A/N All Twilight character's belong to Stephenie Meyer

I talked to my marine friend for a while yesterday...he said its normal for there to be a bit of PTSD going on..but it won't be a huge issue here, so yeah..this is just sorta a fluffy little chapter. On another note, Enchantress in Black wore me down and got me to join Jacob Black n Pack, which is a totally awesome site with just us wolf girls, none of those freaky vampires...lol..so you should join if you haven't already and if you have you should look me up and we can chat or whatevers... http : // jacobblack - n - pack . ning . com / profile / NIkkiAnderson (and if that doesn't work there's a link on my page...)

Jake

I remembered help coming, being picked up, people shouting over me. It came in flashes, bits and pieces of brilliance that, when I thought about it, I wasn't sure if it was real or not. I remembered lying in the dirt, my heart pounding, and seeing Bella, the way she looked the day I first met her, the night I took her to dinner at the Edgewater, the way she looked when I asked her to have coffee with me, the morning after the first night we spent together.

The images compounded, coming together in rapid succession until it stopped on her face, her voice commanding in my ear, "Wake up!"

My eyes flew open, frantically searching for her face. The face of a young nurse in camouflage scrubs stared back at me. "Welcome back Staff Sergeant. We were worried about you there for a while. Do you know where you are?"

I looked around, taking in the beeping machine, the flickering green line monitoring the beat of my heart, the sickening anti-septic smell and said, "The hospital?" My tongue felt thick, my mouth dry. I glanced around for something to drink. "Can I have some water?"

"Sure thing." The nurse crossed the room and poured some water into a cup from a pink plastic pitcher. She carried it back across the room and handed it to me. I accepted the cup and took a long swallow, draining it.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. You are in the hospital, but do you know where?"

I shook my head no. "I remember the explosion… and trying to help, then collapsing."

"That's correct. There was an explosion; several members of your convoy were injured. The field team stabilized you enough so that you could be transported to Landstuhl Regional Medical Center in Germany. That's where you are now. You had to have surgery to repair a punctured and collapsed lung, but you're going to be just fine."

A punctured lung, I thought, well that would explain why it felt like my lungs were on fire. It would also explain why chest hurt. I pulled back the well-washed cotton gown and peered down at my chest. There was an angry purple bruise around the wound and eleven neatly tied stitches.

"Pretty gruesome huh?" the nurse grinned.

"Yeah," I said feeling a little woozy. "Pretty gruesome. What was in my chest?"

The nurse shrugged. "They aren't really sure; it was something from the explosion, metal, about six inches long, no more than an inch wide. But like I said, you'll be right as rain. Once we're sure you're going to live, we're sending you back to the states."

"I'm going home?"

The nurse nodded, her curls bouncing up and down. "Yes. I'm going to check your temp and then be out of your hair."

"Okay."

The nurse came over, holding out a thermometer, which I accepted, sticking the hard plastic under my tongue and waiting. When the handheld device beeped she took the thermometer, shooting the plastic cover into the nearby trashcan. "Alright Staff Sergeant. I'll be back in a little while to check on you, if you need anything, the call buttons right there, you just press on that and someone will come assist you. And there's a phone right there in case you want to call your family and let them know that you're okay."

I glanced to my left and saw the white phone waiting on the table. "Thank you," I called as the nurse disappeared out of the room, the door sliding shut quietly behind her. I waited for a moment before I reached for the phone. I didn't know who to call first, my parents or Bella. Knowing Bella, though, she was probably at my parents and had probably been there since she found out about the accident.

Then I had a thought. What if she hadn't heard?

I pushed the thought from my head. Her and my mom were tighter than Kenny Chesney's blue jeans. My mom told her, she had to have told her. I picked up the phone and dialed Richard and my mother's house in Tacoma, idly wondering what time it was there as the phone continued to ring.

Finally a sleepy voice said, "Hello?"

"Mom?" I croaked my throat still somewhat dry.

"Jake!" she cried. "Jake, oh my god are you alright?"

"Calm down mom I'm fine-

"Oh my god I was so worried. They came and told me there was an accident and that you were hurt but you were fine…that was the last I heard. It's been two days...where are you? Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes mom, I'm fine. I'm in the hospital in Germany. I had to have surgery, but I'm fine. I just spoke to a nurse she said I should be fine. Did someone tell Bella what happened? Is she okay?"

"She's all right sweetheart, she's actually here. She called me the morning of, she heard it on the radio, I didn't get a chance to call her first. She's staying at the house. She's been a wreck, worrying about you, but I told her you were a trooper and she shouldn't worry."

"Can I talk to her?"

"I have to wake her, it's still early here. Hang on."

"Wait mom, don't worry about it, don't wake her, she should sleep, I can call back later."

"Are you sure?" Sarah asked. "I'm pretty sure she wants to talk to you."

"Yeah I'm sure mom. I'll call back in a couple of hours and talk to her then. How's she been?"

Sarah sighed. "Not too well. She hasn't really taken this well. She came down the night we found out after she got off of work and she's been here since."

"Oh."

"I tried to tell her," Sarah said, her tone adopting that 'I'm a parent and not trying to sound condescending but it does anyway' tone.

I sighed. I never wanted to put her through this and yet was doing it anyway.

"Sure you don't want to talk to her?"

"Yeah mom, go ahead and put her own."

"Hold on son."

I waited, listening as my mother climbed out of bed, the covers rustling, springs groaning in protest.

The bedroom door opened and my mother's bare feet slapped the polished wood floor before coming to a stop. She knocked softly at the door and I briefly wondered whose room Bella was sleeping in.

Mine probably, I decided.

I heard the door open and Bella say, her voice full of fear, "What's wrong? Is it Jake? Is he okay?" My mother's soothing voice travelled across the line as she calmed Bella and handed her the phone.

"Jake?" she said and I could hear the sleep and panic in her voice.

"Hi beautiful. How are you?"

"I'm better now," she cried. "I was so worried about you." Her voice trailed off and I imagined her chewing on her lower lip. "So worried."

"I'm sorry," I said glancing up at the ceiling, feeling the weight of her emotions press down on me from across time and space. "I'm so sorry; I never wanted you to have to go through something like this."

"It's the life," she said wisely. "Its all part of being a military girlfriend, right?"

I smiled. "Right," I agreed. "Are you okay, my mom says you've been at the house since they got the news?"

Bella let out a shaky breath. "Um…I don't know how I feel. I heard it on the radio on my way to work and then the assholes started talking about pulling out and cracking "that's what she said" jokes. I think my heart quite literally stopped when I heard the whole report." She sighed, her breath crackling in the phone. "Are you sure you're alright? You're not like, lying blind and hooked up to life support in a hospital room and calling to say your final goodbyes are you?"

"No," I laughed. "I'm lying in a hospital bed hooked up to this incessantly beeping machine with some stitches and a wound that will make one gnarly scar, but that's about it. No life support and I'm definitely not blind and I'm coming home in a few days."

"I know, your mom told me. Are you really sure your okay?"

"Yes Bella, I am fine. My chest hurts a little, but aside from that I'm fine. Now do me a favor please. Stop worrying okay?"

"Okay," she said. "I'm so glad you're okay. I was so scared."

"Me too," I told her. "You wanna know what I saw right after the blast, right before I blacked out?"

"What did you see?"

"You," I whispered. "I saw you."

* * *

The time in the hospital went by quickly. A few days after the surgery my doctor came in – a no-nonsense lieutenant - and handed me my discharge papers and a plane ticket back home.

"You're good to go. There's a prescription for some painkillers incase there's any discomfort with the injury. Make an appointment with your regular doctor at home and go to emergency room if you have any trouble breathing – that includes shortness of breath, wheezing or chest pains, or if the wound does not heal or becomes infected. There's a script in there for an antibiotic cream that you should apply to the wound twice a day, after showering, swimming, or any excessive sweating. You're on light duty for six weeks, no heavy lifting, no upper arm or bodywork outs. Take it easy, take care of the wound and you should be fine. Any questions?"

"No sir," I said accepting all the papers he handed me.

"Alright then Staff Sergeant, take care. Semper Fi."

"Semper Fi," I replied.

When the plane landed is Seattle I disembarked and walked through the terminal, the strangeness of déjà vu washing over me. Just like the last time I came home Richard and my mom were waiting as was Bella. She looked thinner than I remember, her eyes sparkling but not enough to detract from the bags under her eyes. She looked like she hadn't slept since I left.

I wanted to run to her, to grab her in my arms and hold her. I restrained, fearing I'd tear my stitches, then tossed caution to the wind. I jogged toward her, and grabbed her, my face buried in her hair, breathing her in, feeling her arms around me, her tears on my shirt.

I picked Bella up and held her, she cried into my shirt, saying something I couldn't quite understand. Happy tears filled my eyes as the pieces clicked into place, the feeling of being whole again washing over me. I set Bella back down; she looked up at me, her brown eyes swimming in tears.

"I have missed you more than you can even imagine," I told her.

"I don't think so," she said, wiping at the tears on her face with the sleeve of her – my – sweater. "I missed you pretty damned bad to. Nice shirt, by the way."

I looked down at the tee shirt she'd given me before I left and smiled, then I looked at hers and said, "ditto."

She smiled and carefully laid her head on my chest. "I don't ever want to let you go again," I said into the top of her head.

"I think you might have to, just for a minute so you can say hi to your mom and dad."

"Come on," I said, letting go of her waist and claiming her hand. Sarah and Richard stood back, out of the way of the other travelers, waiting patiently.

Sarah started to cry when I walked up to her and she rushed toward me. "Welcome home."

"Thanks mom. It's good to see you."

"Its good to see you to."

Sarah released me from her embrace and leaned against me for a moment. "You had us all so worried. How do you feel? Does it hurt?"

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to worry everyone. I'm fine, I feel fine, not it doesn't hurt. Let's get out of here. all these people, it makes me a little nervous."

Sarah nodded and motioned to Richard. He walked toward us. "Glad your home safe, son," he said.

"Thanks."

We collected the one bag I had and I worried about the rest of my stuff, which was still in Iraq. I hoped the guys had enough sense to bring it back with them. With my bag in tow we walked out of the airport into the rainy afternoon. As we walked toward the parking garage my heart raced and I skimmed the levels for anyone that might be lurking there.

Bella caught me looking and gazed up at me, concern clearly written all over her face. "Everything okay?" she asked.

I nodded and rubbed my thumb along the back of her hand. "Everything is fine."

It wasn't a lie but it wasn't necessarily the truth. I knew after my "ordeal" there was bound to be some lingering issues; even if they didn't immediately surface. That was a lesson I learned after my first deployment to Iraq. I came home, spent my leave with my parents, and was perfectly fine the whole time. Then I went back to Virginia and something inside of me…broke I guess you could say. I began having nightmares, vivid nightmares, and I started sleeping with a gun under my pillow. One night I almost shot my roommate when he came home from a night out on the town. Him and another friend of mine got me help and I moved past it.

The second time I came home it wasn't as bad and I returned to my previous therapist. My third tour was fine; I came home and was fine. But nothing like this had ever happened to me, I'd never seen combat I guess you could call it. I was there in the thick of it, but I'd never been involved in firefight or roadside bombing until now. I made a mental note to call my therapist in Virginia just in case. Better to be safe than sorry and accidentally kill someone.

I followed Richard to his car and the four of us climbed in. As we left the airport Sarah turned in her seat, gazing at me from over her shoulder. "Your sister's at the house," she said, "and Rachel, Paul and the baby are flying out later this week."

"Oh cool. How is Rebecca?"

"She's good. Claire had the baby, it was a boy, they made her give it up for adoption. Kit is pretty upset about the whole situation. He wants to take Lelei to court for full custody of Claire."

I turned to Bella. "Kit is my brother in law, the Samoan surfer Rebecca married. Lelei is his ex-wife, Claire is-"

"His daughter who was 13 and got pregnant by a guy named Luke in her science class. She had sex with him in the bathroom during a dance at school."

I gaped at her.

"I've met Rebecca and Kit as well as the infamous Claire, who, if you don't mind my saying so, is in desperate need of a spanking. She's a piece of work."

"Tell me about it," Sarah muttered. "I keep telling Rebecca...but she just says that Claire's not her daughter and it's not her right to discipline her."

Both Bella and my mother clucked their tongues in disapproval and I marveled at just how much, exactly, I missed.

"Yeah well, mark my words, little Miss Claire is going to find herself in that same position again if she doesn't get a much needed attitude adjustment."

Bella murmured her agreement. She flexed her fingers then held tightly to my hand. "I'm so glad you're home."

I dropped a kiss on her head and said, "Me too. I can't wait to get you out of that shirt."

"Ooh naughty Special forces," she giggled playfully. "I like it."

I smiled at her little pet name for me. I found it amusing because I wasn't special forces, and technically, the army had special forces. Marines had special operations but I doubted that would have the same ring as special forces.

Richard pulled into the driveway and no sooner had he shut off the engine Rebecca came bounding down the stairs making a running beeline for the car. I got out and she squeezed me. "Careful Becks, you're gonna tear my stitches."

"Sorry little brother," she apologized. "You're not dying, no broken parts, nothing like that?"

I shook my head no, feeling like a broken record constantly repeating "I'm fine" and "I'm sorry." I was going to have to get a shirt made that read, "I survived Iraq and kept all my original parts." And on the back have them put, "and yes, I'm fine, now stop asking."

"I'm fine," I repeated for the umpteenth time since getting…shit what did I get? Injured? Bombed? Shot by a mysterious projectile? Impaled? I liked impaled, but it held a certain connotation that implied I'd been tortured with small stakes or something. Screw it, I decided, impaled it is. "I'll even show you my stitches if you really want to see."

Rebecca made a face, her skin turning slightly green. "You'll do no such thing Jacob," Sarah scolded.

I held my breath as we walked into the house, bracing myself for a chorus of "welcome homes" to ring out, but none came and I exhaled slowly. "There's no one else here?" I asked just to make sure.

"Nobody but us," Richard said. "We figured after everything you've been through that wouldn't have been appropriate."

"Thanks," I said. "I appreciate that."

"No problem. I'm gonna grab a drink, do you want something?"

I nodded. "I'll come with you." I turned to Bella and said, "I'll be right back. Do you want anything?"

"I'll have whatever you're having," she said.

I left her with my mother and sister in the living room and followed Richard into the study. Kit met us as he came out of the bathroom and joined us in the study for a drink.

"Now that the women are in the other room," Richard said pouring two fingers of brandy into a crystal tumbler. "Are you really okay?"

I nodded and accepted the drink. "I'm fine. I think I might need to see my therapist when I get back to Virginia, just to make sure I really am okay, but I feel fine, a little skittish, but that normally passes after I've been home for a few days, you know, readjusting to life where every guy hanging out on the street corner isn't trying to kill you."

Kit sipped his drink and nodded. "I know what you mean,bro. my buddy Ike had PTSD. It was a nightmare. He thought his uncle was a terrorist and almost killed him."

"Well let me know if you need anything," Richard offered. "Whatever you need."

"Thanks, I appreciate that." I took another sip of my drink, enjoying the burn of the expensive alcohol. I looked up at Richard. "How is Bella, really, I mean?"

Richard shrugged lithely. "She's one tough cookie. She came down to see your mother every other weekend, they went to yarn shops and out to lunch and shopping for this that or the other. Your mother adores her. Then this news. I guess she heard it on the radio and called just as your mom was about to call her. She went to work then came down afterward, had dinner, mom offered her your room if she wanted to stay. She accepted and she's been here ever since. For the first few days she laid up there crying to herself, but after you called she seemed better. That girl really loves you Jake."

I looked up from the glass in my hand. "I really love her too."

Reviews are better than Jake making it home in one piece

If you've made the mistake (yes mistake..they totally screwed that movie up) of seeing Dear John, yes I totally stole the "I saw you" line from that... ;)

Chapter Title

How You Survived The War by The Weepies