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Sunflower Fanfiction and Mari, thank you for being smart.

Chapter 21: Unexpected Words

Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does.

Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up.

James A. Baldwin. ~

We arrive back to Forks earlier than I thought we could and Charlie drops me off at Edward's house. He told me to try and end this day on a happier note. And that it was what my mother would've wanted. He told me it was what he wanted.

"I just want to see you happy again." He had said when I argued about it. I told him that developing a relationship with him would make me happy. It was hard to get it out, but I couldn't bring myself to not say it.

"That would make me happy too." He choked out.

At the end, I decided to go to Edward's house because I know that what happened today was really intense. I think we both need some time to let the heaviness go. But most of all, because I know we both meant what we said, and we are going to try to be close.

I feel it and it's amazing.

I feel secured and not so scared anymore.

"Jeez, Izzy, is not that cold!" Alice tells me when she opens the door and evaluates my clothes. She also tells me this, while pushing me inside the house and hugging me with too much strength for such a small girl.

"I know." I tell her, getting rid of some of the layers I'm wearing.

"You look cute, but if you're planning on seducing Edward, you have to show more skin." She says with a smirk on her face.

"What are you talking about? I'm not planning on seducing anyone." I tell her.

"Why not? You should."

"No she shouldn't." Emmett says, making his way down the stairs with a grin on his face. "Edward doesn't need to be seduced Ali. He already has balls the shade of the freaking Cookie Monster. She just has to say the word, and he'll jump her bones." He finishes with a wink when he reaches us.

"Oh God." I say mortified, and probably bright red. They both chuckle and Emmett hugs me in greeting and as mock comfort to my predicament.

"Hey! When did you get here?" Edward says appearing out of nowhere with a box in his hands. He looks amazing in a black knit sweater and black beanie. His eyes look full of life and excitement.

"Just a few minutes ago." I answer as he places the box on the floor before walking closer to me. Alice and Emmett move out of the way at the same time as if in sync.

"Hi." He tells me softly, lowering his mouth to mine to give me a small peck. I feel warmth spreading all over my body. His lips are soft and sweet and I nip him, wanting to get more of it. He places his hands on my waist and is too happy to comply.

"Get a room." Emmett yells, and Edward ends the kiss. "Oh wait, don't." Emmett continues. "I don't want to be near you when you two finally do it." He says chuckling. Alice giggles.

"Emmett, fuck." Edward says annoyed.

"What? I'm just saying…" He starts, but Edward is already making his way out of the room with me in tow.

"Please walk with me." He tells me even though we're almost arriving to the kitchen.

He closes the door behind him and pushes me against it.

"Hi." He breathes, his hands cupping my face.

"You said hi, already." I tell him softly, but I'm leaning in to kiss him.

"Yeah, but not like this." He says before meeting my lips.

We kiss aggressively, then slow, then fast again. I feel like the world is ending and he's my life source. He's grabbing my hips, my hair and my face; as if he doesn't know which part he likes best. I find the back of his neck with one hand and grip the front of his sweater with the other.

He stops, panting into my face and hiding his face between my neck and shoulder. I've learned he does that a lot.

"I'm sorry." He whispers to my skin, causing goose bumps to erupt. "I'm just so happy to see you. Are you okay?" He asks, leaving his cocoon and searching my eyes.

"I'm…good." I say. He looks skeptical. "Or not as bad as I thought I'd be." I add with more certainty.

"Oh, well that's great. What about Charlie? How'd it go with him?" He asks, stepping away from me but still close enough to touch.

"It went…" I take a moment to find the right word, "fine." I say, not being able to come up with a better way to describe today.

"Yeah?" He asks, taking one of my hands in his.

"Yeah, kind of…really good. I mean…not, yeah…it was good." I stammer. It was a strange day. Edward seems to understand that he won't get many coherent thoughts out of me and decides to not keep asking.

"I'm really glad to hear that." He says with a big smile. He nods towards the back door and pulls me to him. We walk hand in hand towards our secret place.

I can hear his family inside the house. I'm not sure how many guests they had tonight, but it couldn't have been that many. I didn't run into anyone while I was inside.

"He was so different than what I thought he'd be." I say when we get to our favorite spot. "You were right." I say facing him.

"Now I'm really glad to hear that." He smiles and nudges me.

"Ugh, shut up." I roll my eyes and push him back.

"Fine, fine, shutting up now." He holds his hands up in a surrender gesture before taking my hand again. "Are you hungry? Did you eat?" He asks switching from playful smugness to caring concern in just a second.

"Actually, I ate." I say and tell him about the pancakes. It was hours ago, so I should be hungry again, but I'm not. Edward listens to my tale without interrupting, not sure how to react. I smile at him when I'm done to let him know it's okay.

"Wow, babe, that's amazing." He finally says with a big smile on his face.

"It is." I start and then I freeze. "Wait; did you just call me babe?" I ask in shock.

"Um, maybe? He sort of answers with a worried look on his face.

"Huh." It's all I can manage.

"You don't want me to call you that?" He asks with a hint of panic. "It just kind of slipped out." He adds as a second thought, playing with my fingers.

"It's just such an Edward-the-ladies-man thing to say." I think out loud.

He snorts.

"Well, then it's obviously a no."

"No, I don't mind." I say quickly.

"Sure you do." He tells me, giving me a knowing look.

I shake my head. "No. I really don't."

He snorts again.

He has no idea where my mind is going. And since this day has been just a lay-it-all-out kind of day, I decide to tell him.

I tug his hand to get his attention. I want him to understand where I'm coming from. He faces me and I take his other hand in mine.

"I've been watching you with other girls for so long, Edward." I start and he flinches. "Calling them pet names and touching them, flirting with them." I go on. I can feel the tension overcoming his body. "I never thought, that…well, that one day you'll be directing those antics to me, and I guess, meaning them?" I finish, sounding uncertain. He's silent for a minute or two and I think that maybe I didn't make myself very clear.

I didn't tell him this to hurt him or because I haven't forgiven him because of what happened. It's the contrary in fact. I feel comfortable enough to tell him this.

I forgave him, but I think he hasn't forgiven himself.

I open my mouth to say something else, but he stops me.

"Bella?" He says, gripping my arms now. "I love you." He says, fixing his piercing eyes on mine. "I'm in love with you. I feel like maybe you know, but I needed to tell you. I've had…all this inside me for what feels like forever. I've lost myself trying to hide from you, but at the end I can't deny who I really am. And what I am is a hopeless guy, who'd give you the world. I've fucked up so bad, so many times, but I love you. I love you so damn much I feel like—" I stop his rant with a kiss.

He groans into my mouth and holds me to his chest. I stand on my tip toes and grip his hair. My mind is blank. I think of nothing but Edward. I feel nothing but Edward. I breathe nothing but him.

My boyfriend.

My best friend.

"If it wasn't obvious, I love you too." I say, trying to get my breathing under control. He smiles and gives me small pecks in response.

"So can I call you babe?" He asks me, chuckling.

"Shh." I whisper and we kiss again until we're called back inside.

"How's Charlotte?" I ask Peter while I wait for Edward to get out of the bathroom. After Thanksgiving break, school has been different; quieter. People seem to be too distracted with their own business to pay attention to mine. I'm thankful for that.

Tanya and the Blondies have reduced their bullying to nasty looks and the occasional whispering. It's better than confrontation, and I'm thankful for that as well.

Peter shrugs against the locker his body is resting on, mumbling an incoherent response to my question. He hasn't been around much since Charlotte got here. He's been missing school a lot and we just haven't been able to talk.

When I saw him get here this morning, I was excited about being able to catch up with him; see if he was okay.

He looks the same; dark jeans, black jacket, the bad boy stereotype. But there's something off about him. Like his presence is not commanding and strong anymore.

"She's okay? Is that what you said?" I ask him again trying to get him to talk to me.

"She's fine, Swan." His voice borders on frustrated, then again, he always talks like that.

"And what about you? How are you dealing with things?" I ask, searching his eyes. He looks to the other side of the empty hall.

"I'm fine." He answers. I push myself away from the locker and get in front of him. He's about Edward's height so he's taller than me. I have to look up at him.

"I know you're probably lying." I say, and he rolls his eyes at me, then looks to the side; everywhere but me. "Listen, if you want to talk, if you need any—"

"Fuck, Swan," he interrupts, as he walks past me, talking as he goes. "Just because you're all touchy-touchy with your emotions or whatever, doesn't mean the rest of the world is too, okay?"

"That's not—" I start to protest but he stops me again.

"I get you're happy with Cullen and want to go puking rainbows in everyone's face, but just back off." He says and retrieves his backpack from where it was on the floor. Of course Edward comes out of the bathroom while Peter is shouting the last part of his outburst at me.

"What the fuck? What's going on?" Edward asks shooting an angry look to Peter and a concerned one to me.

I'm stunned into silence at Peter's reaction. Is that what I'm doing? Wanting the world to be a better place so that it matches how good I finally feel?

I don't think that's it.

I care for Peter. I owe him much of my happy state, and I just wanted to know if he was okay. His response only proves the fact that he isn't.

"Nothing. Tell your girlfriend to mind her own business." Peter answers and is already walking away from us.

Edward's in front of me before I know it, cupping my face in his hands.

"Are you okay? What the hell was that?" He asks me, as I shake my head in answer, and out of his hands.

"Nothing."

He groans.

"Bella," He says my name like a warning.

"It was nothing. I pushed him to talk, he exploded, no big deal." I say, taking my bag from the floor and tugging his hand to walk with me. He takes my bag from me, but doesn't let go of my hand.

"Didn't look like nothing to me. He looked pretty upset." He says.

"I know, I don't think he's okay. I'm worried." I say as we get to the parking lot.

"Maybe you should give him time."

"He's had time. We haven't talked in forever." I say annoyed.

"Just because you haven't talked, doesn't mean he's had time. Maybe he's been busy trying to make sure Charlotte was okay instead of worrying about himself." Edward says, opening the passenger door for me.

I ponder what he said while he settles into the driver's seat.

"That actually makes kind of sense." I think out loud and Edward smiles before starting the engine and driving out of the parking lot. "Which is why I need to get him to talk to me! He must be dying inside, having all that bottled up and trying to keep Charlotte safe and happy." I say and Maybe Peter kind of made sense earlier, too.

Edward chuckles.

"What?" I ask.

"You're just cute when you have that look on your face." He says and pushes the accelerator.

I frown and stay silent for a minute.

"What look?" I finally inquire.

"The I-just-realized-what's-going-on-and-maybe-how-to-fix-it, look." He answers simply.

I frown again.

"I have that look?" I ask him while he parks in front of my house. He turns off the engine and faces me.

He nods. "Among other ones." He says taking my hand in his. "See? Right now you have the I-have-no-idea-what-the-fuck-Edward's-talking-about look." He chuckles and kisses my fingers.

"You're crazy." I tell him and give in to the sensations of his lips on my skin.

"Mmm," He consents and kisses my wrist. I take the opportunity to cup his face and bring it closer to mine.

We make out for a long time. It never gets old. His kisses, his touch, his closeness…I don't get tired of it.

If anything, I just get more addicted.

His sounds, his skin, his smell…all part of the spell I'm under.

He stops kissing my lips to land soft kisses all over my face.

"What look do I have now?" I ask gasping for air.

"The I-just-made-out-with-my-very-hot-boyfriend, look." He answers and kisses me again.

Peter was right. I feel like puking rainbows.

"Bella?" Charlie's voice makes its way to the kitchen. "I brought pizza." He says, entering the room with two pizza boxes in his hands. He places them on the table and I stop chopping the vegetables I was going to cook.

"Oh?" I say confused. This is unusual. "I was making dinner." I add as an afterthought.

"I guess I should've called first." He says, and I notice sadness overcome his face.

"It's okay." I tell him, starting to put away the food I had on the counter. "I'll just save this for tomorrow." He tries to help me, but we end up bumping each other the entire time. Eventually he gives up and sits down at the kitchen table to start eating his pizza.

I fetch some drinks and join him.

"We need practice." He sighs tiredly, rubbing his face with both of his hands. I finish chewing the bite of pizza in my mouth before answering.

"Yeah," I agree. "We'll get there." I tell him, and his whole face changes.

He clears his throat before asking, "How was your day?"

And just like I've been doing this entire week, I really tell him.

After dinner with my father, I convince Edward to drive me to Peter's house. He wasn't very happy about it and he also wasn't jumping at the idea of just dropping me there.

I'm thankful I won that debate as I stand in front of Peter's grandma's house, ringing the bell for the third time. I'm about to leave when the door opens half way. I can barely make out the person on the other side.

"Hello?" I ask, placing one hand on the door, trying to open it further.

"How can I help you?" A soft, almost angel-like voice comes from the other side.

"I'm looking for Peter." I say, and she opens the door a tiny bit more. I can make out golden hair.

"He's not here." She answers and tries to close the door.

"Wait, Charlotte!" I yell and stop her. She opens the door then, and looks at me with a shocked face.

"How do you know my name?" She demands, but she's so frail looking it doesn't seem demanding.

"I'm friends with Peter. He told me about you." I tell her.

"I'm not supposed to let anyone in." She says, giving me a sideways look. "I'm not even supposed to open the door." She adds almost to herself.

"It's okay." I smile at her. "I'm Bella. I won't tell anyone," I add. Her face changes when I say my name and she doesn't look so apprehensive anymore.

"Are you the girl who sent the clothes and stuff?" She asks, and I notice all of the clothes she's wearing, used to be mine.

"Yeah…" I nod.

"Thank you." She says sounding genuine.

"No problem." I tell her. "Listen, I just wanted to make sure Peter's okay." I say, letting her know I mean no harm.

Her face crumples, but her tone is bitter. "Well, he's not."

I consider this for a moment and decide not to question her about him. I need to talk to him, not find out about him from her. It doesn't seem fair.

Looking at her though, and seeing how broken and lost she looks, I decide to ask about her.

"Are you? How are you?"

She looks surprised at first by my question. I'm sure she wasn't expecting that.

"I'm fine. I'm safe." She tells me and it sounds so untrue. I don't know this girl, but she doesn't look fine. Her answer sounds more like a mantra; a learned line she has on repeat.

I'm about to speak when a screeching sound makes Peter's presence known. He marches toward us as soon as he's out of the car.

"Damn it, Swan!" He yells. "What the hell are you doing here?" He asks me when he gets to us, grabbing my arm.

"I was just—" I start.

"Not minding your own business." He finishes my sentence for me in an angry voice. "Char, can you wait inside?" And it's amazing how everything changes when he talks to her. We were never going to work. He's so in love with her.

"Why? She already knows who I am." Charlotte challenges him, as he lets go of me and takes her hand.

"It's not about that." He tells her in a low voice. "I just have to talk to her."

"And I can't be here, why?" She questions him, meeting the adoring look on his face with furious one.

"It'll be quick, Char. Please." He begs her, cupping her face in his hands. Suddenly, I feel like I shouldn't be here. I feel like an intruder in their world.

"That was not what I asked, Peter." She says softly, surrendered to his touch. Their dynamic is intriguing.

"I should go." I say, ready to walk back home if Edward doesn't get here right now. Peter snaps his eyes to me.

"Yes, go." He says in his cold, no nonsense voice.

"No, don't." She tells me. "I'll just go hide inside, like I've done for weeks." She says, giving Peter a look and walking back inside.

"Charlotte, please…" He groans but she's already out of sight.

"Peter…" I murmur, unsure of what to do.

"You had no right coming here! None." He screams and I flinch.

"I'm sorry." I say, but he ignores me.

"What did you think you were going to do? Come here and force information out of her? What do you gain from that?"

"Peter, no. I wasn't going to do that. I came looking for you. I want to talk to you." I try to reason with him, but his face doesn't soften at my words.

"Well, I don't want to talk to you." He says in a monotone voice. I consider trying to convince him to open up, to rely on me, but I'm not sure I will accomplish anything tonight. I nod at him and pull out my phone to tell Edward to pick me up.

"Edward will pick me up soon, don't worry." I say bitterly.

He doesn't speak or acknowledge me. He does, however, wait until Edward arrives, car before going inside the house.

I decide that I'll try again tomorrow.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy Almost-New Year.

Thank you so much for reading and making this year one of the best ones

with your kind reviews and your patience.

Next update will probably be up in a couple of weeks.

Till next time,xx