AN: Ladies and Gents, the moment you've been waiting for, The return of Reylo affection!
"Now, I wouldn't worry too much about it if I were you. Of course, we don't have access to any of your former records, but from what we have heard from you, we can surmise that you were quite underweight before your pregnancy, and I gather you've been under some stress recently. Both of those things on their own have been known to cause early labour." Eloriah explains. "I'd like to be able to do an ultrasound, but that sort of equipment isn't kept here. I've sent for it, though, since Master Ren assured us you'd be staying here for the duration of the pregnancy."
"An ultrasound?" Rey asks.
"Oh, yes. It's a machine that allows you to see into the womb, get proper measurements on the baby, even determine the gender and hear the heartbeat."
"Hear the heartbeat?" Rey asks, the corners of her lips twitching up.
"Yes- have you not heard it yet?"
"I was...rather on my own, for the first half of this. And the people where I was for the rest of it didn't exactly have the means for fancy equipment for expectant mothers." Rey explains.
"Then you're in for a treat when the machine gets here."
"I was wondering- has Kylo- er, Master Ren, has he been here this morning?" Rey asks curiously. He'd closed the bond entirely at some point while she had been sleeping, and she assumes that's where her dreams had turned into nightmares. She'd considered gently prodding against the barriers, seeing if he'd let her in, but she'd thought better of it.
"No, He's not been in the med bay since last night, but he did see that everything was arranged for you before he went to-" Eloriah cuts herself off, and busies herself again.
"Went where?" Rey asks, leaning forward to take her hand. "Tell me, please."
"Well, I don't know exactly, but we think he went to go see...the Supreme leader, in person." Eloriah explains, and Rey's heart almost literally skips a beat.
"W-what? Where?"
"I'm afraid I really don't know, Rey. Last night General Hux came to the Med Bay and they got into...a disagreement. The general said they would prepare a cell, and Master Ren said he'd have you in his quarters, and the General told him that he'd already informed the SUpreme Leader of the situation, and Master Ren didn't seem pleased. He said he was going to go there himself...then he threw the General into a wall and was off. He's posted some of his loyal guards outside your room, so no one will be allowed in without permission."
"How long ago did he leave?" She asks.
"It was after you'd fallen asleep. I'd guess he's been gone for no less than six hours, no more than eight." Eloriah explains. "If Master Ren were here, I'd probably release you this morning, but given the circumstances, I think you'll be much more comfortable here than a cell."
"No doubt." Rey nods. "Thank you, for being so kind...and I apologize, for er...Master Ren's behaviour. He's quite impulsive."
"Oh, you don't have to apologize, Rey. And it's no trouble to be kind. I may be on the first order's employ, but my first devotion is to expecting mothers and babies, like my mother before me." Eloriah shrugs as she finishes up some notes. "As far as I'm concerned, a woman who loves her child enough to risk being brought on board a ship full of people who may well kill her...well, she deserves a bit of friendship, doesn't she?"
"Thank you." Rey smiles.
"Alright. I'll be back again in about an hour, and if things are still safe, I'll have some food brought in for you. Just relax, sleep if you want to...and I'll keep you informed, if there's any word on Master Ren's location." She says as she leaves the room. The baby kicks against her pelvis, and she squirms a bit.
"You're awake, aren't you, my sweet one? I was beginning to worry, after all, we had an...exciting day yesterday, to say the least." Rey coos softly to the child protected by layers of skin and muscle. "But where is your father? Hm? I know, how would you know?"
"You referred to me as their father." Rey gasps, completely taken aback to by the sound of his voice in her head. She'd never closed the bond again, she'd been waiting for him.
"Where are you? Are you alright?" She asks at once, and she's sure her heart rate has increased again.
"I'm fine. I'm on the way back to you."
"Where did you go?"
"I'll tell you when I'm back."
"Why can't you tell me now?"
"I'd rather be with you."
"Why? Is it...do you have something I won't like to hear?" She asks, biting her lip nervously.
"No, don't worry. I just...I'm tired. I'll be with you in less than an hour. Can you just wait?"
"It doesn't sound like I have a choice." She sighs. "I...I was worried about you."
"You were?" He seems genuinely surprised.
"You were so upset last night, and you left so suddenly...and I heard that you'd argued, with General Hux?"
"Who told you that?" he asks angrily. "Was it that nurse?"
"Her name is Eloriah, and I like her. I want her to deliver the baby, so you'd better not frighten her off." Rey cautions. "Yes, she told me. I asked. You closed the bond last night, I could barely feel you. I was worried about you."
"You close the bond on me all of the time."
"That was before." She insists.
"What? Are you going to keep it open?"
"If you don't do anything that makes me need to get away." She can feels sparks of excitement run through him at the idea of constant connection. Suddenly, she'd like to have him in her arms, or at least in front of her. "Did you go to see Snoke? Please, tell me the truth."
"I did." She's silent. All she can remember is the last time that she had known he was with Snoke, when he had been hurt so badly… "What is it?"
"The last time...The last time I found out that you'd been to see Snoke, you were hurt. Very badly." The memory sparks through them both, painful and sharp.
"I'm fine."
"You sound upset."
"I don't like that you had to feel that pain. You didn't deserve it."
"You didn't deserve it either!"
"Maybe not."
"...You'll be here soon?"
"I promise.""Okay.""Please, don't worry about me. I can feel it coming off of you in waves."
"I can't help that."
"It's been a long time, since someone was worried about me." He observes softly.
"That's not true. Your mother thinks of you constantly."
"Do not mention that woman to me!"
"I'm only telling you the truth. You're never far from her thoughts. She's told me all sorts of stories about you, about your childhood. She made me feel...closer to you."
"She doesn't know me."
"Maybe not anymore. But she knew the child that you were. And as the woman carrying your child, that was of interest to me."
"I like it, when you call it my child. Most of the time you call it yours."
"Well, it is ours. No point in hiding it anymore."
"Ours." His voice is warm and she feels it wash over her like a warm rain. "I almost don't believe it. There was so much light...so much light…"
"I know. Master Luke was surprised too. We both thought there would be darkness, but there wasn't- there isn't. And it came from you too."
"There is no light in me!" He huffs, immediately on the defensive.
"No, of course not." She shakes her head and fights to keep from rolling her eyes. "I don't want to fight with you. I'm too tired for that. I'll talk to you when you come back."
"Fine."
"I'll...keep the bond open, if you'd like." She says, almost timidly.
"I would." He says cautiously.
"Alright." She's almost lulled to sleep by the rhythm of his beating heart, which she feels throughout her entire body. She shouldn't be so comfortable with him, with his volatile temper and tendency to act violently and swiftly. But somehow, she feels that he fills the cracks and holes inside of her, making her whole in a way she doesn't know that she has ever been before...and she wonders if he feels it too.
"Yes." It's such a quiet whisper, she's not sure he's really said it, but she doesn't press. She just closes her eyes, and lets herself get lost in the seas of him. She's safe as long as she is with him. He might hurt everyone else, but he'd let her go...he'd been so gentle...he could take whatever he wanted, but he did not take her against her will. He claimed to love her...and in quiet moments like this, with no words, just feelings, she could almost believe that was true.
She knows when he lands in the Hangar, she feels it in her whole body. She can't help herself when she tries to arrange her hair in some semblance of order, and adjust her bland gray hospital gown nicely. She shouldn't want to look nice for him, but she finds that she does. The closer he gets, the stronger the pulsing of the bond becomes, and when he's just outside of her door, she almost can't remember how to breathe.
The first thing she thinks when she sees him is that she's so glad that he doesn't wear his mask anymore. His face is so handsome, she can't think of any reason he should cover it up. The second is that he still radiates pain.
"Oh Ben…" She breathes, swinging her feet over the side of the bed to attempt to rise and go to him.
"No- don't. I don't want you to hurt yourself." He says, coming to her bedside instead. He sinks to his knees before her, and she gently puts her hands on his face, feeling through his body to find the source of his pain...in his hands. Her face puckers as her hands gently trail down his neck and his arms until they reach his glove covered hands. Carefully, ever so carefully, she peels them off, keeping her eyes fixed on his until she's freed his fingers from them.
"Ben...Kylo…" She says gently as she takes in the damage to his palms. Red, angry skin, radiating pain. "You lied to me- you said you weren't hurt. You said you were fine."
"I am." He says, but she has evidence to the contrary in her hands. "Don't worry."
"Don't worry? I don't understand...How did I not feel this?" She asks, her brow furrowing as she runs her fingers along the very edge of his hands.
"I closed the bond. I did everything I could to keep it shut tight. I didn't want you to feel anything." He says. She closes her eyes, and lets out a long breath. "I'm glad...I wasn't sure it would work. But you didn't feel anything?"
"No. I didn't." She gently runs her fingers over the backs of his hands, where there was no damage, and she feels him tremble. She breathes in deeply. "What happened?"
"He tried to hit me with the lightning. I caught it." He shrugs. "I'll just stick them in some bacta. They'll be fine." He tries to pull back, but she holds fast to his hands.
"I'm going to try something. Prove that you trust me." She says softly, and he nods slowly. She'd done this a few times before. Luke had taught her how, but Leia had really been the one to help her get the hang of Force healing. She'd been able to repair minor cuts and even a few broken bones, why couldn't she do this? She breathes in, focusing all of her energy, all of the force flowing through her into his hands, which are surrounded by a soft, blue light. His breath is trembling, his eyes are squeezed shut, but he doesn't pull away from her, and her lips curl into a smile. "There we are, please, trust me...trust me…" She soothes through the bond, and gently peels away her healing light, leaving unmarred skin in it's wake. To finish it, she gently kisses his palms, and then looks into his dark eyes.
"I can't remember the last time someone healed me." He says quietly. "Someone who didn't have to. And most of the time I use the med droids."
"I...I don't like to see you hurting, and I could stop it." She shrugs.
"Your force abilities have grown." He says, still holding her eyes.
"They have...this is my favorite thing." She says, running her thumbs over his palms without fear of causing him pain. "I'm tired of fighting. Of death and destruction. I don't want to use the force for those things, if I don't have to. But I can use it to heal."
"It was...incredible. You were incredible." He says, gently touching her cheek. A thought strikes her, and she catches his hand gently, holding it to her skin.
"After we left yesterday...what happened on Hoth?" She asks, and he stiffens. "Please. I have to know."
"You'll be glad to hear it was a failure. A majority of the rebels have escaped." She tries not to smile or sigh in relief. "We didn't manage to dispose of anyone of note. It's my fault. I was supposed to lead...I failed."
"Don't…" She protests with a shake of her head. "Is that why he wanted to hurt you?"
"He wanted to know if the report from Hux was accurate. If I'd brought in a pregnant prisoner." Kylo says, his fingers pressing gently to the skin of her cheek. "I had to tell him it was mine. He would have known, eventually...He...asked how the child had come to exist. He thinks that I...I… on you. Did I?" He asks, sounding troubled.
"No, no Ben, No!" She says quickly, reaching for him clasping his face in her hands. "You made love to me- don't you remember?" She asks desperately. He looks at her with narrowed eyes, and she reaches into his mind. The memory on starkiller is clouded with darkness, tampered with, an edge of violence and darkness on every movement. The memories seem black, like they're rotting, stolen from him. She's recognizes the look of tampered memories from the memories of his childhood. And Snoke's done it again. He's taken something precious, something that Ben should have been able to hold dear, and he's used it to make the darkness grow. She trembles with rage, and he begins to back away.
"I'm so sorry. I never thought...I'm a monster." His eyes fill with horror and disgust.
"No- Ben! It wasn't that way! He's gotten into your head, he's made you think..." She shakes her head in disgust, and pulls him closer again. "You know that's not right, don't you? You remember…" She rakes her fingers through his hair, and he stares at her in confusion. She takes a deep breath, and pushes down the feelings of embarrassment to let him into her most private memories, reminding herself that they belong to him too. She floods his mind with her memories of their moment.
Soft lips against skin, his hot breath tickling her breasts while she begged him for more, begged him to touch her, to fill her, to complete her. Her lips on the juncture between his shoulder and his throat, nipping at the skin, making him growl in pleasure. His large hands completely engulfing her breasts, teasing, massaging, worshipping...His lips on hers, next to her ear, whispering reassurances in her ear as she'd writhed beneath him until the slight pain had abated. When he'd moved the first time, making her moan and rake her nails across his back, moving inside of her until she was screaming, screaming his name, begging him, swallowing his moans in her throat…
She stops her flow of memories, and opens her eyes, meeting his, dark with lust. His hands are clutching desperately at her wrists, like he so wants to believe what she's shown him.
"That. That was how it was that night. This baby doesn't exist because of violence; it may not have been conceived in love, but it wasn't in hatred, or violence. I wanted you."
"No one could want me." He shakes his head. She growls in frustration, and pulls his face to hers, her lips meeting his and capturing them. He's frozen for a moment, and she pulls away, meeting his eyes again.
"You said that you trusted me. Do you?" She asks. "Because you have no idea how much I want you- even when I was furiously angry with you, I wanted you more than I could bear it!" He kisses her then, fiercely, and she hums into his mouth. This kiss is passion, possessiveness, absolute desire. It pulses through every fiber of her body, and the bond is singing as his hands make contact with her breasts, so swollen and sensitive, making her gasp against his mouth. He smiles, and trails his mouth down after his hands, almost ripping the hospital gown from her body as his mouth locks onto her flesh, and she almost screams it's so good. "Oh Maker! Kylo- Ben!" She hisses throwing her head back. Yes, for weeks of her pregnancy on end she'd felt an insatiable need for this sort of closeness, and no one else's kisses, no one else's hands could ever have felt as good as his did.
"Say it again." He whispers into her flesh, and she arches her back as he dares to trail one of his hands lower.
"Yes- I want you! Oh maker! I want you, only you, only ever you!" She groans, and he kisses her on the lips again. She feels waves of elation and pride coming off of him, followed by possessiveness and desire. "If you stop for any reason, I will never forgive you!" He growls, and pulls her body closer to his, his large hands tracing over the expanse of her stomach and down over her hips to the supple skin of her back and down...down...Her hands can't move fast enough to pull his clothes away from his body, desperate for more. More of him, to taste, to touch, to feel moving against her own flesh. Gone are any thoughts of hesitation, or the fact that she should not be doing this, or embarrassment about her changed body. All there is is him. Him and what his hands are doing to her body. Her breasts brush against his newly bared chest, and he moans into her throat, increasing her pleasure more than she had dreamed possible. She hears the door start to open, and she panics until his hand flies up and it absolutely slams shut, and she can think of no better use of the force.
She pushes him back, and climbs over his lap, his desire for her evident through his dark clothing. He lets her take control, so much differently than the last time, but he uses his hands to bring her pleasure until she's sobbing against his shoulder, and then finally, finally, he enters her body, and she feels nothing except the wholeness, and the delicious, absolute harmony that is being one with him. The bond hums, and seems to surround them in light.
"I love you." He says quietly as he gently bites into her breast, just where he knew it would drive her absolutely mad with pleasure and desire. "Do you believe me?" She can only nod, and let out a quiet whimper as her second release builds and flows through her, leading him to his own extreme pleasure. She collapses against his chest, and he kisses her hair, her ear, her temple, everything he can reach. Her breathing slowly returns to normal, and she twists her body so she can rest her hands on his face again.
"You know it wasn't real- what it showed you, it wasn't really what happened. This…" She rolls her hips against his, and he sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth. "Is what happened. You and I...when we're near each other, something happens. I need you, and you need me. No one hurts each other. No one takes. We only give. Do you believe me?"
"Yes." He whispers, kissing her lips softly. "I won't ever hurt you."
"I know." She smiles at him, and disentangles herself from him to find the clothes she'd come in. They'd be laundered in the night, and she dressed herself in them instead of the hospital gown.
"I asked the nurse to send for some clothes for you." He says, and she's surprised by his thoughtfulness.
"Thank you." She half smiles at him...he can be so kind...but only to her. It's troubling, but if such kindness can come from him, he can surely extend it to others.
"I've prepared a space for you, in my quarters. I...wanted you near to me." He explains, and she feels his eyes boring into her back. "Do you mind?"
"No. That's fine." She nods. "I really, I don't mind, being close to you." Heat floods her face, and she's afraid he'll see it, and comment, but he doesn't. When she turns back around to face him, he's fully dressed, and in perfect order, as if nothing had happened between them. She catches a glimpse of her reflection in the cold metal wall, her hair is completely wild, and her lips are swollen from his kiss. How can he possibly look so good?
"Do you know that you're the most stunning creature I've ever seen?" He asks, coming up to her and putting his still ungloved hands on her face. Her breath hitches in her throat, and she can't understand how his very presence can make her feel this way.
"I'm nothing." She shakes her head. "Nothing special."
"Not to me." He insists, resting his forehead against hers. She pulls back, and grabs tightly onto his shirt.
"What else did Snoke say? He hurt you...He made you think that you were a monster…But what else did he say?"
"I'm allowed to keep you-" He snaps off and grimances. "I'm sorry. That sounded...harsh. He...he wants you to be kept here." her eyes narrow.
"He wants another Skywalker." Her hands tighten their grip. "And you...you're going to deliver it to him?"
"The child is yours." He insists.
"Until it's old enough to be trained to be a monster?" She asks, letting go suddenly and backing away.
"Like me." He finishes her unspoken statement.
"I don't want that." She shakes her head. "I don't want a child who grows up to fight and kill and hate...someone who could be so lost to the darkness that they would willingly kill their own father!"
"Why not? It would be easier for you if I were gone. It would be easier for everyone."
"How can the darkness be back already?!" She growls, throwing her hands in the air. "We've shared something so...beautiful- and you think I don't need you? Shouldn't our bond be proof enough that we need each other? You've told me so many times that we are made for each other- Maker, we created a life together- how much more proof do you need?"
"I don't know...when I touch you…" He lifts his hands, and caresses her cheek. "Everything is so clear...it's so bright...My head is clear. All I can think of is you...and this…" His hand trails to her stomach again.
"Do you want the baby to be owned by your master?" She asks, keeping his hand trapped on her stomach. He looks down into her eyes.
"No. No one owns this child except for you."
"Not you?" She asks, leaning her head to the side in question.
"I want the child completely unsullied by me." He shakes his head.
"Have you sullied me?" She asks.
"What? Of course not...nothing could ruin you. Nothing. You're perfect."
"Then you won't ruin the child. I know that." She insists.
"I...don't know any more."
"Well, I do."