Sorry for the delay, everyone! I spent a week in Honduras on a Mission Trip, which was heartbreaking, eye opening, and phenomenal.

As always, I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Merlin

I watch intently with bated breath as Arthur warily walks back to his horse. My eyes lock onto the horn as he pulls it from his saddlebag, and I have to fight the urge to rush forward and snatch it from him. I have to appear calm and in control.

Arthur hesitates for a moment, and before I can stop myself I take a hurried step forward. "Now!" Everyone flinches instinctively at my shout. Morgana puts a firm hand on my arm, as if silently commanding me to pull myself back. I reluctantly regain my composure, eyes never leaving Arthur's wary movements.

Seemingly making up his mind, Arthur cautiously walks back to me with the horn in his grasp. My palms grow sweaty and my heart thuds in my chest, eyes now fixed on the object that will bring my mother back to me.

Finally Arthur stands before me once again, and I've grabbed the horn from him before he can hold it out to me.

I'm torn from my concentration as Arthur clears his throat. "You have the horn, now. You swore that you will spare Gwen."

I glare at him, eyes narrowing. "I have not forgotten, and I do not betray promises."

He nods at this, relief evident on his face. I look away from him to examine the horn in my hands. It's exactly the same as the last time I saw it. The smooth, pearly surface of the horn feels heavy and cold.

I step away from Arthur and Morgana, wanting space. I feel everyone's eyes piercing into my back, but pay it no mind. This is the moment I've been thinking about for days, now. The moment I get to see Mother again.

With shaking hands, I raise the horn to my lips...and blow.

A misty, blindingly white wall appears before me, and by the gasps from behind me, I am sure the others see it as well. I take a deep breath before stepping into it and entering the Spirit World, trying aimlessly to prepare myself.

The light engulfs me and my breath is forced from my lungs, my stomach constricting and my head feels light.

I have to squint to see, and blink rapidly as the light fades to reveal eerie blue mist all around. Then I see her, walking slowly out of white light of her own, taking my regained breath away again.

"Mother," I whisper, eyes growing wide and a real, genuine smile forming on my lips.

She looks back at me, and a pang of guilt slams into me at her sorrowful expression. "Merlin," she replies softly. Tears are already streaming down my face, a childish feeling of 'I want my mommy' overwhelming me.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..." I repeat again and again, looking at her beseechingly. "I should have saved you; I should have protected you -"

"No, Merlin," Mother insists, cutting me off. "It is my responsibility as your mother to protect you. I do not regret it - I would die for you any day."

"No!" I snap, losing my grip on my emotions. "No, I should have never gotten you into any of this, it was because of me; I should have never come back to Ealdor!"

"That was beyond your control. Do not blame yourself for it," Mother presses, a ghostly tear rolling down her own cheek.

Hate fills me at her words. "No," I angrily wipe the moisture from my face. "It was Arthur - it was always him! He condemned me to death and is responsible for yours!"

"You're wrong, Merlin," My heart sinks at her words. I can't be wrong. I'm not. "Arthur tried to reason with you but you would not listen! Everything he told you was true - he did not send those men to Ealdor! He was going to let you go, let you free. He had no part in my death!"

My lip quivers and a knot forms in my throat, eyes burning with tears of denial. "No, no, no, it was him! It was his fault, all his fault -"

"You know I would not lie to you, Merlin!" Mother insists, voice rising in urgency. "My heart has broken at what you have been doing - joining Morgana, killing innocent people - it's not right, Merlin, it's not who you are!"

"I have to -"

"You have turned to darkness, you have let yourself be corrupted and your judgement has become clouded! You are so fueled by a false sense of revenge that you have lost who you are and the love you once had!"

I don't fight the tears anymore, letting myself break down at the words. My knees shake, and I slide to the ground, overcome with grief, confusion, and guilt. It cannot be true - it just can't - but I know Mother would not tell me these things if they weren't.

"I - I'm going to bring you back. I -" I stammer, head bowed and eyes squeezed shut, trying to block out Mother's words.

"No!" She suddenly cuts in, taking me by surprise. I look up at her pleadingly.

"Please, I need you back! I can't bear going on without you!"

"If you bring me back to be with you my spirit will never be at rest. I belong here, in the Spirit World. Merlin, we both knew my time had to come eventually -"

"But not yet! Not now - I can't...I'm not ready to lose you -"

"Merlin, we haven't much time," Mother insists, coming forward before me. "You must know that I do not regret my sacrifice for you, and that you have been led astray by your grief. The things you think are true are not and you cannot trust that darkness inside of you to bring anything but more darkness and pain! If you kill Arthur you will destroy everything you've been working towards! Albion will never come if you do this -"

"Morgana and I will bring magic back to power!" I persist, trying to hold onto that truth I've come to know.

"Listen to me, Merlin," Mother replies, voice darkening. "Morgana will do nothing but corrupt you further. You think you love her only because you have lost sight of what real love is!" Her eyes flicker up to the veil behind me, then back to my face. "You must go now, Merlin, before you are trapped here. Listen to what I have told you!"

I meet her gaze beseechingly. "Come with me," I beg, forcing myself to my feet.

"I love you, Merlin, I love you so much." She says softly.

"I love you, too, Mother," I whisper back. I have to force my eyes from her in order to turn back to the veil, mind buzzing more than when I came in. I cannot leave her here. I need her with me, should never have left her to begin with.

"Don't look back, son," Her words cut into me, pausing my movements as I was just about to bring her with me.

Arthur

We all stand silently, eyes fixed on the place where Merlin disappeared a few minutes ago. I know he has to come back soon, or else be caught in the Spirit World forever. I don't know which I'd prefer...

Suddenly he appears, falling out of the white light to land on his hands and knees.

I did not know what to expect, really, but it was not to see him trembling and sobbing on the ground. Everyone is silent, simply staring at him, afraid to do or say anything.

Morgana moves first, going to kneel beside Merlin's shaking form. "Merlin?" She asks, genuine concern in her voice. I listen in intently, not wanting to miss a word. "What happened? Where is your mother now?"

It's as if the mention of his mother sets Merlin off, because he suddenly shoves Morgana away and shakes his head adamantly. "Get off of me!" His voice is quiet, but in the eerie silence it's clearly heard.

Morgana's eyes grow wide. "What happened?" She demands more forcefully, reaching out to grab Merlin's arm. He pulls away, staggering to his feet to distance himself. The little patience Morgana seemed to be holding onto breaks, a hint of franticness slipping into her tone. "Merlin! What did your mother say?"

Merlin turns slowly to look at me, making my heart beat anxiously. His eyes are wide, questioning. It looks like he might cry. I feel my own face reflecting the emotions on his own - what did his mother say to him? Did she succeed where I failed and change his mind?

"You were telling the truth?" He asks, voice dull and eyes glistening.

"Yes," I reply softly, all in a rush, mind racing in excitement. "Yes, every word!"

Merlin nods slowly, face crumpling. It's evident that he wished for a different answer, that immense guilt has been placed on his shoulders. I know the feeling.

"No!" Morgana shouts, grabbing Merlin's shoulders and shaking him. "He's only lying so he can protect himself! He's a coward and a murderer! It's because of him that your mother is dead!" She gets more desperate by the second, hysteria entering her eyes. "You and I are going to rule over Camelot together, remember? You will be king and I queen and we will reunite magic to the land! We will strike down all of our enemies and those who threaten magic - all will be right again!" Merlin doesn't say anything, just clenches his eyes closed and shakes his head.

"Don't listen to her, Merlin!" I interrupt, trying to break the wall he's put up once and for all. "Your mother told you the truth, didn't she? Hunith wouldn't lie to you, Merlin, you know that!"

Morgana's chest rises rapidly, and her eyes shift from my face to Merlin's before gripping his chin and kissing him, pulling him close. Merlin falters at this, eyes fluttering closed as he returns the kiss, hands circling Morgana's too-small waist. It's as if he just inhaled a drug by the way he desperately takes control, slipping into his dominant side once again. A smile forms on Morgana's lips. I can practically hear her thought of 'I've won'.

"Merlin!" I shout desperately. "Your mother would want better for you! All that can come out of this darkness is more darkness - don't you see?"

Something I said seems to have triggered in Merlin's mind, for he instantly pulls away from Morgana to stare off to something unseen before him, a battle waging in his eyes. I'm just about to say something more when Merlin slowly makes his way to the middle of the village road, turning in a circle and taking in the crushed buildings and debris stacked in a high pile.

Merlin

My mind is whirring, my body numb, my heart seemingly paused for the moment. As I look around me, I see the peaceful village I grew up in...Broken. To my left lie the snapped wooden boards of my old friend Hilaria's home. My heart aches at the thought of her; we were close as children, closer than just friends. She was the first girl I ever kissed, and I was sure I'd marry her one day - would have if I had moved faster to protect her from an attack on our village.

I whip around, and am faced with the sight of a crushed barn. Will and I helped an elderly couple build it many years ago. On the dirt road grain is strewn along with scraps from broken gathering sacks. The usual sound of clucking chickens is absent, and I know they must have been killed in my outrage over Mother's death.

So much destruction, all because of me. I overturned the village I helped build long ago.

My feet feel the need to go somewhere, to escape, but Morgana is behind me and Arthur and his knights before me. I look around wildly, feet catching on themselves, head pounding.

What I see before me stills everything. I stare with unsuppressed horror at the small clearing where we bury our dead.

There are four freshly dug graves.

An inhuman sound rises in my throat, and without really registering it I have collapsed, shaking like a leaf. Tears are pouring down my face, and suddenly they are mixed with large drops of rain streaming down from the sky. My breath is caught somewhere inside of me, barely coming out in ragged gasps and sobs.

This is all my fault. I killed my old neighbors, hurt my friends, and pushed away the people who could have helped. I'm a monster.

I hear Arthur's feet approach me, not even stopping to consider how I know it is him without looking. I sense his concern from above me, my magic whirling confusedly inside my veins.

Monster.

"Kill me," I say desperately, looking up to meet Arthur's wide eyes.

Andddd leave you guys on a cliff-hanger ;)

Reviews are candy for the soul. (Also I'm running out of interesting ways to ask for reviews.)