Trigger Warning: Attempted rape

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, but I am the proud owner of a llama in British Columbia.

I can practically feel you trying to figure out who tries to rape who... Anyways, I'm back. So far Wednesdays feel like a good day for me to update. Still trying to figure things out so that may be subject to change. I finally found the one spot in my room where I have wifi. Please review and tell your friends. If you for whatever reason are wondering about my personal life, I found a dead cat in my yard on Sunday. Enjoy!

Jeremy was a good father to Adriana, and Charlie couldn't help but be jealous. She smiled when Charlie entered the room, but when she took sight of Jeremy her whole face would light up. Jeremy took just as much pleasure with her company. He spent time with her every day, and it was obvious that they would have a good relationship throughout their lives.

Charlie felt himself fading more and more into the background of Adriana and Vanessa's lives. Now, he was only called upon when both Vanessa and Jeremy were busy, which was not very often. He cherished those couple of hours anytime they came as if it was the last time he would get a chance to hold Adriana. It was a ridiculous notion of course, and Charlie was barely slipping away at all, but issues with friendships always seem larger than they actually are.

"Do you notice anything…off about Vanessa?" Charlie asked Lucas one day while they ate their lunch together. "Something not altogether right." Lucas put his fork down.

"What do you mean?" he asked not completely innocently.

"I guess nothing really. We don't talk as much and I don't know. She just seems distant." Lucas nervously licked his lips.

"Alright I wasn't supposed to tell you this, but obviously this is bothering you so I might as well set things straight," Lucas started. Charlie leaned forward with interest. "She's restarted things with Jeremy." Charlie practically shouted with excitement, but he stopped himself.

"Are they dating?" he asked. Vanessa's relationship hadn't been what he had been trying to figure out at all, but this was far more interesting than feeling left out. Lucas nodded.

"More than that," he continued with more intensity. "He moved in with her and Adriana. I think she's going to be serious about him."

Charlie tried to remember the last time Vanessa had a serious relationship. It had been a while. She didn't sleep around the way that Lucas did, but long term dating didn't work well with her. She seemed to just not enjoy it. If she was living with Jeremy it really meant she was serious. A thought suddenly occurred to Charlie.

"Why didn't she want me to know?" he inquired of Lucas. Lucas's joy quickly left him and was replaced by the return of his nervous lip licking.

"You've been a bit emotional lately, Charlie," Lucas admitted. "There's no denying it. She didn't want you to be upset that their relationship is moving along so quickly." The statement about Charlie's emotions stung him a little. He tried to seem not put off by it.

"Doesn't seem to be moving quickly to me," he shrugged. "She was pregnant for seven months. That's seven months they weren't living together." Lucas smiled and shook his head.

"You know what I mean."

Charlie chuckled a little and looked down at the glass of water he found himself clutching tightly. He loosened his grip and took a sip. Lucas looked undeniably attractive in the current light. They were inside the lunch tent, but afternoon sunlight was streaming through the tent flap and hitting Lucas's dirty blonde hair just at the top so that it shined. Lucas noticed Charlie staring at him.

"What?" he asked. "Is there something on face?"

"Nah," Charlie answered shaking his head. "I just realized that I've never really given you a proper answer."

"Don't worry about that," Lucas mollified. "Seeing that you aren't sleeping in my bed, I think I've gotten my answer."

"No," Charlie maintained. "You deserve a real answer. My answer is that I'm flattered. I never expected to be able to find someone other than Stephen. I'm even getting over him in a way. I guess it's about time. My point is that maybe someday I'll be ready to be with you. Until then, I don't want to lead you on. Do what you usually do, and I'll come around eventually."

"I've stopped with the women," Lucas interrupted. Charlie shook his head.

"That's my point," he explained. "I don't want you to."

"I want to," Lucas argued. "It's my way of showing that I'm serious about you. You don't have to devote yourself to me yet or whatever, but I'm already there. I'm already waiting."

"I don't want to feel like you're waiting for me," Charlie complained. "It's like having someone stare at you while you finish a meal only ten times worse."

"Fine," Lucas agreed. "But you can't make me sleep with women."

A couple of days went by, and Charlie found the uncomfortableness he felt before slipping away. Once he got to know him, he enjoyed Jeremy's company quite a bit. Jeremy was friendly and willing to discuss anything. He was a talker to say the least. He spoke to anyone within reach, and that included Adriana. He would tell her stories that she couldn't possibly understand yet.

Jeremy also seemed to wordlessly understand Charlie's need to see Adriana frequently. He never kept her away for long. Often he would pretend to have work at the same as Vanessa just so Charlie had an excuse to babysit. On those days, he would go for a long walk proud that he had done a good deed that day. Yes, things seemed to be going swimmingly until Jeremy had an inevitable question.

"What ever happened to that guy, Stephen that you were with?" Jeremy asked innocently. Charlie almost did a spit take. He had nearly forgotten that it wasn't common knowledge that Stephen was a Death Eater. Charlie saw Vanessa stiffen behind Jeremy when she heard the question.

"We both had different values that didn't match up," he explained waving off the question, but Jeremy wasn't deterred.

"He's never around anymore though. Why'd he quit his job?" he inquired. Charlie couldn't figure out a way around that one. There was plenty of dating among workers, but very few ever quit because of a bad breakup. Charlie was stunned for a moment as he tried to figure out a proper response.

"You ask too many questions," Vanessa scolded Jeremy. With her reproachful tone, Jeremy let go of the topic.

"Sorry if I pried," Jeremy apologized. Charlie let out a relieved breath that he didn't realize he had been holding. "If you're ready to get back out there if have a friend you could try. What do you say? How about a double date tonight? You, my friend, Vanessa, and me."

"I don't really do blind date," Charlie tried to dissuade.

"You don't do any kind of dating," Vanessa pointed out. "You might as well try."

Was Charlie ready for dating? He didn't see any reason why he shouldn't try. People were constantly using the terms rebound and transition. Maybe this guy could be Charlie's rebound. Perhaps it would help him get over Stephen to get closer to Lucas. It was possible that a meaningless date was exactly what he needed.

"I'll do it!" Charlie answered more enthusiastically then he meant.

"Great!" Jeremy replied matching Charlie's enthusiasm. "Meet here at eight!"

Charlie smiled in thanks and left Vanessa and Jeremy's tent. He decided in a spur of the moment to go visit Lucas while he worked. He had the opportunity to tell him the news before he heard it from someone else. He knew exactly where he would be. He was in the abandoned egg warming tent.

Charlie pushed through the tent flap and stopped dead in his tracks. Lucas hadn't noticed him enter yet and something stalled Charlie. Looking at Lucas work so lovingly and carefully made him realize that he could fall in love with him. He was suddenly afraid that Lucas would be hurt by the news of him going out on a date. He would just have to make it clear that it didn't mean much.

"Hey, Lucas," he said finding that his voice was shaking.

"Oh hi, Charlie," Lucas greeted. "I didn't see you come in." They sat in silence for a moment while Charlie worked up the courage to give his news.

"I have a date tonight," he spilled. Lucas jerked his head back and stared at Charlie for a moment then looked back down at the egg his was warming with his wand. "Jeremy offered to set me up with a friend of his, and now I have a double date with him and Vanessa." Lucas nodded and bit his lip.

"Why is this guy a better option than me?" he asked. It sounded like he was trying to joke, but he ended up just sounding hurt. Charlie looked at him in distress.

"Lucas!" he cried. "He isn't. I think he'll help me get over Stephen." Lucas continued to stare at his egg.

"Why don't you let me help you?" he begged. "I know I could."

"I don't want you to be a rebound relationship," Charlie explained. Lucas hadn't made eye contact with Charlie throughout the conversation. He simply sighed in response. "Lucas, won't you look at me?"

Lucas lifted his head and looked at Charlie but still not directly in the eyes, and he didn't smile. His face was expressionless. Charlie felt himself over come with grief at the look of pain in Lucas's eyes, and he did something he hadn't expected to.

"I think I'll fall in love with you," he said feeling the words fall out of his mouth. He quickly bent down and kissed Lucas on the cheek. He hurried out of the tent, but not before he saw Lucas's mouth twitch into a smile.

A few minutes before eight, Charlie stood in front of his mirror inspecting himself. He had spent the better part of the evening finding a shirt and pants he hadn't ruined through work. All he had found were his suit from Bronwyn's funeral, which was too formal, a pair of dark wash jeans, and a blue sweater. He found it strangely humorous how he only cared about his appearance on special occasions. When Charlie was young he assumed that gay men were all obsessed with their looks.

He enjoyed his walk to Vanessa's tent. He hadn't had the need to walk in the dark for quite a while, and he was finding the view of the stars relaxing. Like many people before him, Charlie liked to remember that everyone he loved would see the same stars. Charlie chuckled as he suddenly realized that everyone he hated saw the same stars too. He wondered group Stephen now belonged to. The stars belonged to everyone and no one all the same.

Charlie date for the night, Nathan, was not up to par. He was no good at conversing. Once the small talk had been completed the conversation was much less than stimulating. Nathan knew nothing of Charlie's standby topic of quidditch. Nathan was a wand maker by profession, and though Charlie would be interested to learn about that, the only thing Nathan would speak of on that matter was how much he hated his mentor. Charlie found that like the first time he and Stephen shared feelings for each other, he felt awkward. Nathan lacked the teasing easy going nature of Stephen. By nine, Charlie was restless and ready to go back to his tent. He gently excused himself and thanked Vanessa for the dinner.

"I'll walk you back," Nathan offered gentlemanly. Charlie smiled and nodded. Though he wasn't too impressed by Nathan, he thought some company would be nice.

He was sorely mistaken. The walk there was uncomfortable enough. They were in complete silence, and Charlie could practically feel Nathan breathing down his neck. He was grateful when he finally reached his tent. Charlie said goodbye and Nathan nodded in response. He didn't feel like he should kiss or even hug Nathan in farewell; so he stuck out his hand for a handshake. Nathan took his hand firmly, more firmly than Charlie had expected.

Nathan grabbed Charlie's arm and started to push him into the tent before Charlie could even realize what was going on. He seized Charlie's other hand and used it to cover his mouth to smother the yell that was just escaping his lips. Charlie struggled as hard as he could and managed to get loose for a mere second, but Nathan was back on top of him. He shoved him from behind towards the cot and slammed Charlie's face into the pillow. He held Charlie's arms back in an uncomfortable position with one hand. He had a knee on the back of Charlie's head, and he was quickly using his free hand to try to rip off Charlie's clothes. Charlie thrashed and screamed but his anguish was muffled by the pillows. Suddenly, he felt Nathan stop moving entirely.

"Don't make another move or I swear, I will kill you," said a familiar voice. Charlie gasped in both surprise and relief. He noticed that his pillow was wet with his own tears. He felt Nathan get off his body and back away towards the wall.

"Get the fuck out," the voice warned. Charlie heard Nathan sprint out of the tent, and he heard a pop outside that meant he had left. Charlie slowly turned over onto his back.

Stephen stood above him with his hand still clenched tightly around his wand. He was shivering slightly and his body was covered with a thin layer of sweat. He looked down at Charlie with his blue green eyes screaming relief.

"Are you alright?" he asked. Charlie could barely get words out for a moment.

"No," he mumbled. "You, get the fuck out. How dare you accuse him of evil after what you've done?" Stephen rolled his eyes.

"So you're not happy I saved you?" he questioned.

"That's not what I said," Charlie murmured. Stephen stared at him for a second and then turned a picked a glass up off of Charlie's desk. He quickly filled it with water and handed it to him.

"I'm not going to go until I'm sure you're okay," he claimed decisively. Charlie obliged to the water and figured that it would be very difficult for him to get Stephen out in his current state. He downed the glass quickly, and Stephen refilled it again.

"Why'd you come here anyway," Charlie asked between sips.

"To make sure you're safe," Stephen explained. Charlie gave up trying to understand. His head hurt.

"I know what it's like to be raped," Stephen revealed. Charlie looked up in confusion. He had never heard Stephen mention rape. "It happened recently," Stephen said with a shake of his hand. "You feel like you don't belong to yourself, and you start to hate your own body. Maybe it's because it's your body that made the person want to do what they did in the first place. I don't know. Whatever the reason you won't feel at home in your own body. It's okay though. You're strong. You'll get through it."

Charlie didn't like taking advice from Stephen. He lost the privilege of intimate conversation when he walked out. Charlie felt like his was betraying himself by listening to his feelings. He did feel like he had been taken advantage of, but he also felt that way about Stephen. Stephen had never taken advantage of his body, but he did of his love.

"I'm fine now," Charlie demanded interrupting Stephen's thoughts.

"You're not yet," he said shaking his head. "I need you to get out of here tonight, just one night." Charlie looked apprehensive. "Please."

"Why?" he questioned.

"Don't make me tell you," Stephen pleaded. "You know why."

"If it's what I think it is," Charlie began bravely, "I'd rather die than leave."

"I can only offer you so much protection," Stephen begged.

"I don't want your fucking protection!" Charlie shouted. "Tell him that they can kill me if they want. I don't care. Get out so I can get a defense together. I hope you're happy. You've lost your element of surprise."

"I underestimated your bravery," Stephen said smiling sadly. "You really are the Gryffindor I fell in love with." He disappearated with a pop. Charlie dashed out of his tent into the night.