Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto…but would definitely love to own Gaara or any of the other characters!

A/N: Hello there my fellow readers! I hope you guys like this chapter.

LOVE AND SECRETS

Chapter 21

"So you're going to make this easy for me," Kakashi taunted. "You're just going to stand there?"

"You wish," Akira replied feeling her chakra build inside her. "You can't catch me."

"Wanna bet," Kakashi asked as took a step towards her.

"Sure," Akira said. "You're going to have to find me first! Shadow clone jutsi!"

In a puff of smoke hundreds of Akiras appeared identical to the real Akira even down to the smoke.

"Scatter!" was the last thing Kakashi heard the real Akira say before all hell broke loose.

Hundreds of Akiras went every which way. Bumping into each other and the ones that bumped into him he took out knowing they weren't the real one. After getting rid of about eighty of the clones he looked and saw about a hundred of them getting into a line. What the hell, he thought. Maybe she's not off her game.

"Can you tell," one of them said.

"Which one," said another one.

"Of us is real?" said the one in the middle.

"None of you," Kakashi said building up his ball of lightning chakra.

"You sure about that," asked the same middle Akira.

He looked at her eyes and saw Akira's mischievous twinkle and then she walked back and a clone stood in her place and he lost the real one. She changed up her strategy, he thought as he took another step the Akira clones.

With every step he took towards the line of clones, they took a step towards him. He took a step backwards and they did too. He took a step to the side and they matched his move. That's when he realized what Akira was doing. She was distracting him. It was one of the first things he taught her when they started training. When you think there is no hope in winning, your best strategy is distraction and then come at your opponent from behind. He turned around just in time to see the real Akira running at full speed towards him. She was going to tackle him and he knew it. He backed away and realized his mistake because the moment he took his eyes of the clones they all surged forward at full speed.

Akira ran into Kakashi knocking him down. She smiled as she sat on top him. "All I'm gonna do is wear you out. So take out all my clones, I'll just make more," she whispered sweetly as she looked his shocked face.

He looked around and saw all the Akira clones had formed human wall around him. He could hear Tsunade asking if they were okay. "You won," he said watching her shrug.

She got off him and held out her hand, "I cheated."

"No you didn't," he replied taking her hand. He could hear the Hokage getting closer. "You didn't let her see you win."

"It was never a fair fight K. You would never hurt me. Even in training, you would push me hard but never actually try to hurt me. The Hokage doesn't know this was never fair because I cheated by not telling her the truth. Any other nin you would have taken down without a problem. I need you to treat me as if you don't know me. Give me everything you have. Then it'll be a fair fight," she said smiling.

"Why do you want it to be fair," he asked still holding her hand. He knew everything she had just said was true.

"It's the only way to know if I'm better than you," she answered with a smirk. "Come on K. Give me everything you've got."

She let go of his hand and gave him another smile, "She's getting closer K, Make a decision or I'm just gonna wear you out." She lined up with her shadow clones and smiled. "Take me out."

He felt someone punch him on the shoulder. He turned around to see a clone getting ready to punch him again. He took her out with out a second thought and heard his Akira laugh behind him.

"Just like that Kakashi. Don't think, just react," he heard her voice in the crowd of Akira clones.

Kakashi knew she was right. Everything she had said was right. He couldn't hurt her but if he didn't give it all he had this could go on for hours and that was the last thing he wanted. So he did exactly what Akira wanted him to do. He took a deep breath and reacted.

Every clone that came at him he slashed away with his kunai. Every clone that was close enough to kick or punch, he did just that. He took out shadow clone after shadow clone when he saw finally saw there only three left he felt himself relax. It's almost over, he thought as he threw a kunai at an Akira and watched her go in the puff a smoke and turn into a log. Substitution jutsi, he thought to himself.

He looked at both Akiras and realized neither one was the real one so he turned around to look for the real Akira when the clones rushed him he took them out without a second thought.

"Where are you?" he asked the open space. He could see the Hokage, the Sand representatives, Guy, Kurenai and Asuma but no Akira.

He turned around and watched two Akiras walk out from the side of the forest. He knew she was messing with his head. That was always her best strategy. Even though she was an excellent fighter, she always led with a mind games. They both smiled at him and answered, "Here."

He threw two shurieken at each Akira and watched one Akira disappear in a puff of smoke and the other Akira blocked one and ducked before the other one cut her arm.

"That was close," she said with a smile.

"But she's not me," Kakashi heard Akira say from behind him. But the Akira that ducked had to be the real Akira. Only the real Akira knew his tendency to throw to the right.

"You're lying," he said to the Akira behind him.

"Then test us," the Akira in front of him said.

He cocked his head to the side and threw three finger knives at them without thinking. He watched the as both of them jumped out of the way of the first two knives but the third one took out the Akira behind him. He watched the Akira in front him duck down and the knife went sailing past her. She must have forgotten that his third knife a script attached to it that would turn around and hit its target.

She straightened and smiled at Kakashi and then realized she heard something behind her and turned around to late. She knew she couldn't avoid it so she closed her eyes throwing up her arms knowing her charka skin would protect her.

"What the hell," she heard Kakashi whisper. Akira opened her eyes and sucked in a deep breath, in front of her was a dirt wall protecting her from the boomerang finger knife that had come back for her. For a full five seconds all she heard was Kakashi soft breathing behind her and then the wall came down, absorbed back into the earth like it was never there.

Kakashi looked at her like she had grown a second head. But the first to render any reaction was the Hokage.

"GAARA NO SUBAKO, get your ass out here NOW," the Hokage yelled as she walked towards Kakashi and Akira. Akira watched as her friends walked out of the far left side of the forest, with Gaara leading the way.

Akira walked backwards until she felt Kakashi hard body behind her. She felt his fingers lace themselves with hers and give her hand a squeeze. "What just happened?" He asked to no one in particular.

Akira shrugged and took a deep breath, "It wasn't him."

Gaara walked toward with the Hokage holding tight to Misa's hand. I didn't to that, he thought to himself. He watched Akira walk into Kakashi and stay there. He was trying to hurt you not me, he wanted to tell her but he instead he looked at the Hokage and said, "I can explain."

"Save your explanation," the Hokage replied cutting him off. "What do you think gives you the right to come into an arena you were not invited to, watch a test you weren't invited to and then on top of that interrupt said test to protect an ex girlfriend you longer care for?!"

Well damn, Akira thought, anymore more dirty laundry you want to air out. She felt the air leave her lungs at the word ex-girlfriend. But she gripped Kakashi's hand harder and whispered so only Kakashi could hear her, "It wasn't him."

"Lady Tsunade," Naruto said coming up from behind Gaara.

"Shut it down, I don't want to hear any excuses! Gaara I want you in my office in an hour. Everyone is dismissed," she said in a clipped tone. When she saw no one leave she yelled, "DISMISSED! NOW!"

The Hokage watched all the nins as they scrambled back into the woods and out of sight. She walked over to the Sand Village represents and put her hand up. "Before you even say anything, this test is over because your nin decided to interfere. So now I have to deal with this before we can have any sort of conversation. Please see me in my office tomorrow morning."

The Hokage turned her heal and walked towards Akira and Kakashi, when she reached them she whispered, "Not a word. Follow me now."

Akira and Kakashi followed the Hokage in silence. Akira was still holding tightly to Kakashi hand, she knew she was in trouble she just didn't know how much. She looked at Kakashi and opened her mouth but she quickly closed it when she saw him shake his head.

As soon as they entered the forest the Hokage picked up her speed and Akira found herself practically running to keep up. She had no idea where they were going but one thing she was sure of was they were not going back to the village. After fifteen minutes of running into the middle of the forest the Hokage stopped as abruptly as she started in the middle of a small clearing. She turned around and looked at Akira. Akira opened her mouth to say something the Hokage put her fingers on her lips and shook her head. Akira watched as the Hokage took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She stood like that for a couple minutes before she opened her eyes and looked at Akira and Kakashi.

"When the hell where you going to tell me you can control the earth?!" Tsunade whispered angrily.

"First, what did you just do when you closed your eyes and second, why are you whispering," Akira asked avoiding the question.

"First, I had to make sure we were alone and not followed and second, stop evading the question Akira," the Hokage answered.

"Who says I can control the earth," Akira asked stubbornly. She knew where this was going but she didn't want to talk about it.

"That giant wall of dirt that protected you in the arena," Tsunade shouted.

"I thought you thought Gaara did it. Isn't that why you yelled at him," Akira asked still evading the question.

"She wanted to make sure the Sand representatives thought it was Gaara," Kakashi answered quietly staring at Akira with a curious expression.

"When you said 'It wasn't him', how did you know it wasn't him," he asked Akira.

"Because Gaara controls sand not dirt," Akira sighed as she scrubbed her face with her hands in frustration.

"Which brings me to my original question, when the hell were you going to tell me you could control the earth," the Hokage exclaimed.

Akira took a deep breath and looked at the Hokage. "I can't control the earth," Akira mumbled. She watched the Tsunade open her mouth and Akira put her hand up. "The earth just sort of randomly, whenever it feels like it, protects me. I don't control it…I have no power over it."

"Randomly protects you?! Since when," the Tsunade commanded.

"Since a couple of weeks ago," Akira answered quietly. "Would the two of you stop looking at me like that?!"

"Like what," Kakashi asked.

"Like I'm half human, half bird."

"Half bird?!" Kakashi smiled. "That's the best you can come up with?" He watched her shrug and look at the Hokage.

"You didn't think that was pertinent information your Hokage needed to know," Tsunade asked.

"I can't control it! What the hell is so pertinent about that?!" Akira yelled. "You wanted me to tell you I can't control dirt but it occasionally protects me?!"

As soon as her voice rose to a shout Akira felt Kakashi get closer. She knew he was ready to get in the middle if she lost her temper and the one thing Akira was short on today was her temper.

"I'm fine Kakashi," she said turning around to face him. "I can keep the chakra in check. See," she showed him lifting her hands up.

"Akira, just because you can't control it now, doesn't mean you can't control it later," Tsunade replied. She looked at Akira and was once again surprised at how she grew into the young woman she was now. She could see so much of her mother in her, it was scary and that was the very reason she was scared for the red haired girl standing in front of her.

"I can't control it and was does it matter if I can control the earth or not. It's just some freaking dirt," Akira stated. "Just dirt."

"You couldn't control your chakra wall when you first started and now look at you," Tsunade responded with a quick shake of her head. She walked up to Akira and softly put her hands on her shoulders.

"Who told you to keep your mouth shut," Tsunade asked quietly.

"Why does it matter," Akira answered.

"Who told you to keep quiet?"

"It only happened twice. It was chalked up to the mountain reaching out to protect me," Akira whispered. "It only happened twice," she repeated.

"Who told you to keep quiet," Tsunade asked again.

"Who you do think," Akira asked looking at Tsunade. Akira watched as the realization dawned on her.

"They wouldn't," she replied shocked.

"They would," Akira muttered as she slipped out of Tsunade's grasp. She went to stand next to Kakashi. She felt safe next to him, less judged.

"They wouldn't," Tsunade repeated.

"Of course they would. Their allegiance is to me. I'm a Kimari. Whatever deal they had with you was out of respect for my mom. But don't forget I am their priority. I am the blood they protect. I belong to them, just as they belong to me," Akira stated.

"Someone gave you history lessons," Tsunade noted. "You are still my nin. Where is your allegiance to me?"

"Did this village keep me because no other would take me? Or was I wanted? Or needed? Or was I kept here as insurance that whatever I became would belong to the Leaf?" Akira asked without hesitation.

"Who have you been talking to?" Tsunade asked surprised. Her questions hit closer then she would have liked to admit.

Wouldn't you like to know, Akira thought to herself. "Why don't you answer my questions?"

"What happened, Akira? What happened in the four weeks you were gone," Tsunade asked sadly.

"A lot of things happened. Found out Naruto thinks I'm a slut. Found out I could stick my chakra wall to my skin. Found out Gaara was future Kazakage. Found out how to incorporate Gaara's chakra into mine. Found out how to play memories like a movie. Found out my village kept me because no other would have me and you refused to let the Pandas raise me. But do you know what I really found out? That there is no one on this planet that I can ever fully trust, because every single one of us has secrets." Akira sounded sad and resigned to an unmovable fate.

"You can trust me," Kakashi whispered looking at Akira.

She gave him a small smile remembering their pact when they were together, no secrets ever. All secrets, no matter how painful had to be told to one another. It was that very same pact that made it both hard and easy to tell Kakashi she needed space, that there was someone else she had feelings for.

"Did you know why the sad little girl who killed her dad was kept in the Leaf Village?" Akira asked.

"I found out later," Kakashi answered quietly.

Akira knew what that was code for: I found out after we broke up. She shook her head and looked at Tsunade. She was surprised at what she found in her Hokage's eyes. Sympathy.

"Your mom wanted you raised here. You know that," Tsunade affirmed.

"With my grandmother, but when Grams died you could have let me leave. There was nothing holding me here. Why didn't you let me leave?" Akira demanded.

"You had your brother," Tsunade stated.

"A brother who didn't want me. A village who feared me. One Hokage who thought he owned me. And you…what did you want? What a disappointment I must have been. A nin who couldn't keep her shit together. A nin nobody could control. A nin who looked so much like her mother but acted nothing like her. What. A. Disappointment." Akira sounded agitated, but more than anything like she was done with it all. She was fed up and everything coming out of her mouth screamed she was exhausted with it all.

"Is that what you think?" Tsunade asked at the same time Kakashi opened his mouth to say something. She put her hand up so she could continue. "You think I'm disappointed in you? You think I want to control you? That is far from it. Akira Kioshi-" Tsunade was cut off.

"Kimari," Akira corrected quietly. "It's Akira Kimari, now. And yeah that is what I think. I get why the Hokage has to keep secrets, to protect and defend and all that jazz. But don't you think I have the right to know any secrets involving my family. I'm going to make this easy for you because like I told you before I am done with this entire stinking village and I'm only going to say this once," Akira spoke softly, like she was speaking to a child.

"I was mountain climbing with Kana and I missed a ledge and slipped. I was fully prepared to hit the ground and break a couple of bones. A thirty foot fall was going to hurt. Except when I closed my eyes and braced for impact, it didn't happen. The earth met me in the middle. You would have thought it would be hard and compact impact. But it felt like a hug, warm and soft. And that's when Kana freaked out. Kimari women have no control over the earth. She had no idea what had just happened but she had the same panicked look you had on. The Panda Council didn't know either, so they tested me. They threw everything they had at me to try and activate it again. But it didn't work. My wall, my chakra wall, always protected me," Akira sighed. She walked over to a tree, slid down and sat on the ground. She looked up a Tsunade and Kakashi and continued.

"It was like my brain knew what was coming and my chakra wall was prepared for it. So I made a suggestion to the Council that they weren't too happy about. And they certainly disagreed to letting me even attempt it. But in the end it wasn't their decision, it was mine," Akira finished in a whisper.

"What was it?" Kakashi asked. He could see her warm brown eyes turn colder by the second. She gave him a small smile before she answered.

"Jump off the mountain," Akira replied quietly. She watched Kakashi eyes widen in realization that she was essentially suggesting she should have committed suicide.

"You what?" The Hokage exclaimed. She watched Kakashi and Akira look at each other, like they knew what the other was thinking without saying it. There was something between those two she just couldn't put her finger on it.

Akira shifted her focus from Kakashi to Tsunade. She looked into her Hokage's eyes and saw she thought she was suggesting suicide. "That is how the Panda Council looked at me, like I was crazy. There was no way they let the strongest Kimari they had ever train, try and kill herself, just to see if some mysterious dirt would protect her. So they gave me a resounding no. But when have I ever done what I'm told? When have I ever listened to direct orders?" Akira finished stubbornly.

"So I climbed up the mountain with Kana and Hisa who tried to convince me not to jump. But I figured if they had really wanted to stop me they would have told the Council, right?" Akira asked to no one in particular. She looked at Kakashi and saw the worry in his eyes. She looked at Tsunade and saw the fear in her eyes.

"You guys I'm still here, jeez, you're looking at me like I died and came back to life," Akira said, again scrubbing her face with her hands.

"Because you didn't jump," Kakashi countered.

"Because Kana and Hisa convinced you not to," Tsunade replied.

"No…I jumped," she heard both Kakashi and Tsunade take in a deep breath. "I jumped from the middle of the mountain. I could bring myself to take a five hundred foot drop."

"So you took a two hundred and fifty foot drop," Kakashi exclaimed as he walked over to her and pulling her off the ground and holding her by the shoulders. "You jumped off the middle of a mountain?! What the hell is wrong with you? Do you have a death wish?!"

Akira could hear the fear in Kakashi's voice. She could see his mask of indifference crumbling away and she didn't need him to give them away to Tsunade. She gently took his hands into hers and looked straight into his uncovered eye, "I'm still here safe and sound." She let go off his hands and walked away from him to another tree a couple feet away from them. She had her back to them because what she was going to say next was going to be hard.

"I jumped and for a couple of seconds…just a couple of seconds I thought it wouldn't be the worst thing if I died…at least I'd get to see my mom again," Akira voice was barely above a whisper. She cleared her throat and turned around facing her ex and her Hokage, "But the earth met me halfway down. A column of dirt just shot out of the floor and met me in the middle. But the first time I fell, it felt soft and warm. The second time it was harder, knocking the breath from my lungs. It was like the Earth with was mad I jumped on purpose. But that's crazy…right?" Akira finished quietly.

The Hokage was busy having a panic attack and trying to keep it together at the same time. She watched the red headed shinobi in front of her and knew that her life had just gotten ten thousand times more complicated without her even knowing it. She took a deep breath and turned around to Kakashi, "You are no longer her babysitter. You are her bodyguard until further notice. Do not let her out of your sight. Do not let her talk to any strangers, especially anyone visiting the town. And Kakashi I need you to swear you will lay down your life for her," Tsuande said as calmly as she could. She saw Akira walk over to Kakashi giving her a quizzical look.

"You have my word," Kakashi replied without missing a beat.

"Pause. What the hell is going on," Akira asked looking at the Hokage.

"Akira the Pandas told you keep quiet for your own safety. They were protecting you, except they forgot one thing…you are you. Impulsive. Defensive. Smart. Daring. Fearless. But most of all extremely powerful," Tsunade answered with worry lining her words.

"Why are you acting like my life is in danger," Akira asked.

"Because until I am absolutely positive we can convince the Sand representatives that that dirt wall was Gaara's doing, your life is in danger. If they breathe a word about a Kimari being able to manipulate the Earth, a lot of dangerous people will come looking for you," Tsunade replied seriously.

"What the hell is going on," Akira asked again, confused.

"A prophecy, Akira," Tsunade whispered, "A prophecy involving a Kimari who can manipulate the Earth."

"Akira," Kakashi stated.

"Akira," Tsunade confirmed.

"I don't think you guys understand. I can't manipulate the Earth," Akira retorted. This was crazy, she was not in danger. She was just Akira, Kakashi and Gaara's ex-girlfriend, expert liar. She. Was. Not. In. Danger.

"Yet," Kakashi countered. "You can't control it yet. You couldn't control your chakra wall when you were younger and now look at you. It comes up without you saying it. It's pasted to your skin right now. Imagine what you could do with the Earth."

"It's not the same," Akira whispered knowing it wasn't true.

"You're right, it's not the same, you'd be virtually indestructible," Kakashi replied worried.

"Which is why you are going to protect her until further notice," Tsunade stated walking back the way they came from. She stopped when Akira moved and stood in front of her.

"What's the prophecy, the entire prophecy," Akira asked without skipping a beat.

"Not here Akira," Tsunade answered.

"Why?"

"Because someone's coming," Kakashi answered, taking a protective stance in front of her.

Akira watched the tree line and saw Shizune running towards them breathless. "Lady…Tsunade…I've… been…looking…for…you…everywhere!"

Akira watch Kakashi's stance relax. She hadn't realized she was holding her breath. She watched Tsunade walk towards her and give her a hug. "Go home and I'll send for you later. I have to convince Gaara he did something he didn't actually do," Tsunade whispered in Akira's ear. And with that she walked with Shizune and out of their sight.

I'm screwed, Akira thought to herself as Kakashi took her hand and followed after the Hokage.

"Gaara what the hell where you thinking?" Temari yelled at her brother.

They had gotten home and Temari told everyone they needed a family meeting. So Naruto and Shikamaru took Misa to get something to eat and left her, Gaara and Kankuro to talk. Temari watched Gaara shrug and walked over to the couch and sit down.

"Obviously I wasn't thinking Temari," Gaara stated as a matter of fact. He knew he didn't do what the Hokage accused him of doing but he was damn sure she accused him for a reason and he was pretty sure it had to do with Akira. If he had to lie to protect her then he would. If he had to take the fall for her then he would…because he loved her. He would always love her.

"That much is obvious," Temari shot back aggravated. "Why the hell would you interfere with a fight we weren't even supposed to be at? How did you even do that? It was freaking dirt Gaara!"

"I thought she was going to get hurt Temari!" Gaara yelled. "I might have sent my sand into the dirt when Hatake was getting rid of all the clones. Can you blame me? She freaking fainted yesterday and I didn't think she was ready to fight today. The Hokage made a bad call and apparently so did I," Gaara lied. He had done so much lying the last couple of years it just came naturally now, especially if the lie involved Akira.

"Well maybe you should just leave Akira alone from now on," Kankuro suggested quietly.

"Shut up Kankuro!" Gaara snapped. He was tired of his brother in his business.

"He's right Gaara," Temari said softly. "You can't have both of them. You made your choice. Live with it."

"Really, Temari?"Gaara exhaled angrily. "I made my choice. I haven't made any choices!"

"Akira made it for you," Kankuro said as he walked over to the couch to sit down.

"She hasn't-"

"She has," Temari said cutting Gaara off. "You think she's going to take you back? You think she's going to forget this thing you have with Misa? You think she's going to be able to un-see whatever she saw in your head? She's not. She can't look at you without getting mad. Don't you get it? She made the choice for you."

"If she still loves me she'll forgive me," Gaara whispered.

"That's just it brother," Temari said walking over to Gaara and putting her hand on his shoulder. "Forgiveness isn't the problem. It's the forgetting that she will never be able to do. She does love you, it's why she's so angry, but sometimes loving someone isn't enough. Gaara, this is one of those times."

"It's not," he replied stubbornly.

"It is," Kankuro spoke softly. "You brought Misa here. She knows you love Misa too. Gaara…she's hurt and embarrassed and ashamed she didn't see it coming. But you have got to understand that the person she is most angry at is herself. For letting herself believe you'd two finally be together…problem free."

"How do you know that?" Temari asked.

"When I told her the truth about the Sand Village she told me she couldn't believe she allowed herself to fall in love. She said love was for the foolish and the foolish always ended up getting hurt," Kankuro answered.

"How do I fix this," Gaara asked on Kankuro.

"Why are you asking me," Kankuro sounded surprised.

"Because she seems to have trusted you," Gaara answered.

"Gaara, Akira is a vault full of secrets. Sometimes I wonder how she keeps anything straight. I'm no help," Kankuro replied as their front door rang.

"I'll get it," Temari said walking out of the living room.

"Secrets are what got us into this mess," Gaara muttered. "Maybe if I can get her alone, she'll be more willing to listen."

"And Misa…is it over with Misa?" Kankuro asked.

Gaara sighed because he honest to god had no answer to that question and when Temari entered the living room again, he thanked god he didn't have to answer.

"The Hokage wants to see you in her office now," Temari whispered grimly. "There is an ANBU escort here for you."

Gaara got up and walked out of the room. Let's find out why the Hokage wanted everyone to think I made the wall full of dirt, he thought to himself.

Akira looked at the blue ceiling in her living room. Kakashi had been suspiciously quiet the entire walk back to her house. They sat in the kitchen sipping coffee for two hours in complete silence. She had stared and him, and he stared at her not saying a word. She had gotten tired of the quiet, so she went into the living room and laid down on the rug. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She could feel Kakashi watching her. She could feel him as if he were touching her. She knew he wanted to ask her something but he was holding back. She opened her eyes and propped herself up on her elbows so she could see him.

"Just spit it out," she told him, as she eyed him. His arms were crossed and his muscles were tensed up. He was ready to fight and she knew it. He taking this bodyguard thing seriously, she thought to herself.

"You can't have really meant what you said before," he said quietly as he walked over to her. He watched her sigh and lay back down in the floor. She closed her eyes. That wasn't a good sign. Usually that meant she couldn't look at him and tell him what he had asked. Usually no eye contact meant it she didn't want anyone to know how she was feeling.

"I said a lot of things," she muttered, avoiding the question. She knew exactly what he was talking about and he wasn't going to like the answer. She felt his shadow fall over her.

"Open your eyes Akira," Kakashi asked. He saw her warm brown eyes flash open. He could see everything she was hiding. She was always so gifted at hiding all her emotions but he could always tell how she was feeling by looking into her chocolate eyes.

"You didn't mean it, did you?" He whispered.

"I did," she answered and he dropped to his knees.

"No," he felt the air leaving his lungs. "No, you didn't"

"I did," she whispered as she reached up to touched Kakashi's face. She watched him lean into her touch. He was hurt by her answer and she couldn't understand why. "Would it have been so bad if I had never come back?"

"Akira Kioshi…Kimari," he corrected himself. He still felt like he couldn't catch his breath. "You wanted to die?"

"No…I didn't want to die when I jumped off the mountain. I just didn't care if I did," she corrected. She watched him look at her. He stood up pulling her up with him. He pushed her onto the couch and got on top of her. She looked at him surprised as his fingers brushed her hair out of her face.

"What are you doing Kakashi," she asked, feeling her old desire coming back slowly and then all at once.

"Reminding you what it's like to be alive," he stated as he pulled down his face mask and lowered his face to hers. He stopped centimeters away from her face. He could see her surprise and sadness but he could also see her desire. "Tell me to stop."

"Stop?" she questioned. "Why would I tell you to stop?"

"Because the Akira I know is in there would tell me to stop. She would tell me she can't…that she needs to fix her life before she goes on fucking up someone else's," Kakashi whispered angrily. He watched her flinch when he said fucking up.

"Kakashi," she breathed. "Get off me. Now."

"Akira-"

"I want you Kakashi. I want your hands on me. I want your skin to touch mine. I want you lips in places they shouldn't be. I. Want. You. And I don't know if it's because I want you to make me forget for a couple of hours or if it's because I actually love you. And that is not fair," she said barely above a whisper.

She cleared her throat, "So get off me."

"Tell me you want to live, Akira. Tell me it's worth waking up in the morning," he asked her. He didn't care if it was fair. He was totally up for being used.

"I can't because I don't care either way," she shrugged and his hand slipped under her shirt. She closed her eyes and leaned into his hand a little. "I went to the pandas to forget for a couple of weeks and I realized half way through I just didn't care anymore."

"Because of Gaara," he said sordidly.

"No, because of me," she stated quietly. She was still leaning into his touch. She pushed him up and wrapped her arms around his waist. She buried her face in the crook of his neck breathing him in, breathing in everything familiar. She wanted to get lost, to forget everything about today, everything about the last couple of weeks. She could hear his even breathing. She could always count on that even breathing; no matter how mad he was he always kept his cool. She could feel him rubbing small circles into her back.

"I just woke up one morning and stop caring about living," she said into the crook of his neck.

"Akira," Kakashi said putting his hand under her chin and bringing her face out so he could see her. "You've got so much to live for. How could you give up on all of it?"

She gave him a sad smile. "Did you know I miss my mom every single day," she watched him nod. "Every morning for five full seconds I think I'll see her walk through my door. I miss seeing her. I miss hearing her voice. And when I was with the pandas, they made me go through my memories, so I could learn how to pause and look for details. Re-living those memories made me miss her even more than ever. One day I just woke up after having a particularly rough night, dreaming of my mom and I realized the world won't suck half as much if I was with her," she finished quietly looking into Kakashi's eyes. She could see him analyzing her.

"But you can't because she's dead," he stated as he stared into her eyes, trying to determine if she was still slightly suicidal.

"Yeah, I get that but it wasn't until I jumped of the middle of the mountain that I realized that I kind of wanted to hit the ground. But the stupid earth didn't let that happen," she muttered laying her head on his chest.

"Akira-"

"You're going to ask me if I still don't care," she said cutting Kakashi off. "Honestly? I don't know. What I do know is this: one, I'm angry at Gaara for keeping his new girlfriend a secret. Two, I'm mad at my friends for keeping the secret for Gaara. Three, I'm internally freaking out because both the Hokage and the Panda Council freaked out about the earth saving me. And four, I want you to kiss me. I want you to kiss me like it's the last kiss you'll ever give me." She looked up at him and could see how much the last one had surprised him.

"I can do the fourth one, but you have to be sure. Absolutely sure," he whispered.

"I've never been surer of anything in my life," she answered quietly. She leaned forward brushing her lips against his and whispered, "Are you sure you want to kiss me?"

"I've wanted to kiss you since you walked out of my training room three years ago," he answered feeling her soft breathing on his lips. He leaned forwards his lips finally meeting hers and the world, the room, everything melted away and it was just Akira sitting in his lap.

He kissed her softly and slowly. His tongue exploring her lower lip, asking for permission to go farther. She granted him entrance and he felt her nip his bottom lip. She moved her hands to unbuckle his vest. He slipped his hand behind her head and crushed her lips against his. He didn't know how they were breathing but the next thing he know she had vest off and pushed him away so she could pull off his shirt.

He could she her pupils dilate with desire. She gave him a smile that reached her eyes. "Damn, Hatake you've been working out," she whispered as he reached over to the hard muscles of his abdomen. Her fingers brushed across his taunt muscles and she watched him take a sharp breath. She raked her fingers across his chest and watched his eyes widen in surprise.

He leaned over and kissed her near her ear, "That is not fair." He heard her give a short laugh. He kissed her jawline until he reached her chin and then dipped down and lightly kissed her neck until he reached her collarbone. He raked his teeth across the hollow and heard her moan and complain, "Not fair."

She fell back on the couch and dragged him down with her. "Kiss me K."

He smiled and lowered his lips to hers, lightly brushing against hers. She leaned in and he pulled away. "Not yet," he teased.

"Not fair," she pouted. "Help me forget." She slipped her fingers through his hair and slowly pushed his head down to hers. Their lips locked and soon both of them were fighting for dominance. She drew back to catch her breath and realized Kakashi was breathing just as heavily as she was. The only thing she could focus on was the hot desire pooling in her belly. He smiled and he pulled off her shirt and lowered his lips near the cup of her bra. She felt his warm lips on her and arched her back. She complained when he pulled back quickly and sat up, bringing her up too because her legs were wrapped tightly around his waist.

"Hey! Why'd you stop?" She complained as he placed a finger on her lips and then she heard it.

BANG. BANG. BANG.

"Hello, is anybody there?" asked a familiar voice.

"Maybe they'll go away," Akira whispered as Kakashi slipped on his shirt.

BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG.

"Ms. Kioshi, I need to speak to you," yelled the voice through the door.

"Maybe not," Akira sighed, getting up and slipping on her shirt. She watched as Kakashi buckled up his vest and then nodded. She walked towards the door. The world hates me, she thought as she tried to wipe the image of Kakashi's chest from her mind.

She put her hand around the handle of the door and Kakashi stopped her. Wait, he mouthed.

BANG. BANG. BANG.

Both Akira and Kakashi jumped back startled.

"Oh for gods sake," Akira snapped. She opened the door and yelled, "We have a doorbell!"

"I tried that," said the man kindly. Akira recognized him as the representative from the Sand Village. The one that liked her, the old man who said she had spunk, Hiro.

Akira felt Kakashi tense up, "The Hokage said to leave her alone."

"I know," Hiro replied. "It's just…I think she has the right to know some things about her family."

"I don't want to know anything about my father," Akira retorted quickly.

"It's about your mother," Hiro responded.

"Akira I don't think this a good idea," Kakashi whispered and he moved beside her, tensing up.

"Stand down, Hatake," Akira sighed. "He is not here to kill me. Are you?"

She watched the old man smile as he shook his head, "Heaven's no."

"What could you possibly tell me about my mom?"

"I knew her when she was a Kimari," Hiro answered.

She never knew much about her mother's past so when he said he knew her before she met her father she was hungry for information. She opened the door all the way and invited him in, she heard Kakashi groan.

"You don't have to listen," she snapped at him.

He looked at her and slipped his fingers between hers, "I'm not going anywhere."

"I'll be in the living room," Hiro said happily as he walked in the house.

Wait, she thought to herself, how does he know where the living room is?

That's the end of this chapter my lovelies! Hope you enjoyed it.