According to Lisa, doing normal, everyday, non-criminal things in the light of day would be good for Len as he continued to adjust to being part of Team ColdFlash—and when had she started using that name for the group anyway? It was obviously Cisco's influence.
She was busy breaking down the kid's barriers, after all. Len was certain they'd gone out a couple of times, no matter how much Lisa avoided the subject with cryptic smirks. All of Cisco's hesitations had centered around reconciling that he liked 'Captain Cold's evil sister', while the only issue she'd ever had was in believing she could keep a genuinely good guy interested. Neither of those things were issues anymore, or at least shouldn't be, not if Len had anything to say about it.
So he scowled only minimally when his sister said he should pick up coffee for the S.T.A.R. Labs group on his way to physical therapy; do something nice for everyone. That she had a very specific order in mind for Cisco was only mildly infuriating.
Regardless, Len appreciated the effort she was making. He never would have been able to do this if Lisa and Mick weren't with him. If they had pushed back, tried to convince him to keep things as they'd been before, he didn't think he would have been able to go against them.
That they seemed so happy too; Mick making friends with both aspects of Firestorm, as well as the rest of the team, and even being somewhat soft-spoken and…nice around Caitlin lately, which he could only assume had ricocheted out of Mick's respect for Ronnie; and Lisa seeming to want the same things Len did, in her words, 'a cute boy and a fresh start'; well, it made Len want to hang on tight to the changes happening in his life for fear that they might get whisked away from him.
The thought of his own 'cute boy' made him frown as he got in line at Jitters though. Len wasn't ready to think about Barry like that, to address the seemingly radioactive elephant in the room, not when he'd been debating if he needed to practice how to let Barry down gently.
Len made his order quickly. Tall black for himself, extra sugar; their largest size for Barry, extra everything, including an espresso shot; half caf latte for Caitlin; and some ridiculous iced monstrosity Lisa had suggested for Cisco. Len had taken his car that morning rather than the bike, for good reason, though Caitlin had also technically banned him from using the bike for another couple of weeks.
He turned to leave, his full order secured in a tray to carry it all, when he noticed a wildly waving hand attempting to get his attention. He looked over and stopped dead—it was Iris West, seated at a table with Detective Eddie Thawne.
Len hesitated. He had met both of them; Iris in passing at S.T.A.R. Labs a couple of times, though thankfully they hadn't had any time to chat; and he saw Eddie regularly when he came to collect the criminals that kept showing up at Len's apartment. But Len wouldn't exactly say he was friendly with either of them. Usually, Barry did the talking when the detectives showed up.
He'd been spotted though and it would be the…polite thing to do to at least stop by the table and say hello. Reluctantly, Len turned their direction. Iris looked pleased, and maybe decidedly dangerous, while Eddie afforded Len a rather critical glare and tight-lipped smile. No, this wasn't awkward at all...
"Detective. Miss West," Len greeted them.
"Snart," Eddie said simply.
"Off to the labs this morning?" Iris asked with her bright and somewhat challenging smile.
Len was dressed for the workout he expected between Caitlin's physical therapy and the planned sparring session with Barry. He thought he blended in quite well with the Saturday morning crowd in sneakers, workout pants, a T-shirt, and a zip-up, all in mostly greys and blues—like a real civilian. "I am," he said. He made a point to not rest the tray on their table and risk it looking like he'd be willing to join them. He did owe several others hot coffee, after all.
"The job went well last night," Eddie said a little more hushed. "A shame I didn't see Barry afterwards."
Len looked down at the assorted sized coffees he was carrying, sensing a challenge from Eddie as well. He supposed he deserved their distrust; neither of them knew him or had been instrumental in the events that went down. They didn't know his side of the story. "Barry was kind enough to bring me back to the labs for a quick check up after my leg gave me some trouble. Dr. Snow insisted."
"Are you okay?" Iris asked, her concern seemingly genuine.
"Over-zealous attentiveness on Barry's part," Len smirked, remembering the way Barry had fussed over him, held him close, and eventually crowded in on his space on the hospital bed, "but I'm fine. Some consequences are more long-lasting than others. Though I'm afraid I don't actually know how much either of you have been told about…recent events." He meant his frozen leg, maybe the entire frozen ordeal, but he really wasn't sure how much of anything these two knew.
Their matching gazes were suddenly much more penetrating as Iris said, "Oh, you can assume we know everything," and Eddie's smile took on some of the danger so prevalent in hers. Barry had very loyal friends.
"Ah," Len said, itching to leave now, because Detective West had been bad enough, and while things were mostly amicable between them now, Len was thankful there hadn't been any opportunities for them to be alone again since that day in the labs.
"Barry said you were going to work on his fighting style today," Eddie said with a brief once over at Len's workout clothes as if that fact needed confirmation. "You don't usually fight him hand to hand though, so I'd recommend being careful. I speak from experience; his speed can sneak up on you."
"Believe me…I know," Len said, thinking of his faded bruises, though there was still a faint trace of them left on his jaw like smudges of green finger paint that seemed to pull both Eddie and Iris's attention as he said that. Barry really had told them everything; it made Len feel like he was under a microscope.
"You've been working so closely with everyone lately," Iris said. "I know you've only recently been fully back on your feet, but still. We should all…grab dinner sometime."
Oh god, Len thought, what did she mean by all? Was she vying for a double date? And if so, was this meant to be some sort of archaic approval system, or would they pass judgment after spending time with him and then lay down whether or not they felt he was deserving of Barry?
Which was pointless, Len thought, because he knew he wasn't and never would be, and he didn't need to be found wanting by Barry's closest friends when he'd already realized that for himself.
"I'm sure Lisa and Mick would enjoy meeting more of the team in a casual setting," Len said to deflect her potential meaning.
Iris pursed her lips. "I wouldn't say I'm part of the team."
"Perhaps not in an active sense," Len said, "but support is definitely a necessary part of any team, Miss West. You might not provide that in the same ways as Cisco or Dr. Snow, but that doesn't mean your contributions aren't needed. Barry speaks very highly of you quite often. I'm sure Detective Thawne would be even worse." He glanced at Eddie, trying to smile cordially in lieu of his joke.
Eddie's stiff façade crumbled as the young detective smiled more naturally, and Iris looked away from Len with a brighter smile of her own, leaning into Eddie for a moment in an automatic desire to get closer to him. They had an ease about them that Len envied.
"If you'll excuse me though, I really need to be getting to the labs, or all my efforts this morning will be for naught if I show up with lukewarm coffee." Len lifted the tray slightly with a polite nod before turning to leave.
"Snart!" Iris called after him. "Just some future advice."
Len tensed but looked back at her expectantly.
"Next time, if you include an apple fritter…Barry will love you forever." Her face lit up with a lovely radiance, and yet there was definitely something gauging beneath the glow. "You know," she added in a softer, steadier tone, "if you care about that sort of thing."
Oh, this woman was dangerous. Barry and Len's sisters had quite a bit in common. "I'll keep that in mind," Len said neutrally. He glanced once more at Eddie, who looked less confrontational and more…disappointed now, then back at a contemplative Iris before nodding to them again. "Another time," he said, and moved more swiftly as he made his way for the exit.
Barry bounced on the balls of his feet, clad in his grey S.T.A.R. Labs T-shirt and navy sweatpants, momentarily buzzed from the rush of caffeine after downing his coffee.
Len had brought him coffee. He'd gone out of his way to stop at Jitters and bring Barry coffee. Okay, so he'd also picked up some for Caitlin and Cisco, but still. It made Barry wonderfully anxious and alert.
Len and Caitlin were in the other room, which Barry could see clearly due to the glass walls, though he couldn't hear them. Cisco was going over some minor adjustments to the new suit he was making after the other one had been destroyed, most of which Barry thought was awesome and all but that didn't require his full attention if he wanted to watch Len furtively while the other man's back was to him. Barry was jittery after the coffee, which he may have drunk a little too fast. He could already feel his body burning through it though.
Cisco paused in his explanation of some sort of new temperature sensors for the suit to take a sip of his iced coffee through the straw, which drew Barry's attention, and he couldn't help noticing the way the young scientist smiled to himself.
His smile dropped like a guilty kid when he realized Barry had caught his dopey expression. "It's hazelnut," Cisco said like that explained everything. "I mentioned I liked hazelnut."
"To Len?"
Cisco's brow furrowed.
"Oh," Barry said as the obvious caught up to him. "So…when did you mention liking hazelnut to Lisa?" he asked with a more teasing grin.
"It wasn't a date," Cisco said by way of answer, before blushing harder at how telling a response that was. "It wasn't…meant to be a date. She said she wanted to go over a map of where all their safe houses are—well most of them; they're still a little weird about revealing all of them—to see if we can use them like way stations for doing patrols. You know, checkpoints, rest points. For people who don't have super speed," he clarified.
"That's a great idea."
"Right?"
"So…at what point did it start becoming a date?" Barry asked.
Cisco stalled for time by taking another sip from his coffee. He hissed like he'd just given himself an ice cream headache before saying, "About the time we went to check out one of the safe houses in person to consider surveillance and com setup, and…started making out."
"Cisco!" Barry laughed.
"She started it!"
"Not surprisingly." Barry laughed a little harder, and while Cisco glared at him for a moment, he eventually laughed along. "At least Len likes you now, so, you know, he probably won't give you some scary shovel talk with his cold gun pointed below the waist or anything. Probably." Barry laughed again when Cisco paled.
"That's not funny!" Cisco glanced nervously back at Len through the glass, who was still faced away from them. He shuddered. "I'm totally on board with Team ColdFlash, okay, but I still don't ever want to piss the guy off. Lisa's really getting into this, ya know?"
Barry snickered again because his mind could only think innuendoes for a moment, and the scandalized expression on Cisco's face when he looked back at him just made it funnier. Cisco smacked his arm, hard, though Barry feigned it hurt more than it did. "Ow!"
"Into the team!" Cisco chided. "She was super excited about setting up posts, and time slots for patrols, and specific criminals they know that we can take down across the city. The Snarts really get into making a game out of things. And whoa," his eyes widened at a sudden thought, "can you imagine her and Len running a raid party?"
It took Barry a moment to realize Cisco meant for an MMO or something, and…shit, yeah, that would be epic. He wondered if Len had ever played one, and wow, if he asked, Len would probably think he was even more of a dork. But then Len was a bit of a dork too, so maybe the answer would be yes.
Barry shook his head. "We're creating a vigilante team here, Cisco, not a guild."
"Yeah, but…team building exercises are very important in working relationships."
"Cisco…" Barry chuckled.
Cisco shrugged and sipped at his coffee again, smiling in satisfaction over it, and maybe going a little googly-eyed and distracted as his thoughts drifted. Eventually, he came back to earth and nudged Barry's arm where he had previously smacked it. "So what about you?"
"Dude, I do not have time to play—"
"I mean with…you know." Cisco not at all covertly gestured toward Len in the other room. "He's been pretty cool this whole time. Urg." He closed his eyes as if banishing another ice cream headache. "Don't tell him I said that. Why is that so easy to walk into?"
Barry snorted. "You're the one who named him."
"Fair…" Cisco slumped in defeat, but as much as Barry wished he'd shifted the conversation to another topic, Cisco looked back at him awaiting more of an answer. "So?"
"We, uhh…" Barry looked over Cisco's shoulder into the other room.
Caitlin had Len standing now, facing the wall, and damn did his ass look nice in those sweats with the way his T-shirt hitched up slightly… His exercises were pretty basic now, various methods of stretching his calf without strain, letting Caitlin know if anything hurt worse than it should.
Len pushed his hands into the wall while stretching his leg back, then stood up straight and jumped for an indistinct point near the ceiling, getting a fairly impressive vertical lift off his bare feet. On the third jump, however, he landed with what looked like a mild shot of pain that made him stumble and lean into the wall while Caitlin laid a hand on his back. Of course Len shook his head at her like it was nothing to be concerned about.
Barry startled when he felt Cisco's hand rest gently on his arm.
"That bad, huh?" Cisco said when he turned to him.
"Everything's been great," Barry defended, "you've seen…you know." He shrugged noncommittally.
"Barry, I'm not talking about you two generally getting along and making a good team with the rest of the group," Cisco said. He pulled his hand back and cradled his coffee, averting his gaze. "While I am forever scarred by that surveillance footage…it certainly seemed like something you were both equally on board for, and the way he talked about you when any of us pushed back during those early days, threatening him to never betray any of us like that again or suffer the consequences…well, his defenses always had a decidedly romantic slant to them in my opinion. You both get this same faraway, pleased, miserable look on your faces. If that's not pining, I don't know what is." He glanced sheepishly up at Barry.
"You think?" Barry asked hopefully. He leaned back against a table while Cisco dumped himself into one of his more commonly used roller chairs. "I know it's weird. I mean…I know it must seem weird, or had to have seemed weird in the beginning—me and Captain Cold. We're complete opposites—literally. He's a criminal, or at least was. He's older. He's tried to kill me more than once…"
"And saved your life as many times by now, which is the only reason I'm okay leaving him alone with you."
"Thanks, Dad," Barry huffed. "Didn't realize I needed another one of those."
"Hey, I'm allowed to be cautious. He kidnapped my brother!" Cisco didn't say this tried and true phrase with the same hostility he might have in the past though; it just slipped off the tongue as a ready insult. "But the really weird thing is, for all your opposing qualities, you have a lot of similar ones too. Parallel, separated, sure, but not wholly opposite. And what's that matter anyway? You get along. You enjoy spending time together. You obviously find his stupid face attractive."
Barry rolled his eyes, resisting the urge to mention that Len and Lisa did share several aspects of their stupid faces.
"And according to Lisa, he spent the majority of the time he was laid up at his apartment marathoning Babylon 5. No one with that good of taste can be 100% evil." Cisco grinned at Barry as he sipped once more at his iced coffee.
Barry shared the expression. Whether it was Len's stupid—attractive—face, his dorky puns and showmanship, his love of several things geek and good music, or even the danger and dark past beneath the surface, or the painful more recent past they shared, when everything else was brushed aside Barry simply loved being with Len and felt happier in his company.
"Okay, I'm hesitant to work Len's leg too much more this morning if you two are going to spar," Caitlin's voice interrupted Barry's thoughts, causing him to lurch away from the table he'd been leaning against. She entered the room with Len in tow behind her, who looked energized and warmed up, not really limping but not perfectly fluid in his step either.
"You're going to have to go easy on me, kid," Len smirked at him, "but don't think that means I'll go easy on you."
Barry's heart fluttered at the sight of Len's playful expression and the gentle tease in his words. "No promises," he joked back, echoing Len's phrasing from the previous night. He caught a sly look from Cisco as the other man rolled away from him to a nearby computer terminal, and moved to meet Len in the center of the room. "Come on, I know just where to go for this."
Barry led Len out of the elevator into a simple square room a few floors down from the main labs. There were several rooms on this floor with uses Barry couldn't even guess at, but this particular room was mostly empty and had flooring similar to a gymnast space.
"I used this room for practicing sharp turns when I first got my speed," he explained as they entered, setting a pair of water bottles against the wall for later. "The bounce to the floor actually made that pretty tough originally. Should make for good padding though." He stretched his arms over his head and rolled his shoulders as they moved for the center of the space, unable to contain his excitement at actually sparring with Len. It reminded him of how he'd felt when Oliver first offered to train him, though at least this time Barry wouldn't have to worry about taking any arrows in the back.
"What is this room normally used for?" Len asked.
"Something to do with researching tachyon condensation that goes way over my head," Barry laughed. "You can ask Cisco later if you want good fuel for your next nap."
Len chuckled back at him. He had left his zip-up where he'd been doing therapy with Caitlin, leaving him in a heather blue V-neck and lighter grey sweatpants. It shouldn't have been strange to see him that way, Barry had seen Len in S.T.A.R. Labs brand sweats for days, but something about this being Len in his own casualwear made it seem more personal.
Len got right down on the floor to do some additional stretches, and Barry followed suit even though he didn't really need to, given his body chemistry.
"Do you and Lisa spar much?" he asked.
Len offered a disbelieving chuckle. "Not anymore, kid. We think too much alike."
"Why is that a bad thing?"
Len spread his legs to stretch center, showing off how impressively limber he could be, which so did not cause Barry's thoughts to momentarily stray. "Do you know what happens when you get two like-minded individuals executing the same move, at the same speed and angle, toward the same body part, at the same time?" Len rattled off coyly.
Barry raised an eyebrow at him.
"You break your sister's toe and get an elbow to the face."
"Oh!" Barry exclaimed. He could somehow totally envision that scenario playing out. "Ouch."
"Invariably. At least if we have that problem today, you heal quickly," he winked—actually winked, which would have been enough to do Barry in right then, if Len hadn't jumped to his feet at that point, prompting Barry to do the same. "Never good to stretch too much before a workout though, or you tire the muscles, I've just been a little out of practice the past few weeks. Of course I doubt getting tired is something you usually have to worry about."
"If you knew how many miles I'd put in on that treadmill upstairs," Barry whistled, "but I only break a sweat when I forget to eat. So…you're buying lunch after this, right?" He squared off facing Len, grinning widely.
Len mirrored him, bodily and with his smile, but then seemed to shrug the comradery off with a shake of his head. His face went serious. "Focus, kid. I'll feed you if you earn it. No speed today. You need to learn how to handle yourself at normal reaction time first, then when you speed up, no one will be able to touch you."
"Right," Barry nodded, "so how should we—"
Since Barry was fixated on not using his super speed, he wasn't prepared to react when Len was suddenly in his space knocking his feet out from under him and crashing him hard to the floor on his back. He gasped as the wind rushed from his lungs.
"If someone disrupts your speed, Scarlet, you still need to know how to block," Len called down to him. And then there was an outstretched hand, and Barry blinked his momentary dizziness away as he reached for it. Len hoisted him up with impressive strength, though maybe not with quite the same effortlessness as Mick.
"I wasn't ready," Barry said, thankful his recovery time for something like that was next to zero, so by the time he was facing Len again, he was no longer winded.
Len eyed him, unamused.
"Right, I know, enemies aren't going to wait for me to be ready, I just meant…" Barry trailed, squaring his stance again; no excuses. Oliver had been the first to teach him not to get cocky about his speed, and the last thing he wanted to do was relapse back to that, not after he'd learned how often his speed could fail him.
Len came at Barry again, seemingly going for the same move, but this time Barry planted his foot more solidly, deflecting the pass of Len hooking under his knee to trip him. Barry tried to grab Len while they were close, secure the other man's arms to his sides so he couldn't go for any punches, but before Barry could wrestle him to the ground, Len went limp in his hold and they crumbled to the floor.
Barry was too surprised to know how to react—he'd expected a struggle not dead weight dropping—and just as they landed, Len rolled, slipped from Barry's grip, and ending up on top of Barry with his knee planted against Barry's windpipe. Thankfully, Len didn't hold the position for long, and Barry gasped when he was lifted back to his feet again.
"Starting to get the lesson yet?" Len asked.
"You…always know how to counteract anything I do."
"And you should too. Every move has a counter move, more than one if you're smart. Anything someone tries on you, you should be thinking five moves ahead to how you can counter them and get the upper hand. With your speed that should come easy, but you need to get a handle on it at a snail's pace first or it'll never be second nature."
Barry marveled at Len's logic. Oliver had been an effective teacher, but he couldn't give Barry the special attention required when he had his own city to protect. If only Barry had had Len to train him when he was facing Reverse Flash…
The brief thought made Barry scowl, hating that so much of his life was made up of what ifs and if onlys that coiled like a hissing snake in his chest, so he decided to use that. He never wanted to feel as helpless as Thawne had made him feel. Len was here now, and combined with what Barry had learned from Oliver, Eddie, and even Thawne himself, any new villains wouldn't stand a chance.
They spent several rounds with Len always starting with the same move, sometimes doing the same second move, sometimes something else, until Barry was thinking of different ways to counter, and all the different ways Len might counter that. They made it up to three sometimes four moves before usually Len took Barry down, though Barry claimed a couple of rounds.
When Len finally started a new round aiming an uppercut at Barry's side instead of the usual tripping move, Barry wasn't even thrown, but deflected the hit, and would have felt a moment of pride that he hadn't been tripped up by the change, if Len hadn't spun away from the block, charged Barry right at his center of gravity, lifted him, and flipped Barry over his shoulder. Barry landed with an oof.
He was down but not beaten, so instead of admitting defeat, Barry grabbed Len around the knees before the other man could move away and yanked. Len cried out in surprise as he toppled, landing with an equal oof to Barry's as he hit the floor beside him, only reversed, their heads facing opposite directions. Len coughed through the harsh landing and glared at him a moment before breaking out in a strained laugh.
"Better," he huffed, and patted Barry's chest from their flipped positions. "The rest comes with practice, kid. Get used to enough moves and counters…you'll be ready for anything."
"Does that mean we can make this a regular occurrence?" Barry asked eagerly.
"Sure. I need the workout." Len groaned as he started to sit up, so Barry reached for the arm beside his own and gripped it firmly. Using each other for leverage, they pulled, their hips aligned enough that when they sat up, they were shoulder to shoulder, their faces close.
Barry shuddered. This was the perfect moment to be bold like he had been last night, no interruptions. Len's lips were damp from the sweat sheening his face, and parted slightly as he took in deep, labored breaths. And there was no mistaking that Len's eyes were trained just as heatedly on Barry's lips in return.
So Barry leaned into the space between them…but before his lips could meet Len's, Len pulled away, released Barry's arm, and lurched to his feet. Barry hastily followed. He didn't understand why Len kept fighting this, but he wasn't willing to give up that easily.
"Why don't we take a break?" Barry suggested, following Len to the edge of the room, where they'd set their water bottles.
Len stayed facing away from him as he snatched his up and took a drink. "If I break, I'll need to stop, kid. I don't bounce back the way you do."
"Is your leg okay?" Barry hadn't noticed any telling increase to Len's limp.
"Don't worry, it actually feels better than usual. Another reason we kept things slow."
"Right, sure…so why don't we stop?" Barry came up next to Len, peering around into his face with a winning smile.
Len avoided his stare and bent to set his water bottle back on the floor. Barry used the opportunity to move into Len's space, nothing at all subtle about how close he was when Len stood back up. Len looked startled, enough that he didn't immediately back away.
Barry reached reverently for the remaining bruises he'd caused along Len's jaw, nearly faded completely now, and drew Len's face toward his own. But Len resisted, shook Barry away, and stumbled back.
"Look, kid..." He seemed pained, conflicted, but why, Barry couldn't understand.
If Len wanted him, why did he keep pulling away? If he didn't…had he ever, or had some things been just for fun and convenience's sake after all, and the good person Len had become just didn't want to hurt Barry by admitting that?
When Len looked down at the floor as if searching for the right words, Barry took the initiative. "Was any of it fake?" he asked cautiously.
Len's head snapped up, the pained expression intensifying with the added remorse that filled his ice blue eyes. "No, Barry…I swear, the only time I lied was after I left here."
The words came so readily, Barry wanted to believe them. He stepped into Len's space again. "Then what happened to the guy who said I was everything about a new beginning he'd ever ask for?"
There was moisture in Len's eyes, every muscle in his body taut like a spring trap. But instead of being triggered, the tension seemed to release and melt away into something sadder. Len's voice was soft as he said, "He stopped believing he should ask."
Barry had hold of Len's lightly bruised cheek before he could protest again, pulling him toward him swiftly, his other hand sliding around Len's waist where he clung to the damp lower back of Len's T-shirt, their bodies aligning perfectly as they came together and their mouth's met.
Barry didn't allow for anything chaste this time, not like three weeks ago when he'd been compelled to kiss Len with eager forgiveness. His lips parted as he sought out the connection he'd been missing, that he'd tried since before the start of week two to recapture, and held Len as snugly as he could.
For a few moments, Len responded beautifully in reply, his own hands trembling and then clinging to Barry's hips as he returned the kiss, meeting the way Barry cloyed for his tongue with equal fervor. But in too short a time, something seemed to spark in Len that made him pull away again, gasping out of the kiss as he turned his head.
"Barry…" He tried to step back but Barry hung on tight.
"Please…" Barry near whimpered between them, sliding his right hand around the soft fuzz of Len's shorn hair and pulling him back in.
This time Len didn't resist. It was easy to shift and shuffle their somewhat stumbling steps until Len's back pressed into the nearby wall and Barry was able to sink against him. It was everything Barry would have asked for to replace the bitter image of this same position in the warehouse. This time there was no anger, no raging disbelief, just need and rising heat.
As their mouths and bodies slotted against each other, Len's hands moved up beneath the hem of Barry's T-shirt, feathering along the skin and then squeezing possessively. Barry followed his example, his left hand slipping up under the line of Len's shirt, feeling the warm skin of his side and back, then trailed down again where his fingers teased the edges of the elastic along his sweats. The promising contact made Len buck up against him, and Barry moaned into Len's mouth with the reaction he could feel building between them.
It was everything Barry wanted it to be…before Len snapped his head away once more and moved his hands to brace against Barry's chest.
"Barry…stop…" Len said between ragged breaths.
Barry leaned helplessly forward, wanting only to reconnect. "Please," he said again, fingers pressing greedily into the skin beneath his hands. "I listened when you pleaded with me that night…"
Len pulled himself further back against the wall, staring at Barry in frustration, maybe even anger that Barry couldn't place or comprehend. "Yes," he said sharply, "and maybe you shouldn't have."
The words carried an immediate sting that broke the spell Barry was under. His hands loosened from Len's side and head, falling away as he stepped back with a kind of blank disbelief, only his right hand lingering as it came to rest on Len's shoulder. "What…?" He couldn't process anything more than uttering that breathless question.
Len didn't answer, but he sighed, closed his eyes, shook his head, and opened them again with grief flashing through the vibrant blue. He pulled away fully, stepped away and around Barry, leaving him there with his hands dropping to his sides, staring at an empty wall.
Barry felt numb and nauseous—how was this happening to him again…?
Only when Barry heard Len falter and pause in his exit did he look to see the other man halted at the doorway, hand to the wall with most of his face obscured almost out of the room. Len looked sad, pitying, Barry thought, when he turned his head to meet Barry's gaze from around the barrier of the wall.
"I'm sorry, Barry," he said, and darted from the room.
Why had Barry even tried? Iris had felt something for him, something…but not enough, not enough that she truly returned his affections. Now here he was again going through the same let down because he couldn't get it through his head when he wanted someone more than they wanted him.
Barry turned and slumped against the wall, the energy drained from him so fully, he felt almost dizzy, and let gravity take him until he slid down into a heap on the floor. He sat with his knees drawn up, arms wrapped around them, and buried his face to hide the tears he could already feel coming.
TBC...