AN:/ Hi. Sorry this took so long. After camp, I was exhausted and passed out. Then my birthday came along and I got writer's block and then all these things happened . . . I'm really sorry.

One of the reasons it's so easy to write about Selena and her family life is because it kind of mirrors some of the relationships with my family members. Serena is based off of what I think my little cousin will become when she's older and, growing up without a father, I kind of have this very angry mentality about fathers who don't take care of their kids.

A few days ago, I was listening to this song about a dad who is about to leave his daughter behind but decides not to, and, after a long crying spree, I thought about Selena's relationship with her own father and the issues that she has with him that are even more unresolved than the ones I have with mine. This is the result. I may have a small arc after this where she deals with those issues her father has given her before intertwining with the Primary mechanisms story.

"Just drop it, Ironhide," Selena warned, glaring at the mirror. "I don't care about it, and you shouldn't either. Let this die."

"No, Selena," he argued, "I won't."

This was not one of their normal arguments, where they were merely throwing opinions over something stupid as they had been doing between the almost sickeningly fluffy cuddle sessions they'd been having, this was bigger.

When the Autobots had asked Lennox what the big deal about a human's second name was, he'd explained, patiently, that the last name was as much a part of the person as their first name was. It was a connection.

That had made Ironhide think. Neither Selena nor Serena had given the others their actual names, let lane their last names, and now he wanted to know. He wanted to know everything about Selena, especially something this important! This wasn't just something as small as her favorite color; this was her NAME for Primus sake!

"Why can't you just let it go?" Selena demanded angrily. "I'm done with that part of my life. I don't want any connections to it!"

"You cannot just ignore the beginning of your life, Selena," Ironhide warned, his age showing in the wisdom of his words. "You started there. You were created with that name. That part of you can never die without you dying as a whole. It can be buried, it can be ignored until you have passed on -" he didn't ignore the painfully splitting of his Spark at the mere THOUGHT of losing her "- but you cannot simply ignore it because you don't like it."

"Don't give me that crap Ironhide," Selena growled. "Now let me out."

Ah, they had reached this part of their argument, the part where she runs away from what is happening. That was something he had tried to get her to acknowledge, but never could. When she or Serena were in danger, she'd fight tooth and nail, and, once the danger was over, she'd flee.

It wasn't a bad strategy, except for now, when she was using it to run away from him.

He knew that this was just her way of dealing with them fighting over important things now that he was important to her. While she liked arguing with him verbally in jest, she hated arguing with him in all seriousness, just as it bothered him, but leaving that part of her unattended could ruin her inside, and that was the last thing he wanted. He was not going to sit around and it for another part of her life to come and try and take her from him. He'd be damned before he let that happen!

"Dammit Ironhide, "she growled when she noticed the doors had become locked, "Let me out!" She thoroughly punctuated her statement with a good kick to the door, sure, though, not to hit anything too sensitive. No matter how angry she was at him, she could never hurt him.

"No," he answered, putting a holoform next to her and pulling her into his arms, mostly to keep her from flailing about. "You need to talk about this, Selena. You need to let it out, or it will destroy you from the inside out."

Selena fought back a tear. God dammit, she would not cry. She had cried in front of him so much! She would not cry again! "I'm asking you, Ironhide, please." her voice was small and not nearly as strong as it should have been. "Please don't do this. I chose these names for Serena and I so we could have a connection to each other that didn't involve HIM." she sneered the word in a way that made it obvious to Ironhide that she was talking about her paternal unit, who she never spoke of. "That man did a lot of things I'm not proud of to me, Serena and to others, and, knowing him, he did even more after we left and is still doing it now - if he's not dead." she turned in his arms to look him in the eyes, her gaze travelling across his handsome face that had been marred unjustly by a scar over his eye. She momentarily reminded herself that she would need to find and kill the con responsible for such a horrendous act against nature, scarring a perfect face like that. "Despite everything that's happened, everything she's been through, Serena is still so pure, so untouched. Me, I've got blood on my hands - Don't argue with me," she warned, seeing him about to start that. "I know it was needed, but that doesn't make the stains go away. I've got blood on my hands, but they're the blood of those who deserve it and, since a certain 'bot talked to me," she nudged his shoulder with her forehead since he'd been holding her arms tightly to his body, "I've had no issue with my conscience, but that man . . . I won't let his taint spread to us. I won't let that connection poison the family we have made here. Admitting I had that name . . . it's like I'm inviting him to just show up and ruin everything like he always does. I can't let that happen Ironhide. If he takes you from me, if he takes any of you from me, I don't know-"

"Shhhh," he said, pulling her to his chest. "It's alright. I understand. You don't want it to take us away." Just like how he didn't want it to take her away. He could understand that. He could understand her wanting to keep it away from them. She didn't want to be tainted, just like he didn't want her tainted by the war anymore than she already had.

He . . . cared about her too much.

She didn't cry. She didn't want to ever cry in front of him again. She had been thinking more and more about it and had, in the end, decided to ignore her father's existence just as she had her whole life. Ironhide just had to get involved. She was frustrated, but she was willing to let it go.

Her father had done so much to her without doing one thing for her. Even before the cons had come, she was just so tired of everything he was doing. She was thinking about running away when those strange men had shown up at her door all those years ago. She could still remember the last thing that selfish bastard had ever said to her. "Just shut up and go, you stupid, little brat." She scrunched up her eyes and buried her face into Ironhide's chest, trying to dispel the choking sent of the beer she had smelled on his breath that day as she held her little sister in her arms.

She knew Ironhide was right. She would have to deal with the scars that her father's greed, ignorance, and neglect had left on her, but, for now, she could simply lay, quite happily, in his arms and just let him be there for her when she needed him the most.

She slept inside him that night, partly because she didn't want to sleep alone and partly because she knew that Ironhide was worried about her being angry at him. Honestly, the man used to get off on pissing her off, now he was always worried about hitting a wrong nerve. It was weird, but cute. It made Selena feel safe around him.

Ironhide refused to go into stasis while she was inside him. He never did. He always made sure to stay wide awake to make sure that she was always warm. She never complained about the weather, which WAS warmer than most places, but it was still nowhere near the level she was used to. Serena once told him that she once wrapped herself in three comforters just to get warm enough to go to sleep. Ever since, he had made sure to warm himself as hi as he could to make sure that she was always comfortable when she was around him.

That's what he wanted for her: to be comfortable around him. Those cons had really messed her up, as he had seen by her preference to be around him his alt mode instead of his holoform for anything. Even Tessa had enjoyed her time with Optimus's holoform. Selena had never shied away from him, but she had never initiated anything between the two of them. He didn't like thinking about what they had done to her to make her so afraid of human contact beyond Tessa or Serena.

He Spark shook angrily, demanding he hunt every one of them down and . . . he had to stop himself from going any further. Selena was in his arms, snuggled into his chest and, occasionally, nuzzling his neck in her sleep and saying his name. Now wasn't the time to think of all the violent things he could do. Now was the time to enjoy loving her as much as he could before the storm came.

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