A/N: Finally got back to this story after months. Medical school has been keeping me busy. I also still do not know what to do with Neil. Anyway I will finish this story, however long it takes me.

Chapter 21 (Neil) Choking on the Bones

The reality was that punishing Charlie Dalton only made him a bit of a celebrity, or if not, a curiosity among the students, male and female alike. "It's definitely refuge in audacity," Neil thought as he stopped by the lounge after coming back from a rehearsal. A group was already gathered around Charlie in order to listen to his 'poetic' retelling of the affair. A good many members of the senior class, as well as some of the younger girls were also in attendance.

As Neil looked around, he caught sight of Vanessa sitting by herself in a corner, engrossed in reviewing the contents of a notebook. He quickly walked up to her and touched her shoulder. "Working on something?" he asked candidly.

"Latin," she said, holding up her notes. She swallowed hard as she looked at him. "You ought to go before they start talking about you too."

"What?"

"No one, aside from the Dead Poets, wants to talk to me after what happened this morning."

Neil shook his head. "Let them." He sat next to her and touched her hand. "I can't judge that play you reviewed; I have to see it for myself first," he commented more lightly.

She cracked a smile and leaned into him. "That's the sanest thing I've heard anyone say about what I did. In the few hours you've been gone...well I've been called everything from nigger-lover to troublemaker."

It was all that he could do not to cringe or swear."If I'd been around, I would have had something to say to them," he thought, feeling an unusual rage in him. "So what did you do?" he asked her tentatively.

"I just let them. I've had enough drama for one day," she said, leading Neil to sit with the rest of the group listening to Charlie.

Charlie was keeping time with his hand solemnly beating the bongos. "Assume the position," he chanted in a hollow voice as he continued tapping the drums. Just at that moment, the lounge door opened and Mr. Keating stepped in.

"It's all right," the teacher said kindly before the students scrambled to their feet. He looked directly at Charlie. "That was a pretty lame stunt you pulled today," he continued in a more serious tone.

Charlie's jaw dropped. "You're siding with Mr. Nolan? But what about Carpe Diem and sucking the marrow out of life and all that?"

"Sucking the marrow of life does not mean choking on the bone. Sure there's a time for daring and a time for caution, and a wise man understands which is called for," Mr. Keating continued, not losing his grave tone.

Charlie looked sceptical. "But I thought you'd like that!"

"No. Your being expelled from school is not daring to me," Mr. Keating replied. "It's stupid, since you'll miss some golden opportunities."

"Yes, the opportunity to be censored?" Vanessa chimed in bitterly.

"Again, you must pick the battles you will fight, Miss O'Donnell," Mr. Keating said.

"So should I retract what I wrote?"

The teacher sighed deeply. "Whatever you choose, do it prudently. You must pick the battles you can fight," he advised. "I'm not saying that what you wrote was wrong; but that it simply was not received well."

"A hazard of any writer, I should think," Vanessa muttered.

"He knows she's not going to take back her article," Neil realized, even as he reached over to touch Vanessa's back. He knew why Mr. Keating was erring on the side of caution, but it was evident that the matter had worried the teacher quite deeply.

Charlie rolled his eyes. "I don't see what opportunities can be had in this situation, Captain."

"If nothing else, the opportunity to attend my classes," Mr. Keating said simply. "Got that, Ace?"

A smile spread over Charlie's face. "Aye, aye Captain."

"Keep your head about you. That goes for the lot of you," Mr. Keating said to the group. He shook his head. "Phone call from God...if it had been collect, that would have been daring."

The students chuckled at this quip as Mr. Keating left the room. Charlie adjusted his bongos and motioned for the rest of the group to come nearer. "Alright, let's go on."

As Charlie's recitation ended, Vanessa looked down at her notes and tossed them aside. "I suppose I won't be borrowing your typewriter again any time soon," she said wryly to Neil as the group dispersed.

"What if you didn't have to write just for the school paper here?" Neil suggested, blurting out the first thing that came to mind. "I mean, you said so yourself. There's got to be someplace else you can send your work."

"Hah, I send it in by post and under a pseudonym?"

"Well why not?"

She chuckled and rolled her eyes. "I suddenly had this mental image of myself writing in the middle of the night, hiding in your closet just so Hager won't catch me with your typewriter."

"I'll bring the typewriter to your room if you need it," he offered. "That would be a little easier to explain away."

"Thank you. I'll tell you when I need it," Vanessa said, clasping his hand just as a bell rang signalling the students to proceed to the hall for dinner.

Todd walked by, clutching his Chemistry notebook in one hand. "Are you two up to something?" he asked Neil and Vanessa curiously.

"Just talking about writing," Neil replied. He noticed a loose leaf of paper poking out of Todd's notebook. "You know, it would be great if one day you could read in the cave the poem you've been working on," he said.

Todd turned beet red as he snatched the loose leaf out and stuffed it in his pocket. "It's no good. Not yet. Not like that which Mr. Keating pulled out of me in class."

"But someday you will read it?" Vanessa asked more hopefully.

"Uh, maybe."

"It's pot roast again tonight!" Cameron shouted from the door.

"We can't even digest that stuff, Cameron," Charlie drawled as he walked up. "Guess we weren't expecting that reaction from the Captain, huh?"

"He does have a point," Neil said. "It's not going to do anyone any good if people get expelled."

"You're one to talk, Neil," Cameron chimed in. "What are you going to do then if your father finds out about you being in a play?"

"He's not going to find out!" Neil retorted. Why on earth did Cameron have to bring up this matter at all? "I mean, he's not likely to at least," he added quickly.

"Cameron, really, do you have to do that?" Vanessa asked the redhead irately.

"All I'm saying is that you three are taking risks you don't have to," Cameron said. "I mean this isn't just going to blow over. They're going to keep a tighter watch on things from now on, you'll see."

"Who's they?" Todd asked.

"Nolan and the faculty of course!" Cameron practically exploded. "They're going to eventually get to the truth of everything we're doing."

"I didn't rat any of you out, and nor did Vanessa. And what Neil is doing has nothing to do with you protecting your skin, Cameron," Charlie shot back.

Neil had to grab Cameron's shoulder before he could say anything more to add to the argument. "If you want out, fine. It's not as if you're being forced to stay or agree with everything we do." He had to take a deep breath before continuing; inasmuch as Cameron had been a friend over the past few years, it was still so difficult to get some points across to him. "But you can't stop me from doing the play, and I don't think you can stop Vanessa and Charlie from writing either. Can't you at least respect that?" he asked earnestly.

Cameron shook himself out of Neil's grip. "Fine. I won't say a thing, I'll keep all of your secrets-whatever they are. Like I always have. But one day, you'll hear me say, 'I told you so'," he said before stalking off to the dining hall.

Todd cringed as he glanced from Cameron to his three other friends. "He's not going to stay mad forever," he mumbled.

"He won't," Charlie said confidently. "I can't believe you actually said that to him, Neil."

"I had to. I didn't want to though," Neil replied. The play was coming up, and if he could just manage to stay out of his father's notice for that long, then that would be a victory enough for him. "And let there be more, please let there be more," he thought silently even as he held out his arm to Vanessa so he could walk with her to dinner.

By unspoken agreement, the group did not speak of this argument over dinner, or even at the study group later that evening. In fact Neil did not think about it at all, not until the next morning. He'd set his alarm clock a little earlier than usual in order to get in some extra time for reviewing for Trigonometry, since he was planning on staying late that evening at Henley Hall for rehearsals. As he was dressing for the day, he heard what sounded like raised voices coming from the girls' annex. The connecting door was partially open, so Neil slipped into a corner to listen to what this commotion was all about.

"You have no idea what your foolishness is doing to me, Vanessa! All I ask is that you behave yourself, and you give in to this rebellious, disobedient side of yours! How am I supposed to trust you being here-how do I know you haven't been up to other mischief?" an older woman shouted shrilly. "All my friends have been asking what on earth I've been letting you read to give you those ideas!"

"Mom, I just wrote a review about a play," Vanessa's voice replied tersely. "There's nothing wrong with a play that's about a family trying to make its way in the world."

"A play about Negroes!"

"It's not as if they are invisible or bad or something so wrong. Other writers do stories about them too and the government doesn't censor them for that,"

"I don't care about what other writers do. You're my daughter and I don't want people getting the idea that I've raised you to run wild and have your head all wrong on your shoulders. You're lucky that Mr. Nolan didn't take the first chance to expel you," Vanessa's mother retorted. "You should thank your father that he was able to talk with Mr. Nolan to go easy on you. I was all for pulling you out of this school but your father thinks you can still learn a lesson or two here."

"He's not my father!"

The telltale smack of a hand connecting with a cheek rang out in the morning quiet. "Don't you dare talk about him that way! You owe him everything; we would still be living on nothing if it weren't for him," Mrs. O'Donnell seethed. "You will recant that piece from the school paper. Please, for our family's sake. Not just for me and your father, but even for your brother."

"They've already kicked me off the staff," Vanessa murmured. "You don't have to worry about anything anymore. And they won't pick on John for it; he's doing well enough on his own without me."

The older woman sighed. "You know I love you, Vanessa."

"Yeah. I love you too, Mom. I'll see you this Christmas."

"I know you'll be a good girl. See you then."

Neil waited for the sound of Mrs. O'Donnell's footsteps to fade on the stairway before he slipped out of his corner. He swallowed hard as he caught sight of Vanessa standing in the hallway, holding one hand to her rapidly reddening right cheek. She was wearing a faded pink bathrobe over her nightclothes. "Van..." he whispered, not really sure what to say now to her.

The girl took a deep shaky breath. "I thought...she'd be on my side."

"What exactly did she mean about her friends asking her?" Neil asked, going over to look at Vanessa's cheek. A livid red handprint was forming there; it would be impossible to cover it up in time for class.

"More like the friends of her husband. They pounce on any possible gossip they can find, even if it's about other people's children," Vanessa said bitterly. She hissed as she felt Neil's fingers on her skin. "I've got to get some cold water on this. It looks bad, doesn't it?"

"It will fade later," Neil said, hoping to reassure her. There was no way he could pretend to understand what she was going through; inasmuch as he hated his own situation he knew that Vanessa's troubles were in another league altogether. He let go of her and waited as she went into the bathroom to wash her face and comb her hair out.

After a few minutes she emerged, looking quite composed except for the fact that her eyes were a little puffy and red. "So what are you doing up so early?" she asked less morosely.

"Studying. I have rehearsals till past dinner time tonight," Neil said. "I can't believe the play is coming up in less than two weeks."

Vanessa counted out on her fingers. "Nine days! Time flies fast when you're having fun, doesn't it?"

"You're telling me," Neil agreed. It really did seem like yesterday when he'd decided to attend the audition. He reached for Vanessa to pull her close so he could kiss her forehead. "You sure you'll be okay? I mean, aside from your cheek?"

"I can deal. Honestly. We just have this sort of discussion some times, that's all," Vanessa said. She sighed as she looked down at her own state of undress. "I'll just get ready for the day and I'll join you in the lounge."

"You could still get a few minutes of rest," he pointed out. Judging by the circles under Vanessa's eyes, it looked like she'd need it.

She shook her head. "I don't want to get back to sleep, not anymore."