-SCULLY- 21
"Hello, Dana," my mother said as she entered the kitchen where I was helping myself to another pudding cup. My stomach was kind of upset and I was hoping that the instant puke inducer would relieve some of the queasiness.
"Hey Mom," I said, opening the pudding, the aroma already easing my stomach. Maybe, if I was lucky and God was in good spirits, I wouldn't have to eat it.
"I've been meaning to talk to you," she said, slowly. I stopped opening the pudding and all thoughts about it flew from my head. Here we go. Since she caught Mulder and I kissing yesterday, things between my mother and I had been semi strained. She avoided things that she usually would have pounced upon as a chance to talk to me. Now she was going to lecture. Like I didn't know the risk having a relationship like was. "Yesterday, when you and Mulder were," she began, but stopped, I think waiting for me to fill in the blank.
"Kissing?" I prompted, trying desperately to find the word she was looking for so that this prolonged agony would wrap up as quickly as possible.
"Yes, you were kissing I guess." She said, her voice sounding as if that word did not completely satisfy her.
"What do you mean 'I guess'? That's what we were doing. We were kissing, Mom," I said, exasperation peeking out in my voice.
"Yes. I suppose so. But you were kissing for a long time, and it seemed very extreme," my mother said, sounding somewhat flustered and panicky.
"Mom, call it what you want, but we were kissing, nothing more, nothing less," I said, smiling as I thought of Mulder. I brushed my fingers of my lips, thinking of his pressing to mine, soft and wonderful. He was indescribable, almost as much as my feelings for him were. Since we had kissed, words that appropriately depicted the emotions that I was feelings towards him, for him, did not readily come. I was at a loss for words, just as Mulder had been before our kiss.
"Yes, dear, but I'm not sure if this is the best idea. How long have you been seeing each other?" She asked, the maternal worry present every way imaginable. It was to be expected. What mother wouldn't be somewhat perturbed by the sight of her teenage daughter and a boy they were fostering kissing in the doorway of his bedroom? Any normal mother would, even one laid back and a bit of a romantic like my mother.
"We aren't seeing each other! It was one kiss!" I replied, exasperatedly trying to get her to understand my position, and failing miserably.
"Dana, even between teenagers a kiss means something. Don't deny what we can all see."
"There is nothing to see! Please enlighten me, how do you see something that isn't there?" I asked, lashing out. Was I missing something? Was there as sign stuck to my back? What could everyone see that I couldn't?
"Dana, there's no need to be rude. I'm simply stating that you should not take this relationship lightly. If anything between you and Fox goes awry, think how awkward living together and sharing all the same classes will be." My mother pointed out, admonishing me for my moment of anger. I studied her position. If things did end badly, she would be one of the most likely candidates to reap what we had so poorly sown. She didn't deserve that. She was right. I had to be careful.
"You're right Mom. Mulder and I need to take a step back and examine very carefully what direction this relationship is headed." I said, nodding, my actions agreeing with her as well as my words.
"So you admit that you would like to have a relationship with him? You want something more than friendship? If that's so, you couldn't have made a better choice in my opinion. Fox is so courteous, a real gentlemen," she continued about Mulder's perfection and I tuned her out, disagreeing while simultaneously agreeing with her. Mulder could be a knight in shining armor at times, but having said that, he could also have horns, a pitchfork, and a pointy tail.
"I really do think that I would like Mulder and I to go somewhere," I said, when she had finished her rambling, adoring monologue.
"I would be pleased to see that. You two would be excellent for each other. You are so serious, so demure, and if you'll figure me, a little uptight sometimes. He rounds out your sharp edges. He's fun and laid back. You complete each other," she said, dreamily clasping her hands underneath her chin. There was that romantic part of her. My mother, the Matchmaker. She always did have a thing for Fiddler on the Roof.
"Please Mom, wait until I get some food in my stomach. You know how I hate those dry heaves." I said, rolling my eyes at her. She glared at me. I held up my hands in surrender.
"Now that we have the basis of your feelings resolved," she began. When exactly did we do this? "We have a completely different conversation to begin. With you two in a relationship, the age you are at, and the housing situation, it would be more than convenient for you two to engage in sexual activities, right under your father and my noses." She looked right into my eyes when she said 'sexual activities', like this was supposed to embarrass me or something. It did, but I wasn't about to let her see that.
"Mom, trust me, we just kissed. Sex is the last thing on my mind. I can't speak for Mulder," I said, smiling as I thought of his jokes and innuendo. I really could speak for him. I knew that he respected me and my wishes too much to do anything that would hurt me.
"Oh, Dana, be reasonable. It's not like you haven't thought of him sexually," she said suggestively, waggling her eyebrows at me. I instantly thought of the day he caught me in a towel and then the day I caught him in one. She was right again. The scoreboard now read Mom – 2, Dana – 0. I could never win.
"Mom! What are you insinuating?" I asked, waggling my eyebrows right back.
"I'm not insinuating anything. I'm merely stating that I was a teenage girl once. I know what you're feeling and the kind of things that a boy like Fox stirs up inside you. And I'm saying that teenage boys aren't the only ones with sex on their mind." My mother grinned wickedly and winked at me. I was tremendously surprised, slightly disturbed, and mentally changing to scoreboard to Mom – 3. Anytime my mother talked about her days as a pubescent young adult, I usually tuned her out. Rude, yes, but who wants to hear about their parent's glory days? That's what bingo nights in the nursing homes are for.
"Mom, I never took you for perverse," I said, giggling slightly. My mother never ceased to surprise me.
"There are many things you'd never take me for, but I used to be or still am," she teased, almost begging me to ask her. But she had already won, the scoreboard standing. I wouldn't admit defeat, and I wouldn't throw her a bone.
"Is this where you tell me you've secretly been living a double life and you're some secret agent and I was the product of some one night stand?" I asked playfully, hiding the white flag or surrender.
"You were not the product of a one night stand, you smart-aleck. You were the product of one night of passion," she said smiling, an unfamiliar suggestive tone creeping in her voice.
"EWW! Mom!" I said, screaming wildly. I did not need to hear that. Not at all. She winked at me and I bolted from the room. I was feeling much better, much less queasy after that discussion with my mother. I think I threw up in my mouth a little. That could very well be why my stomach had settled and my mouth tasted awful.