A/N: So this is it. The part I've been waiting for. I think my entire fanfic boils down to these next parts. I know it's a bit choppy, filled with scenes and not a lot of story, but this was mostly written as a way to get out all I wanted between Tobias and Elfangor. It makes me feel really good, and I hope it will do the same for you. Happy reading!
The war was finally over. I now spent most of my time with Rachel and my mom. I'd started going to school again, taking classes online, so I'd be able to go to university. The Animorphs no longer hung out as a group, but we would always be close. The world still tried to get us to expose ourselves, but we were happy with anonymity. We – well the others more than me – still occasionally got recognized and had to deal with the attention, but for the most part, we led normal lives. It helped that we hadn't ever been famous. Instead of constantly being reminded of that time, we got to move on with our lives. Nothing would ever be as it was, yet it seemed that finally everything would be ok.
Except for one thing. I started missing my dad again. I'd never really stopped thinking about him, yet while the war was going on, I felt more of a connection to him. Now that was gone too. And more than that, Ax had gone home. My last connection to my Andalite father was gone.
I thought about him a lot. My mother doesn't remember him, which saddens me. I grew up with them; I knew how much they loved each other. All I want now though, is to be able to live my life in peace, like my father wanted. I had thought that although there were some things I had lost, I couldn't be happier in my life. But that all changed.
I was walking home from Rachel's, taking a shortcut through the woods, when I heard the rustling of leaves. I turned, but there was no one there. I heard the sound again and followed it.
"Hello?" I asked, out loud. If there was someone there, I wanted to see them. The figure stepped into view, and I started. It wasn't strange to see an Andalite here, just unusual. There were many an Andalite at one time on this planet, but never in this area and never alone. I came closer to see if I recognized him and gasped, stopping in my tracks. He noticed me as well and stiffened. I was frozen in place, unable to move. The face, it was one from my dreams. It couldn't be here. I'd only seen it the once, when I'd watched him die, but I'd never forget the face of my father. He can't be here, my head told me. This is a trick. Oh please let it be him, my heart cried. I stepped forward slowly.
Dad? I asked, tentatively.
Tobias. I heard softly in my mind. It was him. This was real. It could've been a trap, he wasn't supposed to be alive, but I didn't care. All I knew was that my father was, once again, before me. Without thinking, I reacted.
"Dad!" I cried, and ran to him, tears stinging my eyes. I almost hit a tree, not being able to see very well through my tears, but I didn't care. I barreled into him, almost knocking him off his feet, clutching him tight. "Dad!" I sobbed into his chest.
Tobias. He said again, wrapping his arms around me. They were weak, but he squeezed as hard as he could. I could feel him crying silently in my mind. Yes, this was him; I had no doubts at all. I squeezed him a little harder. Finally, I let go a little and looked into his face. He put his hands on my shoulders to look at me.
You're older. He said. I nodded, unable to speak. How long Tobias? He asked.
"What do you mean?" I looked into his eyes, full of compassion.
How long was the war? How long were you fighting for?
I looked at the ground. "I can't remember. It was so long. I think about four years though. At least."
My father's eyes became sad. Oh, Tobias. I'm sorry to have brought this burden on you.
"It's alright, Father. I was proud to fight. I fought in your name, it wasn't your fault."
I put my arms around him again. After a long pause, my father said, Tobias?
I looked up. I waited for him to finish. It took a while, but then he said slowly, You're not from here, are you?
I shook my head. "But you remember me, don't you? Before you died."
He nodded his head and I breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, I remember you. The child I raised. The one who knew me and thought me a good father.
"You were only ever a good father. I missed you, Dad." I said.
I missed you too, Tobias. I've always wished we'd had more time. And now, miraculously, it seems we do.
I stepped back a little to survey my father in full. "But Dad, how did you survive?"
He shook his head. I don't know, son. But it was a blessing that I did, let's just leave it at that. No need to dwell on the past. I knew what he meant. All that mattered was that he was alive. After I was saved from the Visser, I hid in a cave, not far from here. I ran daily, for nourishment, but otherwise stayed out of sight. I knew I could not be discovered until after the war was over. I had no idea how much time had passed, I just waited for it to be over. When I knew it was, I was able to leave the cave. I have only been out a few weeks. I did not want to just turn up in the city, which is why I'm so glad you found me.
He smiled that Andalite smile, and I returned one of my own. I was so happy in this moment; it seemed there was nothing that could hurt me now. However, my father's next words cut me like a knife.
Tobias? He asked. What of your mother?
I looked at the ground. I hadn't expected this, but now, realized I should have. "She's fine." I replied. "I saved her from the Yeerks."
But what happened to her? He asks. Something must have happened for her not to have raised you. I know she wouldn't just abandon you.
I shuffled my feet a little as I tell him what she told me. "She was in an accident. She lost most of her memory and had to be taught everything again. She became blind and forgot all about me. Once I rescued her, we gave her the morphing ability so she could see again. This might have triggered something, because she started to remember me again. I moved in with her once I was fully human." I stopped.
And what about me? Does she miss me? Did you tell her I was dead? The heartbreak in his voice killed me. I knew how hard it must have been for him to leave her; I couldn't bear to tell him the truth now that he could get her back. But I had to; he deserved to hear it.
"She doesn't remember you, Dad." I told him quietly. "The Ellimist took all memory of you away. She has no idea who my father is." The tears slipped down my cheeks as I looked my father in the eye.
He stumbled a bit and I could see the anguish on his face. "I'm so sorry, Father."
It's alright, Tobias. It's not your fault. It's mine, for leaving her.
"That's not fair!" I cried. "You didn't have a choice!"
Nevertheless, I shall take the blame He said, ever the virtuous warrior. I love my father, but I wished he wasn't so hard on himself. He's so much greater than he gave himself credit for. I would like to see her, Tobias.
I looked at him, thinking. I didn't know how to respond to that. I should be happy, having both my parents alive and well. But I was a bit wary. I wasn't worried about my father's intentions, only what they might do to my mother. She doesn't remember him, and he'd want to tell her the truth. I didn't want her to be confused. However, one thing I know is, when my father's mind is set on something, there is no changing it. I nodded.
"I'll bring you to her." I told him. He thanked me, and we followed the path out of the woods together, side by side. I couldn't say I was completely disappointed. All I'd wanted for a long time was for my parents to be together again.
It didn't take long to get home; I'd already walked halfway there when I'd stopped in the woods. I used my key and opened the door, stepping inside. Elfangor waited politely on the porch.
"Mom?" I called. "I'm home!" I heard noises in the kitchen; Mom's probably getting dinner ready.
"I'm in here, sweetheart." I turned to see my father in the open doorway, looking strangely uncomfortable. I gave him a reassuring smile and gestured with my hand for him to come in. He did so, slowly, his leg shaking slightly as he stepped into the house. He's scared, I realized. The idea was laughable to me. My father was the bravest man I have ever known. I had no idea how hard this would be for him.
"Tobias?" My mom calls. I heard the sounds in the kitchen stop.
"I'm here, Mom. I brought a visitor." I didn't say who yet, but my heart pounded in anticipation of the moment.
"Oh, how nice. Hold on, I'm coming." I waited with my father, both of us tense, as my mother prepared herself to come meet this "stranger." The moment she came into view, I feel my father's surprise beside me.
She's so beautiful. I heard in my mind. I looked away from my mom, slightly, in embarrassment. My mom's reaction to Elfangor was the polar opposite. She started in surprise, yet recovered easily enough, putting a smile on her face.
"Forgive me; I just didn't expect any visitors today, let alone any Andalites." She held out a hand. "I'm Loren. Human, of Earth." She said, a smile on her lips.
Elfangor, having gotten over his initial shock, took her hand in a firm grip.
I am Elfangor-Sirinial-Shamtul. He said. Andalite. His eyes twinkled with a smile. But through his graciousness, I could feel a pain cut straight through him. No matter how much you prepare yourself, you're never prepared. My father hadn't been prepared, that much was clear. It hurt that she didn't recognize him, I saw that, and it broke my heart that I couldn't do anything.
My mother started at the name, however. "Elfangor? You mean the Andalite who..."
Dad nodded. I was the one who gave the Animorphs the morphing power.
On the way home, Elfangor had asked me how much Loren knew of him. I told him she knew of the construction site, but nothing of his past. Kind of like the rest of the Animorphs.
"How are you alive?" My mom covered her mouth. "Oh, forgive me. That was rude."
No apology necessary. Fortunately, I was able to escape that untimely end and was in hiding until now.
"And now that it's safe...?"
My dad and I had discussed this on the way here. I would need some excuse to spend time with him without Mom being suspicious.
Since Andalites have been coming to Earth to learn of human customs, there are those who have similarly wanted to learn more of Andalite culture and society. In my solitude the past few weeks, I have kept in touch with my people via a transponder I had made. I have found that I feel I do not belong in Andalite society anymore. After all that has happened to me as a result of and during the war, I feel I do not want to return to that life. I have no place there anymore. I have decided to stay on Earth instead. I knew part of this was true. My dad did feel that he belonged more with humans than his own people, and – besides for Mom and I – was the reason he'd decided to stay. After learning of this course where Andalites teach humans of our culture, I found that Tobias had sent in an application. Loren looked at me strangely.
"You didn't tell me you signed up for anything."
I fidgeted a little. "Well, it was a last minute decision. I also didn't expect to be accepted; I'd honestly forgotten about it."
Elfangor smiled at me with his eyes. I saw your son's application and simply had to become his teacher. He continued. I had met him only once before, but I had seen such greatness in him, and after the war, I felt he only deserved for me to teach him about myself, to repay him for what he'd done. I looked down, understanding what he was trying to tell me. When he'd seen me at the construction site, he'd seen all that could have been, the "greatness" of him having raised me. And now, he would teach me what it would be like to live with him again. He would teach me the ways of being his son.
Thank you, Father. I whispered in thought-speak to him. He couldn't nod, but I felt his acknowledgement.
I met Tobias again, today, telling him I would be his teacher. I simply dropped by to see his mother, whom I've heard so much about. He stepped back a little and shook his head. I must say, he did not do you justice. You're so much more beautiful than he described. I almost shook my head at my father for his blatancy, but I couldn't blame him.
My mother blushed. "Thank you. That is very kind of you." She smiled. A ding came from the kitchen, and surprise lit up her face. "Oh!" She exclaimed. "I apologize, but dinner is almost ready, I have to take the food out of the oven." She turned, but then stopped and turned back. "Would you like to join us for dinner?"
Elfangor shook his head. Thank you for the offer, but I have duties to attend to tonight. Perhaps another time.
Alright, then. Just know you're always welcome. My mother went into the kitchen to deal with the food.
"I'll walk Elfangor out!" I called. I walked with my father to the door. Once we were outside, I gave him the biggest hug he can handle.
That didn't go as badly as I thought it would. My father said. He tried to sound lighthearted, but I heard the pain in his voice.
"Are you ok, Dad?" I asked.
He put a hand on my shoulder. Yes, Tobias. I'm fine.
All I wanted was for him to stay, but I knew he couldn't. I wouldn't be able to see him again until tomorrow. Do you have a place to stay? I asked him.
Yes. I will be fine tonight, Tobias. Don't worry about me. I'll see you tomorrow.
He drew me close one last time before saying goodbye. I watched him walk down the street, all alone and I wanted to cry. However, I had to go inside, put a smile on my face for my mother and eat dinner.