A/N: Expansion of the moon thing at the beginning of "The Pact." Rampant speculation; written because no way does someone lose their memory and stay completely calm about it. No, Hyou-chan, not even you. And with that, I am done posting for the week at least. Got to pay real life its due, dontcha know. The next chapter, if all goes according to plan, will be a long one. For now, enjoy my ramblings.
It was daylight, when he first fully realized that he couldn't remember. Someone – he never noticed who it was – asked, "So, who are you?" And though he knew that he was zanpakuto and must have a master somewhere, he found he could attach neither a face nor a name to the title. And just as he thought that it might not be so bad, to forget the person he'd been separated from, he felt his own identity, his own name, slip away from him.
So he ran. He ran, hoping that some leftover instinct would guide him back to his lost identity. Though outwardly he kept his stoic demeanor – it must have been schooled into him, he decided, and found comfort in the thought that he still retained something – he was frantic, terrified of the dark place where his memories should be but where instead there was only total, swirling nothingness.
What, exactly, drew his eyes to the moon that night he could not have said. He stopped his wandering journey to stare silently, captivated by its cool silver light, and the empty panic in his heart began to fade, just a little bit.
The moonlight on his face was comforting. It was … familiar. If he stood still and looked long enough he felt an obscure peace steal over him, as though he knew, after all, who he was. He knew a cold, muted world like this; on the air he heard the remembered echo of a voice, calling to him – Who are you? And, unthinking, he drew a breath to answer –
But there was always some stray sound, or movement, or simply some turn of his own mind, to shock him out of his trance. And when he reached for the answers that been almost within his grasp, he found only empty, empty space. He remained nameless, homeless, and the moon shone down on him like the eye of some cold, unfeeling god.
Who am I?
Where do I belong?
If his deity heard, it only shone on unresponsively, and kept its secrets.