A/N: Sorry for such the long wait ya'll, it's been a crazy week. I officially moved! Ironically to a place of Twilight significance. Brownie points if you guess it :) Anyways, kind of a short chapter. I haven't had much time to write. Warning that my updates will be on and off for the next several weeks. They may be regular and quick for some time and then go into waiting a bit at other times. Starting a new life in a new town is kind of stressful.

Oh also side note: I finally updated my youtube channel a little. I made a separate playlist for all the lyrics in the beginning of all the chapters. There are a couple repeats but different verses, and I realize I fucked up one chapter that didn't have any. But, yeah. I'm human.

We'll make our agreements

About when to meet

And I'll leave you in the doorway

The cold evening aches

As it leaves in its wake

All the memories left by the day

And I'm questioning why

As you look to the sky

That is cloudless up above our heads

And thoughts come to mind

That our short little lives

Haven't left the path that they will tread

They will tread

Chapter 21: Gone

Alice POV:

"Alice you said it wouldn't rain!"

"No, I said it should be clear. I never made a guarantee." Emmett rolled his eyes at my smartass comment.

"Some psychic you are. Come on Rosie, two hours until the party. I wonder what we could do with our free time." He was greeted with an immediate slap on the back of the head. "Ow!"

"Why must you always be so crass?" Rosalie shot me a sympathetic look after she was done scolding Emmett. For some reason everyone felt guilty about having normal love lives around Bella and I. I'm really starting to understand why Bella is so pissed at everyone.

"Alright kids, no messing with my decorations. Alice, why don't you go get Bella and you two can help finish setting out the poppers and sparklers."

"Sure thing Esme." I hopped out of the car as soon as Emmett parked it to go get my wife. "Bella! We're back early. It started to rain pretty hard." She wasn't in our room so I wandered over towards the bathroom, still no Bella. Something wasn't right. "Bella?" I went back to the bedroom and scanned the room with a little more attention than I did the first time. There was something there I hadn't noticed before. An envelope, and something glinting next to it in the light.

I let out a cry of pain as I got closer, the something was Bella's ring, the one I tried to replace. And if her ring was sitting atop this envelope, I had a pretty good idea of what its contents were.

I sunk to my knees holding it in my hands. If I didn't open it, maybe it wasn't true. Maybe it was an illusion or dream of some sort. But I also needed to open it. I needed to know why.

Alice,

I'm so sorry. I can't even begin to put into words how

sorry I am. I know you'll never forgive me, so I don't ask

for your forgiveness. I only hope to make you understand

my reasoning.

You are everything to me. Even after everything that has

happened in my life, you are always there for me, even when I

don't deserve it. I love you so much, and this is one of the

reasons for my departure. I can't ever feel free with you when

I know there are threats to your safety. As long as they are still

alive, the Volturi will always be a threat to us, our family.

However, in the interest of total honesty, my reasoning was not

all selfless. I can't move on with you completely when I know

they are out there, not paying for what they've done. When I

had my emotions turned off I once told you something, that I

enjoyed killing. That was partially true. I'm ashamed to admit it,

but there is a beast inside of me clawing at its cage. I can't stay

here contained any longer. It would tear us apart. This is me

keeping control of how that happens.

I promise to stay safe. Please don't go looking for me, you'll

only put yourself in danger. I need you to trust me, I know

it's a lot to ask after all that I've done, but I need it. I left my ring with you

incase you find this act unforgiveable, which I wouldn't blame

you if you did. But it also never has felt right on me. I will get the original,

you can count on that.

I wish you a happy new year, I didn't want to start it with you if I

had no intentions of finishing it with you.

I love you always,

Bella

I could count the number of times that I've wanted to cry real tears on one hand, this was one of those times. Terrible sobs racked my body, this was a pain I'd never felt before.

She left me. She actually left me.

Just like you left her. Abandoned and alone.

Apparently my absence had worried Esme because she came in later asking what the holdup was. She was sincerely sorry once she noticed something was horribly awry.

I was curled into a ball on the floor, crying my heart out, and clutching a letter and wedding band. Esme figured out the gist of it from this pretty picture and hushed me into her arms. Luckily she didn't make me talk or ask any questions about it, just let me sob continuously.

"Esme it's an hour before the party. What on Earth is taking you so-?" Rosalie stopped in the doorway at the sight of us. "Oh shit."

"I think it's best if we cancel the party Rosalie. Can you go and tell Carlisle?"

"No." I called to stop Rose as she went to leave. "No. Don't cancel the party. Not for me."

"Alice-"

"No Esme. You've worked so hard. You deserve to celebrate."

"But-"

"No buts Rose. I need some time alone anyways." Esme and Rosalie both looked at me with highly skeptical looks and I sighed, pushing my mother away gently. "Please. I'll be fine."

Eventually I coaxed them into leaving me be. Sometimes you just need a good cry by yourself, especially when your mate/wife leaves you.

Yes I know it wasn't because she didn't love me anymore, I had enough common sense in me to know that. And her letter made sure I knew it as well. No, that wasn't what hurt me so much about her sudden departure, it was the fact that my love wasn't enough to have her stay. That's probably one of the worst feelings in the world for a mate.

She was in pain, constantly battling with herself, I had noticed it a while back, but I never imagined her doing something like this. I had been selfish about not bringing it up with her, I worried about what I would hear. Maybe this was exactly what I deserved then.

"She really left." Liam had come in with an utterly shocked expression on his face. He stared, disbelieving at what he knew to be true. I only nodded and held up the letter for him to read. He's the only person I feel comfortable handing such sensitive things to, besides Bella of course.

Liam read it quietly, sinking down onto the floor with me the further he read.

"Fuck. Alice I'm so sorry."

"Me too."

He handed me back the letter and excused himself. I was sure he was in about the same amount of pain that I was. Bella left him as well. She was my wife, but his best friend, his sister. At least I got a letter.

Midnight came and went, and I continued to sit in my room wondering when everything went wrong. When did she decide to leave? Was it a spur of the moment thing or did she plan it? No. She planned this. That's why she kissed me like that before we left. I was even stupider than I thought.

All this because I was a coward who was terrified of the things going on in her mind. And now she was running around, putting her mind and body at risk for some idea of revenge. I was fucking useless right now in the fact that I couldn't chase after her. If I did I was bound to be captured by the Volturi, I was just about as high a target as Bella. Maybe even higher. And I already knew how that game ended, except if I really did die, there wouldn't be a get out of jail free card.

So I was stuck. Liam would go after her of course, as he usually does. We all knew her target so there weren't any questions or issues there, but I knew Bella all too well. If she really didn't want to be found, she would not be found. The only reason why we got her with her emotions off was because of the sloppy body trail. There would be none of that this time.

"I'm sorry Alice. This is all my fault." Rosalie had come back into my room, looking even worse than before.

"Why is it when something goes wrong in this family, everyone jumps to take the blame?"

"Because it's true. It is my fault. I pushed her into admitting what was holding her back. I knew she was thinking of revenge."

"Yeah. Well at least you asked her. All I did was sweep things under the rug."

"That's not true Alice! You did all you could think of. You tried to get her all this help, me being one of them. I'm the one that failed."

"Yes but I'm her wife!" I suddenly felt immense sympathy for Bella and all her emotional outbursts. My sanity was barely hanging on by a thread with everyone breathing down my neck. Possibly another reason why she left. "I'm supposed to be the one to talk her through things! Even if I can't relate, I can at least understand! I just shoved her off as someone else's problem and let them deal with it."

"That's ridiculous! We all know you did no such thing!"

"Didn't I though?" I did. I know I did. It's like I hadn't learned anything in the time we've spent together.

"No. You didn't. She would have left eventually for the same reasons. It's just something she has to do." Rosalie said it so nonchalantly, like it was just another mission she was going on.

"It's going to get her killed Rose! Or even worse off than she was before. Every time I get her back, she returns with less pieces of herself. What will happen if she gets captured again? Or better yet, what will happen if she actually accomplishes what she set out to do?"

"She can finally move on Alice. Isn't that what you want?"

"Not if it costs her soul."