"Wait, where are you, Kiku? Did you come in here with me?" Feliciano called from the corner.
"Yes, I am here. I did not wish to disturb anyone who is not used to seeing spirits, so I became invisible."
"Well, maybe you can find someone to help if you're visible. You might scare someone if he can't see you."
"Perhaps. I could look for a good deed to do tonight while we are here. I will be keeping watch to see that no one comes to spy on us in the night. Did Doggie-san know how long we were staying?"
"I think he was arranging something with someone else who has a trailer, or maybe someone who has a carriage. I don't know if I can handle getting any more splinters. I can sing them out, but sometimes I accidentally drive them deeper, and I keep finding more of them. I didn't know I'd get my hands this banged up. You don't have to worry about things like that, do you?"
"No."
Ludwig then came into the small room of the inn. "I've arranged with a man to take us to the capital after breakfast tomorrow."
"Has he got a carriage?"
"Horses, but no carriage. You can ride, can't you?"
"I haven't done it in a while, but yes. At least it's not a trailer full of splinters."
"Why were you rolling all over it if you wanted to protect your hands?"
"I wasn't rolling all over it!"
"Yes, you were. I'm assuming that's how you got those big splinters in your sides. That shirt was ripped to its limit by the time we got here. Never mind that. I was told we could get there by tomorrow evening if we keep on the right track."
"Are you going to ride a horse as a big dog-man?" Feliciano asked stupidly with a fantasy clearly in motion.
"Probably not," Ludwig grunted. "Do those fit you all right?"
"Oh, yes, I actually like these a lot more than the other ones," the fairy said cheerfully. He smoothed the chest of his shiny, blue-and-black waistcoat and moved his wings up and down through the tailored holes in the back. His measured trousers fit him perfectly, and he'd chosen thin-leather fencer's boots, claiming with a wink that "they might come in handy." "Hey, I just thought of something funny. What if the changeling is still wearing my clothes and that band of mercenaries come spying on us again? We'd know him right away."
"I wouldn't bet on it," said Ludwig. "They'll probably be smarter about spying from now on. They know we're wary of them. At least one of them is a changeling, and he could disguise himself as anyone. Have you got those scissors on you?"
"I have." Feliciano showed Ludwig the scissors he had been gifted that morning. "Sir Francis wore his on his belt."
"Right. That's a good way to carry them. Make sure they're in plain sight. When you sit at a table, place them on the table. When you sleep, place them next to your pillow."
"I know that, Doggie. I'm from Allegria! We do all of the changeling wards. We've even got magic ones. There's a special ring that Grandpa knew how to create out of stones around our villa. It made this pretty silvery veil appear all around, and we never had any changeling problems when that was up. Amotoile has something like that, too. It's a salt ring all the way around the capital city. I don't know how well it works, but salt rings are supposed to keep out all kinds of devious magic."
"To me it sounds like you are wasting the salt," Kiku said softly.
"I think if even one changeling can't get in, it's not wasted at all," the fairy tutted. "Ahh, I'm definitely hungry again, Doggie. Everyone's down at that cool-looking place by the river. I think I heard familiar music coming from the back. If they ask me to sing, can I join them, Doggie?"
"I have to warn you, Feliciano. You must bring the scissors with you and be prudent about whom you talk to. If you are questioned like you were by Sir Francis, you must come to me."
"I got it. I got it. Hey, what if there are pretty girls there? I hope there are pretty girls there!"
Ludwig hardened his expression. "Are you coming with us, Kiku?"
Kiku jumped. He had been focusing on the glitter of Feliciano's wings, and the inconsequential conversation had been muted. "Well, er, seeing as I do not eat, I do not think I will come with on this particular occasion."
"Aww, really, Kiku?"
"Please allow me to rephrase. I think it will be much more productive if I look for deeds that can be done for the living. I will meet you back here when you are finished."
"Oh, I get it." The fairy smiled and gave a funny mock salute. "Have fun, Kiku."
"Fun…" Kiku whispered, but Feliciano and Ludwig had already gone down the hallway.
"You forgot the scissors!"
"Ah! I'll go and get them!"
Feliciano returned and retrieved the scissors he had so foolishly placed on the night table. He then hurried after Ludwig again, making sure the scissors were fully wedged in his belt loop.
Kiku heaved a sigh."I do not think there is supposed to be anything fun about it. I am burdened. I am supposed to suffer difficulty for what I have done while living. I cannot possibly help people do physical labor or clean or garden in this form. I have been reduced to one who watches and listens and gives advice. I must be creative in how I earn honor sometimes. This quest is proving itself to be interesting."
"Talkin' to yourself over there, burdened one?" Came a voice from the corner. The crane-like spirit had appeared. His stubby wings flapped at his sides, and one leg was curled around another cup of punch. Kiku turned to look at him. He furtively folded his hands to look at least somewhat proper.
"I am contemplating my quest," Kiku said.
"Pretty long one, isn't it? How many deeds have you got yourself so far?"
"One thousand and three."
"Good number. Good number. I'm not for you or against you, but you might want to stay away from the woods tonight. I was just there, and the river spirits are throwing the biggest party I've seen in a long while. They say the rain's got them all riled up. Some frogs were serving the drinks, and you know how frogs are about burdened ones and living folks. I assume it's only a matter of time before they all spill over into town."
"I will be sure to avoid it. Thank you very much."
The crane spirit winked. He tipped his hat crooked and faded into nothingness. Kiku sat on the bed on one side of the room. "I must be careful. I have failed before. It will not be good for me to take a risk here. All deeds lost to simple temptation. Perhaps I can advise my companions to be wary of the night. I am sure that Fairy-ciano would not want to wake with his hair full of water weeds."
Kiku crept to the door. He caught himself raising his hand as if to grasp the handle and turn. Was this the far-off call of his former self working in habit or simply the result of watching his companions do this sort of thing? He shook his head, stood up straight, and walked right through the door.
On the other side was chaos. Lights and colors flashed flamboyantly as spirits of all odd shapes and sizes danced, gambled and popped bottles of liquor. The hallway was full of both laughter and squabbling. Among the highest number of spirits were the frogs. They waddled around on two legs and stuck out their long tongues at unsuspecting spirit flies.
"Eey, we didn' know you was in there," came a croaking voice. Kiku looked down to see a stout, bulging-eyed frog man peering up at him. He flicked his tongue in and out.
"Hello," Kiku said. "Is this a party? I thought you were staying in the woods tonight."
"'Course," said the frog. He offered his long, webbed fingers to Kiku and took his hand. "You saw the rain today, didja not? Rain's good omens. We must celebrate."
"I understand, but must you really celebrate in the inn? I was told you were sticking to the confines of the forest. If you keep to the forest, you will not disturb anyone who may be trying to sleep."
"Are you crazy? Living can't see us," said the frog indignantly. He pointed to a clearly alive young boy wading through the fray with no indication of surprise. "Those your friends or your victims earlier? The whadisit, flitty-boy and his human friend?"
Kiku did not reply. An enormous bullfrog, clearly with the power to touch the living world, was grabbing at the young boy's legs. He was hard of aim, however, and missed several times before grasping both ankles of the unsuspecting one. Kiku abandoned his place next to his frog and rushed forward to knock the bullfrog out of the way. One of his slimy hands still gripped the boy's ankle, however, and he crashed to his knees. The boy swore profusely to which a multitude of crows cackled. An awkward, lonely dream-eater hung in the air silently observing.
"That coulda been a better joke if I'd've gotten both legs," the bullfrog said annoyedly. "Why'd you pull me away? 'E's a living one."
"You could have made him fall on his face. Look at him. He is already covered in scratches. He is probably a traveler."
"Trav'lin' by 'imself?" A crow mocked. "Laughable!"
"Are you burdened? You must be burdened to be a human spirit," said an extremely fat frog perched with his hand of cards.
"When did you die, and how long are you staying?" jeered one of his friends, a lady frog with hot pink lipstick smearing her slimy face. She sipped her glass loudly so Kiku would perhaps hear her.
"I am indeed burdened," Kiku announced, "and I prefer to do good for people rather than to give in. The living are very interesting to be around, though I do not find the spirit world offensive. Please do not mess with them while you are here."
The laughter continued behind him, but he tensed his shoulders and walked to where the young boy was opening a door at the end of the hall. "I hope they did not scare you," he said softly.
The boy shrieked. "Who's there?" He turned, and Kiku, who realized he was not entirely visible, stood back a few steps.
"I am a friendly spirit. I prevented some unfriendly spirits from tripping you."
"Somebody said this place was haunted," the boy said in a quavering voice. He then scowled. "If that's the case, then thank you. But seeing as I don't trust the undead, I'll not be requiring your assistance anymore. Good evening, sir." He pulled open the door to his room and slammed it.
Despite the victim's sour attitude, Kiku once again felt a small piece of his burden lifted away. He stood in this action's wake and absentmindedly took a glass from a toad full of sparkling liquor. He brought it up dreamily, and just as the cool liquid touched his lips, he felt a horrible sinking sensation, as if the weight of the world were crushing him. He instantly dropped the glass, making sure not one drop had come into his mouth. He found it dry and sighed in relief, then glowered at the toad who scurried away to serve other guests.
Kiku waded through the jeering again and exited the inn. Frogs and other spirits lined the streets and seemed to be everywhere but in the woods. He kept his head down and walked circuitously through the crowd. Here and there oblivious residents of the living world walked right through party guests and tables with no reaction. They streamed lazily from their workplaces to go home or to go and enjoy a time of merriment like Kiku's companions. Music drifted through the air on a cool evening breeze. Flutes and fiddles could be heard from just beyond a wall of decorative hedges hanging with lanterns. Voices of men and women carried into the sky, and the sound of clapping broke on every beat of mellifluous joy.
"I am burdened," someone said. The voice was deathly quiet and hollow. Kiku turned to see the dream-eater from the inn following him. Its milky eye stalk was curved in shyness.
"You are?"
"I gave up long ago," said the dream-eater. "It is a long and difficult quest. I was most unfortunate to be swayed into forgetting the joy of honor. I don't remember what I even used to look like. I can only feel the shadow of living mirth in the dreams I encounter."
"Are you perhaps the same dream-eater who crossed me in the forest not too long ago?"
The dream-eater drifted slowly behind him. "Yes," he said simply. "Do not worry. I was fortunate enough to find some other travelers that night. Their dreams were the sweetest I have tasted in years. They were ambitious men. Ambitious but troubled, each with his own burdens and dreams."
"Ah, do not think I wanted to offend you by leaving you," Kiku said with a small smile. "I am very glad you were able to find some wanderers that night.
"Not at all. You are a spirit. I maintain respect for others in our realm, especially because you have taken on the task to restore yourself to the living. I do wish you good luck."
"Thank you. It has been an interesting journey for me. Several times I have been offered the food or drink of the spirit world, and I have longed for it like a living man would."
"Such perseverance is fit to admire. I am going into the forest tonight. It seems the men I feasted upon have been following you."
Kiku stopped. "They have been following us? Is this the group including the changeling and the demon?"
The dream-eater folded his hands and closed his eye. "A changeling, bursting with optimism yet harboring inner doubt. A fairy, locked in a pride that defends him from a hateful society. Two humans, one who imbibes and one who heals. A demon, hard yet soft. And this morning entered with them the strange creature."
"Strange creature? Hoofed, by chance?"
"Hoofed. The body of a man and the body of a great hoofed animal working in harmony as one. I do not know much about him. I only first saw him this morning."
"So the animal Doggie-san saw is a part of the group now. I must inform him and Fairy-ciano of this. Thank you very much for telling me."
"I haven't much else to do. I do not really fit in here with this raucous partying. I am going into the forest to seek quiet. I will build another cabin tonight."
"I wish you well."
"The same to you. I do hope we can meet again."
"Maybe we will."
The dream-eater drifted silently toward the forest looking pleased that he had been able to talk to someone. Kiku guessed that such a spirit would not usually be regarded as friendly except in the case of eating nightmares, and one would usually not receive much conversation. He gave a smile to the sky and looked back upon the merriment of the spirit world. The chance meeting had given him new motivation to continue on his quest. One day, he assured himself, he would be able to amble through the crowd and neither see nor hear it.
In earnest, he went to relay the dream-eater's message about the strange, hoofed creature to his companions.
The light of two rainbows shimmered in through a window as Arthur walked along the corridor behind the beautiful woman. Her tight, blonde curls bounced with every step she took, and her silken white dress flowed behind her as if she were a cloud drifting aimlessly through the sky on a cool spring day. He looked above him to see the high arches of the castle stretching into the universe. The walls were lined with ornate paintings of fairies wearing noble threads. He gave a sigh of happiness and smiled. What could the queen want from him on such a perfect day as this?
"Come along, Arthur," she said in her lilting, unreal voice. Arthur quickened his pace to walk side by side with her. She turned to him and gave a smile of contentment by his presence. Her eyes twinkled with powerful magic. Her ears were perfect, pointed and proud. Her pleasured countenance made Arthur smile back, and he felt his heart speed up and heat rush into his cheeks at her recognition. Shameful, shameful, he thought. But I am a lord…
"Why do you request my presence?" He found himself asking.
"Oh, I think it prudent to show you," she replied. "It is only fair."
"Show me what?"
She was silent and gestured to a door at the end of the endless corridor. She took his hand in her own wonderfully soft fingers and pulled him along. She smelled richly of roses and honey. Arthur looked out another window to see a group of unicorn foals drinking out of a silver stream. They lifted their heads in wonder and looked at him curiously. Arthur was elated. Surely he could fly away in happiness. He felt his feet leave the ground at once. He was really floating. It was then, he realized disappointedly, that none of this was real.
"Who is it that blesses me this night?" He asked the queen. "Is it you? Did you send me this dream? Can you really do such a thing? Or is it merely a product of my innermost desires?"
The queen turned and looked at him with an eyebrow raised. "Bless you? You silly boy. You've been cursed."
"Cursed?"
They had reached the small door, and the queen opened it gingerly. A ray of sunlight lit her cheeks and made them glow with beauty. She pushed open the door and entered first, then gestured to her guest. They had entered a vast ballroom, but it held nothing, and the paint peeled and chipped on the walls. There was only a mirror on one wall boasting an array of colored stones set into its frame. Somehow, the light seemed to dim and tarnish.
"Admire yourself," the queen said.
Oh, what had the queen done? Was he wearing a fabulous ring or a jeweled crown? Could Arthur possibly be king? This was his dream. Anything could be possible. Arthur walked to the mirror in earnest. Just as quickly, he twisted his face in confusion. He did not see himself in the mirror. It was a stranger who stood before him: a severe, pallid, emaciated stranger with murky, green-black eyes and ears like daggers. He wore no robes of majesty, but rather the same clothes Arthur had been wearing the previous day of traveling.
"Who is that?" He asked.
She laughed. "A shock, is it? I assure you that is your own appearance, Arthur. You will agree that it fits you much better than your old form?"
Arthur looked again at his reflection. He bared his teeth, and the stranger bore them, too, sharp and yellowed. He raised a bony, long-fingered hand. The reflection did the same. "What… what am I?" He knew the answer, but feigning ignorance seemed to be the only way to cope with what he saw.
"You're a changeling, you naughty boy," the queen said. Her voice was high and distant. "You did not follow the rules of our land and squandered your exceptional talents on worthless, evil magic, so I have turned you into something that makes a little more sense. Your dark powers will suit you much better now."
"No, you can't have," Arthur said. His voice was hoarse. By this time, he had forgotten that he was dreaming, and an intense terror had begun to claw at him. "You… you can't do that! You can't do this to me!"
"Why not?"
"You… you can't use dark magic to punish someone who used dark magic! It's a vicious circle! Please, can't you forgive me? Show mercy, I beg you! Change me back! I'm hideous!"
"You have brought it upon yourself, Arthur. Perhaps now you will be able to relate to your little brother better."
"No! Please! My crime wasn't nearly as terrible as a changeling's wiles! I didn't steal children! I didn't curse anyone! P-Peter is well cared for, I promise! You can't do this! Don't—"
"Take away your lordship? Your citizenship? Your reputation? Your legacy? None like you deserve these things, Arthur—"
Arthur awoke with a start. Alfred's clamorous voice was ringing through the camp. He closed his eyes again and gave a shaky sigh. "The queen is merciful," he whispered. "I'm not a changeling. They can't do that to me. I'm not a changeling. I'm not a changeling. It wasn't real. It wasn't real. I'm not a changeling." He examined his hands, and his heart relaxed at the sight of full flesh and a healthy color.
"What's wrong with being a changeling?" Alfred asked. His eternal grin appeared above Arthur's.
"Nothing," Arthur retorted.
"Why don't you want to be one, then? Ya know, except for the ugliness and the sickness and the whole child-stealing thing, I do have some pretty impressive powers. I can transform into anyone!"
"I know you can transform into anyone. You were me. And if you had any tact, you wouldn't frighten me when I've only just awoken from a nightmare."
"Another one? And you were a changeling?"
"No," he lied.
"Mm, okay. Come join us, then. I was just showing the others my new battle scar! I didn't see it yesterday, and neither did Mattie, so it just kinda healed itself into the coolest little thing!"
"Where is it?"
Alfred tucked his hair behind his left ear to reveal where a small bit of flesh had been ripped out of it to leave a clean chip. The changeling beamed and gingerly stroked his fingertips over the indent. "Isn't it great? My first one. I remember getting it, too. The dog-man grabbed my ear with his teeth when I was in his shape. It stayed with me into my true form as an injury. I could probably change so I didn't have it, but nah."
"You don't want me to fix that for you, Alfred? I could attempt to regrow the cartilage—"
"No way! It's already healed. I earned it. If you're jealous, I'm sure you'll get one for yourself one day. I'm mighty proud of it. I fought well and hard. A little honor for an infamous creature like myself."
"Good for you, Alfred," Arthur droned. He got up and once again saw that he was the last one to rise.
"I made tea this morning, Arthur," Yao said. "I would have asked you to heat the water for me, but you looked like you were having a good dream again."
"Ah, yes. You were deep in pleasurable fantasy?" Francis teased.
"Pleasurable? I think not," Ivan said.
"Come off it, Ivan," Arthur retorted. "I was having a dream, but I wish not to talk of it."
"He dreamed he was a changeling!" Alfred blurted.
"Oh, really?" Said Francis. "How fascinating. Tell me, did you have the knack to turn yourself into something alluring?"
"You come off it, too, Grease-beard."
"Grease-beard? Oh, but Arthur, I will be taking us to my home soon. I assure you I will fix myself right up again. I shall be just as gorgeous as I was in Lafée."
"Your home?" Alfred asked with rising enthusiasm.
"Oh, yes. I have a lovely house just outside the city. My squire will be waiting for us there. Perhaps my wife will be, too, if she has come back from Darkland."
"Does it have fluffy beds!?"
"Is it the same house you told me about all those years ago? The stately white one with the gardens?" Matthew asked, intrigued.
"The very same one, and I have several guest rooms with plush, feather beds and fluffed pillows. You should be able to indulge in your own pleasurable fantasies while you stay with me. I myself sometimes feel in the comfort of sleep that I am floating above miles and miles of luscious vineyard while the grapes turn into wine."
"Sans salacity? Do tell," Arthur said, taking a sip of his tea.
"Well, you're bitter this morning, aren't you?" Francis replied.
"Certainly not. I was making a note of something interesting."
"In your words, Arthur, 'come off it,'" the human mused.
"Don't fight now," said Yao. "Now, Alfred's already gone to check on the camp, and apparently they've left."
"I'd say they left yesterday," said Alfred. "Our best guess is to meet them in the next town over if they're still there, or in the capital. However, seeing as they're onto us, that's gonna be a bit tricky. Not tricky for me, but you guys'll have to be smart about it."
"I'm not sure I could show my face after what I did to Ludwig. I do want to apologize to him, but I don't want to scare him, see? People around here seem to be a little bit surprised at the sight of me," Matthew said softly.
"Of course they are! You're magnificent!" Alfred laughed.
"Well, that's kinna not really what I mean—"
"I say the best place to meet to discuss further interaction with our quarry is at my house," Francis said. "It shouldn't take too long to get there. A day at best. We could be there by nightfall if we are swift on our feet."
"I'm riding on Mattie's back," Alfred said.
"Oh, could I ride on your back as well?" Yao asked. "You are so high up off the ground. I think it would be like flying."
"Not really like flying," Alfred said, "more like riding a really bulky floating horse. Oh, plus antlers, and he's half human."
"I don't really want to have too many people on my back, Alfred. Maybe just one at a time. And I don't know how fast I'll be compared to other people. I don't want to leave you all behind because of my stride."
But Alfred was speaking over his brother. "See, I know how flying feels. I've been an eagle a few times. Flying's the super smooth ride. Turbulence is the jostling part. When you ride on the back of something, the jostling is constant."
"You've been an eagle," Arthur said.
"Yeah! You looked at my drawings, right? I'm trying to memorize the shape so I don't need a reference. Eagles are top-o-the-line free birds. They take a bit of getting used to, though. Any bird, really. Flying's not as easy as you think."
"That is so amazing," Yao remarked.
"Yes, it is truly frightening what you can do," Arthur scoffed. He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw Francis flash a quick smile of agreement.
"I am not afraid of him," said Ivan. He smiled, and the temperature dropped ten degrees.
Francis tried to abate tensions. "There is the matter of the town up ahead. Should we skip it, then? Just go to my house?"
"I need food," Alfred complained. "We all need food."
"We shall need to see where Ludwig and Feliciano are in town. Perhaps they have already left," said Francis.
"I agree with Alfred," said Yao. "Food is very important. It was you who said we should have a good meal in town this morning, Francis."
"All right! Let's do it, then!" Alfred exclaimed. "'Course, I'm gonna need some new clothes, too." He jumped up and looked at his brother impatiently. Slowly, Matthew rose to his hooves and once again towered over everyone else in the camp.
"I—I really don't know if it's best for me to go into town with you," he whispered.
"What're you talking about? Ivan's a demon, and he came with us into town last time."
"Well, Ivan at least… has two legs." Up in the sky, Matthew was turning a bright shade of pink.
"Not used to gawkers, are you? Maybe if you could disguise yourself like me… wouldn't that be funny? You as a changeling? Hey, lower yourself so I can get on."
Matthew lowered his voice so only his brother could hear. "I didn't think they would all look at me like I'm a mythical creature. I thought since the traders come from Amotoile, people would just know that Homoalces exist. I didn't think I was worlds away. Everything just seems so small here."
Alfred shrugged. "Some people look at me like I'm about to eat their children — which I won't." He emphasized the last part so Arthur could hear, and then added with a smirk, "unless I'm particularly hungry."
"You'd better not talk like that once we're in public," Arthur snapped.
"What? Children are super tender and tasty! Especially fairy children. The ears have a little extra crunch to them, and they're naturally salty."
"You don't really, do you?" Matthew whispered. Alfred rolled his eyes and mouthed "no."
"I will have to agree with Arthur," said Francis. "You will need to watch your language, especially in our capital. It is the most protected city in the whole country. My fellow knights will be watching. I expect that you can take it with a grain of salt you would usually not be welcome."
"Shuckers," Alfred mused.
"Will anyone know if you let him in?" Yao asked.
"We don't have magic barriers, but it is all a matter of seeing the signs."
"I don't show the—"
"You can't hide some things, and you must accept it," Arthur butted in. "Why do you think Ludwig caught you trying to steal the wand? Your hand was burning, and you probably smelled strange. Your kind has a smell, you know."
"Well, I didn't see the scissors."
"Precisely, and you could accidentally touch some anywhere. We all know what happens when you see someone holding them."
"Ah," Francis said suddenly. "We may be checked at the border of the city. Scissors on skin. I will attempt to reason since I am a knight, but perhaps —"
"No way! I'm going into the city!"
"They should let me in at least. My sisters are in the capital," said Ivan. "I have been there before."
"They should let you in just fine, Ivan," Francis said.
"Could they tell if Alfred turned into a bird or something?" Arthur inquired. "Gods, this is terrible what I'm saying right now. The Council would lock me up in an iron cage."
"I don't even want to think about it yet," Francis said. "However, I will try everything in my power, Alfred. I care enough for that. You are a good young man. I think you've proved that by now." He gave a weak smile.
"Hey, thanks, Francy! All right, off to town and off to your house. I can't wait to try these fluffy beds for myself."
One question lingered in Arthur's mind as they set off for town. How in the world was Alfred still so amazingly optimistic? He'd been the one to suffer the light frequency of Feliciano and live through an apparently brutal fight with the dog-man. Yet here he was sitting on the back of his Homoalces brother beaming at the blue sky of a fresh, new morning. What was it that kept him so amused at every sight and smell? Was it simply the nature of his kind, or could it have been something else? A sense of adventure perhaps? Or the rush of recklessness brought about by the joy of risk? In a way, perhaps, Alfred was freer than Arthur, and that was a gloomy thought.
Freedom.
That was it, he realized. Alfred may have been despised, but he was free, and freedom was the secret of his confidence. Arthur had never been free in his life, and his confidence had been draining away from him ever since the day of his conviction. His very pride was wilting just as fast as it burgeoned, leaving him feeling hollow and vulnerable behind his conceited countenance. It might have explained a rationale for stealing Ivan's flask and dancing with ignorance.
I may not be a changeling, and I would never want to be one, of course, he reasoned further, but I am quite smart and talented in dark magic myself, and I must be somewhat free, at least now that I'm in Amotoile on my own. All I need is confidence.
I'm the dashing Arthur Kirkland.
Then, Arthur smirked, and his heart lit with a sense of newfound, fiery pride. Maybe I shouldn't be afraid of the Council after all. They're the ones who should be afraid of me. They can't even touch me. They picked me for this endeavor because I'm so good at magic and understand the darker side of it. My dream was nothing but a silly reminder of a trivial stress. I'm Lord Kirkland, user of both magics. I'm so hot, I could kiss myself.
I'm not a changeling, though. Let's get that straight right now.