AN: OMG! I can't believe I reached the 200th mark for reviews! You guys rock! Thank you so much! I really appreciate it! It's because of you, this story keeps on going. I love that you're enjoying it as much as I love writing it. I want to thank my beta, MidnightStarr for her lovely skills. This story would not be possible if it wasn't for her.
It was the middle of the night when Leah woke up clutching her stomach. She stifled a moan, not wanting to wake up Jake. She knew the minute he saw her in distress, he would go into panic mode. She tried to move off the bed slowly, but she underestimated him.
Jake's eyes opened the minute she moved an inch away from him. Her warmth from his side vanished and he sat up at once and turned to her side of the bed to see her clutching her stomach.
"Baby what's wrong?"
Leah sat up a little straighter, her feet hanging down over the side of the bed. "My stomach hurts…Kind of."
"On no…This must be the cramps dad was talking about." He moved over to her and put an arm around her. "Would you like me to rub your tummy for you sweetie?"
Leah shook her head at him. "I'm going to take a late night bath, lay down in the tub for a while. When I was on my cycle and got cramps, soaking in warm water helped sooth my stomach."
"Okay…I'll check on you in a moment."
Leah smiled weakly at him, got up, still clutching her stomach, and walked out the door to go to the bathroom.
Jake watched her go until she disappeared from sight, then he got up and turned on the TV. He was not going back to sleep now, especially since Leah's cramps just started. He laid back on the bed and watched a couple late night sitcoms that were playing. After ten minutes, he could not take it anymore so he switched off the TV, then went to look for Leah. He opened the bathroom door and saw her lying down in the tub, her whole body covered with bubbles. Even with the sweet scent of the bubble bath gel, he could still smell her alluring scent. He and his wolf purred at it and he took a deep breath and inhaled, savoring the scent of the sea breeze with a mixture of strawberries and pineapples. He then walked over to her, knelt by the tub, and stroked her hair.
Leah opened her eyes and gave him a soft smile. "Hey."
"Hey boo." Jake continued stroking her hair. "How is your bath coming along? Your stomach still hurts?"
Leah shrugged. "It doesn't really 'hurt' I guess; it's just uncomfortable." Her head leaned into his hands, her wolf purring at the contact with her hair since it was her weakness.
Jake saw how much stroking her soothed her so he continued. He then leaned down and kissed her. His wolf was still purring at her and just loved her. It told him to pleasure her, comfort her, make her feel good. He had not touched her in a while and he had the urge to do it. His left hand stayed in her hair stroking it, then his right hand moved onto her breasts, palming, caressing, and stroking them one by one. The bubbles were slowly diminishing and her body became more visible.
A soft sigh of contentment escaped Leah, her damp skin glistening in the dull bathroom light and she seemed reluctant to pull her lips away from Jake's. As soon as he moved an inch, she searched them out again.
Jake continued kissing her while caressing her breasts. He started to tweak them, their nipples becoming hard as rocks and highly sensitive. His wolf purred even more when he heard Leah's moans.
Jake did very well to get her mind off of her stomach and Leah grew eager to return the favor. One hand left the hot water and slipped under the waistline of his boxers, damp fingers caressing over his already stiff cock.
Jake groaned at the contact of her fingers rubbing him. His wolf started to growl this time and he pulled away from the kiss and stood up. He discarded his clothes and went to stand in the tub. He slid the sliding glass door closed and pulled Leah to stand. He pressed her back up against the wall and resumed kissing her while his hands roamed all over her body.
Leah moaned softly against his lips as his hands brushed over the sensitive places. She gripped his dick gently in her hand again, beginning a slow, pleasing rhythm with her palm. That was going to lead to his orgasm building and crashing over him instead of taking him by surprise. She wanted to see the look on his face when she brought him to cum.
Jake pulled away from the kiss and tilted his head back, moaning as Leah's hand stroked his cock tantalizingly slow. His right hand drifted to her wet pussy and began to stroke it. As he was doing this, he was watching her intently. He was stroking her as she was stroking him. The both of them pleasured each other to the brink of insanity. They were both panting and breathing hard. Jake took a finger and pushed it inside her and began pumping in and out of her.
Leah gulped, her head tilting back against the cool shower tile and she bit her bottom lip. A small groan of pleasure escaped her throat and her hand on his cock began to speed up. Her hand caressed the head of him before her whole palm wrapped around him again and jacked him from top to bottom. She loved the feel of him in her hand almost as much as she loved his fingers inside her; his strength. She could only imagine what his dick inside her would feel like and she shivered involuntary at the thought. "Jake…" She breathed out, her voice soft. "I love you."
Jake's wolf started to get more aggressive and he growled intensely. He was growling and groaning, his mind beginning to go blank. He loved her hand around him, pleasing him. He felt like he was in a perfect place; a heavenly, serene place where his dreams came true. Leah was his dream, his world. He dreamed, spoke, lived, and breathed Leah. He was loving the rapid movement on his dick and he returned the favor by inserting another finger inside her and the two fingers moved inside her like a scissors. They were opening and closing and touching every inch inside her body.
Leah moaned loudly at the movements. Her hips bucked into his hand, shoulders against the shower tile too as she arched herself on him, panting and moaning. Jacob was her future; at least she hoped he would be. This was the happiest she's even been in years and it was all because of him. Her hand on him moved even faster.
Jake looked at her intensely again, loving the expressions on Leah's face. His fingers moved even faster as her hips bucked onto his fingers. He also moved against the hand on his cock, loving the friction it was causing. He knew he was close. "Lee…Baby…" He panted. "I love you; you're my everything."
Leah squeezed her eyes shut tightly as she let out a shriek of his name, her knees bending against the shower wall as she reached her peak, brought on by his words. The hand on him squeezed before it caressed him even faster, a rhythm his hips could barely keep up with anymore. She moved on him until he was at the final door as well.
Jake's head started to get fuzzy. His brain was all static; he could not think. He was going to cum…Hard. "I'm cumming. I'm cumming with you baby!" He came hard and his whole body shuddered at the impact of his orgasm. Streaks of his white, hot, liquid heat landed on top of her body and also on the shower wall. He then collapsed on top of her, breathing and panting hard. He felt like he just ran a two-mile marathon.
Leah's breathing was just as heavy and she wrapped her small arms around him to keep him upright against her. Using her foot, she started the water again and made it so that the shower rained down on them instead; delightfully cool water. Her hands ran up his back, washing away the sweat and stress in his muscles.
Jake felt breathless; he had no more words to describe how she made him feel. His brain was still full of static. He loved the gentle movements of her hands on him. His wolf was purring at the contact and he felt at peace. He was her emperor and she was his empress.
Leah kissed behind his ear, hands running up over his shoulders and arms, cleaning him and soothing his tremors.
Jake's body was in pure bliss; his one and only was taking such good care of him. She finished up with the cleaning and then he took over and started to clean her. He took some body wash, squeezed a portion into the bath sponge, then rubbed it across chest, back, arms, legs, ass, and also her creamy pussy. He took extra care of her pussy though and then he rubbed her shoulders and also her neck.
Leah loved his caring, gentle hands. They were always perfect it seemed. When she was raunchy, they were rough. When she was upset, they were comforting. When she was angry, they were soothing. When she was tired, they were gentle. And when she was loving, his hands were all of the above and she wouldn't trade a second of his touches. She moved forward and hugged into his chest, kissing his right pec.
Jake held Leah tightly when she hugged him. He held her so tightly like it was the end of the world. God…He loved her so much. He has loved Leah since they were kids and he would do anything for her. She was a spectacular woman who deserved the best there was. He could not imagine his life without her. Sometimes, he still could not believe she was his. He thought it was all one big dream. If it was, he did not want to wake up. However, Leah was real and she was there with him; she was with him forever. He was never letting her go. He cupped her face in his hands, then smiled softly and sweetly. "I love you so much. I will never let you go." He kissed her briefly. "Let's go to bed."
Leah smiled back and pecked his lips three or four times in succession before she got out of the shower and walked into the bedroom. After their session in the bathroom, she did feel better. The intensity of the cramps turned into a dull ache and she knew she could go to sleep now.
Jake followed her with their towels and Leah put her and his clothes on the bed. He towel dried her first then himself and proceeded to dress her. He lotioned her arms and legs, dressed her gently, giving her a nice squeeze in certain places.
Leah smirked at Jake's vicarious squeezes, but could not help the small yawn that escaped. She lotioned his arms and legs as well, then bent down and pulled up his boxers. After making sure they were both dressed and comfy, she crawled into bed, beckoning him in with her. "C'mon…I'm tired." She yawned again.
Jake crawled in next to her and pulled her back to his chest. His hands rested on her stomach. "Feel better?"
"Yes…Thank you Jake." Leah said softly.
"You're welcome. Goodnight baby…Sweet dreams."
Leah turned her head at him and grinned, kissing his jaw. "Love you." Minutes later, she fell asleep.
"Love you too." Jake whispered. He did not fall asleep right away. He was thinking on how he was going to tell the pack the news. A part of him was worried and part of him was not. Eventually, sleepiness won out and he dozed off.
Jake woke up the next morning. Leah was still asleep beside him, but he could hear the voices of Seth and the packs in the kitchen down below. He got out of bed, went to the bathroom to relieve himself and freshen up, then went downstairs. "Good morning guys!"
"Hey." Jared greeted.
"Morning Jake." Quil and Embry said.
"Hey Jake!" Seth beamed. He was the only one with a smile.
The others just nodded their greeting. Every guy, except Seth, was feeling a little strangled. They could still smell Leah, strongly, and she was upstairs.
"Hey before we eat, I have something I need to tell you guys. Seth will assist me." Jake announced.
Sam already knew what it was, but listened anyway.
Jared raised an eyebrow. "Please tell me that you know why I'd much rather think with my head downstairs instead of the one on my shoulders?"
"Yes that's exactly what Seth and I are going to discuss with you." Jake assured.
All of their attention were on Jake and then Seth stood next to his right side.
"Well?" Paul prompted.
Jake took a deep breath and then exhaled. 'Man this is hard.' He glanced at Seth and saw him nod to urge him on and reminding him he was by his side. Jake faced the guys again and proceeded to tell them everything, with the assistance of Seth, they found out from his father the day before.
When they were done, the guys, besides Sam, looked at them with their eyes wide and their mouths hanging open. Jared was the first to recover.
"What the fuck?"
Next was Paul. "Leah can get knocked up?"
Quil and Embry were stunned and could not say a word as of yet. They were still processing everything. It seemed like they were more animalistic than they all thought. Seth took the initiative and answered Paul's question.
"Yes…Leah can get pregnant, but only in mating season. You guys must be careful though. Remember…This season causes severe anxiety and animosity between the males. It's not intentional and would not be your faults, but please try to control yourselves. Jake and I will not hesitate in using force to get you to back off if it comes down to that." Seth announced in warning. He knew it was not their fault so he decided the force would not be harsh unless the situation called for it.
"No wonder we always want to kill each other. That part makes me feel better." Jared confessed.
Sam was just listening quietly, not saying a word. He would only nod here and there, but no words came from his mouth. Leah's scent called to him as well and he was too busy trying to tame the alpha in him to care about what was going on.
"Yes…that explains the jealousy. Right now Leah's in bed still sleeping. She woke up in the middle of the night with some cramps." Jake said.
Seth looked at him in alarm, but Jake stopped him from speaking.
"It's okay Seth. I took care of her and she felt better afterwards." Jake gave him a soft smile. He knew how much Seth worried about Leah. He turned back to the guys. "From what I've gathered, she's in the second week already. That's why her scent is much stronger than last week. Be warned: it'll drive you crazy for a while, but at least try to behave yourselves. Any questions?"
Paul shrugged. "I don't think so."
"This is just…" Jared trailed off. "It's not normal for me to want to have kids already, but I do."
"Well go have them with Kim. Leah is mine. I know it's not going to be your fault for the way you'll be acting, but like Seth said, at least try to control yourselves. I would not want to have to hurt any of you. Got it?" Jake asked as he looked at all them.
"We'll try." Paul confirmed.
The others nodded. Jake continued to speak. "I know you guys will want to be close to her and ache to touch her in some way. I also noticed you guys are a little more affectionate with her and that is fine. A little rub here and there or a hug is…" He sighed deeply. "Look…Just know that Seth and I will be watching you carefully." He then growled intensely. "If any of you, and I mean any of you ever disrespect or touch her in any way that is inappropriate, I won't hesitate to kick your ass and break your hands. I will break them so bad, they won't heal for a long time. I mean it."
"I get it Jake. If it was Claire, I would behave the same way." Quil admitted.
The others nodded in agreement.
"Okay…Glad we understand each other perfectly. I'm going to start breakfast now. Who wants to assist me?" Jake grinned at them like nothing happened and went into the kitchen.
Seth went and turned on his Nintendo Wii to entertain himself, while the others all exchanged looks. Jared sighed. "I'll help you Jake."
"Thanks Jared."
Jared joined Jake in the kitchen and they both made a big breakfast which consisted of scrambles eggs, grits, bacon, sausages, hash browns, toasts, and pancakes. Each item was in a separate plate and the plates were piled very high. Jake fixed a plate for Leah and himself, poured two glasses of orange juice, then took both plates and glasses and went upstairs to meet his girl. He wanted to give his girl breakfast in bed and hoped it would be a nice surprise for her.
Leah was still in bed, but awake when Jake came into her room. She had an arm around her stomach and her knees were tucked up slightly.
"Hey baby…Good morning. Jared and I made breakfast. It might not taste as good as how you make them, but it's fine and edible." He placed the plates and glasses on the nightstand, then sat down on the bed next to her. He placed an arm around her shoulders. "How are you baby? How did you sleep?"
Leah leaned into his arms, her own arms clutching her stomach. "Fine, but my stomach is killing me this morning." She groaned.
"I'm sorry Lee." He carefully moved her hands from her stomach and put one of his own on it and began to rub it slowly. "Instead of eating all of this food, would you like some tea instead? It'll help with the cramps."
Leah shook her head. "No I'll eat. But can I still have some tea?"
Jake kissed her cheek. "Sure thing baby." He got off the bed and headed downstairs into the kitchen and started to work on the tea right away. He made her some green leaf tea. He remembered making this same tea for his sisters when they got their cramps. He finished making the tea by adding two cubes of sugar and began to stir it.
Jared looked up from his breakfast. "I didn't think you drank tea."
"It's not for me; it's for Leah." Jake said as he turned to Jared with the mug in hand.
Seth perked up from his video game and asked anxiously, "Is she okay Jake?"
"She's okay, but her stomach is hurting her. She's trying to eat her breakfast now." Jake assured.
"The cramps huh? I wish there was something more I could do." Seth said, his face sullen.
Paul cringed. "Ouch."
"She'll be okay Seth. She's strong and it's only for a few more days. After this week is over, she'll be good as new." Jake gave him a soft smile.
"Sorry to hear that Jake. Tell her we're here if she needs anything." Embry said.
"I will thanks. I'm going back to her now. I hope the tea helps." Jake turned around and headed back upstairs to his girl. He came into the bedroom and saw a plate half empty. "How was breakfast baby?" He asked as he gave her the mug of tea.
Leah smiled weakly at him and sat up slowly, sipping at the tea. "It was pretty good."
Jake grinned. "Glad to hear that. I wanted to give you a break and make something for a change. How is the tea?"
"It's good too." Leah kissed his jaw. "Thanks."
Jake gave her another grin. "You're welcome. It's my duty to take care of my boo. Are you finished with your plate? Do you still want the orange juice?"
Leah smiled weakly again and nodded. "I don't think I can eat anymore; I'll puke if I do."
Jake smiled at her softly then grabbed the plates and juice. He ate from both plates quickly then burped. "Excuse me." He chuckled at Leah's face. "I'll be right back." He took the empty plates and glasses then went back downstairs. He put the dishes in the sink then turned to the guys. "Can someone please wash the dishes?"
"Yeah we'll take care of it. She's not coming downstairs today?" Jared inquired. He seemed to be speaking the most today.
Jake raised an eyebrow at him. "I don't know yet; she's not feeling well. It depends on how she feels."
"I'm going upstairs to see her; I'll be back." Seth dropped his controller on the floor nicely then went upstairs quickly. However, he met her on the stairs and he paused in front of her for a moment. "Lee! Morning! I was just coming to check on you." He hugged her and rubber her back. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I'm being stabbed in the stomach." Leah groaned and hugged him back. It was unusual not seeing him first this morning.
"Did the tea Jake brought to you helped at all?" Seth continued rubbing her back.
Leah chuckled softly. "I only drank it like four seconds ago Seth. You need to give it time to kick in."
"I know; I'm just worried about you that's all." Seth pulled away and held her at arms length. "Sis you should be in bed. You shouldn't move around too much."
"I can't stay in bed for a week Seth." Leah smiled weakly, put her arm around his shoulders, and walked downstairs with him. She was a little slower when she walked because of the cramps, but that was no big deal. When they got to the living room, Leah sank down on the couch.
Seth followed her and sat down right next to her. He could not help but be a little paranoid. Jake sat down next to her too on the other side. Her two favorite guys on each side of her body, one on the left and one on the right. Leah placed her head on top of Jake and her legs on Seth.
"Hey Lee!" Quil greeted cheerily.
"Hey Leah!" Embry greeted just the same.
Sam nodded at her. Paul nodded at her too, while Jared gave her a smile.
Leah gave them all a small smile. "Hi."
Jake began stroking her hair and rubbing her stomach, while Seth rubbed her feet. The guys all narrowed their eyes at the display from Jake. They wanted to get close too but did not know how. Embry and Quil suddenly got an idea. They got up from their positions and went over to the couch and sat on the floor in front of Leah's legs. Being close to Leah made them feel better somehow.
Jake and Seth tensed at first, but relaxed when Quil and Embry just sat down. They did say the others could be close. It was just weird seeing it actually happen.
"Paul can you please put on a movie?" Seth asked.
"Sure." Paul grabbed the DVD case from the table, flipped through it, pulled out 'Rush Hour 3,' then put it in. The movie started and they all turned their attention to the screen. The packs spent their day watching movies and in between ate lunch and spoke. They did this until it was almost midnight where they decided to go their separate ways.
As Leah was getting ready for bed, she was complaining about her cramps. It seemed like they were back with a vengeance.
"Would you like me to make another cup of tea for you baby? It looked like it helped you this morning and kept you for most of the day." Jake said as he went over to her.
Leah smiled weakly. "Yes please." Her wolf was beyond flattered that Jake was taking the time to look after her.
Jake nodded then went downstairs into the kitchen to make the tea. It took him about seven minutes then he was back upstairs handing the mug over to Leah. "Here you go baby." He then sat on the bed next to her.
Leah kissed his pack tattoo on his arm and took a sip of the tea. "Thanks love."
Jake grinned. "You're welcome." He loved taking care of her. He was so good at it, being that he took care of his dad all the time, not to mention he took care of Becky whenever she was sick. Rachel was more of a ride-or-die chick and wanted to deal with her sicknesses alone, most of the time. "You can place the mug on the nightstand when you're done. I'll take it down in the morning."
Leah nodded and finished her tea in ten minutes or so. Then she crawled underneath the covers and cuddled into Jake's chest.
Jake wrapped his arms around her, then started to rub her stomach with one of his hands. "I hope this rubbing helps you. I hate that you're not feeling well. I wish there was something more I could do."
Leah smirked. "Outside of knocking me up? I don't think so."
Jake looked down at her and winked. "To think that in the future, I'll be rubbing your beautiful, round belly that'll be ripe with my child."
Leah smiled at him. "You want kids?"
"Of course I do. I would love to have kids someday. A little girl who's just as beautiful as you and a handsome son who looks like me. Then again, it could be the other way around. Our little girl with my features and our little boy with yours. Do you want kids?"
Leah gave him a bright smile. "You know I do. We had a big talk about this long ago. Well…Before you told me to go back to La Push and be miserable. But I forgive you. I want a big family…Three or four or maybe five kids."
Jake's face lit up. "Really? I want a big family too, but four. I would like to have two boys and two girls, you know…Make it even. Our kids would have each other to talk to. I didn't have anyone; my sisters had each other. I know I had them, but it was not the same. Although I must say that Becky and I were close and still really good. She reminded me more of mom, personality wise. I miss Becky so much, but we do talk on the phone a lot. I hope one day we could visit her. What do you say?"
Leah smiled. "That sounds wonderful. I would love to get to know Rebecca again." She smirked. "Seth and I always made do with each other. Back then…I had Emily." She sighed.
"True but you and Seth were all you two had. Yeah you did have Emily, but that did not work out and I'm sorry for that babe. I know how much you loved her." Jake said as he continued rubbing her stomach.
Leah sighed. "It's okay. I don't want that kind of person in my life. You still don't know all the dirty details."
"Do I want to know?"
"No."
"Let's keep it that way for now. Lee?"
"Mm?"
"I have something I want to tell you."
"And that is?"
"Do you remember the night you came home drunk?"
Leah nodded. "Yeah…Well some of it."
"Do you remember where you were that night?" Jake inquired.
Leah nodded again. "The beach."
Jake took a deep breath. "Well that day you went to work. Seth, the guys, and I came home from patrol to find the house empty, but knew you were home because of the food you left us on the table. We stayed there, ate, and waited for you to come home, but you never came so we went to look for you when it was very late. We thought something was wrong, especially when we could not reach you on your cell. We went to the beach first cause we figured if you wanted to be alone, that would be the first place you'd go. When we got there, we saw you with your friends and I'll confess that we stayed there for a little while just to keep an eye on you and then after a while, we left."
Leah smiled weakly. "Ah…Listened in?"
"We were not going to, but we heard our names and we couldn't help but to listen. We decided not to bother you because you looked so carefree and relaxed so we left you there. Your friends and cousins adore you and we saw you like spending time with them." Jake explained.
Leah smiled weakly. "They were there for me when you guys weren't."
Jake frowned. "I wasn't there for you? I thought I was."
"That's not what I mean. I had people who really understood or at least tried to." Leah clarified.
"Lee…You never told us you were sick." Jake reminded.
"You had Renesmee; I needed someone who was on the outside, like me." Leah said.
"You kept your sickness from us and was going to leave us, leave me. Renesmee? Oh please…I understand that, but I wish you spoke to us a little more. You closed yourself off from us, from me. You pushed us away." Jake announced.
"Yeah I didn't want to get to now you better as soon you changed." Leah sat up and got out of bed. "You will never have any idea Jacob, how bad it was. Sitting in the fucking meadow with all of you, watching Sam kiss Emily, Paul fucking Rachel in his head, and Kim and Jared being so frigging cute it could give you diabetes when I was stuck alone. And then there was you and fucking Bella. Here's something you never knew. I liked you too when we were younger you know. I joined your pack not to get away from Sam. I did it to get to you! I thought maybe finally, you were getting over Bella, but no. It was just more shit. Day after day something else happened to make me want to drive the nail into my own coffin even more. I just so fucking fed up with daily life."
Jake perked up at her words and he was stunned. "You liked me when we were younger? Leah…Why didn't you say something? Also…You were so into Sam at the time. How was I supposed to know that? Then when you and Sam broke up, you became so angry and bitter. You pushed everyone away, especially me. I was your friend from the very beginning and I tried to be there for you, but you wouldn't let me."
Leah shook her head in amazement. "You still think the only fucking reason I was angry was over Sam!"
Jake shook his head. "No I did not mean that. It's just that you acted like you did not need anybody or me."
"Look at my skank of a mother Jacob, look at my brother who suddenly has no more time to got to school because he's too busy with this fucked up life! What about my 'best friend,' cousin who stabbed me in the back and oh…I killed my dad! Let's not forget about that. And here comes the icing on the cake; I was dying too. But you're right…I didn't want to talk to any of you." Leah announced, her eyes flashing in the dim light.
Jake got off the bed and went over to her. "Leah…I knew how bad you had it. I can never fully understand because I am not in your shoes, but I did try to help you. I did. How was I supposed to help you if you didn't want it? Why didn't you want to talk to me?"
"I didn't expect you to help. I expected you to go on with your little lives and forget I was left in the dust. Because I was content with that then, bitch or not. Because back then…You weren't my Jacob." Leah said as she faced him head on and spoke those words. "None of you were yourselves; sometimes you guys still aren't."
Jake tensed at her words. He could not believe what he was hearing. His wolf was growling. "You have no idea how I felt when you pushed me away." His voice was soft.
"It looked to me like you wanted to spend time with Bella a lot more that you did with me Jake!" Leah spat at him.
Jake's voice was still soft when he responded; his mind still replaying her words from the beginning of the conversation. "I have admired and wanted you my whole life. I wanted to be there for you so much, but you shut me down at every turn. You made it sound like you did not need or want me…At all." Jake's voice raised. "You pushed me into Bella! You claimed to not want or need me at the time, so I was tired of getting my heart crushed so I went to someone who wanted my help. You pushed me into Bella, Leah. YOU!"
"Do you think I wasn't tired of the same damn thing? You expect me to be happy go fucking lucky over the man I loved more than anything dumping me on my ass for my best friend?" Leah shouted.
"Oh please…That was not what I meant and you know it. It was always you all along, but you left. You changed so therefore I changed." Jake announced.
"Like I said Jacob…You'll never understand!"
Jake had had enough. He was tired of hearing that. He understood and he did very well. His voice raised even higher. "No! You don't understand! The same way how you got dumped is the same way you dumped me!" He moved closer to her and looked at her intensely. "I was in love with you. All that time, I loved you. When you turned me away, I went to Bella because she helped take my mind off of you…Off of the pain of your rejection. Seth told you how I felt back then and I'm not lying. I loved you so much and I still do; you know that now. You think I had it easy! I didn't! My mother died when I was seven years old. My dad is in a wheelchair. My sisters bolted the minute they graduated from high school and left me…left me here to take care of my disabled dad. Here's what you didn't know! My dad was in a depression for five years after my mom died and I had to deal with that as well. Then at sixteen, I phased for the first time. My whole life changed in an instant and it's not normal! I am the true alpha and the next chief of the tribe since I'm Ephraim Black's grandson! Do you know how many responsibilities I would have had if I took the position when Sam offered it to me? Me! A sixteen-year-old boy at the time!"
Leah was taken aback. She truly did not think of all that. "But you didn't, you made the right choice!"
Jake was on a roll. Leah had no idea what he went through and she had no right to judge him. Maybe if she never pushed him away, she would've known. They could've probably helped each other, but no…she didn't want any help. "Yeah I didn't take it because of all the strain I knew it would've caused me. So don't you dare make it seem like I had it easy! Even after all the pain and stress I had, I didn't run! I did not want to throw my life away. If I did, who would have taken care of my dad! No one! Rachel and Rebecca would've never give up their lives to come back here!"
All Leah could do was stay quiet. Jake never raised his voice at her like that before, but she realized she asked for it.
Jake paused to catch his breath, then continued. Leah started this and he was going to damn well finish it. "I was working too you know. I struggled just like you! I have no mother, but a disabled dad, who stuck by me and whom I love very much! Besides, my dad, I was alone! I was practically on my own the same time as you…Hell even before you. You don't have the right to tell me I changed and I don't understand! Cause I understand a helluva lot more than you give me credit for! When Bella came into town, she was the only person I could talk to. You were not there. That's how this whole thing started with Bella. The same way how you had your friends is the same way how I had mine! But you don't see me going over to the mansion without telling you anything. Hell…Bella and I don't even speak anymore. Nessie is my friend now and not even her I talk to much. I respect you enough to not rub her in your face. Now you know the whole fucking story!" Jake was panting when he was done and could not stand to be there anymore. He turned around and began walking towards the door.
Leah was in shock after Jake was done. When she saw him turn around and head for the door, she began to panic internally. "Where are you going?"
Jake paused, but did not turn around. "Downstairs to think. I am hurt and angry right now and I don't want to take it out on you or upset you any further. You're already not feeling well."
Leah knew she had to do something. "Don't go."
Jake kept his back to her, his hand reached for the doorknob. "Why? You have more knives you want to stab me with?"
Leah looked away and then changed her mind. "Just go downstairs Jake." She walked to the closet and pulled on a sweater. "I'm going to the beach. Look…I told you." She pushed open her window and scaled the tree.
Jake's back was still turned. "You're missing the point. So it's like that? I tell you I'm leaving the room for you and you want to go out to the beach? You know what? Stay in the house, I'll fucking leave. It's obvious you don't want be near me right now, so fine. I'm sorry if I told you the truth and you couldn't handle it. The truth hurts I know." His wolf was howling in pain and anguish at how Leah treated him. It did not like being mad at it's mate or it's mate being mad at him. Even though he was not at fault, he still loved her and was willing to think of her and make her more comfortable.
"I just want to go for a frigging swim Jake!" Leah announced.
Jake finally turned around to face her. "You know the danger of being out there. You can't go out there…Not in your condition. Besides it's late. You can go for a swim tomorrow. Listen to me just this once. For once, just listen to me!"
Leah looked at him then out at the water.
Jake sighed. "Stay here; I'm leaving." He turned around to walk out again.
Leah's heart was warring with her soul. "I don't want you to leave."
Jake paused again and turned back to face her. "What?"
Leah took a deep breath. "I said I don't want you to leave."
"Why?" Jake's face was blank.
"Because…" Leah paused, then gritted her teeth. "Can't we just fucking forget the damn reasons for everything? They caused our first fucking fight! I don't want to argue anymore." She sighed. "Things are what they are, let's leave it at that."
Jake's face turned hard and his eyes narrowed. "Yeah…We had our first fucking fight because truths came out." His face then looked crestfallen. "For the record, you're the one who started it and accused me of those things. A lot of them were hurtful and you never stopped to think of how those words would hurt me." He took a deep breath. "I am starting to get the feeling that you felt that way about me your whole life and I am not sure of how you feel now. It seems like you had those things bottled up inside you for awhile now and they are just now starting to come out. I have proven to you time and time again how I feel, but for some reason it's not enough. Will it ever be enough?" Jake and his wolf were so wounded. He was battling with himself on leaving or not. "Will I ever be enough?"
Leah whipped around to face him then, tears running down her cheeks. "How could you ever, fucking think you're not enough!" She marched over to him and grabbed his cheeks. "I'm still here for you! I kept living for you! I still would. Jacob…You more than enough."
Jake's voice was a so soft, Leah could barely hear him. Words could not explain how hurt he truly was. "Am I? Sometimes I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. You have to meet me halfway Leah. I can't do this on my own. Am I enough? Tonight you made me feel like I'm not. Do you have any idea what your words did to me tonight? Any idea?"
Leah's grip on his cheeks tightened. "I'm sorry…I'm trying Jake! I really am!"
Jake pulled away from her. "Are you really trying? Sometimes I feel like I'm paying for Sam's mistakes. I just don't say anything because I thought it was not something to make a big deal about. However, I listened to your words tonight and I guess I am paying for his mistakes. I'm paying for everyone's mistakes. I'm giving you one hundred percent; sometimes even one hundred and ten. Can you honestly tell me you're giving your all into this? Are you giving me one hundred percent?" His voice was still soft, but now broken. His heart felt like it would rip in two.
Leah moved forward to him and put her hands on his shoulders. "Tell me what to change and I will. After hearing you talk tonight, the answer is no. I'm not giving one hundred percent." It was very hard to admit, but she had to tell him the truth. A small piece of her did hold back and that was because of fear. She remembered her conversation with Seth in the kitchen. She truly wasn't giving her all, even if it was only ninety-nine percent. It was just that she was disappointed and hurt so many times and Jake was just too good to be true. She was actually waiting for the rug to be pulled from under her and her happiness with Jake would go to hell. However, She knew she would be able to conquer that fear if she had Jake, but now she may be too late.
"Don't change for me; You need to change for yourself." Jake was crushed to hear that. "So I've been fighting for nothing? I've been giving my all into this for nothing? Wow!" He chuckled sadly, then realized something more heart-breaking. "You don't love me the way I love you." He looked at her, his eyes glittering in the dim light. The tears were there, but he refused to make them fall. "Did you ever love me at all?"
Hearing him ask Leah that tore her heart in two. Her grip on his shoulders tightened even more. "Please…I'm trying."
Jake cupped her left cheek with his right hand. "You can't even answer my question can you? You don't love me. You never have and I guess you never will." He let her cheek go, pulled her hands from his shoulders, then took a step back away from her. He spoke again, but with a whisper. His voice was too broken to be heard. "I will always be here for you whenever you need me, but I can't do this." He turned to leave, but paused and whispered his famous words. "I love you; you're my everything."
Leah's heart dropped. "No! I do love you Jacob…Please!"
"But you don't love me enough." Jake whispered then walked out the door and possibly her life.
"Jacob…Please." Leah sank to her knees on the floor and spent another night crying on the floor over a boy.
AN: You guys did not see that coming huh? Lol! I will admit and say that I cried when I wrote this. Then when I reread it, I cried again. Lol! Review and let me know what you think.