Moviepal: You were kind of right thinking that way about the Sam's reaction. But will she come around…. Only the story knows….lol. The story is going to go into some more stuff right now I think you will really enjoy.

A/N I am sorry for not updating like I said I would before Labor Day holiday was over. But I do have good news this chapter will be super long as it starts to reveal more about the past. Happy reading

Chapter 21: The Benson letters part: II

Two weeks later

The new years has come and gone and I really haven't done anything. I didn't talk with anyone I just don't believe what is going on. How can this be real? I am just laying in bed thinking to myself about the last days, weeks and months and still cannot believe it. Normally I would talk to Carly when I was like this but how could I she wouldn't believe me. So I sat there, I cried there, I thought there.

"Sam" Melanie says softly "Yeah Mel" Sam responds "It's been weeks, what's going on?" Melanie asks "You wouldn't believe me cause I really don't." Sam answers "Sam whatever it is you need to talk about it. This isn't good!" Melanie said. "UGH I don't wanna talk about it, so leave."Sam said "OK, OK I'll leave just , if you need to talk Sam I'm… what's this?" Melanie stopped and picked up the letter from the floor.

Chiz this isn't good I thought. "Give me that now!" Sam exclaimed. "Sorry here." Melanie said while handing her the letter. Sam snatched it and grasped the letter closely to her chest. "Now Leave" Sam said. "Are you going to read it?" Melanie asked. "I can't yet because" Sam Froze "Ok Sam I am going to run some errands, pick up dinner, and tonight I don't care what you say we are talking." Melanie said while leaving Sam's room.

"Hey Freddie" Carly said "Hey Carls what's up?" Freddie said. Carly waltzed into the apartment and plopped down on the couch and turned on the T.V. almost completely ignoring me. "Ok I think you are trying to ignore me." Freddie said. "No just I don't know." Carly said. "Ok give me a sec let's talk about it I just have to finish this." Freddie said.

I finished posting a blog and checking the posts on both ICARLY site and F.A.N.S. app. I don't know how long it was but my couch was empty "Carly?" Freddie called for her. There was no response. Maybe she is back at home. I walked in to her apartment and chuckled that the door is never locked it's like nothing ever changes. I looked around and was about to head up when Spencer had come out of his room back at someone.

"Sorry about the cheese in the shower babe but please …" Spencer said then stopped at the stairs when he saw me. Oh Shit I keep forgetting not everyone knows. "Hey Spencer" Freddie said. "Uh…" Spencer clearly confused couldn't get any words out…..then. "CCCCAAARRRRLLLLYYYYY" Spencer yelled then darted towards me. "Spencer stop please" Carly said at the top of the stairs "Spencer stop." Freddie said when Spencer grabbed me. I thought to myself, man he really needs to work out. I moved his arms off of me and sat him down on the couch. "OK LISTEN SPENCER…just listen." Freddie said. He looked at me then back at Carly. "What is going on here Carly?"Spencer said.

"Ok this is going to be very weird and confusing so please just listen to me ok I will start at the beginning." Carly started saying then I had to step in. "OK cut it Carly that will take to long lets skip to the question session that will come after. Spencer I am Freddie, the kid that was in your house all hours of the night pranking you with Sam. The one who went to the Galaxy Wars rerelease marathon and helped you make a nug-nug robot for the event. The one who was shot here and had amnesia thought he was a guy named Marcus and until just a few months ago. So Yes I am Freddie Benson and I guess old habits die hard, I walked in just like I used to what questions did you have Spence." Freddie said.

There was just a few minutes of silence. "Ok if you are Freddie Benson….Prove it." Spencer said "Ok what do you want me to do." Freddie said. "Answer some questions." Spencer said. "Ok sure go ahead" Freddie said. "Ok, ICARLY evil arch nemesis?" Spencer said "Nevel Papperman next" Freddie said. "Carly almost died once how did it happen?" Spencer asked. "Once." Freddie responded. "HA I knew you were lying" Spencer said. "Why do you say that" Freddie said. "You couldn't tell me something that wasn't on ICARLY…" he started to turn towards the room with smugness about him. "There was more than one time Spencer but I forgot you weren't there for the other one. Sam and Carly were having a fight and they sort of decided not to do the show anymore and they were arguing and somehow or another they ended up on the window cleaner and the wire broke and they were going to fall you and me pulled them up and saved them. That was the one you remember because you were a part of it. But the one you are probably forgetting is the taco truck incident where I got hit with the taco truck pushing Carly out of the way. So to answer your question she didn't almost die once it was twice and you want more proof Spencer. You were always like a big brother to me and I always looked up at you. One night I came to the apartment looking for advice. You were naked and you still answered the door. One of the few times I didn't just come in. we sat right here just opposite you sat me down and told me that I was a good looking dude but you weren't into guys like that… then you gave me the best advice I have ever received about love. You didn't say it but it's what I got out of it. You told me a story about Illia and how you loved her and how things went bad over the Carly situation. And what I got out of it was No matter what when you know you have the right one, you just know. Even then when you and Elaina were jest dating you knew. Because when you told me that you and her were only dating for five months you had a twinkle in your eye… you knew then just as you know now. I am Freddie Spence." Freddie said.

It looked like Spencer was about to say something when the baby monitor just burst into flames. "OH MY GOD WHAT DO I DO, THE MONITOR IS ON FIRE IS THE BABY ON FIRE. AGH" and just like that Spencer was off to upstairs and trying to put out a fire that I am sure he thinks is on the baby. I know how he thinks. "Five …four…three…two…" Freddie said. "The baby is not on fire and she is sleeping fine."Spencer said. "We know that Spencer." Carly said with a laugh. Just then Elaina came out of the bedroom "What is all of this noise going on out here…Oh Carly who is, is that the guy from the cruise?" Elaina asked.

"Elaina do you remember me talking about Carly and her friends web show?" Spencer said. "Yeah" Elaina answered. "Ok well it turns out that this is Freddie um he was, well he had." Spencer was trying to explain. "Elaina Freddie had amnesia after the shooting incident years ago and he has slowly started to remember who he was. And well it sort of has Spencer freaked out." Carly said. Elaina stood there for a moment taking in everything then gasped. "Sam" Elaina said. "Yeah I tried to tell her a few weeks ago but I she doesn't believe me. It is probably my fault I took too much time getting to know her as Marcus for her to believe that this is real. I have probably lost her forever." Freddie said. "Oh don't say that you were her world she loves you so much it is just a little too much to take in right now for her, that's all." Elaina said. "I don't think so this time, she told me that I was taking advantage of her feelings and that she didn't believe me, but." Freddie paused. "But what Freddie?" Carly asked. "I told her something only I would have been able to know, she still left she said for me to just let her go." Freddie said with a small tear falling down his face.

He left the apartment and went back to his. "Where did he go?" Spencer asked. "He went back to his apartment." Carly said. He lived in their old apartment but even Spencer didn't know that Marissa had passed. "Where is that? With Marissa?" Elaina asked. "Sort of." Carly responded. "What do you mean sort of kiddo?" Spencer asked. "Ok Spencer sit" he and Elaina both took a seat on the couch. "Marissa passed a few months ago. He didn't tell anyone because he was upset at her everything that has happened the last few years with him and his amnesia. I found out about things from Marissa when I came back for that girls weekend. It has been a rollercoaster ever since. But it is Freddie for sure, it is unbelievable but it is. But he is sort of broken too. He has tried to kill himself literally with everything that has happened. That is the scars on his arms. He is broken and now I am afraid that the one thing he was driving towards may have broken his heart too." Carly said.

It was about five o-clock and I knew that Melanie was serious about talking with me later this evening but I didn't know what to talk about I didn't know how to explain it. Would she even believe me? There was one thing for sure it has been long enough I need to read the letter. I should know what he said. I went to the dresser and grabbed the letter which was quite wrinkled now, and I opened it. I took a deep breath and unfolded the pages and looked at the writing. I am going to read this and no matter what I will finish it.

Sam,

Let me start by answering an official question of the game. Where do I see this going? I love you and I always have you are my everything and I want you to know that. You said I talk about this past love like she is still there and that is because the past love is you Sam. I know that you are confused now but let me explain.

Sam to answer another question my last name, it is Benson. But my first name well that is a long story, I was born Fredward Benson, but to most people called me Freddie. To you I was called by a number of things Frederly, Nub, Fred-o, Diphthong, Fredamame, which was one of my personal favorites. And for a long time, you called me baby. I loved every single one of the names you came up for me. But I am getting off track. Yes I am Freddie Benson, and I owe you an explanation.

The worst thing is that we left things sort of on an argument. It was an April a few years ago. I had come home I was more excited than anything in the world I had some plans already in motion. I sold my technology I had been working on for a few years to Pear and they hired me on full time. I was ready to start the next step in my life with you. I came in and there you were with a contract. I am sure you remember the other stuff but when you left I was broken. I have never felt the way before and to make things worse I had a home with no one to share it with. I had a plan that included two but it was now only for one. Four years later I decided to go to you finally with hopes to do what I had planned to do all those years ago. But that is when it happened. I was in the hotel and I was shot. I was dead for almost twenty minutes. And no one knows why I choose this name but when I came back I said my name was Marcus.

I had dreams that I couldn't figure out and I had no one to help me. I tried but even my mother wouldn't tell me who I was. I tried to kill myself. This is the first time I have talked about the experience of what happened that night. I was sitting in a hotel room after having another one of the dreams with people and places I didn't understand. I sat there the room was dark I grabbed the knife I was using for dinner and I began to slice from wrist to elbow. First on my left arm then again on my right, I laid down leaning on the bed prepared for what was going to happen. I didn't want to live anymore I didn't have anything to live for.

I slipped again and this time the voice that some people talk about was there. It spoke to me, it told me that my life was not over yet and that I was not supposed to go yet. He would not take me because there was still more for me to do, and there was someone who needed me more than I could understand right now. I begged him to help me to take me I told him I didn't want to live any more I couldn't go on. He said that soon everything would start going back to normal and that my purpose would be clear. I would help millions and through my pain I could heal many other lives. He said it was time for me to go back and just then Bam I was in a hospital surgery table with doctors scrambling to save me. I was saved.

But more importantly there was one last thing he said to me. He said don't give up and don't give in you are on a journey that was started years ago, and this is just one of the many downs along the way. You will remember and the most important thing is you were never meant to take the journey alone. As I started to remember who I was and who everyone else was after the cruise I realized what he meant.

This is a lot to take in and I know that you still may not believe me but Sam it is all true and it is something that at first I myself couldn't really comprehend but every single choice I have made over the last 6 years somehow has either been because of you or has been for you. I bought the house because of that summer together right before college started when you said you wanted to live in a house by the beach. I worked like crazy to get my technology and got a huge job at Pear because, Mama doesn't like to work, and I would never let you do anything you didn't like. I started hanging out with music stars and I guess that is because I was trying to get closer to you. I even own a Ham company that I didn't even really know why I had to buy it but I did. And when Fatcakes Company was finally publicly traded I purchased into the company and now am 43% owner of it as the largest individual owner of the company. Who knew why I did those things. Now I do

I need to ask you, Sam can you forgive me? I left you and I had made a promise to never leave you alone on the journey you would be taking. And the worst part is that it wasn't when I was shot it was four years earlier I should have chased after you I should have told you I loved you and would go with you. The thing was I couldn't then I was angry because things were also happening for me but I hadn't told you about them yet. And I wanted you to have your dream I knew if I told you about what was happening to me you would not have left. You would have stayed and I didn't want you to not have your dream too. But there was something I should have done all those years ago, that very night when you left.

Sam there is a code on the computer you have 492015 it is a date April 9th 2015 that would have been 4 years to the day that you kissed me in the lock in and that was the date I had planned the biggest question of my life. So I will make it an official question and the last one of the game. When you want to know it if you are ready for it ask me to ask you and I will. And remember you are out of passes so you would have to answer it.

I love you I always have and I always will.

Freddie Benson

I grabbed a duffle bag and filled it with as much cloths as I could and I left. I didn't know where I was going. But I needed to go.

It had been a week, and I was just getting to Seattle I was going to talk to Carly it had been almost a month since we spoke. I was outside of Bushwell and looked at the building making my way up I actually took the stairs. I stood on the 8th floor and finally knocked on door. And just then The apartment door behind me opened. "Sam" Freddie said.

Oh god this is not something I was prepared for.

Chapter end.

A/N I am leaving this short who liked IDS&F I really like where they are going with it. I will try and update the next chapter sooner I am half way done with it and realized I didn't post this one. so enjoy the story and please review.

GUESS WHO IS COMING BACK NEXT CHAPTER? Get it right and get a virtual prize….lol