Gale,
Nineteen years isn't the normal grace period for a response, I know. But it's taken me this long to sort out my feelings. I need to send this so you know why I never answer your calls. Why it's been so long.
I wasn't ready to hear what you had to say. It was too fresh. Too painful. I put all of your letters in a box and stored it away until I had the strength to face what was inside them. Well, the other day, I took it out and read them all. Every single letter. When I finished the last one, Peeta suggested I write back.
My words never seem to translate well on paper. Peeta had to stop me from ripping up the fiftieth sheet of paper last night. He said to pretend I'm having a conversation with you. So, this is me. Talking to my best friend in the woods.
My son is fourteen months old now, my daughter five. They never cease to amaze me. How can something can be so innocent? They get to grow up without the Games. Without fear. My one job left in this life is to make sure that they get what we never did.
If you told me I'd have a family nineteen years ago, I'd have probably punched or screamed at you. Maybe both. Surely, this was never on my list. But right now, I'm watching Peeta on the floor playing with Willow. The adoration on his face brings me more happiness than I'll ever be able to describe. When I tuck her in at night, her blue eyes are so much like his. Rye's on my lap. He has the Seam eyes. Grey and stormy. And I've never been more at home. These people make my life meaningful again.
I'm glad to hear that you didn't spend a lot of time moping around. You never were one to sit and wait until the action was over. By now, most of the information in those letters is probably outdated. Maybe you even have children of your own. But I want you to know that I do think about you. I hope you were able to find the same peace that I was.
Gale, you were such an essential part of my life. I never got to tell you that, so I am now. You found me, healed me, and let me find light again, too. Without you, I wouldn't be who I am today. I'm not going to lie, though, because we never did to each other, the rebellion tore you apart. It tore us all apart, but the anger and resentment flared especially in you. The revolution was the gasoline for your flames that consumed everything around you. I know because it happened to me too. We didn't grow apart because we're different, we grew apart because of how similar we are. It wasn't healthy anymore. I think back to all the times we fought and I know that separate paths were inevitable. You may think I chose Peeta for reasons other than the one I did, but you're mistaken. If we'd been meant to be, I would have found you. Called you. You were both so vital to me and I'll never forget that.
My Gale, the one in the woods, will always hold a special place in my memory. I wouldn't trade those days for the world, but neither would I trade this. What I have now.
Now comes the hard part. I don't blame you for her death. I think about her everyday. Every night. I'll never truly be able to separate you two, but war does terrible things to people. But still, Gale. You were supposed to look out for her. How could you have just let Prim go into action? She was so young. Surely there was something you could have done? Coin trusted you. Couldn't you have made her keep my family safe? And even as I write this, one thing comes to mind. No one in safe in the arena. And that couldn't have been more true.
I hope your life has come to something, that you've found happiness. Someday, maybe, I'll pick up the phone. I don't know. I'm living each day to its fullest, one moment at a time.
Goodnight,
Katniss
A/N- thanks so much for everyone's support. This is the last letter of this story. I want to thank everyone who followed/reviewed this often so I'm posting acknowledgments very soon!