A/N: Mello has only one comment on the next e-mail: "WTF? Weirdo. But I appreciate the honest attempt at being stupid/entertaining." Quote unquote. (Reminder: The first 4 best i.e. not one-liners, unique and funny questions sent by email will have a better chance of being answered).
From: The Chick Three
Subject: PFFFFFFFFT!
YEAH RIGHT, BLONDIE, MATT SOOOOO LOVES ME MORE! Just ask him. He'll tell you. xP He'll say "Oh I think if I go with this girl I will not have my face blown to smithereens. Sounds good." AND I'll have you know I could kill you! -pulls out a bazooka- WHANNA GO, GIRLY MAN?!
Anyways. So Mello, I totally had a dream with you in it the other night. Twas very odd. You were a student in my school. It started off just me in class but we were being taught by Jack Skellington. That was probably a result from me watching the Nightmare Before Christmas before I went to bed. (Ever seen that movie? Eh.. moving on) And you were having in trouble in math so I had to help which is terribly off because I fail at math. I mean, you're the genius, do it yourself But anyways. As I was helping you with a problem (all I remember is it being a bunch of numbers on paper) when you brought out a chocolate bar. I yelled at you to pay attention and stole your chocolate. But then I began to eat it for myself. It may have been dream chocolate but it was very good. But of course you got all pissy and threatened my but I just said "MMMMMMMMMMMMM this choclit ish sooooo good! -sticks out tongue-" And then you ran out into the hall yelling "I'LL GET YOU FOR THAT BETCH (just as soon as I get more chocolate)" And you left me alone in a room full of creep Halloween Town characters. That wasn't very cool I was alone and afraid. SOOOO I followed you out in the hall.
When I went out into the hall it turned out to be all jungle-like which is ironic because I had another dream one time where the halls of my school were all jungle-like. But that was last year and that dream had nothing to do with Death Note characters. MOVING ON. I saw you talking to my friend, Anna, who was asking you wear you got your pants and you were all like "GUCCI PANTS YAYAYAY" And I was like "ehhhhhhhhh..." but then I saw my friend Ginger riding in elephant in the halls and I just HAD to join because I love elephants. So I hop on the elephant with Ginger and Ginger yells "GO, ELEPHANT, GO!" But the elephant curtly replies "My name is Lindsey. " And I was like "Ew-wowwwwwwwwww" Because it had a man's voice. Now it reminds me of Lindsey Lohan, which I find rather humorous. So we the elephant takes us off to the 7th grade wing of the school. I pass lots of teachers and people on the way there and I'm overjoyed to see my science teacher being eaten my a lion. D But that is random. And then I see my whore-of-a-friend, who's name is Liz, talking to Matt. I know this only because Matt is a red-head and Liz is attracted to red-heads (NOT AS MUCH AS ME)(She has an obsession with that Shaun White-snowboarding-man who I do not expect you to know) but she is comparing Matt to a character from a book she read whose name name is John Miller. And how dare she compare my beloved Matt to some some red-head drummer from a BOOK. Don't you agree Mello? Matt is much better. So this is how it went:
Me: WHORE! -jumps down from elephant- Stop trying to see if Matt wants to be in your stupid This Lullaby cast! He's much too cool than your sissy John Miller.
Liz: SHUT UP! John Miller is awesome and he's not gay with Dexter!
Me: I never said he was you defensive lil twa-!
Matt: -ignores us and looks around, then walks towards Ginger-
And then all the sudden this is happening in Ginger's point of view. Odd, isn't that?
Matt: Hey you.
Ginger: Me?
Matt: Yeah. Have you seen Mello anywhere?
Ginger: I don't know who that is.. :3
Matt: He's a blond guy, probably wearing really tight leather. Has a big scar on his face...
Ginger: OHHHH the new metrosexual kid! Yeah I've seen him. He was talking to this really really short girl that way -points-
Matt: Kay thanks. -walks off-
That was it for you and Matt for awhile. What came next had to do with ferosious tigers, Winnie The Pooh, teachers, and Light and L. I didn't think to bother you with all that because it has nothing to do with YOU, yeh egotistical gang leader. Plus, I didn't want to make this thing twice as long as it already is. I know it's long, I apologize. Gomen. But I have a question, don't worry.
So the next time you come into my dream is I'm riding a heffalump instead with Ginger, L and Light. We're all good friends from a previous dream I had, you see. And we come across you again but you were wearing. Apparently. Anna was SO fascinated with your leather gucci clothes that she just HAD to steal them. Don't worry, she left you with clothes. In fact, she left you with HER clothes, which just happened to be a denim mini-skirt, a corset-top-thing, and leather boots (hell you got something leather). I KNOW this was in my dream because I was reading What Happens At Wal-Mart Stays At Wal-Mart by Fatal Error late last night (you know that kid who thinks you and Matt should play gay chicken. Yup. Them. So you can blame that kiddo for this happening to you in a dream.) And of course Anna is half your size so it's all abit tight. ANYWAYS.
Me: XDDDD Doooooooooood. You're wearing a skirt. That's awwwwwwesome.
Ginger: OH SICK! NASTY! BLECK.
Light: -passes out-
L: What's going on? -peeks from the back of the heffalump ride-
You: '-' Ho shit.
Me: -laughing fit-
Matt: -appears out of the jungle- MELLO I FOUND YO-Whyyyy are you dressed like a chick?
Me: -suffocating-
You: I swear I'll kill that bitch if I meet her again! AND YOU-points at moi-BETTER SHUT IT BEFORE I BLOW YOUR FACE OFF!
Me: AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH-gets shot- Oh owww! D: Betch. And then I died resulting in me waking with a face like "double-you-tea-eff, maties. :/"
SOOOOOOOOOOOOO This dream resulted in me having a few questions for you. :3
1. Do you actually enjoy cross-dressing? C'mon. You don't look to bad in skirts.
2. Are you any good with dream-interpreting? Because WHAT THE HECK DOES THAT ALL MEAN? I'm not sure is being a genius allows you to understand what someones dream means. If not, I can always ask Near. D
3. Do I get an award for having the LONGEST e-mail sent to you?! That was a whole lotta shiz I typed for you and I should get something. Then Again. I hope you're not perturbed about having to read so much.
Le Poussin Trois (French this time because I'm cool. Though I have no idea if that's right...)
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Dear The Chick Three,
HAH! AT LEAST WE CAN BUY HIM CIGARETTES LEGALLY! And he says he can't dare leave his apartment nearby that's filled with ultra-rare posters of the Super Mario Brothers from 1997. So there. –sticks tongue out- Don't even try! He doesn't want you! HE LOVES MEEehh…lons! He likes Melons! –phew!-
That's a really weird dream. Aside from that, it's also a really stupid and random dream. But the fact that I'm in it makes it a freaking awesome dream. WTF, mini-skirts? Tell your friend Anna to drink some growth-pills so that if I have to wear her clothes, at least make them fit!
1. What do you mean ENJOY? I haven't cross-dressed in my life! My pants are in the men's size! Only small!
2. Hm. I think that dream means that you are mentally deranged, an idiot, and one of my ultimate fangirls. Well? Did I get it right?
3. Award? Sure. You get my fist konking your skull. But I won't give you only that award because you made me read more than I would since the Whammy House. So congratulations! You get BOTH my fists konking your skull!
Sincerely, Mello
ps. Betch? Hm. That's a good one. I'll use it sometime.
A/N: Again, thank you for the strange question, The Chick Three. XD; I had to take out some smileys again because they won't show up properly. Hope it's okay. And OMG, it took me a while until I understood what "double-you-tea-eff" means. And I think this calls for changing the story rating… Er. Hehe. Please mail your Qs to: snowrabbit399(at)gmail(dot)com.
