneath her and the sound of the ocean crashing against the shore calm her nerves. "But I can't decided which is prettier, the sun rising or it setting? I think I prefer sunset though." the girl rambled.
"Why is that?" she found herself asking. The shorter girl's relaxed state to be a bit contagious.
"Because when the sun sets, you know that night's coming and that's something I always looked forward to." she revealed to her caretaker who raised a brow in response. The blue haired titan had figured the girl to be a sun lover or something. "I know weird right? I seem like the sunshine loving type." she giggled lightly at the confused look on the taller woman's face. She knew what Raven had thought because others thought the same. Maybe it was because she was a blonde but then again, she knew her caretaker wasn't really one to judge a book by its cover. "But I love the night. I don't know if it's the dark or because I know there are less people out..."
"Nighttime makes seeking solace easier. Being surrounded in the dark, it's more peaceful." she understood the call, the allure, being a child of the night herself. The blonde nodded her head in agreement. "Thank you." the blue haired woman stated. The moment seemed right, everything was calm and they were alone. She thought it was only appropriate to display her own gratitude for everything that the blonde had done for her. The girl beside her looked at her in bewilderment. "For sparring with me."
"I should be thanking you for that Raven." the teen blushed slightly.
"Then thank you for warning me in the club." she knew the blonde couldn't counter her now. "It's good that even though you've changed, a few things remain constant." remarked the blue haired titan. "You've still got your bad girl streak and you haven't gotten rid of your more impish side." she teased and the blonde frowned a bit. "But you're not going to hear any complaints from me." the comment eased the blonde's nerves a bit. The teen pushed away her issues for the moment and focused on the now.
"You know, I was surprised you could still walk straight, let alone spar." Terra retorted. She could smell alcohol from the other woman before, letting her know that the older titan had done more than her fair share of drinking.
"Half demon, remember? Fast metabolism." Raven reminded her former roommate. "So that's why you went after me then, you weren't sure if I was drunk." she deducted and yet again the blue haired titan found herself touched that the girl cared so much about her. The blush that she saw appear from the pale cheeks let her know that her assumption was correct. "I know it's a bit of a shock to you." the monotone took hold of her voice.
"What is?" the blonde asked as she looked at her caretaker quizzically.
"The club scene, the sleeping around." she stated. It surprised her that she even brought it up. She didn't like talking about it but as it seemed, the girl was getting to her again. The way the teen acted, so comfortable and decompressed around her. It was infectious. "I'm a far cry from the girl you used to know."
"To be fair, we didn't really know each other that well." she pointed out. The half demon woman grinned a bit for she knew the comment was true. They didn't know each other well back then. "Besides, I'm sure you have your reasons... I mean, I'm not exactly in any place to judge you." the teen reasoned. She really didn't want to bring up her past but seeing as the blue haired titan so bitter told her she needed to remind the older woman that she too had walked down the dark path. "I know from experience that sometimes, you do what you think is best."
It occurred to the blue haired woman that the blonde beside her knew a lot about surrendering to the darkness within. It was another one of those similarities that they had.
"I do have my reasons... and they are rather pathetic." she laughed bitterly.
"I'm sure a certain red headed alien is one of those reasons." the teen voiced her musings aloud, causing the bitter chuckle to cease.
"I thought you said the others didn't tell you anything." her monotone was broken, letting out a bit of anger and shame. She thought that the younger girl had just tricked her and she felt a bit betrayed. The blonde slapped herself mentally. She was sure that she was just talking to herself, inside her head, where it was safe. She didn't know that she had just voiced her thoughts.
"They didn't." she reassured the older woman, trying to ease the older woman a bit. "I always knew you had a thing for her."
"No one else did." she knew the girl wasn't lying and was surprised that even back then, the girl had foreseen her attraction to Starfire.
"I guess they weren't as observant as I am then." Terra stated with a smug smile.
"Blackfire is the other reason." the words slipped out before she could catch herself. It seemed that the moment was making her a bit too relaxed and she decided not to say anymore than she already had. But as she watched the smug expression on the other girl's face vanish, a part of her thought that the confession was worth it. As she saw the childish puzzled look grace the teen's features, she figured that it was. She didn't think she had seen the girl look so confused before.
She smirked. There was nothing she could do now. She couldn't take back her confession and the girl didn't do anything to make her confess anything so she figured she couldn't hassle the teen over it. Besides, she hadn't revealed anything that she was sure the very observant girl wouldn't have found out herself.
Ocean blue eyes remained on the features of the girl beside her. She observed as the short teen processed her thoughts, slowly coming to grips with the discovery. It was certainly amusing, watching her think.
It wasn't that she didn't believe the girl had the ability to do so. It was just that the other girl was concentrating too hard. Concentrating on what she had just discovered that her former caretaker had been involved with the dark haired Tamaranean princess. She bet that the teen did not see that coming and of course. She too, had gone that path of disbelief herself when her former lover confessed her more than friendly emotions. Well, she had expected that the woman wanted her, but she never thought that she possessed deeper feelings than desire. She certainly did not expect that she would confess and beg her friend to let her love her.
Then again, the confession wasn't entirely true. Blackfire didn't love her. She may have thought she did, but the half demon believed that whatever it was the dark haired princess of Tamaran felt for her was not love. If she did love her, she wouldn't have crushed her heart after all.
The blonde continued to process her thoughts. It did explain the animosity between the dark haired princess of Tamaran, her pink haired girlfriend, and her former roommate. The only thing she really didn't know was whether or not her caretaker had gone out with one or both of the princesses but judging from the way her caretaker acted around the her pink haired teammate and the brunette, she came to the conclusion that the dark haired former villainess was probably the one that broke up with the taller woman.
She wasn't really sure about the situation with Starfire and Robin though because of how the boy wonder was always breathing down her caretaker's neck. Always too overcritical and judgmental about everything she did, like he was threatened or something.
After processing her thoughts, she looked deep into the depths that had been observing her for quite some time. She could see them glimmering with amusement but that was all that seeped through the cracks of the steel door that her caretaker had strengthened over the years. She really couldn't blame the older woman before her for improving her defenses, making them impenetrable. After all, she had her heart broken twice.
Raven had expected some sort of smart-alecky retort about how she seemed to fall for the princess type or something like that. She was thankful that there was none and it surprised her that she didn't find any pity in the girl's aura. In fact, the teen looked like she really was trying to sympathize and understand what her caretaker was going through.
"Like I said, we all have reasons why we give into our darker impulses." was the remark that Terra made. "There are worse things you could be doing."
"Like help a notorious villain take over the city." she didn't say it to be mean or spiteful for once. After sensing the teen's guilt, she knew that her shorter counterpart was thinking about her misdeeds once again. "I suppose we both know more than our fair share of the darkness within." the guilt had not settled and Raven froze as she felt something she hadn't, something she considered herself incapable of feeling: concern.
She was concerned for the blonde beside her. It wasn't overwhelming concern of anything. She could feel it still though, the bit of it. Since when the fuck did she feel concerned for the teen? She took care of her yes, but she did it more out of duty then concern. She hung around the blonde because the girl was fun to be with, entertaining and amusing. So when exactly did she start to actually be concerned with the girl's emotional well being? She couldn't really say.
Was this just another one of the side effects the petite girl was giving off? Could it be that the feelings of concern and caring were contagious, like the relaxed state of being she obtained around her? Because she knew the whole guilt thing apparently was because she now felt it. She felt remorseful for bringing up the past and was mentally kicking herself over the comment that further upset the girl. Was it because she no longer simply sympathized with the teen? Could it be that she had actually felt that her petite former roommate was truly her friend now?
The older woman could feel the annoyance and frustration rising as she felt her remorse eating at her. The feelings concern and guilt, though were slight and almost nonexistent, weren't very accommodating feelings and it had been forever since she had felt these things. She couldn't really say she knew what to do or how to deal with these atrocious emotions since she had never been skilled at it in the first place.
The half demon didn't understand it but somehow the girl had managed to get under her skin. Terra had somehow found a way to affect her in ways she thought were no longer possible. The girl allowed her to feel sympathy, then actually made her feel like reciprocating the act of friendship, and managed to get her to care. Perhaps she wasn't as emotionally detached as she thought she was. The notion made her stomach churn. She didn't know how deal with this, with the blonde and the way the girl was settling herself into the blue haired woman's world.
She opted to do what she always did. There really wasn't any other choice after all so she would do what she did best. Glancing at her side, her face contorted with absolute determination, telling herself that there was no other option and so the half demon knew what she had to do in order to ensure order in her mind, body, heart, and soul.
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Thecrazyrabbidfangirl- I understand your impatience but… eh I didn't want to say anything but I guess I should explain. When I read "Fallen from Grace" I sort of felt like Rei was settling and I didn't want that to be the case this time around. I want to show that Terra isn't the second best choice and that Raven isn't just somebody's leftovers. And thanks for the grammar heads up… I really should start editing better. I have to actually re-read versus skim read.
Fairfax- I apologize for the lack of physical development. I was hoping really to establish that emotional connection between the two characters and I really hoped that Raven wasn't going to come off as a "F**k my life" kind of girl as you put it. She's just been through a lot and she feels that she needs a new approach on life since the old "keep others at arms length" standby didn't work for her. She just wants to do what or whoever she wants. She wants freedom... the freedom to act on whatever she feels without fearing the consequence of what will happen. After spending her whole life keeping her self in check, she deserves it. I think I've failed in demonstrating this... could you, and anyone else for that matter, tell me what I should do to make this clear?
To all those that wish for Terra/Raven action, I'm sorry but you'll just have to wait. I really want them to have a strong foundation... They still have a lot to figure out, a lot of issues to resolve, as I HOPED you would understand... maybe I'm not as good a writer as I thought I was...
Thanks for all the support and praise by the way.