even I still call Malphas Sebastian sometimes... I almost wrote Sebastian instead every time his name appears in this chapter... all 33 times

He looked around. He was in no definitive place. But around him, in a line, were lights, beautiful orbs of indiscernible color. He knew they were memories, well he assumed they were memories, but he couldn't tell what they were about. Not exactly. But there were feelings he got from them. Actually, just one. Fear. All of them reverberated with fear. Cautiously the boy reached towards one.

He was crawling along the ground again. But quickly. He was being pursued. The need to survive kept him moving. He turned quickly, escaping into an underground burrow. Ciel allowed himself to relax, even though Snake-Beast had not. They'd escaped, right? But suddenly something was clawing at the entrance of the burrow and snarling, teeth occasionally snapping, trying to get at its prey. Eventually the predator got distracted and left. The memory concluded with Snake-Beast leaving the hole.

Back in that memory plane, Ciel began to search through the memories. Being hunted. Escaping. The fear of not finding food in its usual spot. Lack of water. All fears related to survival. As the fledgling ran his hand along the orbs, he noticed the common thread. But then the thread disconnected; something was different. New feelings began to emerge. Hunger and thirst, and the need and desire to hunt. Finding shelter, fighting for territory. Searching for...

"Searching for a mate..." He'd finally recognized it. That uncomfortable heat. That strange haze. He felt so stupid, "Of course... Lust is a basic urge after all. No surprise there ARE memories related to it..." But it got him thinking. These instinct-based feelings were the main themes of these memories. He was in his wild state now... but did taming himself change the results? Or completely disconnect him? Tame.

It was like a rug was yanked out from underneath him. The world shifted and he was right back in the memory scape. Was this what would happen now? Or did this only happen because he had no memory in mind? Were his powers so fluid that he could shift between seeing one memory and having the option to view them all? He frowned and returned to the leather armchair.

"Something is changing... I can feel it. I'm shifting." He settled into the chair, his frown twisting into a grimace. A feeling suddenly came over him, an overwhelming nausea. He bolted from the trophy room to his bedroom, but it was like moving through molasses. He was suddenly sluggish and heavy. Where did his speed go? He was running at a terribly... human pace. He couldn't make it to his own bathroom, so he dived into the one in the hall. He scrambled to the toilet, flinging the lid up. His body convulsed painfully as he vomited violently into the bowl. The more he heaved the more horrified he became. His own trembling increased as he stared, transfixed on the new contents of the toilet. The taste left in his mouth was peculiar. It was... somewhat pleasant. It bubbled and burped as if part of it was alive but the smell was revolting; that of a rotting corpse. It looked even worse. Like he'd quite literally regurgitated his stomach, and maybe a few other organs.

Ciel heard footsteps coming up the stairs. Malphas... That fiend had most definitely heard him. Ciel didn't want him to see it. He didn't want him to know what was happening. He could not let him know. This was bad, a very bad development. He'd just been the most independent he'd ever been without fucking everything up. Malphas was not going to come into it now.

"Ciel... Ciel, are you alright?"

The boy went to respond, but another wave of nausea hit. I'm fine! I'm fine! Go away! Shoo, you irritating raven. Ciel could feel an air of peace begin to grow in the bathroom. He found his body relaxing of its own will. What is this? It quickly began grow, and the blunette's desire for his mentor to flock off grew with it. I said... GO AWAY!

Immediately, the fledgling could hear his mentor walk back down the stairs. Ciel stared owlishly at the door, each slow blink bringing him closer to the realization that... "Hey... that peaceful feeling didn't go away." The demon frowned and looked around him. At first nothing looked different. But then he noticed a slight shimmering all around him, as if he were looking through mildly warped glass. He frowned and stood up, the nausea having passed as suddenly as it had come. He strolled out of the bathroom and his nose was immediately attacked by what he could almost certainly say was now his least favorite scent. He could feel his anger being suppressed and scowled at what he was assuming was a shield of some sort. He glanced over the railing and saw that Malphas was sitting on the couch, looking oddly disheveled.

"Malphas."

The elder looked up and immediately frowned, "Little One, what is that?"

"What is what?"

"That... thing you are projecting."

So he was the one doing it... "Don't worry about it." The boy turned abruptly away from the railing and walked to the game lounge. He ran his hand along the pool table... Nothing. This had something to do with his different states. Wild. He was back in the memory plane. Lustful memories lined up before him. No thanks. He lifted his hand and turned away from the table. There was something he was missing... Now in his wild state, that... shield was gone. So it was a tame ability.

"What else could I be missing? The difference between the two is my feelings towards others and my own desires..." Or so he thought. This new ability implied there was another dif- "Of course!" he shouted, and began to pace around the lounge. Now he had the other piece! The other side of it. Defense vs offense. That's why he was able to hear thoughts tame, but search through them when wild. And if Tame!Ciel had a shield, a defensive ability... the Wild!Ciel had to have some sort of attack, since it seemed like the two sides were balancing each other out. The blunette snapped, "Passive and Active! Tamed emotions and wild emotions, passive abilities and active abilities. I think I've got it figured out... And I've done illusions before... but in both states." His excitement dulled as he realized it. He hadn't wanted to be alone when he was in town and had unknowingly created the illusion of himself in front of the twins. In the forest with Malphas... he'd wanted to trap his mentor, so he'd unknowingly made the trees seem impassable. But the nature of the illusions were different... well the intentions behind them were different.

"Okay, so we've established the passive and active abilities and tame and wild emotions. The illusions fit somewhere in between those two categories... They were passive at the time, and also connected to my desires. Maybe... they're a Red ability?" Blue and Red, better than tame and wild, though he did like the latter terms. But the former covered more bases, so to possibly reach his full potential he figured he'd need to switch the trigger words to something more all encompassing.

Tame. Blue. Wild. Red. Tame, blue. Wild, red. Blue, tame, blue, tame, blue. Red, wild, red, wild, red. Blue, tame, blue blue. Red, wild, red red. Blueblueblueblue. Redredredred.

His head hurt as he forced new meaning into those two words. He could feel himself rapidly switching between the two states, and it was during this process that he realized something was wrong. He smelled blood. He was about to sprint out of the room... but he realized it was coming from him. He could taste it, it was dripping from his mouth. Blue. Stay away, Malphas! You don't smell anything!

He felt his shield go up, that sense of peace flooding over him. It was probably caused by his body knowing the shield would protect him... Either way he was still panicking on the inside. Something was wrong with his body.

At first he thought that the demon and human sides were attacking each other. However, as he thought about it more, he realized that that wasn't the case. No... the more he stood as his demonic self, the more he understood what was really happening.

Red. The shield fell away. The blood flow increased, dripping from his nose as well.

I'm attacking myself... His demonic side was eating away at his human body. Ciel was instantly frozen in terror. He was rotting away. That would explain the sudden human slowness. His physical body was weighing him down. He'd been doing something to ignore the weight of it during training, but now that he was forcefully awakening his demonic self... The power contained by that self was being restricted by his human form.

"Perhaps... that is why I don't have much of a 'magik' presence. This body is restricting those abilities."

But what was going to happen when his body was completely destroyed. What sort of form would he have then? What sort of being would he be? And what was going to happen to his blue abilities? He needed to see Leviatha.

"Malphas!" Ciel sprinted downstairs, stumbling as he was instantly aware of how much his human body was weighing him down. He felt vulnerable and weak. His sprint was hardly any faster than an actual human sprint. He was worried about staying in his red state, worried that rushing around as he was would speed up the destruction of his body. Blue. The weight lifted. So... his demon self rejected the body, but the human part still embraced it... This was going to be troublesome. He was able to move more quickly in this form, but it was still too close to a human pace.

He tripped over the bottom step, but caught himself and jumped up, "Malphas!" The elder glanced over and a look of fury instantly darkening his previously contemplative expression.

"Ciel?! What happened!" The raven's eyes darted around the house and his nostrils flared. Ciel could even see his hair rising slightly as the duke attempted to find

Dammit, calm down! He'll smell traces of Viper at this rate. Malphas, calm down. The shield rose, and Ciel could see the fury fall away as the raven seemed to be unable to find any trace of a threat. He noticed part of his mind making note of that for later evaluation. The blunette sighed, "I need you to take me to Leviatha."

"Why? What's wrong?" Malphas stepped towards the boy, under the shield, and Ciel was worried that he would be able to smell the snake demon's scent on him, but the effect of the shield seemed to stick.

"I just need to talk to her but..." Fuck... excuse... "I don't want to go alone." It wasn't a lie. He was worried about further developments occurring while he was stranded and vulnerable.

Malphas chuckled, "Well, I suppose. I am no longer busy. But do tell me why you are covered in blood." There was gravel in his tone, and Ciel could tell that shield did nothing to lessen his anger.

"I was training."

"Upstairs?"

"Yes."

"What sort of training?"

"Clairvoyant training."

"And now you are bleeding?"

"I was. I'm not in any sort of pain or anything. Could we please hurry?" He didn't know if he had a time limit before the next major development.

"Hmph." Malphas seemed unconvinced, but the boy couldn't lie, so he let it drop. Ciel went to step out of the door, but Malphas put a hand on his shoulder, "Wait a moment. Neither of us are leaving this house in the states we are in. Go upstairs and clean yourself up."

Ciel scowled and stomped back up the stairs. He knew he couldn't press the urgency without reawakening his mentor's suspicion. Though this did give him the opportunity to once again push the plan. He decided to take a bath, since his body seemed to be safe in this state. The water helped to calm him down and he let his mind tackle other things while he relaxed.

So how did the shield work? It could be seen and seemed to be connected to his emotions. He wasn't too sure as to what it actually did, though. He needed to test it more. And what sort of attack did he have? And how could he activate it? He sighed and got out of the tub. He didn't have answers. He needed more opportunities to test his abilities, and on more people than just Malphas.

He glanced into his wardrobe and pulled out some simple clothes: denim shorts, knee high black boots, and a skintight, long-sleeved, powder blue shirt. He ran through his hair with a towel, and decided to keep it messy.

He jumped down the stairs, and turned to see his mentor looking... strange. The raven was not wearing his usual gentleman's suit. He was wearing a black sweater and black dress pants. Ciel snickered and the elder demon glowered at him.

"It seems Leviatha left me something as well."

"You decided to wear it?"

"She insisted."

"You spoke with her?"

"Yes, I told her we were coming."

Ciel eyed his mentor's outfit. The sweater was tight fitting, and complimented his form brilliantly. Ciel turned his eyes towards the door. He didn't need to get distracted by fantasies. Though he did feel like Alois had something to do with it, "Let's go, then."

Malphas observed his charge's clothing as they walked to the usual stepping spot. The boy's sense of self fashion had improved. This outfit was certainly very form fitting. But why had the boy chosen it? "Well, interesting clothing choice yourself."

"It was simple."

"Aren't those shorts more to Alois's tastes?"

"I suppose."

"The shirt is rather... tight."

"Indeed."

Malphas's eyebrow ticked. The boy was being irritatingly unresponsive. He'd let it go with the blood, because at least the brat was answering him properly. But this was a little aggravating, "It's rather... showy."

"Isn't that your preference?"

The indifference in the boy's tone irked Malphas a little more than it should have.

"Well, yes..."

"Then why are you complaining?"

"I..." He didn't have a reason. Well, he did, it just wasn't a good one. To say he was rritated that other's would be seeing the boy like this, even if it was just Leviatha and the Mackens, would be a devastating blow to his pride. It was all the more infuriating when it was the boy himself who'd chosen the outfit. He could understand if Alois had been dressing him. But he'd never thought Ciel would feel comfortable in those types of outfits, let alone comfortable enough to dress himself in them. Not that Malphas would ever admit that.

"I wasn't aware that it was... your preference."

"It is one of them." Only because it's your preference.

The pair continued in cold silence. When they reached the shadow, Ciel stepped into Malphas's arms and the winds howled as they had before. Ciel grinned, keeping his head low so Malphas wouldn't see. The clothes were obviously having some sort of effect on his mentor. He would need to up his game in order to draw out the desired response. But this small victory was enough for now. The winds stopped and Ciel allowed himself to linger for a moment in the other's arms before stepping away and walking up to the Macken's door. Leviatha opened the door before he could knock, smiling at him and then beaming when she saw Malphas.

"Glad to see you're wearing it."

Malphas simply grunted in response, which was very... not Malphas like.

Leviatha chuckled, "Oh, I see... Moody Malphas. Well, come on in boys. Malphas said you wanted to speak with me, Ciel?"

"Yes, actually. It's rather important."

"Checking on the progress of your outfits? Materializing has never been a strong suit of mine, but I'm churning them out as quickly as Alois can design them. He's working on a few right now, actually."

"I'm glad to hear you're making progress, but this is something far more grave."

Malphas's eyes darkened. So Ciel had been hiding something from him.

Leviatha lead the pair to the parlor, where tea was already prepared. As they sat, Ciel's eyes narrowed at his teacup. He wasn't sure how New Moon Drop would affect his body. He kept his hands firmly in his lap.

"So, dear, what's the issue?"

"There has been... a development in my physical self caused by my being a demon that I thought you would like to be aware of."

"Such as?"

Ciel could feel the furious aura coming off of Malphas, "In my solo training, I have come to recognize there being two sort of... powers within me. The ones that seem more human, are recognized as being 'awake' when my eyes are blue. The ones that are more demonic are connected to my eyes being red. There are other things to the two sides, but I've summed them into the two parts of blue and red."

"I think I understand. And this is certainly an interesting byproduct of your transformation. But what does that have to do with these 'physical developments'?"

"My current body, despite no longer housing a soul, is quite literally my human body. Up until now, neither red nor blue have been awakened, nor has the power the two sides possess. But due to my training, both sides have become... unsealed. Blue is quite comfortable in this body, and has no issues with it."

"But Red does?"

The fledgling nodded, "The physical limits of this human form is, I believe, restricting my demonic power. So that power has begun to... destroy this body."

"What?!" Malphas growled. His voice was quiet and very dark. But every oil lamp in the room exploded in flames before being completely snuffed out.

"Malphas..." Leviatha murmured.

"Why did you not tell me?"

"I thought Leviatha should know as well. I suppose I couldn't be bothered saying everything twice."

"Malphas, he's told us both just now. Calm down."

The raven took a deep breath, "I apologize. That was uncalled for." With a wave of his hand, the lamps were restored, "Luckily materializing is one my strengths."

Ciel rolled his eyes, "Show off."

Leviatha grinned, but it fell quickly, "I wish there was something I could do to help you, Ciel. But I don't know how this is going to affect you."

The blunette leaned back, "I see... Well, I suppose we can do nothing but wait."

"What other developments have you made in your solo training?" The duke asked.

"Well, ya know that thing I was 'projecting' as you put it?"

"Yes."

"Well, I've figured out that it's a shield. Oh, I've got a question."

Malphas arched an eyebrow.

"Why did you leave when you came to check on me earlier?"

"Well, I'd gone because I heard you vomiting. But when I got to the door you told me that you were fine, and I couldn't smell anything strange to indicate that you actually vomited, so I found no need to remain at the door."

"Hmm..."

"Why?"

"Hmm... I think the shield does some sort of illusion. It blocked the smell of what I'm pretty sure were a few of my internal organs, and it projected my voice. I couldn't speak because of the nausea."

"So are you telling me that you regurgitated your organs into my toilet?"

"Yes."

The raven slumped in his seat and groaned, "What am I going to do with you, Little One?"

Ciel shrugged and turned to Leviatha, "You said you've been churning out outfits?"

"Yes, we've got three more finished. Alois wanted to talk to you about them, so why don't you go talk to him? I'm sure you can find him."

"Alright." The fledgling rose from his seat and began to follow his nose in order to find the blonde.

The elder demons stared at each other. Malphas looked defeated.

"I think he's going to be alright."

"His body is-"

"He seems to be rather calm in regards to it."

"But what does he know?"

"What do you know? You seem upset, more so than you ordinarily would be..."

"Ordinarily would be?"

"You know what I mean. Something else is bothering you."

"You know how you all joke about how, despite being one of the original 13, I can't feel love."

Leviatha's jaw dropped, "No..."

Malphas sighed and nodded, "Of all things it had to be that stubborn brat."

The demoness chuckled, "Of course you would fall for something that was once human."

"Oh shut it. Now, on a more serious note, I think that it's affecting me."

"What do you mean?"

"i think he's affecting me. When he whispers, I can't hear it. No, more accurately, I won't hear it. I think I'm... reacting to this new development."

"You mean your magik is actually-"

"I think so."

"You two are quite the pair. So what are you going to do about your grand plan for repayment?"

"I'm not backing out. Not when I'm so close."

"Close?"

"He's admitted to being attracted to me."

"Then why are you waiting?"

Malphas frowned, "I'm not sure... I... I don't want to rush it."

"Lovesick Malphas is hardly Malphas at all."

"Oh, shut up, Leviatha."

"No, really. I don't think you're only now starting to change because of him. I think you started changing the instant you consented to serve as butler to a human child."

"Does finding a mate really change you so completely?"

"I don't know. Perhaps you should ask Skiorus and Velorn. They were the first of us to find mates."

"I think I will..."

short chapter, I know. Writer's block