Drifting Thoughts

"Kyle..?" I sat there dumbfounded. Why was he here? Why was Kairi here? Wasn't it like four in the morning..?

"See, she does remember you," Kairi giggled and playfully socked the guy in the arm.

He rubbed his arm and chuckled, "Okay, you were right." He hobbled over to the chair next to my bed, "How you been?"

Kairi set the flower bouquet on the bed stand and stood behind the chair. "Are you okay, Nana?"

"Y-yeah…" I cleared my throat and faced away from them. Why did they bother to come see me; especially him?

"I had no idea you two knew each other." Kairi smiled at me. She set Kyle's crutches aside so they wouldn't fall over.

He laughed softly, "She used to help me out a lot last year," his grin faded, "Until she just disappeared one day."

"Disappeared?" Kairi looked at me curiously.

"Oh right, you transferred here just this year." Kyle rubbed his neck, "Well…"

"It's nothing Tsugumi…"

Kairi and Kyle turned to me. I blushed at the attention and turned my body completely away from them, hugging my knees. "What happened in the past stays in the past…" I mumbled.

"Nana?" Kairi came over and tried to meet my eyes, "Are you feeling okay? Do you need more water? Should I get the nurse? What—"

"I think she needs some time alone," I heard Kyle tell Kairi.

"But she's…"

"Besides, it's pretty late. I think she's tired…"

"You're right but…"

"She's a strong girl. I know she'll be fine."

I blushed and burrowed my face in my arms. I heard the door open.

"Come on kids, it's way past your bedtime. We only let ya'll through 'cause you said she was an important friend."

"Come on, Kairi." I heard Kyle get onto his crutches and the sound of clacks and footsteps echoed in the room. I heard Kairi thank the nurse for letting them come and they left.

"Now, lights out for you, miss." The nurse came up to my bed and tucked me in. "I had to send your other friends home too and I told them you were gonna' be fine."

"Thank you…" I rolled to the side and faced the wall.

"Anytime sweetie." She turned out the lights and left as well.

I sighed. Important friend, really? Don't make me laugh… I closed my eyes. Ryan was going to be fine. The guys are hopefully safe at home. I should be out of here in the morning… I yawned. The silence in the room felt so foreign. The familiar sounds of Arthur shuffling in his bed or Alfred staying up late playing computer games were absent. The room was cold and silent. I felt so small and alone in the blank, silent room. I pulled my knees closer to my body. I need to sleep now... drift into my wonderland…. The last thing I heard was the rain that was starting to fall outside.

Eerie music played; like a distorted orchestra. I opened my eyes and found myself lying in a patch of green grass. I was in the middle of some sort of dark forest. I stood up and saw that I was wearing some type of combination of a dress and an armor, with a sharpen blade in hand. There was a red spade tattooed on the back of my hand.

"What in the world..?" I examined the sword and found splotches of red on it. I gasped when I realized that it was blood. I tried to toss the sword to the ground but my hand would not allow it; it was tightly grasping it. My body started moving on its own and my arm started to slash at the air, then whatever foliage that was in my way, then eventually shadowed bodies.

"Stop!" I shouted as I hacked another body to its death. My body stopped on command. I stifled a sigh and as I was trying to sheath the sword, strips of shadows emerged from the forest. They grabbed hold of me, covered my mouth, coiled around my ribs.

Let go! I reached out for a tree branch but eventually my whole body was engulfed by the arms of darkness.

My heart paused in its beating as if I had died for a second. When I came to be, I found myself standing on a small stage in the middle of some sort of town square.

"What just happened..?" I blindly looked around and saw people waiting, waiting for something. I glanced down at my wardrobe- dress pants, a scarf, and a blue rose pinned to my vest and blouse. This time, a blue diamond was on my hand. When did I make a costume change? I was about to jump off the stage when I lost control of my body again.

I walked to the center of the stage and cleared my throat. I pulled out music sheets from my pocket and started singing. I didn't want to sing. Why was I singing? The crowd cheered. Then the cheers turned into screams. When I opened my eyes after holding some note, skeletons had replaced the villagers. Horrified, I managed to shut my mouth and stepped back. My hand moved on its own again. It loaded a revolver. My eyes widened as it pointed at my head. A shot echoed through the square. I died again. I think.

"With a twisted grin, this dying man lay breathing his last breath…"

"Did you say somethin', hun?"

I lifted my eyes open, to actual reality, I hoped. I blinked as sunlight streamed through the open window. The nurse from last night was replacing my bandages. I glanced over at the clock on the wall. 11:00 am… Wow…

"How's your head?"

"Better…" I sat up and muffled a yawn.

"It didn't look like you slept well." The nurse tied the bandage on my arm in place and handed me some pills.

I scratched my head and took the pills. I drained the water down my throat. "How is Ryan..?"

"Worryin' about your friend before yourself," she sighed, "What to do with you. He's been slowly recovering over night. The doctor's giving him a check up so he'll probably update on ya' later."

"I see…" I stared at my sheets. It's all my fault and because of me, he's missing out on school too… School… I clenched my fist. That's it…

Someone knocked on the door. I broke my train of thought and glanced up. Francis walked in and greeted the nurse.

"I came to pick up ma petit {my little} princess." He winked at me. I blushed and turned away.

"Perfect timing," the nurse held up a clipboard, "Just sign these papers and she'll be all set to go."

After he signed the papers, we went to visit Ryan but the doctor wouldn't let us in and told us to come back later. We left the dreadful hospital. We walked down the street from the bus stop and eventually got home.

Francis searched for the keys in his pocket. "You were quiet the whole ride, ma cherie," he found the key ring and picked out the one for the house.

I stared blankly at the door, "I know…" What was there to talk about?

He sighed and messed with my hair, "You think too much."

"Hey," I brushed my hair in place and gave him a look.

He only chuckled and finally unlocked the door. He let me through first and I was greeted by a tackle hug. I landed on some pillows conveniently lying on the ground.

"Ve~ Welcome home, Nana!"

"T-thanks?" I tried to pry Feliciano off. My heart was beating rapidly from the sudden attack.

Alfred grinned and helped me up. Arthur scolded Feliciano for acting too rash on someone who was just discharged from the hospital. Ivan waved at me and welcomed me home as well.

I looked back at Francis, "What's this all about?" The entire house seemed to be completely cleaned and organized. I glanced over to the dining room and saw a bunch of food set up, even rice. When was the last time I had rice? That was the minus of having European units- they don't exactly eat rice on a regular were little deformed riceballs piled up on a plate.

"Just a little gift from us," he smiled warmly at me. He then hugged me too.

"Ve~ me too!" Feliciano hugged me again.

"F-for what?" I felt myself blushing. Did I miss something?

"Don't leave the hero out!" Alfred joined them.

Another pressure added to the bunch after him. I looked up and saw Ivan.

"Come on Artie," taunted Alfred, "You're family too."

Arthur blushed a little and sighed in defeat. He joined the group hug.

Family..? I closed my eyes. I wanted to shove them all away but I couldn't. The love was too much, too much at once. After a few more seconds, they finally let go.

I dropped to my knees and stared at the ground. Finally…

"Ve! Are you okay, Nana?" Feliciano knelt down next to me.

I nodded and closed my eyes. Clean house? Prepared lunch? Group hug?... It's like the time when it was my mother's last birthday… I was only at the hospital overnight…

"Hey."

I opened my eyes again and saw Alfred holding up a tissue for me. I blinked and realized that I was crying. I took the tissue and dried my tears, and blew my nose. They would go this far for me, huh?

He grinned and helped me up. "Let's feast!"

Everyone scrambled to the table and waited for me to come. I smiled shyly at them. Silly guys… I joined them and enjoyed deformed riceballs, sandwiches, and desserts that Mr. Ciro and the bakery dropped off for me.

Few hours later, everything settled down as usual, as if nothing really happened. Only the feelings remained but everyone busied themselves with something. Alfred and Ivan left for their jobs, while Feliciano took his siesta and Arthur went out to look for jobs.

I stretched back in my chair in my room. It was only yesterday that all this happened. The bloody images kept reoccurring in my head. I sighed and decided to go out. I changed into jeans and a hoodie and went to the front door.

"Ou es-tu aller {Where are you going}?" Francis whispered across the living room. I forgot he was still home. I still wondered what he does on the weekdays when he doesn't work.

"Just getting some fresh air," I slipped on my shoes, "I'll be back soon."

"I'll go with you," he set down the newspaper and stretched.

I opened my mouth to object but decided I wanted to have some kind of company with me, "…Okay."

We walked down the street for about ten minutes, in silence. Where to go… where to—I looked up and realized I was walking by the school. There were some kids outside on the field. Probably football practice… I turned my focus to the benches and saw a guy on crutches. Kyle? The guy perked up and waved at me. Yep… I hid behind Francis and we continued walking.

"Comment vas-tu {How are you}?"

I was caught off guard, "Quoi {What}?"

Francis chuckled and put an arm around my shoulders, "I love how you respond to French normally…"

I blushed, "I-it's not my fault…" Okay, probably was since it was the only foreign language I was interested in taking… that was before I found Hetalia.

He nuzzled his nose again my hair, "Would you like to go anywhere else, ma cherie?"

I scooted out of his grasp, still blushing madly. What's with all the affection today? Francis is Francis so that's normal for him… I suppose… "No, I'm out of places."

"Perfect." He peered down at his watch, "I wanted to show you something." He grinned and took me by the hand. He led me down the street, toward the park.

"What, where, huh?" I looked at our hands and then up at him. Where are we going?

We went past the park, past the grand tree, and climbed up a hill.

He finally let go when we got to the top. "Voila~" He swept his hand across the scene.

I cocked my head in question and looked out, "Wow…" I breathed. I walked further to the end of the little hillside. Faded images of mountains ran long the horizon, with miniaturized buildings and cars scattered about in the valleys. The sky was beautiful and clear, blue that went on and on into the distance. Butterflies danced about around the patches of flowers that dotted the hill. I took a deep breath. I felt refreshed somehow.

"I never been here or seen anything like this before…" I leaned against the wooden post on the line of fences.

Francis stood next to me and took a deep breath as well, "C'est beau, n'est-ce pas {Isn't it beautiful}?"

I nodded and gazed out into the scenery. I felt like all my worried drifted into the vast sky. I rested my chin on my bandaged arm. I wished my mother saw this…

"Do you feel better now, ma cherie?"

I glanced up at the Frenchie. Is that why he took me up here? I smiled and turned back to the vast sky, "Sure."

He laughed softly, "That's good."

I wish I brought a camera… I watched a car run along the ribbon of road. It was like a little ant crawling inside the sidewalk crack.

I felt arms wrap around my waist. I flinched and glowered at Francis. Okay, good mood right now and all but hands off Frenchie…

He only held me tighter and rested his head against mine. "Now…"

"Now what?" I raised my arm to elbow him.

"Do you mind telling me all that you have in mind?" he whispered.

I lowered my arm, "Why..?" My problems are only for me to worry about…

"You don't deserve this torment, ma cherie. You can just tell moi; I won't tell anyone else…"

I felt my ears turn red. I faced him to tell him off but he had such a look on his face that made me shut up. He was worried, like a mother that was worried when she saw her child come home with a scraped knee. I casted my eyes down at the ground and sighed.

"There's no need to strain yourself with all your worries," he put a hand on my cheek and lifted my head to face him, "Big brother's here for you."

Big brother…? Big sister..? There was a throbbing in my throat. I bit my lower lip and hugged him in defeat. I was wearily. I needed someone. If he was willing to listen, then fine.

Pause.

Yay I'm back! Kind of… I wasn't on hiatus or anything, just extremely busy (and a hint of lazy…)

Sorry if this chapter seemed jumpy. I wanted to do too many things at once again OTL.

Okay so recap- Ryan is recovering, Nana is out of the hospital, and Francis is being big brother again. I was sad that I couldn't post anything Halloween related in the story so I dropped some 'nightmare-ish' things in Nana's dream. . . (Sorry Nana~… and interweb cookies to those who know my reference).

Guess what? Real 20th chapter, yay! And 56 reviews, thank you guys sooo much! As promised, I posted an art but it's not exactly related to the story. Let's just say it's to make up for Halloween. (Look up 'MiracleHeart14' on dA... or go to my profile)

Again, thanks so much for supporting me. It makes writing this story a lot of fun knowing that I have an audience ^^;;.

Love you all~ MiracleH.