"I'm leaving Hollywood Arts."
She felt her stomach drop. "What do you mean you're leaving Hollywood Arts? As in, you're going back to Northridge?"
"No love. I'm not going back to Northridge." He sighed, before continuing. "I'm going back to London."
She didn't respond. She couldn't believe this was happening.
"Father asked me run one of his studios in London and I accepted." He looked at her, but she just stared down at the sand.
"How long are you going to be there?"
He sighed. "For good, unfortunately. I'll have occasional business trips here and there, but most of my time will require me to stay in London at the studio."
She felt her stomach rise up again, and then drop back down. "What about the band?"
"I already spoke to them. They understand, and I've given them privileges to record music – unsigned – at my father's studio here."
She paused. "What is happening?" she thought to herself. She hesitated in asking this question, but she had to know. "What about me?"
He cupped her face with both of his hands. "Jade. I don't have to leave." He sighed before continuing. He knew what he was about to say would hurt her, but he had to tell her the truth. "I want to leave because I know that you're still in love with Beck and you're not sure if you're ready to leave him. And I also know that – as much as you don't want to admit it – you have feelings for me. You know I have feelings for you and it isn't fair for you to just string me along on the side. I know you don't mean to do that and you're not just toying with my emotions. I know you feel the same way about me, as I do about you." He paused for a brief moment. "That's why I want to leave; because I can see that you're torn in between Beck and I, and it'll be easier if I just leave."
"What is he saying?" she asked herself in her head. Before she knew it, she blurted out, "Noo-"
Nathan interrupted her. "I already have my ticket and everything is set. I leave next week Friday." He saw tears lingering in her eyes, waiting to fall. "Jade, this isn't an ultimatum. I'm not forcing you to choose right here and right now. I'm not even forcing you to choose by the time I leave, next week. I'm going to be in London. If you tell me that you're done with Beck for good, and that you want to be with me, then I'll come back. I'll stay here with you and cherish you and every moment we spend together. But if you can't; if you tell me that you're not over Beck, then I'll stay in London, waiting for the day you realize that you want to be with me, as bad as I want to be with you."
What could she do? What could she say? She didn't know. She didn't know what to say or whom to choose.
"Why would you leave if you really like me?" she asked, as a tear fell down.
"Because I don't like seeing you like this – hurt. I don't like seeing you in pain and suffering because of me. I don't like looking into your dazzling blue/green eyes and seeing it filled with tears and a tornado of emotions like hurt, sadness, guilt, confusion, frustration, and everything in between. I just care about you so much, that I would do anything to take away your pain, even if it meant having to leave you." He truly did feel whatever she felt. When she would be in pain, he felt so guilt-ridden.
She was speechless. Nathan held her tight stroking her hair and caressing her head, while she sobbed on his chest. Hours past and she still sobbed. She let out an ocean full of tears. She couldn't do this with Beck, but with Nathan she felt comfortable enough to do so.
When she got home, she couldn't sleep. Instead she cried onto her pillow, that she hugged securely between her chest and arms. She rocked back and forth, sobbing loudly.
She thought of who it was going to be. She constantly fought battles in her head, deciding which is the better option. Then she thought about which one she had stronger feelings for and which one she desired more. She also thought about whom she could picture her life with.
People say, "my hearts hurts." It may be mentally and emotionally speaking after a heartbreak, or physically by heartburn. Jade could literally feel her heart aching; not because of heartburn, but because she was so emotionally torn. Her heart and her head was jumbled up inside. She could feel her heart agonizing over her predicament.
As if she didn't feel torn already. Emotionally, she felt like a rubber band being stretched out in two directions; one side Beck and the other Nathan. There was no easy way out, where no one would get hurt. If she chose Beck, Nathan would be hurt. If she chose Nathan, Beck would be hurt. And every option, no matter what, she would get hurt too.
Will Jade stop Nathan from leaving?
Will she choose Beck?
If she does choose Beck,
will she later realize that she wants to be with Nathan?
Or will she choose Nathan, and later realize that she wants to be with Beck?
Stay tuned to find out!
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