A/N: I'm a terrible person. I'm a terrible terrible person, for saying my chapter would be up early and then not putting it up...Writer's block sucks man.

I have no room for excuses and f.y.i. This chapter sucks and is boring.

I forced myself to post something before I leave for vacation tomorrow.

I'm sorry. :'( I don't deserve my 100+ reviews. (XD! WOO I hit 100) I still love you all though.

Rejection hurts.

Especially when people are around to see it, people that are equally mad and rejecting to you as the first person.

People like Sasuke watching Shikamaru reject me.

Then there are people like Choji and Naruto who feel sorry for you, which makes you feel much worse because having people feeling sorry for you means they wish they weren't you.

Which means your life isn't worth them wanting, which means it probably isn't anything close to what you want your life to be.

You know what makes it all worse?

It's all my fault.

I managed to trudge slowly and quietly, holding my tears in and taking the long way back to my dorm. Even going so far as to take all the stairs to skip the elevator, therefore skipping having a ton of people see pitiful me.

I slid my student ID card into the lock on my door, waited for the little green light to blink on and pushed my door open.

I creeped into the room bracing myself for a moment, and finding no one there.

"Oh thank god." I collapsed face down on my bed, dropping my big, slouchy purse onto the floor.

The last thing I wanted was for Hinata to see me, or worse for Ino and Tenten to be in here with Hinata.

I laid there for two hours, unmoving.

I just thought.

Thought about everything that had happened and how I reacted.

How I needed to put it all back together, regardless of the fact that I wasn't in a good spot to do so.

I went over every single detail from the past few days, every date, every boy, every friend, every stupid thing I did.

All of it.

You know how it all made me feel? Like crap.

I mean sure, in retrospect I thought about my date with Lee and laughed a tiny bit and I might have blushed at the thought of kissing all those amazing guys but that didn't mean my life hadn't had it's share of bad things happening in between the events.

Actually, the good events were the main factors catapulting into those in between events.

I know this sounds stupid, I'm just summing everything up so I can get my head cleared.

Right now, the only way I see it I need to start back over.

From practically square one. I was going to finish this thing, even though it'll be hard and it's already a big mess.

I'm going to use my new found wits and go back to the normal, old, real me but use her to make smarter decisions than the dumb, new, fake me did.

Yeah, that'll work won't it?

I had the rest of my night to sit alone in my room. I showered and combed out my hair and organized everything for tomorrow morning when I woke up so I'd look perfect and be totally organized and ready.

I sleep much better when I know I won't wake up fussing over accessories and how my hair will turn out.

I did all my homework. Sure it took like five years, but I caught up on everything, even calling some classmates to get the assignments.

It was probably 11:20 when Hinata walked in biting her lip and wringing her hands. She stared at the floor probably thinking I was mad at her.

"Hina-chan, I'm sorry." I blurted out as I sat down on the middle of my bed.

"Oh!" She looked up at me clearly surprised. "I-I figured y-you would...N-nevermind! I'm so s-so sorry Sakura-chan! I should never e-e-ever let Ino start that du-m-mb game." Her words poured out in a jumbled rush and she sat down next to me throwing her arms around my neck.

"Hina, it's alright, really. I'm not even mad anymore. It's useless and it's my fault anyway." She let her arms fall away from me and blinked back a few tears.

"What?"

"Sure I didn't make up the game, but I still ruined it by the way I played. I messed up. I'm not mad." I said firmly, because I knew if I showed any sign of wavering Hinata would continue to blame herself. She's so sweet. It's just overboard sometimes.

"B-but I could have-"

"Stop." I held up my hand. "Really, just forget about it."

Hinata followed me out of our dorm room and down the hallway. She was still hesitant at first and apologized to me as we were getting ready for school but I quickly shushed her and she resumed her happy personality as she walked along beside me now.

"Sakura-chan, have you spoken to Shikamaru-kun yet?" Hinata asked as we rounded the corner down the main hallway.

"I tried to...he wouldn't speak to me though. I pissed off a lot of people yesterday, I don't blame him especially for being mad." I sighed, trying to not let it get to me too much. I'd try to speak to Shikamaru a little bit again today but I knew now wasn't the time.

Shikamaru needed his space for a while until he got ready to talk to me. That's just how he worked, and if I kept bugging him and pushing him to work at my pace like always we would damage our friendship even more. Or what's left of it that is.

The thought of losing Shika forever made me shudder.

"Are you okay?" Hinata asked me.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." I reassured her as I neared the Advanced Chemistry room.

I sat into my usual seat at the black topped table I shared with Shikamaru, who wasn't in class yet. I was a little relieved and a little curious, because Shikamaru is never late to class (despite his laziness) I'm the one who's always late.

"Sakura, nice of you to join us today." Kurenai-sensei said from her desk giving me that knowing look and I slouched in my seat.

"I've missed your class so much Kurenai-sensei, it's just that I was having trouble getting over a bad cold." She gave me a "hmph" and dropped the subject.

I really did need to get better at lying. Maybe Tenten could coach me? On second though she really isn't that great of a teacher, I'm sure that wouldn't be a good idea after all...

My thoughts were interrupted by my last few classmates to walk in the door, followed by the bell ringing and Kurenai closing the door.

I stared at the door.

Where was Shikamaru?

He's never late...

"Sakura-san?"

"Uh yes Kurenai-sensei?" I asked tearing my eyes away from the door I was so sure Shikamaru would waltz right through, already having a yellow pass slip ready to hand in.

"Where is Nara today?"

"I don't know Kurenai-sensei. I haven't spoken to him." I shrugged.

"Well I certainly hope he hasn't caught that cold of yours." She said crisply turning to her computer to surely mark him absent.

I sat down in Creative Writing and took out my notebook to continue on with my collection of doodles. It wouldn't help if I stared at the door for another whole period, praying Shika would just show up with some extremely good and completely true excuse.

It only stung a little by the time I got to College Math and Asuma-sensei was the third teacher to ask me where Shikamaru was. Of course I should have expected it from him most of all, Shikamaru was his favorite student, and Asuma was Shikamaru's favorite teacher.

I was a little worried their friendship would cause him to take but Asuma's awful smoking habit, but so far I haven't got any hints of it. I wouldn't be surprised if Asuma gave his prodigy cigarettes though, he's not a big respecter of rules...or laws...

I made sure I was one of the first to come into Art though. I quickly sat down and rested my head in my arms on the desk.

I didn't want to see anyone's faces as they came in and took their seats, especially the ones that sat around me. Cornering me more like it.

I forgot I'd be surrounded on all sides. Naruto might be the only one with a shred of loyalty left for me. He may be Sasuke's best friend but he was Hinata's boyfriend.

I flinched when I heard the seats in front of me and to the left of me scoot out at nearly the same time. I had been lost in my own thoughts enough to not notice any of the familiar voices of my friends.

I did immediately recognize Naruto's laugh as he walked in with who I assumed was Hinata-chan. I refused to look up and see though, even though I knew Hinata would be worried the instant she saw me.

I broke my concentration when I heard the seat in front of me and directly to the right squeak and groan as someone sat down, followed by a sigh.

When my head snapped up and saw that spiky ponytail I almost had a moment of relief, except I realized Tenten was turned around in her chair and staring directly at me, her face completely blank and erased of any emotion.

"We need to talk." She said flatly, before turning around and facing the front of the room.

I wanted to get up and duck out of class, pretend I was sick, that I needed to throw up. Because that wouldn't be entirely false. My refusal to run away anymore won out.

I stared at Tenten's two messy brown buns for a few seconds before checking to make sure my face was composed. I turned my head ever so slightly to the right, as if I was looking at Neji, and peeked at Sasuke-kun from the corner of my eye.

He was watching me, with a face as equally blank at Tenten's was.

Somehow I knew he really wasn't someone for 'talking it out' and making up.

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