Hello all. Wow. We're so close to the end… how sad. Anyways, thanks for your loyal reading. Review or I will send Kira to your house to steal your underwear.

Chapter 21: What to steal, what to steal…

Heya kids. It's everyone's favorite Thief Princess, Kira! What! You don't know who I am? FOOLISH MORTALS! I WILL REIN SOME DOOM UPON THE FILTHY, DOOMED HEADS OF THE DOOMED INHABITANTS OF YOUR DOOMED PLANET! Nah, I'm just kidding. Of course you know who I am.

Anyways, here's the deal. Mom and Dad, as well as a couple of Mom's friends, are getting married. But I'm tight on cash.

(Not really, but I'm stingy, and I'm trying to save up for the PS5. So I really can't spare too much cash)

So what's a girl to do? I could get a job… ha. Not likely. I'm too lazy. I could make some crap present out of toothpicks and glue… once again, I'm too lazy. So all the choices I have are too… that's right cheat some poor, defenseless museum out of their priceless artifacts. While I'm at it, I may as well pick up something for Tsuki and Kyo too.

What museum can I go to? The Aoi museum of Art is too easy, the Museum of natural history I've hit too many times, Domino is too far… I got it! There's a museum that opened at M art school in Aoi. It's supposed to have a collection of some really cool stuff.

So now I have to scope the place out. La la… See ya, I'm gonna go check it out.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I just got back, and I couldn't dream of a more perfect set up. They have a bunch of up tight guards, and those are always the most fun to mess with. I have to smile at their oafishness. I have all the exits and entrances memorized, as well as the location of all the windows and sky lights. This is the perfect gig.

I'm so proud of myself. I wonder if I should send a note. Dad says that's vulgar, but they might give me someone fun to play with for once (smile). I don't think I will though. I have everything picked out. For Jin and Tsuki there's an amazing statue of a moon goddess holding a sapphire the size of a walnut. She's really pretty and smiling gently. For Kyo I'm getting the companion piece, a gold statue holding a ruby, shaped like a sun goddess. They're both about two feet high. I think they're pretty.

For Mom and Dad, though, I'm getting a sword that looks a bit like Alistair from Devil May Cry. Mom's been moaning some drivel about forsaking Dante, and this will shut her up. I hope. Any who, I'm ready to go. I'll go in a week from now.

Ha. Stupid police. They won't know what hit them. Now it's time for my evil laugh. Eh hem… BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I'm done with laughing now…

This is Kira, signing off…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ooh, I HATE YOU KISA! She found out about my escapade and she sent a note! I HATE HER! Now they're gonna send in some big scary guy and give him an unfair advantage! Oh well. At least he might prove to be fun…

I'm going to sulk now…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Okay, I've got everything planned. I'm going to the museum tonight. Wish me luck! Chu!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

HA! FOOLISH MORTALS! Even though Kisa sent that note ahead of time, there isn't anyone special here! HA! I win! This is gonna be easy!

Crap. I was wrong. They hired him… that slick little censored for the sake of children. Ooh… I hate him! He used to be a famous thief, and he betrayed his partners and went over to the side of the police! GRR! I hate him! His name is Tenkuro. Let's just sidle out of his point o' view… CRAP!

Heya, Tenkuro-kun! Howya doing? I'm just on the way to the potty…

CRAP! He didn't fall for my ace ( that's your ace, Kira?). Alright, Let's whup some traitor ass! HA!

Hey, he's pretty good ! Take that! And a little of that! HA! This is fun!

OH MY GOD, YOU SICKO PERVERT! He looked up my skirt! I'm gonna KILL him! GRR! Hya! HA! SORA KICK! (from a parody of /.hack I saw recently… don't ask)

This guy's pretty good. I don't mind though. It's been a while since I've had a good challenge evil grin . I'm gonna work off all my flab, tra la la. Beat that fucker! HYA! KARATE CHOP! NINJA CENTERFOLD! Guess what! That's right: I have asplody things! (She means bombs. Isn't that illegal in Japan?). Huh? He dodged? Bastard!

I hate him! GRR! Oh well, I'm going to have to use the POKE OF DOOM!

Just kidding. I put a nifty little nerve control thing that Kisa gave me on his neck when he looked up my skirt. It knocked him out five minutes ago. I've just been narrating for your entertainment. So anyways, I ought to get the stuff before the cops show.

La. Aright, the statues are the Sculpture Garden and the sword is in the Exhibition hall. This is Kira, signing off.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Well, I'm done. This ended up being a fairly easy gig. WHEE! I haven't had so much fun in a while. So I nabbed the sword and the statues, and as I came out I saw Tenkuro still laying there, unconscious. So, what would you do? TAKE HIM HOME! Duh. He's been living in my closet for a week now. I think I'll give him to someone else. He's too old for me. Maybe I should sell him on EBAY. Or maybe I should sell his sperm to desperate, lonely fan girls.

Anyways, the moral of this story is… that's right…

I don't care who you are, or how good you think you may be;

I will not only kick your ass, I will fry it and serve it to you on a silver platter.

Smell ya later! Ja'ne.