A/N: Meeeeep! I admit it - I'm officially the worst updater ever. Seriously, if that were an Olympic event, I'd win gold. The truth is, postgrad is a whole lot busier than I imagined, and I'm even having trouble keeping up with my fanfic reading, let alone writing! It's madness! Forgive me? -batts eyelashes- Well, hopefully this scene makes up for some of the wait. And there is just the Finale left to go - not long now! I absolutely promise not to make you wait as long this time - that would just be plain cruel! :P Anyway. 'Unusual Way' is dedicated to DeliaDee, who has been a huge support and just recently sent me a PM, inspiring me to carve out time for this - and I know she was hoping for this song to appear! Hope I do it justice ;)
26. Unusual Way: Unusual Way (Nine)
27. You're In Love: I Won't Say I'm In Love (Hercules) (hehee, this song makes me giggle :D)
SCENE SIX:
[The set is doused in darkness for a few moments, before a line of orange streetlamps provide us with light again. It is early evening, and we are in an empty street – for now, at least. For we begin to hear the sound of running footsteps, and seconds later, GWEN, TOSH, IANTO and OWEN burst onto the stage from the right. GWEN, OWEN and IANTO are all carrying guns, while TOSH is clutching her PDA.]
GWEN: Tosh, where's it gone?
(The note of urgency in her voice keys us in to what the team is up to.)
TOSH: Wait – let's stop a moment, looks like he's being tricky again.
(ALL come to halt, panting slightly, still keeping a close watch on their surroundings in case whatever they're tracking shows up.)
OWEN: God, only a bloody Blowfish! Why they choose to keep hanging round boring old Cardiff, is anyone's guess...
GWEN: (shooting OWEN a glare)
Oi! What's wrong with Cardiff, exactly?
OWEN: Would you like an alphabetical list, or a chronological list?
IANTO: (half attempting to distract both GWEN and OWEN, and half actually worried)
Owen, are you sure one of those bullets didn't hit you?
(The team, including TOSH – who looks somewhat more alarmed and anxious than GWEN and IANTO – turn to look at OWEN. We notice now that his shirt is bloodstained, as he is minus his usual leather jacket.)
OWEN: Of course I'm sure, I'm a bloody doctor, aren't I? Nah... this ain't my blood. Belongs to the poor sod that... that we had to leave behind.
TOSH: (gently)
You did all you could, Owen. We know that Blowfish can be lethal when they want to be.
(There's a moment of silence in which TOSH and OWEN's gazes are locked, OWEN's eyes having softened slightly. GWEN and IANTO exchange half-amused glances – as amused as they can be, given the situation – and GWEN clears her throat. OWEN grunts and tightens his grip on his gun as he rips his eyes away, and TOSH hurriedly refocuses on her PDA.)
Okay, I've picked up his signal again, looks like – hang on – he's doubling back?
(She looks up at this, as if she expects to see the BLOWFISH standing in front of her. The rest of the team all raise their guns again.)
Towards us?
GWEN: That doesn't make any –
(But before GWEN can finish, a BLOWFISH skids into view from the left side of the stage. He has familiar red skin with fish-like features, and is also wearing a maroon suit with an orange tie – we've seen this particular BLOWFISH before. He's dragging a young blonde girl alongside him – and holding a gun to her head. OWEN, GWEN and IANTO all direct their guns at him.)
OWEN: (snarling)
You again! God, I knew Jack shouldn't have gone all soft and let you out of our vaults!
BLOWFISH: (sneering with delight)
Unfortunately, rehab didn't really help!
OWEN: (in an undertone)
What a surprise...
GWEN: Let her go – she's got nothing to do with this.
BLOWFISH: Oh, but I get so lonely – it's nice to have a bit of company every now and then.
(He digs the gun into the girl's head a bit deeper, and she gives a quiet sob.)
Besides, how else was I meant to get your attention?
OWEN: Yeah, I think killing an innocent man back there definitely got our attention!
GWEN: (taking a steadying breath)
Let her go, and then we can talk about what you really came for.
BLOWFISH: Ahh, but I'm not sure that we can. Where's your loveable leader?
(GWEN, TOSH and OWEN dart uncertain looks at IANTO.)
IANTO: He's – not here.
BLOWFISH: Finally woke up and saw how pointless this little team is, then? Can't say I blame him.
GWEN: (a steely note in her voice)
Look, whatever it is you want –
BLOWFISH: I want Jack, but as you don't seem to be able to help me there –
(Without warning, the BLOWFISH tosses the girl at GWEN, who catches her, quickly beckoning OWEN forwards to check for any injuries. Too quick to let anyone react further, however, the BLOWFISH raises his gun and points it straight at IANTO.)
– I'll just have to satisfy myself with his Eye Candy, instead!
(IANTO swallows, but the gun in his hand remains steady. GWEN has her arms full with the upset girl, and OWEN appears torn between tending to her and thinking of some way to help IANTO. TOSH is still clutching her PDA, and it makes beeping noises as everyone stares at each other.)
TOSH: Detecting massive levels of adrenaline, mixed with approximately three grams of – of cocaine. This fish is wired!
BLOWFISH: (grinning)
More fun that way!
IANTO: (forcefully, albeit shakily)
What do you want with Jack?
BLOWFISH: I owe him something...
OWEN: (sarcastically)
Oh, yeah? Leant you a couple hundred quid, did he? You're playing the good citizen, are you?
BLOWFISH: (sneering)
I owe him a bullet in the head! He murdered my brother!
OWEN: Good god, there's a whole family of them...
(The BLOWFISH loses his amused smirk and snarls angrily at OWEN. He takes an aggressive step towards the team, shrinking the gap between him and IANTO, who the BLOWFISH's gun is still trained on. The whole team flinches.)
BLOWFISH: You think you're the perfect teacher's pets, don't you, blindly following his orders even when teacher's gone. You all think you're such heroes – but you're not! All I see is a bunch of kiddie-kids, trying to be grown up.
(The BLOWFISH turns his head to look at each team member as he mentions them, but keeps his gun trained on IANTO. The team all appear to be a tad shell-shocked, and can't do anything but stare in horror and listen to the BLOWFISH.)
We've got the doctor, splattered with the blood of yet another person he couldn't save. The carer, trying to comfort even while she can't control her oh-so-beating heart. The technician, with only her cold devices to keep her company at night. And the office boy, promoted beyond his measure for shagging the boss, then trying to fill the boss' shoes after he left!
IANTO: (gritting his teeth and sounding as if he is struggling with his emotions)
You shut up about Jack!
BLOWFISH: Look at you! Lost without your master, pretending to be so brave – but you're all so scared!
(The BLOWFISH cackles now, throwing his head back for a second. IANTO twitches, his gun hand shaking for a moment, but he doesn't take the opportunity to shoot the BLOWFISH – and before he can, the BLOWFISH is lowering his head again and staring evilly at him, his gloved hands – if that's what they are! – tightening around the gun and trigger.)
You won't shoot before I do. I can see it in your eyes. I can see fear in your eyes. And you know what? You're right to be scared. Because you're about to die, office boy.
(OWEN, GWEN, and TOSH all make noises of protest – GWEN and OWEN are holding their guns at the BLOWFISH, but seem unwilling to startle the BLOWFISH into actually shooting IANTO.)
What about it, minion? Are you going to try and prove me wrong? Can you? Dare you? Would you?
(Suspenseful silence before...)
Won't you?
(A gunshot rings out across the street – but neither the BLOWFISH nor IANTO, nor indeed GWEN or OWEN, have fired. The BLOWFISH, however, crumples to the ground, blood decorating the pavement, and IANTO jumps and whirls around. The team stare at him, before... JACK half runs, half bounces onstage.)
JACK: (grinning)
Hey, kids! You miss me?
(There is a long silence, in which IANTO, TOSH, GWEN and OWEN all gape, frozen, at JACK. The young blonde who the BLOWFISH had kidnapped lets out a howling scream – sounding more terrified than earlier, if anything – and bolts offstage. JACK sighs.)
Great – who volunteers to be on Retcon duty?
(Still, no one answers him. JACK's smug smile slips, and he blinks at them all. His eyes slide over TOSH, over GWEN and OWEN, and end up settling on IANTO, who turns to statue beneath his gaze. The girl's scream seems to have woken them up a bit though, and all of the team slip their weapons back into their holsters. JACK follows suit, and places his hands on his hips, looking slightly muddled.)
Uh, guys? I know Retcon duty isn't always the greatest, but I did just save your lives, so the least you could do is –
GWEN: (suddenly interrupting furiously)
You left us, Jack!
JACK: (mouth hanging open)
Well – yes, but come on, surely you can survive a day or two without me –
OWEN: A day or two? Try over three months!
JACK: You – what?
(JACK swallows and looks to TOSH, perhaps hoping for some logical solution, but she glares quite uncharacteristically –
and scarily – back at him.)
TOSH: Three months, four days, and... about six hours, if you want to be precise.
JACK: But... three... three months?
GWEN: Yes, three bloody months! We knew nothing, Jack, nothing about when you might return, or where you were –
JACK: (a tiny smile curling around his lips)
I found my Doctor.
OWEN: (coldly)
We figured.
JACK: (finally looking utterly confused)
But I was only gone for a day, two at the most – and the Doctor, he said he'd drop me right off when I'd left – we accidentally landed at Telosporidia, you see, he said the TARDIS had been playing up since – ohh... right.
TOSH: (with her eyebrows raised, looking pointedly at JACK)
Right.
JACK: But I... I didn't mean to be gone so long. I...
(He shrugs helplessly.)
I'm sorry.
(JACK's eyes return to IANTO, who still hasn't said a word, or moved a muscle, it appears. A flash of agony flies through JACK's face, and he takes a placating step towards IANTO.)
OWEN: Well? Did this doctor 'fix' you, then?
JACK: (with a poor attempt at his usual flirty, joking tone)
What's to fix? You don't mess with this level of perfection!
(Understandably, none of the team crack a smile at this. JACK mumbles something like 'tough crowd' and shuffles his feet nervously. When he next speaks, it's in a quieter, more humble voice.)
No. He couldn't fix me.
OWEN: (not particularly sympathetically)
Pity! Want me to have a go? I've got a new set of scalpels that I've been itching to try out...
(JACK blanches and inches furtively away from OWEN, closer to IANTO. IANTO seems to have been steeling himself, because he now straightens and holds himself rigidly, before speaking abruptly.)
IANTO: Are you going back to him?
(At this, JACK loses his focus on the other team members, eyes on IANTO, who stares right back – although he is now trembling slightly.)
JACK: (quietly)
I came back for you.
(A missed beat, during which IANTO and JACK's gazes are locked onto each other. JACK clears his throat.)
All of you.
(OWEN snorts softly, while TOSH looks sideways at IANTO in concern, and the glower GWEN is directing at JACK darkens. JACK looks wildly around at them, before hastily moving to stand a couple of feet away from IANTO.)
Listen, I...
(JACK shoots another glance at TOSH, GWEN and OWEN, but they give no sign of leaving them or allowing them any privacy.)
How are you, Ianto?
IANTO: (swallowing and looking just over JACK's shoulder)
All the better for having you back, sir.
JACK: (the corners of his mouth turning down)
I thought we'd gotten past the 'sir' by now.
IANTO: (icily)
So did I, sir. But then, that was before you left for three months without even leaving a note.
JACK: It's not like I planned for this to happen! I mean, yeah, I had always planned to go with the Doctor when he showed up, but that was before you and I – and I didn't know he'd drop me back three months later – it's not like I had time to write a note, the TARDIS doesn't always wait for passengers, especially unannounced ones, you know!
(IANTO glares fiercely at JACK, who looks suitably chastised.)
Sorry. That was a pretty bad apology, huh?
IANTO: Oh, you were apologising just now?
JACK: (mumbling)
Something like that.
(He looks back at IANTO, a hint of desperation in his eyes.)
Ianto, you have to listen to me. I mean, while I was away, I was thinking. I realised that Cardiff had become my home – I didn't wantto travel the universe with the Doctor anymore. I finally have somewhere that I belong, for maybe the first time in my life – and that's saying something.
(Music begins to play, and IANTO and the rest of the team prepare to listen to JACK's song.)
['Unusual Way']
JACK: [sings]
In a very unusual way
Ever since I met you
In a very unusual way
You caught my eye
Maybe I just didn't know
Maybe I didn't want to see
But now I can't let you go by
(JACK reaches out to close the gap between him and IANTO, placing one hand gingerly on IANTO's cheek. IANTO looks like he has stopped breathing, concealing all reaction.)
In a very unusual way
I think I'm in love with you
In a very unusual way
I feel alive...
(Removing his hand from IANTO, JACK takes a step back, into the centre of the stage, readying himself to get into the song.)
Something inside me grows strong
Something inside me feels at home
And you're the reason why
You help me survive!
You must know what you do to me
You must have a clue!
Can't you see what it's like to be me, looking at you?
It scares me that I can belong somewhere...
(JACK holds out a hand to IANTO, suspended there for a few long moments – IANTO's expression impossible to read – before slowly, IANTO reaches out to take JACK's hand. JACK lets a hopeful smile begin to form on his face as he sings the next verse.)
In a very unusual way
I owe you more than you'll know
Though I admit I've not always stayed
I will not go
Special to me in my life
Since the time I truly saw you
How could I ever forget you
Once you had touched my soul?
(Here, JACK sweeps around to kneel at IANTO's feet, still holding his hand.)
In a very unusual way...
You've made me whole!
(The music drifts away into a melody, eventually melting away to silence. The look of sincerity on JACK's face is clear – but IANTO is biting his lip, his body trembling again just noticeably.)
IANTO: (weakly)
I... Jack.
JACK: I mean... what I'm trying to say... maybe we could, you know... dinner, a movie...?
IANTO: (stammering a bit)
Are you a-asking me out on a date?
(JACK clears his throat and lifts his chin to look at IANTO properly.)
JACK: Interested?
IANTO: (coughing)
Well...
(IANTO casts a furtive look over at GWEN, TOSH, and OWEN, who were all listening to JACK's song. TOSH seems to have mellowed, giving IANTO a small smile. GWEN and OWEN look less convinced, but gesture for IANTO to keep going. IANTO sighs, shaking his head, and releases JACK's hand. JACK clambers to his feet and waits for IANTO to respond. Music starts up again – a slower tune at first, but this time moving to a quicker beat.)
['You're In Love']
IANTO: [sings]
If there's a prize for blinded mistakes
I guess I've already won that
No man is worth the constant heartache
That's such a waste of time
Been there, done that!
(GWEN, TOSH and OWEN move to stand in a line, hands on hips, all facing IANTO, to join in the song.)
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
Who'd'you think you're kidding?
Jack's the universe to you now
You can't keep it hidden
Ianto, we can see right through you
No, you can't conceal it
We know how you feel
And who you're thinking of
(IANTO is shaking his head – there's no way.)
IANTO: [sings]
No chance, no way
I won't say it, no, no
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
You've moped, you've moaned
Why deny it, uh-oh!
IANTO: [sings]
I won't do this
I won't say I'm in love
(Here, JACK takes a step forwards and opens his mouth eagerly to speak, but IANTO silences him with a firm shake of his head.)
I thought my heart had learned its lesson
Everyone you love just leaves you
I can't help thinking I should stop now
Unless I'm dying to rip my heart out!
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
You keep on denying
Who you are and how you're feeling
Ianto, we're not buying
When Jack left you hit the ceiling
Face it now or never
Are you gonna ever
Say you've got, got, got it bad?
(At this, IANTO can't help but let a small smile spread over his face – but he still shakes his head.)
IANTO: [sings]
No chance, no way
I won't say it, no no
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
Give up, and give in
Check the grin, you're in love!
IANTO: [sings]
I can't do this
I won't say I'm in love
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
You're doing flips, read our lips
You're in love!
(GWEN, TOSH and OWEN now look thoroughly unconvinced by IANTO's protests, all grinning broadly. JACK, who has his hands buried in his greatcoat pockets, is smiling fondly at IANTO. IANTO himself is looking half amused, half exasperated.)
IANTO: [sings]
You are so wrong
I won't say it
This can't belong
I won't say it
GWEN, TOSH & OWEN: [sing]
No, don't be proud
It's okay, you're in love
IANTO: [sings]
Oh...
At least out loud
I won't say I'm in love...
(The song finishes, and IANTO finally meets JACK's gaze. GWEN, TOSH and OWEN all exchange knowing looks, and move to one side of the stage.)
JACK: So... was that a yes?
(IANTO shakes his head again, but this time, it's not a denial.)
IANTO: Yes... yes.
(With a blinding grin on his face, JACK leaps forward to IANTO and their lips finally meet in a deep kiss, JACK's hands on IANTO's waist and IANTO's arms winding around JACK's neck. OWEN wolf-whistles while the two girls beam at each other. When they break apart, JACK and IANTO share another smile before JACK squeezes his arm around IANTO's shoulder, and they turn to the rest of the team.)
JACK: Right! Team – we have a mission to complete.
(JACK and OWEN pick up the dead BLOWFISH by the arms and feet. GWEN and TOSH lead the way offstage in pursuit of the girl they need to Retcon, and IANTO follows them with JACK and OWEN bringing up the rear. The stage darkens, and then colourful flashing lights burst upon the stage from every direction, fast music beginning in anticipation...)
Sure hope that was entertaining! I'd love to hear your thoughts :) And only the Finale to come...!